Dedicated to my friend Ciara since she got pissed off at me for giving her a bad part on Shower Madness.
I also added Reina Final Fantasys Child in here. She will be really happy with her part.
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Social Life Sucks
Chapter 15: Voo-Doo Victim
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One day, Jaz was invited to her friend, Ciara's, slumber party at her house.
"Alright, girls, time to open presents!" Ciara's mother said yelling from downstairs.
All of her friends rushed down stairs with their presents for her and gathered in the guest room.
One by one, dear Ciara got nothing but makeup, lotion, and underwear. That's until she opened Jaz's gift.
The Birthday girl reached into the box and pulled out the box. But not just no ordinary box.
Her eyes widened.
She beamed.
Finally, she laughed - laughed so hard, the house could come down.. literally. "OH MY GOD! YOU GOT ME A ROY MUSTANG COLLECTABLE ACTION FIGURE!"
Jaz smirked. "Yup, I got it at Hot Topic while we were at Vegas!" she said proudly.
Quickly, and eagerly, she opened the box taking the Roy doll out, hugging it, purring softly, and stroking it.
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At that same moment except with the real Roy...
"Man... I hate paperwork... why is it that we're always doing paperwork?" The Colonel complained.
"JESUS CHRIST WE'RE IN THOSE FANFICTION! RUUN RUUUUUUNN!" Fuery peed in his pants and ran out of the office screaming and running down the hall. That's until he came across Hello Kitty who kicked his ass and bit his winky off. Fuery sadly, yet painfully and unrealistically, died.
"O-kay..." Havoc said breaking the freakishly long silence.
All of the sudden, Roy got up from his chair and walked over to Havoc. There he started to lean on him.
"Sir, why are you leaning on me?" Havoc said grimacing.
"I-I dont know. I just did it all of the sudden..." Roy said just as shocked and confused as Havoc.
Poor Falman, he didn't know what was going on cause he was blind like Brock on Pokemon.
All of the sudden, Hawkeye walked in and everyone stared at each other. Well... errr... except Falman.
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"MY MOM HAS A HAIRY BUTT!" Falman randomly yelled out.
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While Ciara was having a stroking episode with her new... toy... Jaz interrupted the scene. "YOINK!" she said easily snatching the toy.
Ciara kept stroking it. 3 minutes later, after realizing her toy wasn't in her possession anymore, she was stroking to what appears to be nothing. She looked around.
"Stroke me! Stroke me more!" demanded a voice.
"Who said that?" Ciara snapped.
"Some people use me to make water. Other call me a gas. But you can call me AIR!"
"..."
"Fine, but the next time you breathe me, I hope you die! Besides I'm everywhere you know- I'll be watching you NO-MATTER-WHAT! So the next time you take a shower, you're not alone... MUAHAHAHAHAH!" The voice faded out.
Ciara shrugged. She looked left. She looked right. She looked up and down, around the town, Under her ass, and in her pants. Still, no sign of Roy. She panicked, that's until she saw Jaz examining it.
"Wow, this is such a detailed 3D example of Roy.." Jaz muttered looking at it.
Ciara snatched it and gave Jaz a glare.
"HEY! I WANNA LOOK AT IT!" Jaz whined trying to snatch it back.
Quickly, Ciara hid it in her shirt with the figure of Roy showing up from inside the shirt. "OH HO! CAN'T GET ROY NOW!"
Jaz pouted.
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Hawkeye tried to pry Roy off of Havoc. "GEEZ! IT'S LIKE YOU'RE GLUED TO EACH OTHER!" She growled.
Finally, she got him off.
"YES! I AM FREE!" Roy shouted victoriously.
Then he did a dance.
All of the sudden, Roy's head went directly under Hawkeye's shirt.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!" Hawkeye let out a shrill scream batting on Roy's head who was under her jacket, shirt... and lingerie... "GET OUT! GET OUT GET OUT!"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!" Roy was screaming as well.
Havoc watched in amusement. "You GO COLONEL!"
"AAAAGH! AAAAAGH! AAAAAAGH! AAAAAAGH! AAAAAGH! Hey nice jugs! AAAAGH! AAAAAGH! AAAAAAAGH! AAAAAAGH! Hey you even pierced your nipples! AAAAAGH! AAAAAAGH! AAAAAGH! AAAAAGH!" Roy continued to yell.
The struggle of Roy's Head getting out of Riza's shirt continued.
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Jaz started chasing Ciara around the house. "GET ROY OUT FROM UNDER YOUR BRA AND GIVE ME THE FREAKIN DOLL!" Jaz yelled.
"NEVER!" Ciara yelled back. Finally, she locked herself in her bedroom.
Jaz tried to open it but it was locked. "DAMNIT!" she cursed.
Ciara sat on her bed and took the Roy doll out from her shirt. She stared at it and grinned. "Now, to see how fine his ass is!" She turned the doll upside down and started looking for places.
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Roy got his head out of from Hawkeye's shirt. He took long breaths. "Wow..." He said.
Then Hawkeye punched him so hard it sent him crashing through the walls-- all the way to the Fuhrer's office.
"Uugh! MUSTANG!" Fuhrer took the pillow he was recently embracing and hid it behind his back. "U-uhm... Mustang.. what are you doing here?"
Before Mustang could answer, he bent over showing his ass towards the Fuhrer. "WHAT IN GOD'S NAME IS HAPPENING?"
Fuhrer walked over to Mustang staring at his fine butt. "Yummy.." He purred, licking his lips.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
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Ciara sighed. "I can't see whether his butt is fine or not..." Reluctantly, she sat Roy on the edge of the highest shelf.
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Before the Fuhrer could 'attack', Roy ran as fast as he could. He ran up the stairs until he was on the highest part of the building. There, he stood on the edge of the building.
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Jaz finally pushed the door open which slammed into the wall and made Roy fall from his shelf. "AH HA! YOU DIDN'T LOCK IT AT ALL!" she said.
Ciara, unaware that the Roy doll fell from the shelf stared at Jaz.
"Well, uhm, anyway, your mom hooked up the spa. You better get into your suit..." Jaz said closing the door softly as she left.
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Roy's voice echoed as he fell of the building. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA--!"
splat
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Ciara took out her bathing suit from her dresser, then she turned to Roy. She grinned. She picked up the doll and started rubbing it on her butt. "Kiss it, Roy! KISS IT!"
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Roy woke up in the middle of the sidewalk. He sat up and got his vision straightened out. Then he saw Reina walking away from him. "Reina?" he said.
Reina turned her head around. "Roy?"
"Oh Rein-AAAAAAAAAHHHH!" Roy couldn't stop his legs as they ran towards her butt. There, he dug his face into her butt and began kissing, smooching, rubbing his face in it.
"OH ROY!" She giggled.
And during this public affair, crowds and crowds gathered to watch. Horny Bastards aren't they?
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"CIARA!" Her mother screamed.
"COMING!" Ciara took Roy's head out from her butt and laid it on her bed. She changed into her bathing suit and went downstairs in the backyard to the spa.
After she left, Ciara's brother slipped in the room.
"Finally, I have obtained my gun liscense. Now, to find a suitable target." Her big brother looked around the room and then spotted Roy. "Heh, this'll do."
He grabbed the Roy Doll and walked away.
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"I swear... I'm in hell... burning hell... eternally damned..." Roy whined as he walked through the empty streets in ripped clothing. "What did I do to deserve this?"
He suddenly paused. "Okay, maybe I did deserve this from killingabunchofIshablliansbackintheday, but come on, God, why did I have to suffer like this? God, you must hate me!"
Random yellow water from the sky squirted on Roy's jacket. "Oh... shiiiiii--"
Behind him, he heard the reloading of a gun. He turned around. It was Riza.
"Oh, Riza, I'm so glad you're he--"
BAM!
KA-PLUMP
The End. Or is it?
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I hope you understood what was going on. IF not, then yur gay!