Chapter 5: Confession... torn between two loves.

I got home and plunged on the bed. Gaara walked me home! I thought. It kept replaying in my head…

Temari walked between us, she pretended to see a cute bird fly by and ran ahead of us to get a good look at it.

"An Eagle!" she cried. 'Impossible' I thought. Eagles don't live around here. It's not to their liking. But I pretended to play along, as Gaara was very close to me now.

"Where?" I pretended to look. If he wanted a cute girl who pretended things were there, then I guess I could play along.

"Never mind, it's gone now" Temari, turned and smiled at us, then went skipping along ahead of us like a child

'What is she doing?' I pondered to myself, Gaara must have been grateful for the (somewhat) privacy. He walked closer to me. His hand touched mine. I blushed and looked down at the ground. My long hair, which I had forgotten to tie back today, fell over my cheek, hopefully blocking his view of my embarrassing emotional outbreak. That didn't stop him; he just chuckled then reached over gently brushing my hair away from my face and tucked it behind my ear.

"Your hair is blocking my view" He smiled. It made me blush even more. I looked up at him. We both stopped walking. He touched my hand again. The embrace of his hand was warm against my own. My mouth opened as if to speak but no sound came out. I was speechless. He held both of my hands in his, and lifted it up to his lips. He kissed them gently.

"I…. I…I didn't get to say goodnight the other day." He pulled me in close.

"T-t-that is true…" I managed to say. Jeez that was stupid! Gaara didn't seem to mind. He just pulled me in closer, closed his eyes, I did the same. He kissed me. A gentle, sweet kiss! So soft and so sweet. Long enough to give me a taste of his lips and leave me addicted, but short enough that I craved more.

We broke apart; I opened my eyes to see his sweet smile. He then took me in his arms and held me close. I've never been so happy. Again we parted and I saw someone behind him. I could not make out whom it was.

"What is it? What's wrong? Did I ---"

"No… there's someone there…"

Gaara turned, but the person was gone… who could it have been?

I didn't want to think about who it was… though the thought haunted me. I decided to get my mind off it; after all, my math homework wasn't going to do itself.

I was rudely awoken by the usual 6:30 alarm. The sunlight had just entered my room by the window. I can't believe it's been 2 weeks already! Gaara and I were going to celebrate with a picnic in the park. How romantic! He's sweet like that. I stepped out of the shower and got dressed. I put on my low-rise jeans and the red off the shoulder blouse that Sasuke gave me last Christmas. It reminded me of him.

"Isn't Sasuke's birthday sometime soon?" Gaara asked between sips of his coke.

"Next Tuesday" I replied

"What are you guys going to do to celebrate?"

"I'm not sure yet… I haven't seen much of Sasuke lately…"

"Maybe because we're always together." Gaara bowed his head, as if he was ashamed.

"What do you mean by that?" I looked at him. His messy red hair seemed to make him look even cuter.

"He… He doesn't know about us does he Saku?"

I looked away. Come to think of it, neither one of us had told him we were together. I felt guilty. Sasuke is my best friend! He should have been the first to know. I felt as if I've stabbed him in the back. Gaara wrapped his arms around me.

"I know Saku-chan. I understand how you feel… It's obvious that Sasuke has feelings for you. And I'll admit that I get jealous sometimes."

"Wha!" I was surprised. Since when has Sasuke looked at me any different? Gaara placed a finger on my lips and continued.

"But I remember that he is your best friend, and you need to be close to him. I love you, making you happy is my all time objective." He pulled me closer to him and caressed my neck with his warm breath. "We'll tell him together. Ok?" He kissed my cheek.

I smiled, "thank you." We kissed.

"Sakura?"

We broke apart to see who it was.

"Sasuke?"

"Gaara?"

"…"Gaara let go of me and stared at Sasuke.

"Sorry…I… I never knew you guys were together." Sasuke looked away, he seemed kind of hurt. I stood up.

"Sasuke… I… I… I meant to tell you… but it's just that…that--"

"DON'T!" Sasuke snapped around and looked at me with those angry eyes. I kind of jumped back scared. He's never talked to me in that tone before. He's never looked at me with those cold eyes before. Why did my heart hurt when he looked at me like that? He shook his head. "I mean. Don't…It's alright." He said turning back around. His voice was a lot calmer. "It's just, well, you're my best friend… you should have told me."

"I know… I know… Sasuke… I'm so sorry." I looked at him with great concern. He couldn't have been that mad to say that, but then again… why did he explode on me?

"It's ok." He assured me.

Gaara got up and walked over to Sasuke. He stretched out his hand. "So now that you're ok with this… friends?"

Sasuke hesitated looking at Gaara as if he were a bug, one that needed to be killed, and fast. Nevertheless, Sasuke took his hand and shook it sternly. "Yeah."

Since that day Sasuke has been even more distant. It hurt me that we didn't go out to the ice cream shop on Thursdays anymore, nor did he come around to the shelter to say hi to the animals and me. Then again, I didn't go around to the Academy much anymore. It was getting late, and I was headed home. Gaara had gone to his fathers for the weekend, he had wanted to take me, and begged me to go but I had work so I couldn't. So that night I had no escort. As I passed the Academy, I paused to look at it. The yard was still beautiful, but seemed lifeless and unwelcoming. I knew there was a swing further down through the yard in a mini orchard.

"Just for old times sake" I muttered to myself as I walked through the front garden. I walked around the Dojo to the backyard where the mini orchard was, and there was that old rope swing. I sat on it. I remember, this was one of the most wonderful places Sasuke took me when we were kids. Growing up I'd always play here with him after school before his lessons. The Dojo master was very kind to us both, and when Sasuke went in to his lessons, I was allowed to stay and watch. I learned how to fight, and yes I fight! I didn't think that it was a skill I needed until my first day at middle school…

There was this one girl who didn't like me because she had a thing for Sasuke. She did everything possible to hurt me or put me down just to get Sasuke's love and affection. It's a good thing it didn't work! P. I remember there was this one time when I had just gotten a new dress on the morning of my birthday. It was a pretty dress. Short, sleeveless, white dress with a red ribbon tied around my waist. I had used a new red ribbon to tie my hair back with. I loved that dress. Sasuke must have too! He brought me two red flowers from his mother's garden. He was so cute. All covered in dirt and mud from picking them out. His fingers were even bleeding a little from the thorns on the roses. He was so cute!

I shook my head and giggled at the thought.

"I can't believe I remember that…" I said out loud to myself

"Remember what?" I jumped off the swing startled, I whipped around to see who it was.

"Sasuke?"

"Yeah? Who did you think it was?" He walked towards me, I relaxed, and relieved that it was someone I knew. "Jeez Saku, we've grown that much apart? You can't even recognize me by my voice anymore…" He walked passed me and gazed up at the stars. I hadn't even noticed that the sun had totally set.

I stayed silent, ashamed of the cold truth that came from Sasuke's lips. "I'm sorry…" I whispered, lowering my head, my hair fell over my face covering it.

Sasuke sat down on the swing, the rather large swing that can fit two people. "For what?" He asked. As if he didn't know!

"For not telling you about Gaara and me…" I said looking away from him.

"Oh that…" He looked down. It was as if time had frozen and we were just there. It must have been that way for… I'm not sure how long, but it felt longer than it most likely was. He looked back up at the sky, smiling. Smiling! "It's ok… You know Saku, I just want you to be happy." He looked and me then took my hand. The next thing I knew I was on the swing next to him. I looked at his face. But I didn't see Sasuke, the guy I had grown up with, the guy who had lived across the street from me my whole life, the guy I saw as my brother, my best friend. Instead, I saw Uchiha Sasuke. I saw him, for the first time, I really saw him for who he was. This smart, funny, sweet, caring, sexy guy in my homeroom class that all the girls in school chased around. I had no Idea what I was thinking. Maybe it was just the moonlight. I don't know. But I saw a side of Sasuke I had never seen before. I felt… attracted. He was hot! Maybe even hotter than Gaara. Wait, he WAS hotter than Gaara! I felt myself turning red. I quickly looked away.

He looked at me just as I did so. Then he continued. "Saku… I wanted to tell you first. You know how I want to be a doctor right?" I just nodded my head "And I sent my application form to Tokyo University. I know I'm only turning 17, but they looked over my academic records and were extremely impressed! At first they couldn't believe that a junior could be this advanced. So they sent me this IQ test, if I passed it then… then they'd accept me and I'd only have to stay here in this dump for one more year! Can you believe it Saku! I'm going to graduate a year ahead! Isn't it great?"

I felt my heart sink. "You're leaving?" I tried to sound at least a little bit happy… but I wasn't. Sasuke was leaving! I couldn't picture my life without him! I felt like crying. A tear slipped past my eyes and fell on my hand it glistened in the moonlight.

"Yeah! In like 10 months or something like that. There's still plenty of time. Please don't tell anyone. I haven't gotten my test results back. And I wanted to surprise everyone." He seemed so happy. How come I wasn't happy for him? Well okay I was happy… I was happy that he's finally fulfilling his dream. Since he was a kid all he would talk about was med school at Tokyo U.

"I see…"

"Eh? Saku? Are you alright?" I shook my head and looked up at him. I put on my best "smile"

"YEP! Of course I am! That's great Sasu!"

"Sasu?" Sasuke smiled and hugged me tightly. My eyes widened in shock. I blushed. "You haven't called me that in so long. I thought you'd forgotten"

I placed my arms on his back, hugging him too. "How could I? Ever?"

"You mean so much to me Saku…" he pulled me in closer. "More than you'll ever know."

Speechless, I just laid my head on his shoulder. My body seemed to act on it's own. But… it felt so right. Why did it feel so right? We stayed like that for a while. Time seemed to freeze again.

He pulled away gently, his hands still holing me arms. He gazed into my eyes and I into his.

"I never told you this before… but…" He blushed and smiled. "I've always had feelings for you. Since we've been kids… Since middle School… For as long as I can remember. All I really want is to see you happy. Even if it's not with me. But all I really want for my birthday… Is the chance to tell you how I really feel." He leaned in and kissed me gently. I closed my eyes, savoring each and every second. He was a better kisser than Gaara was. He pulled away, and hugged me again. "I love you Saku… I always have. And I always will. Nothing can ever change that. Nothing can ever replace the place I have for you in my heart."

Something in the distance moved. It startled both of us. Sasuke jumped up, ready to fight off whoever it was. We spent half an hour scouting the Academy grounds for any sign of the eavesdropper. We gave up 20 minutes later. And Sasuke walked me home. We didn't say anything to each other the entire time. I wonder who that was. I was scared to tell Gaara. Or what if that person was Gaara? He would be so hurt! I cringed at the thought. Maybe it was someone who could tell Gaara. I was so confused. Sasuke was in love with me. For all these years and I had no idea! To make things worse I didn't know if I had feeling for him as well. What if what I felt for Gaara wasn't real? I was so confused. Torn between two loves…