Yaaaaayy update. Arr, I hated this chapter. It was so awkward and a mean writer's block was giving me a concussion.

Anyway, on wiv da fic!

"That's why they call them crushes. If they were easy, they'd call them something else."

-Sixteen Candles

Fear Overcomes the Want

That week was a tough one for Robin.

As one does, Robin had gone to bed that night with his mind ablaze at his discovery while waiting for Raven. He didn't wait for he much longer; he realized how nervous he was at the prospect of talking to Raven and hurried back to his room, leaving the table, his stick, the balls and the cue in places they would be for a very long time.

He lay in bed, rolled on his back with his hands behind his head, and stared at the ceiling, covered with photographs. Simple Polaroids, of his friends, Bruce, and a very old one of his younger self with his family. His eyes lingered on Raven in the photo of the Titans. Beast Boy had taken it; he was trying to get in front of the shot before the timer stopped. In the picture, the frame was skewed, and Beast Boy was in mid-stumble to the floor.

She was sitting on the couch in the living room, her face hid partially behind a book. Unsmiling. He was beside her, smiling only a little. This was before the Day.

It was almost strange to see her looking so grim. The Raven in the picture did no justice to the girl she was now; who got up in the middle of the night and consented to play pool with a spikey-haired boy.

'But what happened?' he thought over again. Only awhile ago he had been thinking (hoping) that her reaction to him had been a mirror of his own feelings, until doubt clouded his sky of hopes.

"What if I'm just fooling myself…" he trailed off. The elated feeling in his chest had turned into a painful knot in his gut. With one more look at the violet-haired girl in the photo, Robin rolled over and drifted into a very uneasy, very confused sleep.

She is afraid.

But she is free now.

And that makes it worse.

Emotions are a part.

She's never truly felt them before.

She is afraid of what she wants.

"Raven has hidden in her room again, Robin."

Starfire drifted out of the hall for what seemed like the twentieth time that week.

"She in getting thinner friends," Starfire said softly, her voice laced with worry. "I think she is not well."

Robin said nothing; just stared absently into the dark granite countertop, shoulders hunched.

"Friends, we must do something. Raven needs our help." Starfire continued in a hushed but firm voice.

"Do you think it has anything to do with Trigon?" Cyborg offered, speaking to all but staring pointedly at Robin, who seemed to ignore him.

"Maybe something happened at the fight downtown today," Beast Boy piped in "I could change into an ant and check up on her." He demonstrated, turning into a little green ant and scuttling across the counter.

Robin brought the flat of his hand down in a sharp smack on the counter, only an inch from Beast Boy, who changed back abruptly and glared at Robin before hopping off the counter.

"It's not Trigon," he muttered throatily "but she's not sick."

"Then what could be wrong?" Starfire asked.

"I'll talk to her," Robin answered, the tone of his voice finalizing the hushed discussion.

"When it's right to."

It was about 10:15 pm. The Teen Titans were turning in for the night. Once they were asleep Raven was considering sneaking out to grab some food to sate her growling stomach. She was in the process of healing the wound in her leg she'd acquired earlier that day, but her energy was low due to hunger, so the process was going frustratingly slow. Raven replaced her dagger on its shelf. It had an antique look to it, the hilt and guard were once clear silver, but had tarnished to a darker, almost iron-looking metal. On the handle, Azarathian runes and symbols were carved in fine script.

The strange cactus-like villain had struck again, and Raven had been caught in the path of a rain of cactus spikes. She had managed to hide the spine embedded in her thigh from her teammates, and she avoided the hospital room, only stopping to gather some anti-septic and bandages, before retreating to her room once again. She didn't want to be caught. She didn't want to talk. Digging and prying the deeply set spine from her leg as delicately as possible with the tip of her dagger was an experience she never wanted to weather again.

At 10:16, her leg half-healed, Raven limped in the most dignified way she could over to the door. She was reaching for the doorknob when a green-gloved knock came from the other side.

Raven froze.

Oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no….

Another knock, this time more persistent.

"Raven?"

Panic ensued. She couldn't talk to him! What if it happened again?

"Raven?"

'Maybe he saw my injury,' she thought frantically 'Yah, he just saw…'

She opened the door only a crack to peek out at the masked eyes staring back at her.

"Can I talk to you?"

Robin thought for a moment that she was going to slam the door in his face from the way she looked at him.

"Can I talk to you?"

She looked hesitant, her violet eyes wide and nervous.

"Please, Raven." He muttered. Another pause. She opened the door wider to let him pass, and asked in hard tone, "What do you want?"

'Please let it be about the wounds.'

Robin didn't speak at once. His eyes were scanning around her shadowed room. He'd never so much as peeked inside before.

"Robin." Raven's voice grated, bringing him back to attention.

"I want to talk to you."

"What about?" she was on the defensive.

"Well," he started; matter-of-factly "You've been pretty scarce lately, and Starfire says you've gotten thinner, you look paler…than usual…" he listed. Raven remained expressionless.

"And about you running out on me in the middle of our game."

Raven silently thanked the darkness for hiding the deep blush she felt spread over her cheeks.

"I haven't been meditating well lately." She answered half-truthfully. She really hadn't, but it wasn't the reason.

"That's why you ran out?" He sounded fierce.

"Something came up."

There was another tension-ridden pause between them.

"I'm disinclined to believe that." Robin's tone changed from concerned friend to firm leader.

"Are you angry with me Robin?" she growled, with a hint of challenge.

"Maybe." He said coolly. "Why are you bleeding?"

Raven's eyes darted to her leg; the wound had opened again to let a fresh trickle of blood to trail down her leg.

"Damn." Raven cursed quietly, shrinking away from Robin and huddled to the floor to examine her leg.

"Raven-"

"It's nothing Robin, I can handle it." She growled

"No, you need-"

"Robin, stop!"

He was knelt in front of her, his hands on her shoulders, ready to push her to sit.

"Raven, you're in a tough condition. You're undernourished and unable to use your powers to their highest extent," he paused to look at her; her expression a mite scandalized.

"You once said I knew you best." He said his tone gentle once more.

She sat down.

"What happened?"

"The cactus thing," she explained softly "My leg got in the way of a spine."

His fingers grazed lightly over her injured leg, sending a shiver through her body.

"I meant the game the other night."

Beneath his fingers he felt her body tense.

"Nothing Robin. Leave it alone."

'You have the right to know,' said a harsh-toned voice somewhere deep in his mind 'If you're as close as you think you are, you should know.'

"No. I won't leave it alone."

Something in Robin's demeanor has changed.

Something in his voice.

A plea.

Does he feel…?

She is afraid.

"I can't leave it alone."

The two of them are oblivious to their surroundings. Oblivious to the time, the place, and the objects on the shelves, wobbling violently, enclosed in dark energy and rising.

The dagger shakes the most.

Part of her wants it.

'Rational thought' tells her no.

It causes hurt.

It causes discord.

Robin hung his head, sighing. Raven is still, almost afraid to move. He takes her shaking hands in his and pulls her with him as he stands. His eyes meet hers through the mask; holding her gaze, searching.

The shadows block out her face.

Poor confused boy.

He draws a little closer to her, as if testing her limits. She'd compare her heartbeat to a hummingbird's beating wings if she could think clearly.

She can't think.

'Don't say it Robin, don't, please…

Afraid.

He's stumbling over his words; squeezing her hands gently, he mutters "I don't know what to feel-"

"Then don't!" her voice reaches a panicked pitch as she pulls her hands from his comforting grip. Her proclamation echoes eerily through the room, and a chill seems to settle. Objects are whirling around the room dangerously.

She moves away from him, but his hands latch onto her upper-arms, harsher as she struggles.

And everything snaps.

Fear overcomes the want.

She stumbles into him when his grip suddenly does limp. His teeth are gritted and grinding. "Robin?"

She grabs his shoulders are he holds he waist to stay standing. Her fingers meet a hard, cold edge covered in something wet, sticky and warm.

Her dagger in buried half-way to the hilt in his shoulder.

His goes pale, and the floor rushes up to meet him.

Ooo cliffhanger! But rest assured! Only one more chapter before the healing can start!

What that a pun...?