This is it, the final chapter. If you've made it this far, I thank you. This piece too over a year to write and I greatly appreciate anyone who was patient enough to wait for it. Again, I thank AriesCelestial for the initial idea... it's a far cry from where it started, neh?
Disclaimer: I don't own Shadow Hearts or Koudelka, so legal action would be a total waste!
Chapter 20
The old Ford turned up Petticoat Lane and came to a loud, shuddering halt just down from Old Castle Street. The engine stopped with a bang, smoke billowed out of the bonnet, and soon the young man driving it was storming around the machine and kicking it with damaging intent. But the old truck merely smoked and refused to start.
"Damned stupid piece of shit!" Yuri Hyuga cursed and then stopped himself, looking in through the dingy windshield to see his wife sitting in the passenger seat. "Oops, sorry," he amended with a sigh. He went around the front and opened her door, helping her out with an apologetic grin.
"I guess we'll have to walk," he said and his wife, Alice, smiled warmly, a look of infinite patience in her ice-blue eyes.
"That's all right, I don't mind." She reached in, pulled out the shopping bag from the truck seat, and handed it to Yuri. "Here, carry this for me?"
"Yeah," he said and then offered her his arm. "Walk with me?" he asked, looking down at her with both husbandly and child-like pride. Alice Hyuga nodded and took his arm as they walked their way up the road toward Koudelka's house. The walking was slow, with Alice being very pregnant and Yuri couldn't help wanting to pick her up and carry her himself, but he resisted, especially after that last time.
He had taken her shopping, which in itself was never his strong suit, but they needed things for the baby, and so they had gone into town. Alice had spent hours checking first one small store then another for clothing, nappies, bassinette... all the useless things that mothers always felt a baby needed. By the time she was finished with her shopping, Alice's feet were swollen and walking had become painful and slow and Yuri, playing the attentive father-to-be, became frustrated with the slow pace and took the items to the truck before returning to hoist his wife into the air. He wouldn't have done it if he'd known she was packing; well, truthfully, he would have – but he would have ducked as well. Out of the blue, that little black book of hers came slamming down right into his face, bruising his eyebrow and bending his nose. The whole way to the truck, Alice pummeled him head and shoulders with her little bible and he, being the man, took the punishment. But he never forgot that lessen in wifely dignity and so refrained from the urge to hurry her along.
They turned the corner onto Old Castle Street, passed by Carl's dilapidated old house, and on to Koudelka's home. It too had seen better days, the upper floor windows were still boarded over, but the ground floor now had glass windows with heavy drapes to keep out the chill, and the front door, with its huge, and probably stolen, brass knocker, sported a new coat of paint as well. Eyeing the paint as they turned up the walk, Yuri couldn't help but wonder whose idea the bright yellow had been. Not that he minded yellow, but this yellow was like buttercups – and the only use Yuri ever had for buttercups was gathering them for his wife when they were playing in their backyard. Beside him, Alice was stifling her giggles, knowing full well what Yuri was thinking, and she pointed at the door.
"Sharon, it has to be Sharon," she said.
Yuri rubbed the back of his neck and laughed. "Yeah, yer probably right."
He climbed the three steps to the door and used the knocker, banging hard on the wooden door, making dust fly in the air around him. Alice waived it away, squinting at her husband with a look that said he was behaving quite childish, and a fleeting thought of her foot meeting his shin. Yuri was saved however when the door swung quickly inward revealing a little dark-haired scamp of a girl.
"Sharon," Yuri said with a grin.
The little pig-tailed girl looked up at her giant-sized friend and grinned back at him, pulling the door open the rest of the way.
"Unka Yuri," she squealed and instantly launched herself onto his legs, grabbing them with both arms and holding on tight. "Ride, ride, ride," she chanted and Yuri dropped the shopping bag and pried her arms off one leg in order to stride down the hall, leaving Alice to close the door behind them. Sharon's squeals and giggles preceded them into the family room and the ever-reserved Chris and young Joshua greeted Yuri. Chris was sitting at a small table with cloth and thread stitching repairs onto the children's clothing, while Joshua sat amidst his collection of oddities, laid out on the ratty carpet. He jumped up and joined Sharon on Yuri's legs, and the Alice's husband found himself hauling two children the rest of the way down the hall to the kitchen.
"Help," he called. "Help, somebody bring a crowbar," he called out, the two kids giggling loudly.
At the end of the hall, Halley, his grinning boyish face looking at him from the kitchen door, watched Yuri. But instead of helping with the two hanging baggage, he held open the door and Yuri, with a smirk, shuffled through. In the kitchen Koudelka stood at the stove, an apron wrapped round her middle and her auburn hair tied back with a scarf. On the table were jars and lids and the woman was ladling fruit into the jars on the stove.
"How goes the preserving, Missy?" Yuri asked, which earned him a raised eyebrow.
"Sharon, Joshua, let go of Yuri and go help Chris in the other room; I want to speak to your uncle Yuri alone."
"Ahh do we have to?" chimed two childish voices, then they both let go of Yuri's legs and looked up at him, big grins on their faces.
"Thanks Unka Yuri," Sharon said and then sprinted from the kitchen.
"Yeah, thanks," Joshua echoed and was right behind her.
"Hey! Watch out!" Alice cried from the hallway and in another moment, she joined them in the kitchen.
"You all right?" Halley asked, then "Wow, yer really preggo!"
"Yes," Alice said with a deep blush and she caught sight of Yuri preening silently beside the table. "Not that it took much to do it," she added. Yuri deflated and took off his coat, draping it on a nearby stool before retrieving the bag of gifts.
"We brought stuff," he said gracelessly and set the bag on the floor by the table.
"You didn't have to, you know," Koudelka said, knowing how limited their income was. Yuri had a habit of bringing knickknacks to the children and Alice always managed to find something useful; but their income was no better than hers, although she appreciated the help.
"For the children mostly," Alice said and helped herself to a chair. With a sigh, she sat down and Yuri was instantly there, rubbing her legs and looking like a worried husband. Koudelka stood, hands on hips, watching for a moment, these two friends in her kitchen, and turned back to the stove as a small smile began to worm its way onto her lips. No sense letting them see how happy she was for them: they wouldn't appreciate it anyway.
"How have you been, Koudelka?" Alice finally asked. "Are the younger children doing all right in school?"
Koudelka nodded as she finished ladling and set the jars into a pan to seal.
"Yes, Joshua has taken to his studies and Sharon is coming along," she said, rubbing her hands on her apron. "Chris refuses and I suppose that's all right; she's a bit old for school anyway."
"Yeah, I never went to school and I do all right," Yuri commented from the floor.
"You're a fine example," Koudelka said and her voice dripped humor.
Alice tapped Yuri on his shoulder. "Why don't you help with dinner and I'll take the gifts to the children," she suggested.
"You sure? All right," Yuri got to his feet and helped Alice to hers, handing her the bag before turning to grin at Koudelka.
"Okay, what do you want me to break?"
Dinner that night went well overall. Yuri, in spite of his attempts, did not break anything, and the meal of spaghetti and meat sauce with salad was well received. Yuri's suggestion of noodles had worried Koudelka, especially as the last time they had them Yuri and Halley ended up wearing noodles and the dinning room had been painted in tomato sauce. The competition between her son and Yuri was, at times, uncontrollable. But this time Yuri had been the perfect uncle, regaling the children with stories of his learning to fight at his father's hands, and Halley had lapped up Yuri's humorous First Monster Battles. Halley thought of Yuri as an older brother and wanted to emulate him more than Koudelka would have wished, but Yuri saw things in Halley that reminded him of his own youth, and he seemed to enjoy Halley's company. Besides, it gave her time to be with Alice, as the two women had much to talk about, but most lately, the topic was raising children.
After supper, Yuri corralled Halley and the two of them cleared the table. Alice was biting her lower lip as Yuri tossed plates to Halley and the young man stacked them high, balancing bowls on top. Chris picked up silverware and glasses and led the way to the kitchen, Halley teetering and tottering with the ill balanced load. Halley managed to avoid crashing into the table, and made it around to the sink where Yuri quickly offloaded the dishes and began to run the water; it was a miracle nothing was broken. Alice, breathing a deep sigh, went upstairs to rest while Koudelka went to supervise the three-ring circus in the kitchen.
Halley washed, Koudelka dried, and Yuri cleaned the pots and pans, and when the last dish was washed Halley left, leaving the fusionist alone with his mother. Yuri grinned at Koudelka as he wiped soap off the last pot, rinsing it under the faucet.
"He's not a bad kid," he said.
Koudelka smiled back. "No, and neither are you."
"Hey, I'm no kid!" Yuri exclaimed then laughed. "It's good he's gone though, cuz I got something I wanna ask you an' it's been on my mind lately."
"Oh?"
"Yeah," Yuri said with a shrug and took the towel from Koudelka, drying the pot himself before hanging it from the rack by the stove. He was frowning when he turned back and pointed at the kitchen table with its array of mismatched stools. Koudelka slowly removed her apron and hung it from the peg on the kitchen door before sitting down. She folded her long fingered hands on the kitchen table, the well-used wood rough under her fingers.
"I been having these weird dreams lately, an' it kinda reminded me of when I first met ya," Yuri said and pulled out a stool to sit opposite her. He placed his own hands on the table as well, flat along the wood, the roughened knuckles large and bruised looking even after all this time of not fighting.
"What kind of dreams," Koudelka asked.
"Well, nothing really like that," he said with a laugh and looked at Kuodelka's golden eyes, trying to make light of his feelings, and then realized that this woman never needed to be coddled with humor. "Okay, look, I been dreaming strange stuff, like about China and when we traveled there; back when I first met Alice."
"And?"
Yuri looked down at his rough hands, noticing a hangnail and picking at it slowly while he gathered his thoughts.
"I know that you used to call to me, and tell me this 'n that, and I'd go off and do all sortsa things. An' I remember going to get Alice from the train," he chuckled still picking at his fingers. "How could I not. That first night as she slept by the fire while we were waitin' for the sluice to drain... I had my first meetin' with him."
Koudelka frowned, searching her memory for some illusive person that Yuri might have met back then.
"The sage, Zhuzhen?" she asked.
"No, no," Yuri shook his head and looked up to catch Koudelka's intense expression. "Fox Face – my other half. See, when I first used my power of fusion, my mom had just been killed an' my dad – well he was dead too and I had no idea what was happening or why. I just came awake from the biggest temper tantrum of my life to find my mom dead and me and the house covered in blood – the torn up body parts of the monsters decoratin' the floor. I did that, an' it scared crap outta me." Koudelka did not reply, simply nodded for him to continue.
"Well, I kept having nightmares after that, some loon in my dad's army coat chasin' me all over the place, an' the graveyard in my soul – I'd wake up in a sweat, monster's tryin' to eat me or some shit. And when you started calling to me, it got worse; cuz you was wakin' up something inside of me – making me psychotic like."
Koudelka smiled. "Psychic," she said softly. "Go on."
Yuri grinned at the correction and nodded. "But then that night, in the plains outside of Fengtian, the guy in the coat shows up for real: Fox Face... cuz he was always wearing the fox mask my dad gave me. An' it turns out it was a part of me I hadn't accepted – you know, the part that was strong enough to handle the monster inside."
Yuri looked down again, his fingers now working at a sliver in the tabletop, picking at it a little at a time.
"So you've been dreaming about him again? This fox faced person?"
"Well, see that's the thing. I ain't dreamed about him since then, but now alla sudden he's back. Well, in a strange way. It's like I'm dreaming about what happened back then, only I ain't. Cuz it's me that's wearin' the mask."
They remained silent for a while, Yuri slowly picking at the slivers in the table while Koudelka thought about his words. Yuri had never been good with words or expressing his true feelings; he could state the obvious, and tell just about anyone off in words that would peel paint, but when it came to articulating his thoughts, his feelings, he stumbled. Somewhere in this tale was something he was trying to say, something that bothered him and he didn't know how to tell her.
"You said yourself that Fox Face was a part of you," she said slowly.
"Yeah."
"And that you reconciled with him, when Alice and you met up again, correct? When she took the curse for you."
Yuri nodded. "An' I took the curse back and beat shit outta those masks and that damned Atmo-guy, yeah."
Koudelka smiled. "So is there some unfinished business between you and the masks?"
"Nah," Yuri said, shaking his head and looking up at Koudelka. His eyes were wide and he had the beginnings of a silly grin on his face. "I put those bastards in their place for good," he said.
"Then why are you dreaming this?" she asked.
Yuri snorted, reaching across suddenly and grabbing her hands. "That's what I'm askin' you," he said. "Why am I dreaming this shit alla sudden."
"I don't know Yuri, perhaps you are simply coming into balance with yourself."
"After all this time? Shit." He stayed silent, holding her hands in his, running his thumb around her palms, tracing the lines in her hands like a map, remembering holding her hands, hearing her voice... "Say, Koudelka, you never told me how you knew to call to me back then," he said.
Koudelka remained silent for a long moment then sighed. So that's it – he's remembering. "You told me."
"Huh?" he looked up.
"You don't remember, but – at Nemeton, you told me how I had reached out to you, and spoke to you, guiding you. I waited for you to arrive for a long time."
Yuri looked up into golden eyes and felt his world suddenly swirl. He put a foot down onto the kitchen floor to catch his balance, and grabbed the table ends, suddenly dizzy. He was seeing Fox Face, standing by the tree, knocking Alice down; he was digging his own grave – he was such a coward. He was standing by the tree, striking Alice, he was calling himself names, he was angry for being so stupid as to get stuck in this in the first place... letting Seraphic Radiance have control...
"Holy fucking shit," he muttered, and he laid his head down on the table.
"Yuri?"
The kitchen was spinning on its end and Yuri felt the table tilting and him sliding down, down, down some long dark tunnel. Confused images played in his mind: Alice and him standing on top of Kuihai Tower, she on her knees, panting, and him ready to tear the world apart to save her, to prove to her – to all of them – that he had what it took to conquer a god; rising on the winds of his power, rising higher and higher and finally consuming the god as it consumed him and, like a plaything, realizing he was nothing to this entity. And meeting himself on the hillside of his memories, and fighting his masked self for dominance and winning; standing by the fireplace at Roger's house, hearing about the coming of the alien god and holding two children in his arms, Koudelka sitting beside him and Seraphic Radiance rising above the monastery on wings of power and he, he just a little thing along for the ride. His world was shaking until he realized he'd slid to the floor and Koudelka was kneeling beside him, shaking his shoulder and calling his name.
"Yuri, Yuri, come back," she was saying, and there was worry enough in her that her aura glowed, a nimbus of black fire that made Yuri blink, squinting his eyes.
"I-I'm here," he said, "Stop shaking me."
Koudelka sat back on her heels and looked down at the fusionist with concern in her eyes.
"Are you all right? You suddenly just fell to the floor?" she said.
Yuri pushed himself up onto one elbow and shook his head. "You – everything got crazy for a minute there – I thought you said I told you..."
"I did, and you did," she said and stood, offering him a hand up which he refused as he climbed to his feet.
"I don't get it."
Koudelka rubbed her hands together and went to the stove, filling the kettle with water and lighting the burner before turning back to him, leaning against the stove.
"Let's have tea and we'll try to put this together, shall we?"
"Are you sayin' I really told you about me?" and Koudelka nodded. "But how?"
"I don't know Yuri," she replied and busied herself with getting the cups from the cupboard and fixing tea. When it was done, she brought the steaming cups to the table and sat down again, indicating Yuri should sit as well. He had stood in the center of the room, unmoving, unspeaking, like a statue, watching her every move – like a caged animal, before obeying.
"You want an explanation, but I cannot give you one," she said with a small shrug of her shoulders.
"But I don't... think I remember anything like that."
She waited for a minute then, "What made you faint?"
Yuri looked startled, then looked down at the cup. He'd circled his hands around the small ceramic circle and one thumb was playing idly with the handle, rubbing the sheen on it. With a shrug, he upended the cup, gulping down the hot tea.
"Ah god, that's hot," he breathed and then laughed at himself. "I ... I do dumb things sometimes."
"Including trying to change the subject ... when you started the whole conversation in the first place," Koudelka said.
Guilt stamped on his face, Yuri didn't bother to hide. Guilt and a little fear. "Okay, it's true," he chuckled softly. "It scared me is all. Suddenly I could see Shanghai all over again; and Alice dying and then not dying. An' me getting swallowed up by that god – only I was also the one doing the swallowing." He shook his head. "Fuck me if I know what the hell I'm saying. But I remember seeing you and me in Wales and me holding..." suddenly he thought better of saying the next words and he froze, looking horrified at the gypsy woman across from him.
"Um, never mind," he finished.
Koudelka looked intently at Yuri, the gypsy woman knew he was bothered by his sudden vision, but at the same time avoiding talking about it. It made her smile slightly, as it reminded her of before – how brash he was, yet how vulnerable as well.
"All you ever said was that you had been at Nemeton before, that I had somehow called you out of your darkness, and brought you into the light; to help people, to save people, to save Alice and, ultimately, to save the world. I never understood what you meant, and you were not capable of telling me. I don't know how you got there or how you left," she said, avoiding the mention of Roger and his strange machines."
Yuri looked at her, puzzled and confused, and wanting so much to figure out the strangeness of his vision, when he suddenly shook his head and sighed.
"Ya know what? I have had so much weird shit happen to me in my life, that I should just chalk this up to more of the same. I think something happened – I don't know exactly what, it's all confused in here," and he reached up, tapping his forehead. "An' maybe you know an' maybe you don't know. But I figure whatever it was, it ain't gonna hurt me not to know." Quickly he reached out and took Koudelka's hand. "If you tell me I told ya sometime ago, to call me out of China, well then, I must have. I'll believe ya, cuz I trust you."
The stool scraped loudly on the floor when he rose and he walked around the table, pausing at her side and Koudelka looked up into amber eyes before rising to accept his embrace. His arms enfolded her and she held him close, the beat of his heart strong in her ears before he let her go.
"I'm gonna check on Alice," he said and left the kitchen.
Koudelka watched him go and wondered what she had just missed; and if missing it would be a bad thing.
Yuri took the stairs to the upstairs guestroom two at a time, pausing at the door just long enough to kick off his boots and leave them just inside the door. The room was dim, Alice having lowered the shades and the streetlamp outside cast odd shadows on the blinds. On the lumpy bed was a bigger lump that Yuri knew would be Alice, and he tiptoed around the end of the bed to kneel at her side. One delicate hand hung limp and white from beneath the blanket, while the other one was tucked beneath her cheek, her lips barely parted as she breathed deeply in sleep. On his knees at her side, he leaned against the bed and touched the rounded mound of the blanket. She stirred slightly, moving her legs and one foot slid out from under the covers. Yuri smiled and captured the stockinged foot in his hands, gently pinching the toes; Alice moaned slightly, and tried to move her foot away.
Yuri smiled and climbed onto the bed, nestling close to Alice, putting one arm over her hip and around her belly. His fingers splayed wide, possessing her, and he nuzzled his chin close to her hair, breathing in her delicate perfume and the lingering aroma of pasta sauce. He let his eyes close and the closeness of her, whom he loved, lull him to sleep.
Sirens in the distance woke Yuri up after midnight and he looked around the darkened room. Next to him, the mounded blanket rose and fell with his wife's breathing and he bent down to nuzzle her beneath her hair. The smell of pasta sauce lingered still and he kissed her neck before rolling off the bed. Shoeless he crossed the floor, pulling up the sash and looking out over the street below. The street lamp was a wan yellow, flickering slightly before going completely dark, and Yuri looked up to see the lights going out around the neighborhood. The sirens wailing in the distance were warnings of the impending attacks from across the Channel, and Yuri strained to catch sight of any zeppelins above in the dark. Shadows moved around below with the night patrol and he moved back, pulling closed the curtains before turning back into the room.
It was a pity, he thought, that he couldn't do more to safeguard his adopted home, but he was one man and he doubted even using his fusions he would be able to stop the armies fighting across the channel in France and Belgium. The war raged on, and Yuri did his best to bring comfort and security to both his own wife, and to Koudelka and her kids; their aborted plans to go to America coming to an end at the start of the war. Each time they saw him, Halley had ideas about enlisting and each time Koudelka told him to wait. Yuri thought that was a pretty sensible thing over all, but doubted Halley would wait much longer – fighting and glory awaited any young man who went to war... at least, that's what the songs said. Yuri snorted and crossed back to the bed. Imagine thinking about war when he had a delectable confection lying beneath the blankets. I'd much rather nibble on her than think about combat, he thought.
He climbed back onto the lumpy bed and snuggled close to his wife, wishing she'd wake up so he could enjoy a little footsy with her. Smiling he pulled back the blanket and put his face to her breasts, those soft deliciously sensual breasts which gave so warmly beneath his chin, collapsing into her chest and breaking open to ooze rotten fluids and worms. Pulling back he watched as her body turned putrescent, blackening, her delicate lips pulling back in a rictus grin. One hand touched her swollen belly, pushing through as the flesh collapsed, plunging into the mire that had been her pregnancy. He pulled free suddenly, something moist and squirmy attached to his hand, the baby came with him, half-rotten, desiccated and malformed, and Yuri screamed, throwing himself off the bed. He reached the door and yanked it open, his screams echoing down the hall. Blindly he ran for the stairs and met Halley coming up.
Halley heard Yuri's scream and thought the older man was having nightmares again; he knew it happened occasionally, when he and Alice visited... sometimes more than once. The young magic user wondered what brought on these horrible dreams, but Yuri himself never commented. Now, however, now the wailing scream was louder than usual, and Halley left his warm bed, climbing the stairs in his bare feet. He met up with Yuri as he was plunging down the corridor and, without thinking, bunched up his fist and cold cocked him as he hit the stairs. Yuri stopped, dizzy, and sat down hard on the floor.
"What the fuck?" he looked up as Halley moved up and sat next to him. "Did you just hit me?" he asked.
Halley nodded. "You were screaming your fool head off. Didn't want you to disturb the kids," he said.
Yuri rubbed his jaw, looking aside at the younger man. Halley had grown up a lot these last months; still a teenager, he had put on inches and now came up to Yuri's shoulder. He'd filled out some in the chest too, and Yuri thought he'd turn out a fine fighter one day... if Yuri didn't kill him first.
"What am I doin' in the hall?" he asked.
Halley shrugged. "Having a nightmare, I figure. Or fighting a fusion soul or - just bein' an ass."
Yuri smirked, threatening to punch the London Rat and the two traded mock blows while Yuri tried to make sense of what had happened. He was sleeping, next to Alice. And then... he woke up and saw his beautiful wife...
"Ah fuck, Alice!" he exclaimed and, scrambling to his feet, ran back down the hall to the bedroom. He crashed through the door and ran to the bed, falling to his knees even as he grabbed the blanket and swept it away. There, lying curled much as he had left her, was Alice, her breathing was slow and her eyelids flickered in dreams.
"Oh thank god," he groaned and put his head on her belly, his arms gathering her in to his embrace.
Finding herself suddenly smothered, Alice came awake with a start, her stocking-clad feet kicking out and her hands slapping at whatever was holding her. Yuri ignored it, and simply pulled her gently toward him, muttering endearments.
"Yuri? What – what is it? Is everything all right?" Alice asked, once her initial panic had subsided and she realized that the unyielding bands were Yuri's muscular arms.
Yuri looked up into Alice's face, her eyes bright in the darkness, their internal light glowing. "I had a bad dream is all," he said, his chest tight and his voice tighter.
"Well," she pushed against him, "that's all well, but I can't breath. Let me up."
Yuri quickly released her and Alice did a quick tuck and tug on her clothing, pulling her legs free of the blanket and standing up. Her stockings fell down around her ankles and she leaned on Yuri's shoulder, letting him remove them.
"Be careful; they're hard to replace with the war and all," she said but then nodded when he carefully folded them and put them on the bedside table.
"Are you feeling all right?" he asked and Alice nodded. "Just let me sit in the chair. May we have some light?" she asked as she settled in the chair by the window.
"Nah, there's sirens outside. But I can pull open the curtains," and he did, letting in starlight to dance on the ratty carpet, before kneeling at her feet. "Let me," he said and lifted up one foot, began to gently rub the toes and arch.
Alice wiggled her toes and sighed.
"Oh, that feels wonderful. You really can be so sweet when you want to be," she said and let the silence remain as he finished the one foot and moved on to the other. Finally she asked, "Why were you holding me so tightly before? Did something happen?"
Yuri shook his head, keeping it down so his eyes were hidden.
"Nah, I just… wanted to hold you."
"Is that why Halley stood at our door for five minutes then? Because you wanted to hold me?"
Yuri looked up and caught her smile reflected in the starlight.
"Oh, you saw then."
"Yes."
Yuri sighed and sat back on his heels. "I had a bad dream is all." Alice didn't reply, waiting instead for her husband to continue. He looked up through his lashes, catching her patient expression. Man, she is so beautiful, an' so patient with me. I don't deserve her sometimes, he thought and fought the urge to hide behind an idiotic joke. "I had a bad dream an' I woke up screamin' in the hall. Halley an' me – we talked is all."
Alice nodded once, looking down at her disheveled husband. He had the shadowed look that told her he was hiding something, and was reluctant to tell her. "What did you dream?"
He waived one hand in front of his face, "Nothing really – well, nothing good. I don't wanna disturb you with it."
"Tell me," she said and reached out, taking hold of one battle-roughened hand and holding it in her soft palm.
There were times he wished Alice weren't insistent and this was one of them. But he took a deep breath and briefly told her of his dream. "It's not just the dream though, babe, it's that it reminds me of something. I had a talk with Koudelka while you were napping and something she said – about how she knew to talk to me in China..." he shook his head. The visions he had in the kitchen, the nightmare he had in the lumpy bed... he felt they were related. He didn't know how, and he seldom gave thought to his weird dreams – he had nightmares since he was a kid – but these, these were all related to him and Alice. Nothing will hurt my Alice, he thought. I'll protect her.
"I asked her how she knew to talk to me," he said. "An' she said I told her to... and then I suddenly got all dizzy and stuff started spinning around. I saw China again, and Shanghai an' I got dizzy with how it was moving and changin' around. And when it stopped, it really freaked me out. But then I had that dream and I thought I lost you and…" he stopped and reached up to her stomach, caressing the happy swelling with his hand.
Alice understood suddenly and reached out to run her fingers through his hair, pulling gently until he leaned forward, putting his cheek to her belly. She stroked his head, letting her finger trail down his neck and around his ears, and she could feel him relax, his arms snaking around her legs and he softly hummed, as if singing to her.
"I will never leave you, Yuri," she said softly and when he nodded, rubbing his face over her stomach, she had sudden inspiration. "We should decide what to name the baby."
"Ah, you can do that," he said to her stomach, and she laughed softly.
"All right, how about Ben," she began and he sat up with a start, grinning.
"You wouldn't dare," he said and laughed.
"Well, why don't you name him then," Alice suggested and watched in amazement as he put his face to her belly once more, his eyes open and dreamy. He remained there for long silent minutes, breathing and listening to her belly, hearing her heart beating so softly. She touched one tousled bang near his eyes and looked in startled wonder as his eyes shifted from amber to red and back, the focus gone for a brief moment before returning.
What did he see, she wondered.
"Yeah," he said finally, his voice soft. "I can do that," and he kissed her prominent stomach. "She's gonna be a beautiful girl. Katie. Her name is Katie," he said and Alice gasped, sensing beneath his words the ring of truth. He truly knew the child would be born female.
"Katie," she agreed.