Chapter 8

John Carter slowly approached the small patio table. He smiled at Abby as he watched her sit patiently. Something wasn't right with her. She had been acting uncomfortable all night and the suddenly she fled to the bathroom and disappeared for 20 minutes. He wanted, hell he needed to know if she was ok but he still feared that she wouldn't open up to him – not after everything that has went on with them. He sighed and realised that he should still give it a shot. Carter pulled the heavy, steal chair from under the table and sat down. He looked up and locked eyes with his ex, his friend, and he smiled.

"Hey" He said quietly.

Abby smiled

"Hey Carter" she replied with a sad tone in her voice.

They sat across from one another in silence, staring at one-another; both lost for words.

"I uhh…" Carter was first to snap out of the daze as he cleared his throat. Abby allowed her eyes to return once again to the table.

"I wanted to make sure you're ok" He said.

She smiled at him. "You and Susan are relentless you know that?" She joked hoping that returning to their old banter would shift the conversation away from what was about to unfold.

He laughed. "Of course we are, we've gotta look out for each other"

Abby looked confused. "What?"
"Well, you, Susan, Luka and myself are the "old-school". Someone has got to look out for us and it might as well be each other"

"Old School?" Abby questioned
"Well yeah…and Weaver…"
"But she doesn't count" Abby interrupted

"Of course not, she's no where near as cool as we are" He smiled

"Very true" Abby agreed, relieved at the comfort they both found in talking like this.

Both Carter and Abby continued to smile at one another. Her heart was aching; she was dying to tell him what was going on but knew she couldn't, not now. He was getting married in the morning. Typical Abby, she thought, for leaving things to the last minute.

They were once again plunged into silence. Carter noticed the ring on Abby's finger and he felt as though his heart had skipped a beat. He continued to stare at it as Abby glanced around.
He lifted his head and decided to ask her about it.
"So…when's the wedding?" he asked.

Abby gave him an increasingly worried face. She narrowed her eyes as she stared at him and said "Tomorrow Carter…" She shook her head in disbelief whilst laughing

"Isn't tonight a bit of a give away?" she smiled.
Carter laughed. "You're a comedienne, you know that?" She chuckled.

Carter straightened his face "I meant yours" He said whilst pointing at her left hand.

Abby became increasingly aware of the ring on her finger and began to shift her weight on the seat. She looked up at Carter as she began to fidget with the ring on her finger and smiled at him.

"Ohh…I uhh…we're not…well" She flustered. "We haven't set a date yet." As she said this she shook her head.

"Ohh…ok" Carter responded.

She smiled at him as she said "Don't worry Carter, I'll return your invitation"
He stifled a laugh as he focused his attention to the table. He took a deep breath as he plucked up the courage to say "Jake's a very lucky guy"

He watched her response. Abby smiled and turned her head away from Carter. She laughed as she said "Right…I don't think you hold the monopoly on that one…but thank you"

Abby fell into deep thought and smiled to herself. She turned her attention back to Carter who had been watching her.

"and…I hope that Kem realises just how lucky she is to have you" Abby said quietly placing great emphasis on the word 'you'.

Abby could feel tears forming in her eyes and she struggled to fight them back. Carter continued to watch her. A sad smile crept across his face as she turned to lock eyes with him.

He stared at her.

"I'm happy for you…" He lied.

Abby looked further into his eyes.
"I'm happy for you too…" She lied.

"Is everything ok? You've just…not been yourself." Carter enquired.

Abby sighed. "What? No, I'm fine Carter." He threw her a questioning look. "No…I uhh, I'm fine, really."

Carter stopped her "Because you know…if you ever need to…"

"Yeah, I know…" She interrupted.

"I just feel like we've lost touch of one-another so much recently that…that we don't know how to be around each other without it…" Carter flustered towards the end. "Without it being…" He paused.

"Without it being awkward?" Abby questioned.

"Right. We should fix that" he said, calmly.

Abby gave Carter a doubtful smile and sat back in her seat. She sat twiddling her thumbs for the several long minutes spent in silence until she broke it.

"Why do we always leave things to the last minute?" She said slowly.

Carter looked at her and asked "What do you mean?"
Abby drew a long breath. "Well, we didn't start talking to one-another properly until the weeks before you left…" She paused and looked into Carters eyes which begged her to continue.
"…and here we are, telling one-another that we'll always be in each others lives when tomorrow…tomorrow you leave to spend the rest of your life in Africa and I'll go back to Chicago…"

Carter opened his mouth suggesting that he was going to speak. Abby raised her hand asking him to stop.

She continued "…the sad fact being that after Jake and I…get married…" she said with a doubtful laugh as Carter felt a lump form in his throat. "…after the wedding, the chances of us seeing each other again are second-to-none." She stated.

Carter could feel his eyes welling up; he reached across the table and placed his hand on top of Abby's. She gave him a doubtful smile and continued to look at him.

"We won't loose touch" He stated. Abby widened her eyes and shook her head.

"Don't lie John, we've spent the better part of two years ignoring each other and we live in the same city, go to work in the same hospital – we see each other everyday. Do you honestly expect it to work half-way across the world?" She questioned

He took note of what she was saying. He knew she was right, it wouldn't work. There is still too much left hanging up in the air for them to go back to the old way they once were. Carter knew this but he still wanted…needed Abby in his life.

He sighed and gripped her hands tighter. "We can make it work" He said, re-assuring her.
Abby diverted her eyes from his and focused once again on the table.

She shook her head and as she raised her head back up to face him she said "What's the point?..."

Carter wasn't sure if he was to answer. Abby stifled a laugh as she spoke; "…I mean really, it's never going to go back to how it was…things are just too…different now…it's just…I don't want to…I mean" She stuttered.

Carter picked up on her discomfort. "Abby, shh. It's okay…really" Abby moved her hand from the pile under his and brought it up to her face to wipe away the one stray tear that had made its way down her face. Carter took hold of her other hand and their fingers intertwined he squeezed her hand.

"It's okay…I understand." He said lucidly. Abby diverted his gaze, looking over towards the veranda on her right-side. Carter tugged on her hand.
"Hey" He smiled. "I know that things have changed a lot, ok? I know that, but it still doesn't mean that I don't want you in my life…that I don't need you in my life."
Abby didn't believe a word that was coming out of his mouth. She rolled her eyes as he spoke.
"You don't need me John" She said with a somewhat angry tone in her voice. His eyes pleaded with her, but she continued.

"Just like you didn't need me when you left, or when you came back with Kem or at any point last year!" Her voice and tone escaladed as she spoke. She could feel the tears welling up in her eyes.

Carter was shocked at her outburst; he was ashamed at himself for making her feel like that.

Both Carter and Abby sat and stared at one-another for what felt like hours, mere seconds in real time. Abby's face was red with fury and Carter's was equally red with embarrassment as someone approached from the side of their vision.

As he got closer he spoke. "Hey!" He noticed the discomfort on both Carter and Abby's face and asked "What's going on?

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