A/N: I've gotten lots of questions about Sirius and Olivia. All I'm going to give away is that you should expect a lot of drama! I hope you'll like it!

Thanks for reading and reviewing! The next update will be on 4 March.

I don't own Harry Potter.

Strained Relations

Believe it or not, everyone have things that hide

Believe it or not, everyone keep most things inside
Believe it or not, everyone believe in something above
Believe it or not, everyone need to feel loved
- Believe it or not, Nickelback

"Peter, we need to talk."

"Yes, my Lord?" Peter asked, standing before the Dark Lord's desk in his office.

Voldemort leaned back in his chair. "You have been very valuable in telling me of Dumbledore's plans. You have always told me what he knows and what he does not. However, this information that you have so willingly given - it is not enough."

"What more can I give you?" Peter asked nervously. "I can't know what is going through Dumbledore's mind."

"No," Voldemort conceded. "But you can tell me who it is that works with him."

Peter's eyes widened. Was the Dark Lord asking what he thought he was?

"I want to know who is fighting with him, Peter," Voldemort said softly. "I want specific names, and I want them all. You may begin when you are ready."

"I – I –" Peter began to shake. He couldn't tell him. He couldn't sell out his friends like that. He couldn't.

"I'm going to find out one way or another, Pettigrew," Voldemort said viciously. "If you choose not to tell me, I will simply take the names from your pathetic mind. You will be punished, of course, for not divulging the information I required, but I will still have the information. Which will it be, then? Will you tell me of your own accord, or shall I take the names by force?"

Peter gritted his teeth. There was only one choice.

"Well?"

Peter drew a deep breath. "Can I have a quill and parchment to write them down?"

Voldemort smiled. "Wise decision, Peter. Very wise."

"ALEXANDER!"

Olivia stopped dead in her tracks and turned around. Moody was coming toward her, looking like a man on a mission.

"I need a word," he said, pointing at his open office door.

Olivia nodded, glad for the excuse to procrastinate. She hated filing, the task that she had been assigned for the afternoon. Really, she hated all the office work she had been assigned since becoming an Auror. Any reason to put it off was a good one. She followed Moody into his office without protest.

"Have a seat," he said, shutting the door behind her.

Olivia obediently sat down, and waited for Moody to break the silence. He crossed the room, and sat down across from her at his desk.

"You, my dear, have done very well for us thus far," he began.

"Thank you," Olivia said, surprised that he had called her in to compliment her.

"I don't just mean since your induction to the Auror department," Moody continued. "I'm talking about the work you did for us during your training – both aspects of what you've done."

Olivia nodded, knowing that he was referring to her work with the Order. "Thank you, sir."

Moody nodded. "Our first year Aurors are all required to do six months of desk work, but I think it's time to make an exception to the rule. With all that's happening right now, I can't let a gifted Auror like you sit in this office, doing work at a desk. I'm sending you out in the field."

Olivia's eyes widened. "That would be great," she said quickly. "I'd far rather be out fighting than in here."

Moody nodded again. "I had assumed you'd say that. There is something I need to tell you before you begin, though."

"What's that?"

"All our field Aurors work with a partner. You know by now that it's not safe to go into a battle situation alone."

"Yes," she agreed. They had discussed this at length in all their training classes, and she had seen the importance of having a partner firsthand in her work for the Order. Her only remaining question was who her partner would be.

"We assign each Auror a partner," Moody continued. "The teams work together for a year. We base our teams on our knowledge of the members' abilities to work together as Aurors, but not necessarily as friends. In your case, we've made a choice that we think will work well, despite the initial difficulties you may encounter."

"Who will my partner be?" she asked, her curiosity getting the best of her. She hoped that it wasn't Lucas, one of the other new Aurors. He always looked at her as though she was a piece of meat, or a prize to be won. She could handle anyone but him.

"You will work with Mr. Black," Moody said firmly.

Olivia just managed to stop her jaw from dropping. Maybe anyone but Lucas was a bit much. Was Moody mental? "Sirius?" she asked faintly.

"The very same." Moody studied her for a moment. "You and Mr. Black are the only new Aurors we are going to allow in the field. Based on your intense training, you are the only two who are ready."

"Right," Olivia said, her voice still a bit strangled.

"I know that you and Mr. Black have certain . . . issues . . . standing between you. Now is the time to get past them. You have been a damn good team in battle situations in the past. I expect nothing less now."

"But . . ."

"You have a problem with my decision?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No," Olivia said quickly. "It's not a problem at all."

"Good. You and Mr. Black will receive your first assignment next week. Until then, continue with your office work. Oh, and don't mention this to anyone else who was inducted with you. I don't need thirteen new Aurors in my office, begging me to put them in the field."

Olivia couldn't help smiling. "Yes, sir."

"Go ahead and make copies or whatever menial task they've assigned you." Moody looked down at his desk, and shifted some parchment around.

Olivia grinned, and rose from her chair. "Thank you, sir, for giving me this chance."

Moody looked up from the parchment scattered across his desk. "I know you'll succeed."

Olivia nodded, and made her way into the corridor. Once Moody's office door was closed behind her, she leaned back against the wall, exhaling deeply.

"My partner is Sirius," she whispered, closing her eyes. "How could Moody do this to us?"

"You have been a damn good team in battle situations in the past. I expect nothing less now."

Moody was right – she and Sirius had worked well together in the past. But they hadn't been required to work together since they had broken up; in reality, they had avoided it. Could they still work together? She knew that she still trusted Sirius to defend her life in a battle situation, and knew that she would defend his just as tenaciously as he would hers. She nodded. If they worked at it, and didn't let their romantic past interfere in their professional lives, they could indeed live up to Moody's expectations.

She knew that she had to talk to Sirius about their new partnership. She couldn't very well wait until they received their first mission to begin talking to him again. The problem was going to be finding him, and then getting him alone. She collected herself, and then began to wander around the offices searching for a man whose schedule she didn't even know. How was she ever going to find him?

"Hey, Livie."

Olivia grinned as she saw her brother coming toward her. "Hi, John. What's up?"

"Working, as usual," he said. "How's the desk work treating you?"

She made a face. "Could we please refrain from talking about that?"

He laughed. "I got pretty much the same reaction from Sirius in our meeting yesterday."

"Oh, that's right! I forgot that you're his mentor."

John nodded, but didn't comment.

Olivia bit her lip, hating that she was about to ask this of her brother. She knew that he wanted her to stay as far away from her former boyfriend as possible. "I'm actually looking for Sirius. Do you know where he is right now?"

"I think he was headed back to his office the last time I saw him," John said with a slight frown. "Why are you looking for him?"

"Moody just told me the two of us are going to need to work together on something, and I wanted to talk to him about it."

John's frown deepened. "Moody is assigning the two of you to work together?"

"Yes."

He shook his head. "You don't have to. I'll talk to Moody for you."

"No, John, don't do that!" Olivia exclaimed.

"You want to work with him?" he asked incredulously.

"Yes – no," she stumbled over her words, and sighed. "Look, I just don't want you babying me while we're here working together. Don't act like my big brother for once. Just let me handle this on my own. If Moody wants me to work with Sirius, then I'll work with him."

"I don't know, Livie," John said, shaking his head. "I don't think you should have to go through this. What is Moody making you do with him?"

Olivia shrugged. "He didn't tell me yet."

John sighed. "You're sure you don't want me to talk to Moody for you?"

"I'm positive."

"All right. I can't say that I like it, but if it's what you want . . ."

"Thanks, John," she smiled. "Oh, and don't say anything to Mum and Dad. They're worried enough over me being an Auror without knowing that I'm going to work with Sirius on some project."

"You've got that right," John grinned. "All right, I'll keep your secret. But you owe me."

"Free babysitting for a month," she promised with a grin.

"Great," John grinned. "You can start on Friday."

"Er – Friday's bad for me."

He raised his eyebrows. "And just what plans do you have?"

"I have a date." Olivia could barely keep the beaming smile from her face as she said the words.

"With who?" John asked, his eyebrows shooting up even higher.

"Greg Wilson. We went to Hogwarts together."

John smiled, obviously pleased. "That's great! I hope you have a good time."

"I'm sure I will."

He glanced at his watch. "Sorry, Livie, but I have a meeting with my partner in about thirty seconds. We'll talk later, okay?"

"Sure."

Olivia watched her brother walk off, then turned around. Maybe if she hurried, she could catch Sirius before he left the broom closet he called an office.

"So, did you find any . . . creative uses . . . for the chocolate, then?"

Sirius grinned at Lucas Patterson, one of the two other Aurors he shared an office with. Despite the fact that Lucas wasn't his favorite of the new Aurors, he was there, and Sirius desperately needed to talk to someone about his activities of the prior evening. He had just finished recounting the evening spent with Rebecca, much to the other man's delight.

"No, the chocolate was just the jumping off point, if you will," Sirius replied. "Although that could be a fun idea for another night."

"Definitely," Lucas grinned. "I have to say, Sirius, you have the best luck with the ladies. First you had Olivia, who is gorgeous and has a body that makes me want to cry, then you had Patricia offering you meaningless shagging, and now you have this little doll. How do you do it?"

Sirius smiled, although for some reason the comments about his girlfriends – both past and present – sent a bit of anger through him. He hated the way Lucas viewed women. "It's my overall attractiveness, I'd say. They can't resist me."

Lucas laughed. "No advice for your office buddy?"

"Sorry, my friend. Some of us have it, and some don't."

Lucas laughed again as a knock sounded on the door, cutting off the conversation. Sirius looked at Lucas.

"Were you expecting company?"

"No," Lucas replied with a shrug. "Come in!"

Olivia opened the door, and stepped into the office. "Sirius, can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Sure," Sirius said, his eyes widening slightly. He was sure he knew what this was about, which meant that Lucas couldn't be a part of their conversation. "Lucas, do you mind ?"

"Not at all," Lucas said cheerfully. "I'm sure someone will find work for me as soon as I set foot outside the office." He passed very close to Olivia, which wasn't entirely inappropriate given their close quarters – but wasn't exactly appropriate, either. "Nice seeing you, Alexander."

She gave him a warning look. "You, too, Patterson."

When the door was closed behind him, she took his vacant seat. "I just talked to Moody," she said without preamble.

Sirius grabbed his wand, and put a silencing charm on the office. "Yeah, he talked to me yesterday. It looks like we're partners again."

"Do you think we can do it?"

"I think we certainly have the ability," Sirius said. "But in terms of our relationship . . . Well, this is going to force us to be civil again." He gave her a sarcastic smile. "So, I guess that means you're going to have to talk to me again."

"We have been civil," Olivia snapped. "And to suggest that I haven't talk to you – that's ridiculous! Think of all the times we've been together with our friends – think of everything that's happened to throw us together – we were both there for James when his dad died –"

"Olivia," Sirius said sharply, holding up his hand to stop the flow of words. He sighed. "We haven't even been together in this room for five minutes, and we're already getting short with one another. Do you honestly think this isn't going to be difficult for us? Moody has given us a challenging task on top of the missions we'll be assigned."

Olivia drew a deep breath. "I don't know why he did this to us."

"He wants us to work out our differences," Sirius said. "Or maybe he doesn't care. Aurors aren't supposed to show emotion, remember? Maybe this is a way of teaching us not to let our emotions interfere with our work."

Olivia exhaled. "This is going to be tough, Sirius."

"Only if we let it," he replied. "We're both at fault, so we're both going to have to work to fix this. We were friends far longer than we were dating, Liv. Do you think we can go back to that? Do you think we can be friends again?"

Not if you keep looking at me with those eyes, she thought. She had forgotten how easy it was to lose herself in his eyes. "Yes," she said out loud, struggling to keep her emotions in check. "At least, I think we can trust one another again in our work."

"You don't trust me in other aspects?"

"I trust you with my life," Olivia said simply. "Isn't that enough?"

Sirius nodded slowly. You once trusted me with your heart, and now just your life is supposed to be good enough? "Yes," he said aloud, keeping the sorrow out of his voice. "I trust you with my life, too."

"Good." She swung the chair from side to side. "What do we do now?"

"We wait," Sirius said simply. "We can't act until we have our orders from Moody."

Olivia nodded, and rose to her feet. "I guess I'll let your roommate come back in, then."

Sirius grinned. "He's probably got his ear pressed to the door, trying to hear we're doing now that we're alone."

Olivia shook her head. "Pervert."

"Yes, he is."

She laughed, and nodded. "I'll see you around."

"Right," Sirius replied, wondering if he was disappointed by the briefness of their encounter.

Olivia stopped with her hand on the doorknob, and turned around. "Sirius?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm glad we're working together," she said softly. "There's no other Auror I'd trust with my life the way I trust you."

Sirius exhaled as she closed the door softly behind her, and ran his hand through his hair. Even after all that had happened between them, he was still attracted to her. Lucas, although blunt and harsh, was right. Olivia was one of the most attractive women he knew. He was going to have to work very hard to keep his emotions under control while they worked together. Aside from their history and his present relationship with Rebecca, his career was also at stake. He had to make sure his conduct was nothing other than professional.

"Besides, think of Rebecca," he muttered. "She's a great girl, and you can't hurt her like that. Keep thinking of her, and you'll be fine." He grinned as a mental picture of his girlfriend crossed his mind. "Just keep thinking about last night."

Olivia made it back to her own office, which was mercifully empty. She closed the door behind her, and sat down at her desk, burying her face in her hands. How could he still affect her like that? How could she allow him to affect her like that? She sighed. She had to move on – and that's exactly what Friday night was about.

"He doesn't love you anymore," she muttered to herself. "Get yourself under control. Compartmentalize. You have a working relationship with Sirius, difficult though it may be. Your romantic relationship is about to start with Greg. Focus on him."

She nodded to herself, and stood up. She had some filing she had to do.

The remaining days of the week passed quickly, and Friday arrived before Olivia was really ready. She had the day off work, which was probably a good thing, considering how jumpy she was.

Halfway through the day, she was ready to Apparate to the Canary Islands to find Lily. She desperately needed to talk to a friend, but there were none to be found. Lily was still away for her romantic week with James; Dana, who was still in Healer training, was unreachable during class hours; and Laura was in court, serving as the junior prosecutor in a Death Eater case. Olivia was on her own to keep herself calm during this long, nerve-wracking day.

Finally, the clock assured her that she could begin getting ready for her date without being ridiculously early. A long shower helped to calm her nerves; once she was clean, she spent an almost disturbing amount of time choosing her clothing. After trying on ten different outfits, she settled on her favorite black shirt with a denim skirt and black heels. She fussed with her hair and makeup until they were just right. Then, picking up her black purse, she Apparated to Hogsmeade.

She arrived at the Three Broomsticks just as Greg did. His face lit up as he saw her approaching.

"Hey," he grinned. "You look fantastic."

"Thanks," she said with a smile. "So do you."

He laughed. "You don't need to compliment guys, you know."

"I'm saying it because it's true," she replied.

He laughed again. "Come on, let's go in."

"All right."

He held the door open, letting her pass before him. Madam Rosmerta was working that evening, and promptly showed them to a table. She looked surprised to see Olivia with someone who wasn't Sirius, but refrained from commenting.

"I'll take care of you myself," she said with a smile, handing each of them a menu. "How are your friends, Olivia?"

"Fine," she replied with a smile. "You know that James is working at Hogwarts now, right?"

"Yes, he comes in every once in a while after work," she smiled. "Well, he hasn't been in since . . . It is a terrible shame about his father, isn't it? How is he?"

Olivia smiled sadly. "He's handling it as well as he can. He and Lily are in the Canary Islands right now."

"Good," Madam Rosmerta replied. "He needed to get away for a bit." She smiled again. "Well, I'll give you a minute to look over the menu, then I'll be back to take your order."

Olivia smiled at Greg as Madam Rosmerta left, and opened her menu. He looked at her with a slight frown.

"You know her?"

"Yes," Olivia smiled. "A few of my friends got to know her very well when we were at Hogwarts. She's always given us all special treatment because of them."

"If I had known that, I would have befriended her long ago," Greg said with an exaggerated sigh. "This James you mentioned – is that James Potter?"

"Yes."

"His father was Harold Potter, then?"

"You heard about that?"

He nodded. "I work in the Ministry, remember? It was all anyone could talk about for awhile. Everyone was stunned that such a phenomenal Auror was killed."

Olivia nodded. "We were all pretty shocked by it. James is starting to heal now, though, so that's a good thing."

He looked at her for a moment, recognizing the sorrow in her eyes. "I'm sorry. We don't need to talk about this now."

She smiled gratefully. "Thanks."

He smiled, and looked down at the menu, searching for a new subject. "Well, since you appear to have all the inside information on this place, what's the best thing to order?"

Olivia laughed, and looked down at her own menu. "Well, what are you in the mood to eat tonight?"

"Food?"

She laughed, thinking that that was exactly the same answer that Sirius would have given. She was about to tell him that, but stopped herself. She knew better than to bring up an old boyfriend on the first date.

"Really, anything they have on the menu is good," she said at last. "Madam Rosmerta does an excellent job of supervising her kitchen staff."

"You're not being very helpful, you know."

"What? I'm telling you the truth!"

The noise level in the bar went up abruptly, and both Olivia and Greg looked up from their menus. A large group of people was spilling in through the doors, talking and laughing loudly. Greg shrugged.

"Family reunion?"

Olivia laughed. "We always manage to pick the crowded nights to come here, don't we?"

"Every night is crowded here," Greg grinned. "That's why they've been in business for so many years. It may slow our service down, though."

"No way," Olivia said confidently. "Madam Rosmerta will make sure we're taken care of, even if she can't wait on us herself."

"Bold words."

"It's going to happen."

Greg looked at her for a moment, his eyes twinkling. "Care to make a friendly wager?"

Olivia leaned forward, her eyes glittering with the excitement of a challenge. "You're on. What are the stakes?"

He looked thoughtful for a moment. "The loser has to buy the winner a drink."

"That's it?" Olivia laughed. "Well, I'll go easy on you and pick a cheap drink, then."

"Oh, no," Greg laughed. "When I win, I'm going to order the most expensive drink this bar has to offer!"

"Well, you're going to lose," Olivia replied breezily. "We'll have impeccable service."

"They have about a million people in here! There's no way we can have quick service – it just doesn't make sense."

She shook her head. "It doesn't matter. When you're friends with the people I'm friends with, you get good service."

As if to validate her words, a frazzled waitress rushed over to their table. "I'm so sorry to keep you waiting," she said breathlessly. "Madam Rosmerta is a bit busy right now, and asked me take your order for her. Have you decided what you'd like?"

Olivia looked at Greg with a triumphant smile, then up at the waitress. Her smile faded as she realized who was waiting on them. She would know that sweet, innocent face anywhere. Rebecca was waiting to take their order.

She wasn't even sure what she ordered. All her mind could comprehend was her intense desire to pull the other girl's dark hair out curl by curl. Greg looked at her with questions in his eyes, and asked Rebecca's recommendation for dinner.

"The chicken is our special tonight," she said with a smile. "I had some earlier, so I can tell you firsthand that it's really good."

"I'll have that, then," Greg agreed, handing her his menu. "Thanks."

"Sure," she smiled, taking Olivia's menu as well, trying to ignore the evil look that accompanied it. She bit her lip, then smiled. "You're Olivia, right? Sirius's friend?"

"That's right," Olivia said coldly.

"We met about a month ago," Rebecca said, trying to rectify the situation, her smile becoming nervous. "At the Auror induction. I'm Rebecca, his girlfriend. Do you remember me?"

"Yes," Olivia said shortly.

Rebecca looked at her in confusion. "Well, I'll tell him I saw you."

"Don't bother," Olivia said. "I'll see him at work tomorrow."

"Well, just in case I see him before then," Rebecca said. She tapped the menus against her hand. "I'll go put your order in, then."

Greg looked at Olivia in shock as Rebecca disappeared. "Well, that was rather rude," he said bluntly. "What don't you like about that girl?"

Olivia sighed. "Can we not talk about this right now?"

"No, we need to get it out now," Greg insisted. "Because, to be honest, this is our first date, and at the end of the night, we're going to need to decide if we want to see one another again. Right now, after watching you practically eat that poor little girl alive, I'm not sure I want to see you again."

Olivia flinched. "I didn't mean to give you that impression."

"Maybe it's best you did," he replied a bit coldly. "I want to get to know your real personality, not the one you want to show me."

"I'm not a mean person, if that's what you're thinking."

"It is what I'm thinking. Why else would you treat that girl like that? She seemed sweet."

She sighed again. She was going to have to bring up an old boyfriend after all. "All right, I'll give you the abridged version of the story. She's dating my former boyfriend."

"Ah." Understanding fell across his features. "And, clearly, you're not her number one fan. But, Olivia, you said he's your former boyfriend. Why do you hate her? It's not as if you're still dating him."

"I know," Olivia sighed. "We've been broken up for a long time, but I guess my possessive nature isn't happy letting her just take him like that."

Greg shook his head. "Are you still in love with him?"

"What?" she asked, taken aback.

"You loved him, didn't you?"

She smiled sadly. "Yes. He was the first man I ever loved."

"So, naturally, he's the hardest to get over," Greg said. "I know how it is. It was a year before I dated anyone after I broke up with my first serious girlfriend. But, the question is, are you truly ready for this? Are you ready to move on, and to try another relationship? A relationship with me?"

"Of course," Olivia said. "I'm here, aren't I?"

"Yes, you're here. But is your heart really in this, or would you rather be with him?"

She smiled. "I want to be here with you, Greg."

He exhaled deeply. "All right. Well, I suppose we're past that part, then. But you're sure that you aren't still in love with him?"

"I'm sure," she said with as much conviction as possible. "I'm ready to move on, and, if you're still interested, I'd like to do that with you."

Greg smiled. "So far, I'd say I'm still interested. Just try to keep that temper in check, all right?"

Olivia grinned. "I'll do my best."

As soon as her shift ended, Rebecca Apparated to Sirius's flat. She had to talk to him, regardless of the obscenely late hour. She needed some answers.

"Sirius?" she called, looking around the quiet living room. "Sirius, are you home?"

Sirius emerged from his bedroom wearing a t-shirt and boxers. His hair was mussed and he was blinking repeatedly, but his wand was held steadily before him.

"Rebecca?" he asked incredulously, lowering his wand. "What are you doing here? What time is it?"

"It's about three in the morning," she admitted. "I had to see you, Sirius. We really need to talk about something."

"Here, sit down," he said, indicating the couch. "Just let me go get some clothes on, and then we can talk."

She sat down as instructed, and waited for him to return. He was only gone several minutes, but returned wearing jeans, with his hair in place and teeth brushed. He sat down next to her, looking at her with concern.

"What's going on, sweetheart?" he asked gently.

"I don't really know how to say this," she began a bit awkwardly.

"Take your time," he replied, his heart beginning to beat erratically. Was she pregnant? What would he do if she was? If he wasn't ready to be married, he certainly wasn't ready to be a father! Oh, why couldn't he just control his hormones?

Rebecca drew a deep breath. "I was at work tonight – that's why I had to wait until it was so late to come over."

Sirius nodded, but remained silent, praying that he'd know how to respond to whatever confession she was about to make.

"Well, one of my tables tonight was your friend."

"Which friend?"

"Olivia."

Sirius worked to keep all emotion from his face. "Oh?"

"Why doesn't she like me, Sirius?"

He could have laughed with relief. She wasn't pregnant! "What makes you think she doesn't like you?"

"Well, she didn't talk to me much when I met her at the Auror induction, but I didn't think much of it. I mean, it was her ceremony, too, and she had so many people to talk to. I didn't expect her to be as chatty with me as the others were. But tonight . . ."

"What happened?" Sirius asked, fighting to keep his voice level. If Olivia had done something to hurt her . . .

"Well, she was just really harsh, I suppose. No, that's not it. She was rude to me. Flat out rude. I'd almost call her mean."

Sirius's eyes narrowed. "I'll talk to her."

"No, Sirius, I don't care if she treats me like that," Rebecca said quickly. "I work in a bar. Plenty of people are less than nice to me in a night. I just want to know why, that's all."

"Well, regardless, she shouldn't treat you that way." Sirius sighed, and ran his hand through his hair. After all these months of not confessing the truth about his relationship with Olivia, it was time to tell her. "Olivia . . . Olivia and I have a past together."

Rebecca frowned. "A romantic past?"

"Yes. She and I dated during our seventh year at Hogwarts, and continued dating until this past fall."

"What happened?"

"She wanted to get married."

"And you didn't?"

"No, I didn't. I wasn't ready, and she didn't want to wait anymore. So, we parted ways."

"But you loved her?"

"Yes. I loved her."

"Were you in love with her?"

He nodded. "Yes, I was. She was my first love. She was the first girl I ever made love to. I loved her very much, and I suppose part of me always will."

She nodded, and swallowed. "And now?"

"Now I'm with you," he said, putting his arm around her to draw her close beside him. "Olivia and I are over, and we have been for quite some time. You're the one that I want to be with now, Rebecca, not her."

She looked up at him with wide, trusting eyes. "Do you love me, Sirius?"

"What?" Her words had shocked him, and her eyes told him that she expected nothing less than an honest answer.

"I've told you that I love you many times, but you've never said it back. Do you love me, or are you just amusing yourself with me?"

"Rebecca, I am not using you, if that's what you're asking," he said firmly. He paused, trying to decide how to answer her question. "But do you know why I've never told you that I love you?"

"I assume it's because you're scared."

He smiled. "Sort of." He sighed. "I'm going to be terribly honest with you, if that's what you want."

"Please."

He nodded. "I'm honestly just not sure of my feelings. I know that I care for you deeply, and that you are very important and special to me. I know that my life is better for having you in it. But I'm just not positive that I love you. And, Rebecca, I will never say anything unless I truly mean it – and that includes telling you that I love you. Until I've sorted everything out, I'm going to have to ask you to be patient with me. But, when you hear me say those words, you have to know that I will mean them with everything in me. When I tell you I love you, it's because I truly mean it."

"Are you not sure about me because you still love her?"

He closed his eyes, then opened them again. "I was in love with Olivia for a long time – longer than I even knew. When she left me, she broke my heart. Like I told you before, part of me will always love her. But, our relationship has ended. She no longer loves me or wants me in her life in a romantic sense. I've dealt with that, and my feelings for her are now irrelevant."

"But you're still a part of her life in a non-romantic sense?"

"We work together," he said simply. "We've just been assigned to be partners in our field work. So, yes, she will continue to be a part of my professional life. But you have nothing to worry about. You're the one I want to be with romantically."

She drew a deep breath. "This is a lot to handle, Sirius."

"I know," he said, surprised that she hadn't started screaming at him for any of this. He would have been yelling at her if the tables were turned. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you all this sooner – especially the part about Olivia. I should have been upfront about her from the beginning. But you never asked about my past relationships, and I didn't want to have to put you through hearing about her – or any other girlfriends, for that matter."

"You've had others?" she asked listlessly.

"No one serious," he said quickly. "No one that I loved, and no one that I slept with. They were just girls that I dated briefly during fifth and sixth year at Hogwarts. I'm sure you've had similar relationships."

"I had one serious one," she said softly. "We dated sixth and seventh year, but broke up after graduation."

"Why?"

"He was moving to Germany for his job. He asked me to go, but I didn't want to. I couldn't leave my family. And I'm glad I didn't go. Right after he left, my mum got sick. I wouldn't trade being with her during the last months of her life for anything."

"Did you love him?" Sirius asked softly.

"Yes." She smiled. "He's the same for me as Olivia is for you, I suppose. He was the first man I loved. He was the first one I made love to. It broke my heart when he left, but I had to get over him. I had to move on."

"And you have."

"Yes," she said softly. "Have you?"

"If I hadn't moved on, could I be with you the way I have?"

"I suppose not."

He ran his finger over her cheek. "Are we all right, Rebecca?"

She nodded. "I guess so. I just wish things could be different."

"Different how?"

"I wish that you could love me the way that I love you."

He put both of his arms around her, pulling her closer to him. "So do I, sweetheart. But I do want to be with you. I want to get to know you better. I really care for the person I've been getting to know these past months."

She sighed against his chest. "But you don't love me."

"Rebecca . . ."

"I know," she said quickly. "You've explained it, and I understand. Really. I do." She sighed again. "I guess I'm just going to have to be content with what you're giving me for now."

"Thank you."

She smiled a bit sadly. "What else can I do, Sirius? I can't leave you. I love you."