Declining Grace
Chapter Nine
Never Return

Delainia stood in front of her father, waiting for him to acknowledge her. He seemed not to notice she was even there, despite her location. She stared at him for several moments before deciding what to do.

"Daddy?" Her voice broke the eerie silence of the room. Delainia didn't realize how defeated she sounded when she whispered that one word to the man. Shawn heard it, though, from behind the two-sided mirror where he watched the exchange.

Patrick looked up at her, but he didn't really see her. Delainia knew that. He hadn't really seen her since he'd returned. He blinked once or twice, and she saw how broken he was. She couldn't overlook it the way she had before. She wished desperately she could; she wished she could see her father, dancing in the flat with her mother while she looked on and hoped she'd find a prince just like her daddy. But the illusion was gone. Her father was gone.

"Laini? Is that you?"

"Yes, Daddy. It's me."

His eyes lit with a radiance that had long been lost since he'd been taken back into Homeland Security custody.

"They let you in here. I'm so glad they let you come, Laini. I'm so sorry you have to see me like this. You're my little girl and you shouldn't have to. But I'm so glad you're here, darling girl."

Delainia's eyes misted at the tone in his voice. He sounded so distressed, but there was nothing she could do to soothe it.

"Now where is your mother? Is she bailing me out of this blasted place?"

Delainia kneeled before her father's chair and took his hands in hers. She squeezed them while she tried to calm herself enough to speak. She took several deep breaths, allowing the oxygen to spread over her.

"Daddy, Mum died a while ago. I've told you before. She died while you were away. She contracted leukemia, and nothing we did saved her. She left Kaleen and me behind. Kaleen's your other daughter. I introduced you to her. Please remember, Daddy."

Patrick stared at Delainia like she was the one that was crazy, not the other way around. But Delainia could see the recognition in his eyes. He could understand what she was saying and part of her though he was starting to believe her. She hoped so. She hoped there was some way to get through to him.

Patrick started to shake his head. How could Delainia take a part in this game the police wanted to play with him? She was his little girl and she was feeding him the same lies the detectives were. How could she do that to him? She wouldn't do that. She wouldn't. He watched her and saw an older girl, an older Delainia, but just as fast the image was gone. But he still wondered if Delainia was telling the truth. If she was, the condescending voice could be telling the truth as well. About everything. The women. Coral. Delainia. No. That couldn't be possible. He couldn't have hurt those women. He would never hurt a woman. Ever. Panic shot through him and he couldn't stop tears from welling in his eyes. He no longer thought about appearances, only of what could possibly be true.

Delainia tried to think of a way to alleviate some of the pain her father was feeling as she watched several emotions fall over his features. She had to help him.

"She never believed you abandoned her, Daddy, not even when everyone else said it. She loved you until the day she died. She believed in you."

Patrick struggled in the chair, wanting to jump to his feet and shake her for saying those things and hug her all at once.

"I'm so sorry, Daddy."

"I love you, Laini. I love my family." He repeated the last phrase several times, as if a personal mantra that helped calm his troubled mind. Delainia rose to her feet so she could embrace her father. She felt him crying in her shoulder and she soon began to cry as well. The wounds on the Grace family were deep, thanks to whoever had taken Patrick, and it would be a long time before any of them were healed.

Delainia pulled away from him and stared into his eyes. She couldn't remember a time she'd seen him more aware. She had to take advantage of it. She had to know why he had done what he'd done.

"Why did you do it? Why did you take those women, Daddy?"

He shook his head, refusing to answer. He started to fall back into his mind; saw Coral with her brown hair tied back in a low ponytail, her blue eyes sparkling with love for him as she outstretched her arms for him, beckoning him to come back to her. His demeanor changed almost instantly. He slumped back down into his chair and his eyes held an odd glitter to them. Delainia stepped away from him, suddenly afraid of what she saw.

"Daddy? Daddy? Answer me, please. I need to know. I have to know. Please."

She was back on her knees, almost begging. But he didn't see her anymore. He didn't want to see her. She stared at her father blankly, all emotion flowing out of her. He turned to the mirror and in his mind, he saw Coral there.

"Darling, I've missed you so much. I'm sorry I had to go away, but I promise it won't happen again, Coral. I'm here to stay."

Delainia didn't know what to do. Her tears were gone, dried up, and all that was left was the dry feeling in the pit of her stomach. She was never going to get her father back. He was lost to everyone. He had his world and he likely wasn't going to leave it. She jumped to her feet, turned on her heel and fled to the door. She pounded on the door with all the anger she felt to let the guard know that she was ready to leave. She turned back to see her father one more time. He had a curious smile on his face as he held some imaginary conversation with his late wife, but she only saw her father in him.

"I love you, Daddy."

She slipped into the hallway as soon as the door was opened and she fled the room.

The silence in Shawn's car was deafening. Delainia seemed unable to form words after everything that Tom and Diana had told her after her visit with her father. Shawn couldn't really blame Delainia for the silent treatment. He had watched her with her father. He had seen how much the man loved Delainia and how badly it hurt Delainia to see him like that. Nothing would be able to stop the pain she was feeling. No one could even relate to what she was going through, not even him, a 4400. Another wave of bitterness rose inside of him as he cursed the people who had sent them back. After all they had done, taken them from their loved ones, they had to give powers that harmed more than helped, and left them broken and without explanation. He hated whoever had done this to him, but he would never be able to see them face-to-face to curse them for what they had done. Didn't they know that they had played with people's lives, ruined them? Did they know what would happen?

Shawn took his eyes off the road for a moment to look at Delainia. Her hair fell in her face, blocking the emotion on her features. He wished he could see what she was feeling so he could help heal her, even if it was just for a few moments. But she wouldn't let him see her. She couldn't let him see her. She was afraid to.

"What are you going to do now, Delainia?"

"Do what I've always done. Take care of Kaleen. Go to school. Try to forget what he's done."

"Is that going to work?"

"You heard what Diana said. He won't be out for a long time. He's hurt people, killed them, and he has the capacity to do it again. He doesn't know what he's doing and he's dangerous. They have to keep him locked up. For everyone's safety. What if he turned on Kaleen?"

"He wouldn't turn on his family. That's why he did everything he did. For family."

"He doesn't accept Kaleen as part of that. And I'll do whatever I have to just so she'll be safe. She needs me to protect her."

"Who's going to protect you, Delainia?"

Shawn pulled into Delainia's driveway and shut off the engine. He unfastened his seatbelt before turning to face her. Delainia seemed to be at a loss for words. She'd never really thought about it. There wasn't anyone to keep her safe, not since her mother died. When her father had returned, she had hoped so much that the burden would be lifted, hoped that she would have someone to lean on again. But that hadn't worked as she had planned. Nothing ever did.

"I don't need protecting, Shawn. I stopped needing it along time ago. You learn to deal with things as they come. You should know that. You've had to deal with as much as I have."

"And I've had people to help me; Nikki, my mom, even you. But you haven't had anyone."

"I've had you lately…when you're not so incorrigible that I can't stand talking to you."

Shawn sent her a small smile and tried to get her to smile in return. But she didn't. He wondered if he'd see her smile again. She was so sad now, all the time. Maybe she always had been and he hadn't realized it until now.

"You do have me, Delainia. You will. Anytime you need me."

"I've seen that. I think that maybe my earlier judgments about you were a little off the mark."

"Just a little?"

"Well, I was right about you being cute."

Shawn pulled her to him, pressing his mouth to hers. The kiss was gentle and kind, more of a comfort to her than being full of lust. Delainia allowed herself a brief moment to fall into it, to let herself a moment's peace before she pulled away from him. Shawn's hand cupped her cheek and she sat in the car for a moment, just staring at him.

"Thank you."

Shawn nodded, the only movement left in the car. He was afraid that if he spoke, the spell would be broken. Unfortunately, it still was.

"Kaleen will be here any minute. Diana said she would drop her off. I need to tell her about Dad. Explain things."

"Do you want me to stay and help you?"

"No. I think this is something I need to do by myself. It'll be easier if it's just me talking to her."

"Whatever you need. You know, Delainia, this is all going to turn out okay. You'll be okay."

Delainia tried to smile for him, but inside she knew his words were lies. Things wouldn't be okay. But she would be able to live with them. Especially if Shawn stuck around. He might even make things seem okay for a few hours. She leaned in and kissed Shawn one more time before she got out of the car and headed into the house. It was time to talk to Kaleen. She just had to figure out what to say.

Delainia heard the door slam and she braced herself for Kaleen's appearance. Her sister ran into the room straight into Delainia's arms. Delainia held Kaleen tightly, her hands stroking the little girl's back, her mind wandering. She pulled away from Kaleen and looked at her. Her eyes softened at the sight of her sister.

"I've got to talk to you, baby girl."

"I know. Maia told me you had bad news to give me."

Delainia sighed and muttered to herself, "I don't imagine she explained everything to you as well."

Kaleen heard it, but chose to ignore the tone it was said in. "No, she didn't, but she did tell me that everything was going to turn out okay. And you know Maia is always right."

Delainia wished that she could have faith in Kaleen's friend, but she couldn't quite trust the psychic. Not because she thought Maia was lying to them, but because Delainia had stopped hoping things would be okay a long time ago.

"She seems to be, doesn't she? Now Kaleen, what I have to tell you is very serious, but it isn't your fault in any way. Neither of us have anything to do with what happened. I don't even think it's our father's fault."

"He did something bad?" Kaleen's eyes were wide and trusting and Delainia hated herself for having to take another piece of Kaleen's innocence away from her. It seemed that all Delainia got to share with her sister was pain and suffering.

"He did something very bad. You know I've told you that he hasn't been himself, that's he's been sick since he came back."

Kaleen nodded solemnly. That had been all Delainia had told her since Patrick's return. That what he did wasn't because of her at all, but because of him being taken by the others. She had tried to believe that, had to believe it because she'd never even met her father until he'd returned. But sometimes she wondered if it was her fault he was the way he was.

"Well, he missed Mum quite a lot. He didn't want to believe that she had died."

"Kind of like I didn't want to believe it?"

"Yes, exactly like that. He loved Mum a whole lot and when he came back and she was gone, his heart was broken, as was his mind. He wanted to recapture our family…our family before he left."

Kaleen nodded again, not sure what that had to do with him doing bad things. He just wanted to have a family. She wanted that too. She had hoped for that when he'd returned. But Patrick wasn't at all the way Delainia had described him when she was little. He wasn't what either of them had thought.

"Well, trying to recapture that family, he ended up hurting some people. A lot. And because of that he has to go to prison now."

"He's going away again?"

"Yes. Homeland Security took him into custody and they're going to take care of him until he gets better, until he pays for what he did. He has to be punished, just like you do when you get in trouble."

"But he's sick. You always said that."

"I know. And they will take that into consideration. But he won't be able to come back to us for a very long time."

Kaleen curled into her sister's arms, confusion written on her face. She was an intelligent child, but there was only so much she could understand. Delainia could see it on her face and she wanted to help ease the bewilderment, but she had no idea how to do that. Delainia herself was confused and she only had Shawn to help her.

"What's going to happen to us, then, Laini?"

Delainia kissed her sister's forehead and then lifted her head so they're eyes met.

"It will be just like before Daddy came back. I still have custody of you. I will still take care of you. You're life won't change too much. Daddy just won't be here anymore. It'll be us only again. The sisters club only."

"I'll still be with you."

"Yes. And we won't move away or anything. I rather like Seattle."

"You rather like Shawn."

Delainia narrowed her eyes and playfully slapped Kaleen's arms. But instead of continuing with the joke that Kaleen made, she chose to finish reassuring Kaleen of their family.

"We'll stay here. You'll still go to school and still be friends with Maia. In fact, Ms. Skouris said you could come over to play with Maia anytime, and she'll help us out. That will be good, won't it?"

"Yes."

"So you'll be fine. We'll be fine." Delainia almost believed it when she said it.

"Maia told me everything would be okay, remember?"

Delainia hugged Kaleen tightly. Maybe it would be all right. Just maybe. With Diana's help in caring for Kaleen, she wouldn't have so much to worry about. And Shawn would be there for her. He'd shown that. And she would try to be there for him as well. She'd sort of found herself a family while living in Seattle. They weren't blood, but they would be good enough. At least until her father was healed.

"Will I have to go see him?"

"No, you won't have to if you don't want to. It may be best if we wait for him to see you anyway."

"Because he doesn't remember me."

"Yes. He will one day. He just needs time."

"I can wait. I have you."

Kaleen settled herself in Delainia's lap, her head resting on Delainia's shoulder.

"You will always have me. I love you, kid."

"I love you, too, Laini."

Delainia was content to hold her sister in place, while her mind raced. Things would go back to the way they were with her father in custody. They had gotten used to it being the two of them against the world and it would go back to that again. It wouldn't be so bad, after all. It would just be like he'd never returned. Until he remembered everything. Then the world would be topsy-turvy all over again. But until then she would give Kaleen a semi-normal, stable life. And they would try to be happy. As they had been before.

THE END!