Where were we? Ah, yes. Ginny and Harry are parents and are still in the process of "name our son!", while Hermione has given birth to twins. We're back to focus on the Weasleys.

-----

"Oh, for fuck's sake, Ronald, there's no more!" Hermione lifted her head up to yell at her husband, after the little stunt he pulled at the end of the last chapter.

"I'm just checking, I mean, we thought we were having one and all of a sudden, we've doubled in offspring! What if there's another?" Ron paled at the thought of triplets.

"No, Mr. Weasley, there are no more. You are both parents to a little boy and a little girl." The healer brought over both children and set them on Ron and Hermione.

"Ron! Holy fuck, we're parents!" Hermione began bawling and held their son. Ron simply stared at the little pink bundle on his lap.

"Ron, pick her up."

"No."

"Well, why not?"

"I'll break her."

"No, you won't."

"Yes I will."

"Just pick her up."

"But-"

"Do it, or the couch!"

"Alright, alright! Geez, baby, your mummy is certainly cranky." Ron stared at his daughter, who was now officially in his arms and giving him the oddest of looks.

"Oh, I forgot, I'm daddy, and I'm calmer." Hermione snorted at that, but Ron ignored her. "Mummy's there, and she has a temper, so don't get her mad. And you should read. And play Quidditch. But don't take Divination. It's bad. Don't kick your brother, either. I'll sic Mummy on you if you do."

"I resent that."

"Yes, Mione, I know you do."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means I know you didn't like it."

"Well, then why did you say it?"

"I'm warning our daughter."

"She's not even ten minutes old and you're shoving crap into her brain! I can't believe you!"

"I'm not shoving crap into her brain, I'm warning her!"

"Oh, bullshit!"

"Don't swear!"

"Who are you to talk?"

"I'm the daddy, and I wear the pants!" Hermione laughed as Ron gave her a rather scathing look.

"You wish, Ronald. You're just my bitch."

"Don't swear!" Ron covered his daughter's little ears. Hermione turned to answer but Mrs. Weasley came bustling in with the rest of the Weasley clan, or at least those who had not just had a baby.

"Hermione! Where's my grandchild?"

"Which one?"

"There's multiple?"

"Yep."

"Oh, this is so exciting! What are the names?" Hermione gave Ron a look and Ron's earned turned a lovely pale pink.

"Ronald didn't seem to like any of the names I did. So right now, our children are the no-name Weasley twins." At that last comment, the elder twins perked up.

"What about Fred and George?" they said in unison.

"No," Hermione snapped.

"But-"

"Why-?"

"No."

"Can I-?"

"No."

"What's-?"

"No."

"Cheese."

"What?"

"Oh, good. We were afraid you couldn't say anything else."

"Get out."

"We still like Fred and George."

"Do you really want a formerly-pregnant witch coming after you with the notion to make you female?" The twins took the hint and kindly left. Hermione sighed and Mrs. Weasley fussed with the pillows.

"Oh, Ronnie dear, why couldn't you go along with one of Hermione's names?"

"Mu-um."

"Hermione, if you ever have a problem, just send him over."

"Thank you, Molly."

"But, really, Ronniekins, just give them names."

"Arthur and Molly," Hermione piped up. It's not as though she loved the names, but she wanted everybody out.

"Well now, Molly!" Mr. Weasley beamed with pride. "That makes two grandchildren named after me."

"That's nice, Arthur. We're going to go check up on Ginny again before leaving." She kissed both new parents before letting out a shrill squeal of excitement.

Hermione watched as everyone left, and heaved a sigh of relief.

"Hermione, why did you just name our children after my parents?"

"I'm bad with names. It's easier this way."

"Did Dad say that he has two grandchildren named after him?"

"I believe so."

"Damn Potters stole our name."

"Bastards."

"Exactly."

-----

Ginny was finally calm. Harry and James left to do paperwork, and she had just had one wonderful hour of sleep. At that moment, her mother blasted through the door.

"Ginny, someone locked us out."

"Can't imagine who, Mum."

"Ron and Hermione have twins. Molly and Arthur."

"Great."

"Now, remember, the baby needs to be breastfed for several months. Or longer, depending. Charlie had to go for nearly a year."

"Ugh. Mum. Horrible mental image."

"I'm just saying."

"Mum, I need sleep."

"Oh, come on now."

"No. I'm tired. You of all people should understand this the best." Mrs. Weasley huffed.

"Fine, be that way. If James is messed up later in life, it's your own fault." Mrs. Weasley stomped out, leaving Ginny to massage her eyebrows and try to sleep.

-----

Four days later, leaving St. Mungo's

-----

"Ginny, how in the hell are we going to handle children?" Hermione was being pushed in a wheel chair by Ron as she held the twins. Ginny was also being pushed by her husband, but she fortunately only had one baby to hold.

"I have no idea. We're basically fucked for the rest of our lives."

"Oh, come on Gin. You're way too cheerful," marked Harry. Ron simply waved off the sarcasm.

"We're not fucked. We're the Golden Trio and the Famous Ginny. Children can't be that hard."

Oh, the sheer idiocy of one Ronald Weasley.

-----

End!

-----

Yeah, I know, the whole story's kind of short, but hey! I think I should get credit for having finished my first full fanfic. That's quite the spiff, especially since I am like the ultimate in ADD poster child.

I may continue with another story. I may not. The summer's winding down, so probably not, but hey. You never know.

Or do you?

You goddamn Legilimens. Stop it!