Sorry it's been so long with this story. Anyway, so here is chapter 22.
Faith quickly closed the bathroom door and locked it. Stood there a moment, leaning against the door. She slowly moved away and turned on the shower. She took off all of her clothes slowly and put them to the side on the floor. She stepped into the shower and closed the shower door. She sat on the floor with her back to one of the walls and her knees in front of her. She just starred off in front of her. She remembered the kiss perfectly. It wasn't a simple friendly kiss. It was passionate. Tears were streaming down her face by this point. But she didn't make a noise. Angel would hear her; if it wasn't for that she would be sobbing hysterically. She couldn't make the tears stop coming.
Angel looked ahead of him in a slight state of shock. How.....did this happen? He didn't even have to ask that he knew. He remembered it all. In the bar. He had been thinking about being with her. Asking himself if he wanted her, loved her. 'I've seen the way you look at her.' Well his question was answered. He could say that it was because he drank to much, he couldn't think straight, but that would be pointless. The way he had been feeling, the way he had been acting, the dreams, and this. He couldn't deny it. Even for himself. He wanted to kiss her again. He wanted to be with her badly. What about Faith though? He'd seen her face before she closed the door behind her. She looked completely horrified. That hurt. Not that it was Faith's fault, she just......what did she think?
He still sat there. What surprised him the most was that he wasn't surprised, about any of this. He knew how he felt long ago even if he was in denial. When did it happen though? At what point? He thought about those months ago, he had gone out for a walk to find her being attacked in an ally. He had gone to help her. She pushed him away with a surprising amount of strength then he staked it. He turned around to see her on the ground. He remembered his first thought was how beautiful she was. Was it then? When he brought her to the hotel, she had fallen asleep on the couch while he was telling the other about her. When they left he picked her up to carry her up stairs and she nuzzled into his chest. He remembered his smile. Was it then? When leaned up against him on the stairs in her drunken state and he held her. Was it then? When they were talking while eating Chinese food in the lobby? He didn't know. It was either when or soon after he meets her. He remembered how jealous he got when Ryan first showed up at his door step telling him that Faith had been his fiancé.
He hated the fact anyone could be, or could have been closer to Faith then he was. He loved her. It was obvious for so long. If anyone at all found out he loved Faith, she would be in more danger then ever before. It didn't matter if she felt the same or not. She was in danger right now he realized. But what could he do? He loved her; you can't just stop an emotion. He couldn't leave; she and their friends would follow. They wouldn't let him be alone again. He couldn't ask her to leave. She had been thrown away by so many people she cared about; he didn't want to be another one. And there was one fatal flaw in all these plans. He couldn't be without her. He didn't know how he could go a day without her. He would miss her voice her laugh every move she made too much. He would miss watching her, listening to her, talking to her. She was......his addiction. Cordelia's words once again. It was what she said after she had spoken those repetitive words.
I've seen the way you look at her Angel. She's your addiction!
She'd known since the beginning hadn't she. Cordelia, the watchful one. The one that always knew what was happening around her. She'd known what he had tried to ignore. His beautiful Faith. Only she would never be his. He felt that pain again. Maybe it was best that she didn't feel the same way. What could he give her? What if she did love him? He wanted that so badly. He could hear the shower in the bathroom. Faith remembered the kiss didn't she. Was she going to avoid him? He could say it was because they were both drunk. She didn't have to know. She wouldn't have to know or find out. He loved her, it would be his secret.
Faith felt the tears run down her face. How could this happen? She was attracted to him but that didn't have to mean she loved him. She didn't love him. She didn't want to. If she loved him she would be hurt. Either right away or eventually. If she loved him she already loved him more then she ever loved Ryan and losing him had been painful enough for her to die. What would it be like if Angel left. She couldn't imagine that. He'd leave her eventually. Who was she kidding?! Why be with her in the first place? He knew how stupid she'd been, falling so easily for Ryan. He knew she slept with a vast amount of men. Why want to be with her? It would be better if she just kept it too herself. She couldn't let anyone know. In the other room she heard the door open and close. Angel must have left the room. Maybe he didn't even remember what happened last night. They had both been drunk not to mention half asleep. It would be better not to say a word about it. She could love him just not let him or anyone else know.
I'm SO sorry that it's been so long to update for this story. With school and other things coming up soon I've been busy, but I'll try to update more.
Faith quickly closed the bathroom door and locked it. Stood there a moment, leaning against the door. She slowly moved away and turned on the shower. She took off all of her clothes slowly and put them to the side on the floor. She stepped into the shower and closed the shower door. She sat on the floor with her back to one of the walls and her knees in front of her. She just starred off in front of her. She remembered the kiss perfectly. It wasn't a simple friendly kiss. It was passionate. Tears were streaming down her face by this point. But she didn't make a noise. Angel would hear her; if it wasn't for that she would be sobbing hysterically. She couldn't make the tears stop coming.
Angel looked ahead of him in a slight state of shock. How.....did this happen? He didn't even have to ask that he knew. He remembered it all. In the bar. He had been thinking about being with her. Asking himself if he wanted her, loved her. 'I've seen the way you look at her.' Well his question was answered. He could say that it was because he drank to much, he couldn't think straight, but that would be pointless. The way he had been feeling, the way he had been acting, the dreams, and this. He couldn't deny it. Even for himself. He wanted to kiss her again. He wanted to be with her badly. What about Faith though? He'd seen her face before she closed the door behind her. She looked completely horrified. That hurt. Not that it was Faith's fault, she just......what did she think?
He still sat there. What surprised him the most was that he wasn't surprised, about any of this. He knew how he felt long ago even if he was in denial. When did it happen though? At what point? He thought about those months ago, he had gone out for a walk to find her being attacked in an ally. He had gone to help her. She pushed him away with a surprising amount of strength then he staked it. He turned around to see her on the ground. He remembered his first thought was how beautiful she was. Was it then? When he brought her to the hotel, she had fallen asleep on the couch while he was telling the other about her. When they left he picked her up to carry her up stairs and she nuzzled into his chest. He remembered his smile. Was it then? When leaned up against him on the stairs in her drunken state and he held her. Was it then? When they were talking while eating Chinese food in the lobby? He didn't know. It was either when or soon after he meets her. He remembered how jealous he got when Ryan first showed up at his door step telling him that Faith had been his fiancé.
He hated the fact anyone could be, or could have been closer to Faith then he was. He loved her. It was obvious for so long. If anyone at all found out he loved Faith, she would be in more danger then ever before. It didn't matter if she felt the same or not. She was in danger right now he realized. But what could he do? He loved her; you can't just stop an emotion. He couldn't leave; she and their friends would follow. They wouldn't let him be alone again. He couldn't ask her to leave. She had been thrown away by so many people she cared about; he didn't want to be another one. And there was one fatal flaw in all these plans. He couldn't be without her. He didn't know how he could go a day without her. He would miss her voice her laugh every move she made too much. He would miss watching her, listening to her, talking to her. She was......his addiction. Cordelia's words once again. It was what she said after she had spoken those repetitive words.
I've seen the way you look at her Angel. She's your addiction!
She'd known since the beginning hadn't she. Cordelia, the watchful one. The one that always knew what was happening around her. She'd known what he had tried to ignore. His beautiful Faith. Only she would never be his. He felt that pain again. Maybe it was best that she didn't feel the same way. What could he give her? What if she did love him? He wanted that so badly. He could hear the shower in the bathroom. Faith remembered the kiss didn't she. Was she going to avoid him? He could say it was because they were both drunk. She didn't have to know. She wouldn't have to know or find out. He loved her, it would be his secret.
Faith felt the tears run down her face. How could this happen? She was attracted to him but that didn't have to mean she loved him. She didn't love him. She didn't want to. If she loved him she would be hurt. Either right away or eventually. If she loved him she already loved him more then she ever loved Ryan and losing him had been painful enough for her to die. What would it be like if Angel left. She couldn't imagine that. He'd leave her eventually. Who was she kidding?! Why be with her in the first place? He knew how stupid she'd been, falling so easily for Ryan. He knew she slept with a vast amount of men. Why want to be with her? It would be better if she just kept it too herself. She couldn't let anyone know. In the other room she heard the door open and close. Angel must have left the room. Maybe he didn't even remember what happened last night. They had both been drunk not to mention half asleep. It would be better not to say a word about it. She could love him just not let him or anyone else know.
I'm SO sorry that it's been so long to update for this story. With school and other things coming up soon I've been busy, but I'll try to update more.