Tourniquet

I tried to kill the pain

but only brought more

(So much more)

I lay dying


and I'm pouring crimson regret and betrayal

I'm dying, praying, bleeding, and screaming

am I too lost to be saved

am I too lost?

He closed his eyes as his bladed automail almost gently cut through each cell of skin in a line across his wrist. He leaned he head back against the bright, shiny tiled wall. He let out a suffered sigh and opened his eyes to look at the white ceiling. Everything now day's seemed black and white to him. Even the crimson blood that started a small puddle on the flowery tiles. I'm so lost, when did I start doing this? I know it isn't right. He briefly looked at his arm and sighed. He was tired. So tired. He didn't want to do anything. In fact, he sometimes didn't even know if he wanted to be saved from killing himself. The only thing that held him back was Al. Now, Al wasn't even there. Al was dead. Gone. All because of him.

My God my tourniquet

Return to me salvation

My God my tourniquet

Return to me salvation

Al, I'm not a good Nii-san. I'm anything but. I deserve the marks I give myself. I deserve all the problems I go through. It's all of my fault. I don't deserve to live. You should be the one with the body. I'm the one who convinced you to help me try to bring Kaa-san back. It's all my fault. Everyone hates me. Roy, that cold-hearted bastard. No matter how much I love him, he won't care. The only reason I don't tell him I love him is because he picks on me for all the things I've failed at. I failed Kaa-san and you. How could you forgive me? How? Edward felt his eyes close and his body fall onto the floor He no longer had the will to sit up. His mind was starting to fog up from the loss of blood.Soon his mind drifted into unconsciousness, unaware of the man busting open his bathroom door. Unaware of the tears shed for him.

Do you remember me?


Lost for so long


Will you be on the other side?


Or will you forget me?


I'm dying, praying, bleeding, and screaming


Am I to lost to be saved?


Am I too lost?

Roy looked down at the grave. His tears held back, He bit the inside of his lower lip. The brim of his hat hid his red eyes. How couldn't I have noticed? Why didn't I? Roy put a single red rose on the coffin, and then several other colored roses joined the Red one. Yellow, Pink, White, Red-Violet, and Red, all of the roses meaning different things. Roy looked at the sky and saw dark clouds, soon it started to pour. All of the friends Edward had made during his journeys and before that sadly walked away from the grave, but Roy. Roy stood there and watched as they covered up the hole, and Edward's coffin. Tears started to run down Roy's face. Why Edward? Why? Roy stood there in the rain thinking, slowly breaking down. The temptation of shooting himself in the head came alive once more. He slowly walked home.

My God, My tourniquet

Roy opened the door that was Edward's apartment. He was to retrieve all of the items. He saw the blood stain, it wasn't red ; it was now a dried brownish color and sick to look at, on the once white tiles. He walked out of the bathroom and into the bedroom. It all smelled of the late blonde.


Return to me salvation

He saw a picture and silver watch in the dresser that he had just opened, along with a piece of paper. He noticed the sloppy left-handed writing along the paper. It was Ed's. The last thing he probably wrote. The only thing that answered all of his questions. He unfolded the paper and read it carefully.

Dear Colonel.

Yes, You bastard. I knew you'd be the only one to bother looking in here for this because my watch is also there. I'm sorry for all of the troubles I caused. I won't be causing any more... I hope no one cried. I don't deserve it. I've been thinking for a while. I guess it won't matter now, but I love you. I really do and because I loved you, I couldn't live knowing that I'd never be able to love anyone or anything fully anymore. I... It's all my fault that Alphonse died. It was all my fault that he was ever in that damned armor.

I'll tell Al you said 'hi" unless there really is a god and he really did forget me

Love,

Edward "Full Metal" Elric.

Roy's chest was heavy. So heavy it hurt. He dropped the picture, the watch, and the letter. His eyes were filled with tears that fell slowly. He slowly walked to the kitchen.

I JUST WANT TO DIE!

Roy looked at all of the knives in the kitchen. His mind blank, really unsure of what he was doing at the time.

My God My tourniquet

He didn't feel it as he slide the knife from his wrist to the middle of his arm. He didn't feel anything.


Return to me salvation

Roy looked at the ceiling. No one will find me here. No one will need me. I'm useless. I couldn't save Ed. Hell, he's probably calling me a copycat down in hellHe smiled faintly at the thought and closed his eyes for the last time, letting his very soul disappear from the world. I'll see you soon Ed, cause I love you too... I just hope that I won't be denied this time...

My wounds cry for the grave


My soul cries for deliverance


Will I be denied?

Christ

Tourniquet

My suicide

Note: This is yet another Song-fic for Yohie-koi! nn! I hope you liked it! I really do!

Oh! And now Marii-san is doing all of my editing. If I did do any to begin with...

Heh...

I love you, Yohie, and I hope you have a very Happy Birthday!