Disclaimer / Author's Note: I do not own FMA, nor do i make money off of the fictions i write ABOUT FMA... If you sue me, I will sue you back for fradulent lawsuit... Then, All you'll hear from me is a 'Thank you for the cash.' Ahahahah! Eh, Anyway.. Enjoy.
Break me, Take me.
Chapter Two: Unfortunate Circumstances...
It was just another day in Central.. Rain falling, and everyone more annoyed than hell. The young man in the red overcoat continued to drift his way towards the Head Quarters... Brigadier General, My ass... He sighed... He was going to take over the position of his now deceased boss? That's not even right.. Though, He knew that if Roy had taken over the position of Fuhrer he would have made every woman in the damn military wear skirts... It's.. Just.. Still, Why did they have to give HIM the job? Why did he have to do the damn dirty work Roy had left in his assasination.. It was his entire plan to refuse the job.
"There's no way i'm taking that huge-ass roll in the fucking military after Al finally has his body back.. I just want to be left the hell alone..." Edward growled under his breath.
He now stood outside the gate... He slowly pushed them open, and slid inside... Dragging his feet towards the main office, and slowly being saluted by every damn person in the building... Until he heard a familiar voice..
"Hello, Brigadier General Elric!" Perky... No... I'll kill'm if...
He turned around to find, of course,... Havoc... He growled, and continued on the way to Roy's ex office... As he opened the door, He found something odd...
"Schiezka?" It was, indeed, the librarian whom he had spent so much time around... She immediately gasped, and spun around.. almost falling over the chair behind her... He sighed, and glanced about.
"Erm, Uh! Yes, Sir Brigadier General Elric!" Again, he sighed...
"Shut the hell up.. I'm refusing the job, and everyone knows it." She looked at him shocked... A large blush on her face... Which was the thing he caught next..
"Why are you blushing?" She fumbled around... Her body obscured by the chair she had almost tripped over, and smiled idioticly.
"Uhm! NO REASON!..." He glared at her... She sighed, and looked about.
"Close the door please..." Her voice had a seductive tone to it...
"Schiezka, You were'nt mastur-" WHAM! A book that had laid on the desk clashed right into his forehead.. He growled loudly, and began to flail his arms.
"WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR YOU SLUT!" She blushed even redder.
"Don't say it!" He rubbed the knot on his head..
"Oh, Sorry.. I forgot i promised not to tell anyone..." She breathed a sigh of relief.
"Of course you did, Now can you let me finish, or help me already?" He turned redder than she was.. He immediately rushed out of the door...
"Jeez..." He said as he ran out of the building... Face redder than a stop-sign. Why the hell does she have to do that in that office? Honestly, She knows i'm the only one who goes in there anymore!.. Wait a second... IS THAT WHY! NO! He ran even faster... Nose sending a river of crimson fluid as he did so. No no no no! Schiezka does NOT want me in bed! NO BAD EDWARD! ARGH!
Two Hours Later...
So.. What to do now..? He sighed as he sat on the train making it's way to Risembool.. He promised Al he would stop by mother's grave while he was going to see Psi-Erm-Clara... She had settled down in Risembool shortly after... Ahem... Well, That's another story for another day! He blushed bright red at the thought of the occurences on that day..
Half an Hour Later...
He stepped off the train, and immediately spotted the, rather busty, blonde woman... He walked up to her, and smiled.
"Hey, Long time no see." He said as she smiled back.
"It has been, Hase'nt it? How's my faviorite chibi-sized lover been?" He, of course, went on a rampage..
"WHO ARE YOU CALLING A BEAN-SPROUT CHIBI BUG?" She laughed like a hyena, and he fumed...
"Oh, Calm down Ed... You know you've gotten taller since last time." She smiled, and he hugged her for the compliment... Though, He immediately lept back when he felt something straddling his crotch.
"What the hell, Clara! Is everyone a pervert today!" First, Schiezka.. Now her?... She grinned, and dragged him away from the station...
"HEY! Where are we going?" She grinned back at him as he flailed in the wind from her speed.
"To my house, of course..." He blushed an extreme shade of crimson.
"What the hell! Why the hell do you have to be such a nymph!" He yelled as he finally caught the ground with his feet.. trying to keep up with her..
"Because, Your just that good.." She teased, and He, of course, blushed bright enough to be seen in space.
"LEMME GO DAMNIT! I'm not going to let you screw me again!" He pulled back against her... Trying to run in the opposite direction, but only being hiked off his feet again.
"I must disagree!" He growled lowly, and dragged along the road towards a small quaint home... What the hell is it with this woman, and sex... Honestly... I had a boner 24/7 not too long ago, and she STILL Out-sexed me. He sighed as she dragged him inside.
Author's Note: Humorous is'nt it? Kinda crude too, but that's the point of crude humor!