Hey, here is chapter five of my story, enjoy!

A thanks to my reviewers, as always: Mrs. Nikki Slater, mandieC, and Allimba

This chapter is about 2 pages shorter than the usual length, but it's still long enough: five pages. I was satisfied with the story at the point I decided to end

Disclaimer: Don't own Suze, Jesse, or Paul :( Wah!

Read and review…..

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Querida, the word sounded through my mind, echoing and bouncing off the walls of my mind. Querida…I shook my head, trying to rid myself of the voice. Even in death, Jesse will always haunt me, his silky voice resounding in my head. My sobs deepened. This was it; this was truly it, finally. Jesse… he's dead. I mean, really dead.

For someone who should've meant so little to me, ended up meaning everything to me. He had been a ghost when I first met him, and yet he ended up meaning everything in the world to me then, as he did when he was alive. I think that he possibly meant even more to me when he was a ghost, when he could be there for me no matter anything that happened at all. He would and could always protect me.

When he became alive, he lost that invincibility to protect me. I love him-loved-and he means absolutely everything. He, in a sense defines my life. I don't think much at all about my life before him, and I cannot imagine life without him. My life will someday be explained in two ways: My life before Jesse and my life after Jesse. He changed my life, everything I knew, and everything I believed in. He taught me about the power of true love, and the power of near-heartbreak. He will always be my first love, probably my only real love ever, as Madame Zara so kindly put it. Lot she knew, saying that it would last forever. This, to me, does not look like a forever-love.

Querida, the word sounded again, and I choked on my tears. That is, before I felt a pressure on my arm, a gentle pressure, equaling in sensitivity to Jesse's soft touch. Even his touch could not escape me.

Susannah is so lost in her sobs, that she has not noticed me yet. I've called the word querida various times already, the one fail-proof thing that she would respond to no matter what, and yet she hasn't noticed. I'm tugging on her arm, desperately trying to get her attention. I want her to stop sobbing, she doesn't deserve this unhappiness, not because of… me. "Querida," I try again, "Please, listen. Stop crying, it's me-Jesse" I added my name, hoping she will finally snap too. Instead, more sobs. "Susannah, querida, por favor," I resorted to Spanish, even though she barely understands the word querida. "Escúchame, querida, aquí estoy, por favor, no llores." (Listen to me, querida, I'm here, please don't cry)

I think the Spanish going through my head made me finally realize, that it was not my imagination, and that it maybe, possibly was Jesse calling to me. I know that my Spanish I could not possibly teach that much of perfect Spanish. I finally turned to my side, my vision blurry and noticed the softest glow right beside my body. A glow so soft, I could barely see it. But it was there, no mistake in that. The fingers pressing against my side grasped my arm and gently tugged on me, helping to ease me onto my side.

Wiping at my eyes, I got a clear view of Jesse sitting at my bedside, his fingers wrapped around my arm in a way so soft that only he can manage the softness. "Jesse," my voice, not sounding at all like my own, so hoarse called out. "Jesse?"

His other hand rose to me face, grazing my cheek softly. I flinched; his fingers were so cold, not at all warm. Not even the slightest bit of warmth remained. "You're dead," I whispered, the sobs trying to squeeze through my larynx. His head bowed, as if he too was just beginning to realize the sad truth. His fingers stopped grazing my cheek, returning to his lap.

"Jesse I-" He cut my sentence off, placing his finger over my lips.

"Querida, no… I'm just going to make this easy for the two of us." He looked away into the distance, looking out the window. "I know what it is that is holding me back." His voice just above a whisper, laced in seriousness and sadness. I choked, blinking unsuccessfully away at the tears that continued to slip from my eyes.

I know what I have to do. I will not allow myself to stay any longer on this plane, haunting Susannah. Because if I stay, she too will never move on. What lies ahead of me scares me. I never thought I would face my end, but now it is hanging in the air, just waiting for me to reach out and grasp it, tantalizing me. I took her hand in mine, and she recoiled, shivering, I thought, from the coldness.

"Susannah, querida, I want you to know, that I love you. I never loved another like I ever loved you, not in all my time, which we both know is quite a lot. Like I already said, I know exactly what it is that is holding me here, in the plane of existence. So I want you to assure me that you will too move on. For your sake, just as much as mine. Once I'm gone, that's, it. You must move on with your life. You still have it, please appreciate it and use it to the best of your advantage. Nothing hurts more than losing it. And it doesn't get any easier the second time around." Her eyes were fixed on me blankly, like she was receiving this information, but not processing it. At some point she had stopped sobbing though her tears still streamed her face.

I couldn't help but stare at Jesse, here he was, telling me to just move on with my life as soon as he moved on. But what he is saying is absurd, he says it as if it is as easy as tying my shoes or riding a bike. But it isn't: a part of me will never forget Jesse, a part that will always hold on; that will hold me back just a little bit before making final decisions. I can't erase Jesse and the effect he had on me, nor will I be able to fully move on, I just won't.

"Jesse… please, you don't have to do this" I tried, my voice pleading with him. "I don't care about you being a ghost; we can work through it like we did the first time. Please… just please. I don't care about not ever being able to show you to my parents… they already know you." Even as I spoke, I knew I didn't sound convincing. Because I didn't. Sound convincing, I mean. Now that Jesse had been a part of my life, I know I can go back to the way things were. I'd be setting myself up for inevitable heartbreak. And if anything got to tough, then he would make himself move on, taking care of that unfinished business. "I love you" I whispered, giving in to the idea of him moving on.

"Querida, someday you'll understand, and you'll be grateful for this. So please, promise me, that you'll move on too." I gazed longingly into her eyes. Probably for the last time ever. "Please, promise me this." I could see the heartbrokenness in her eyes. It is hurting me just as much as it hurting you, querida.

One lone tear trailed down my cheek, zigzagging into my lip. My tongue brushed at it, licking the saltiness that remained. "I promise," I heard myself saying before even thinking about it. Now I would have to withhold this promise.

"Good," Jesse breathed, releasing a breath, "I don't want you mourning your loss for to long. Move on. It won't make you a bad person." He swept me into his arms, and he held me for what may have been forever. My head huddled into his chest, my ear searching for the steady heartbeat, finding no signs of life left there. His lips, in one last attempt to savor mine, met mine. My lips parted, loving the way his lips felt against mine. After four months, it felt so good to feel his lips reacting against mine. My tongue slid into his mouth, if only for a second for one last taste. Cadaver breath, I remembered calling him so long ago, back when id didn't know any better. Finally he withdrew from the kiss, standing up, pulling me with him.

"Good-bye, querida," He whispered into the air. I expected him to fade away at that moment, but he didn't, he held on just a bit longer. "I'm going to go take care of my business," he trailed off. I assumed kissing my one last time was his unfinished business, but apparently not so. "And, tell your sister about me someday," and that's when he dematerialized, a knowing smile playing at his lips. Goodbye to you, Jesse, I thought to myself.

I appeared in Slater's house. He is the only one who can take care of my unfinished business. He was sprawled across his bed, his hands covering his eyes. "Slater," My voice pierced into the silent air. His hands shot up, and his eyes searched his room, getting his bearing. His eyes widened in shock when he saw me.

"Jesse?" This is too much. He just died, and he already wants to haunt me?

Grief suddenly washed over me. Never once in my whole shifting history had I ever known the spirits who decided to bug the living hell out of me. Never had I really bothered with mediating them either. One of two things happened: I shifted the ghost to Shadowland and left him or her there, or I just let them find someone else. Now, the ghost of my best friend stood right before my eyes. For a second, I felt an animosity towards him, as if the fact that he was a ghost again changed the fact I'd gotten to know him in the last year, when he had not been a ghost. God… this shifter crap complicates things. My anger ceased, and I remembered this was Jesse, my friend.

"Jesse?" I asked again, just to clarify.

"Yes, Paul. It's me, Jesse. Listen, I want you to take care of something for me…" he trailed off, waiting for my response. He probably felt that same instant hate when he saw me again, his perspective as a ghost now. I nodded, allowing him to continue.

"Yeah, whatever man. You know I'll do it for you. Consider yourself a lucky one, de Silva. Any other ghost I'd send a packing, but I'm willing to make the exception for you." I smiled at him, despite the circumstances.

Good, I thought. Paul really is the only who can do this for me, though it involves Susannah directly. "Paul," I sighed. "As you know, that weekend I was going to propose to Susannah, but all this happened." He nodded again, waiting for me to continue. "Well, the ring, it meant everything to me. I carried it with me everywhere I went. I just want you to get it back, hold on to it… for me. It's in my coat jacket, you know the Adidas track jacket? The blue one? Well, get the ring from it…" I trailed off again, formulating my words in my head before speaking again.

I don't know what de Silva was getting at. I got the part about the ring, but what about it? He was stalling a lot. Yet, I listened. He would do the same thing for me.

"I want you to get the ring, and keep it. Just… don't ever use it…I want you to give it to Susannah, someday, when you think she's ready. I want you to take care of her. Don't let anything happen to her, please. When you give it to her, please make sure it won't interfere with her marriage. Tell her it's from me, and how much she meant to me. Please…I know, it is a lot to ask of you, but… I just need this done. If you agree, just like that. I'll move on. I want you to promise me." I think he was done now, I waited a bit longer before finally nodding.

"Don't worry, Jesse. I'll do it. It'll be tough, but I'll do it." I expected at that moment for him to disappear, but he didn't. Instead, he waited, expectantly. "I promise." He smiled at me then started fading.

"Thank you, Paul. So much. Bye…" his voice disappeared, an echo left behind in my empty room. His whole body had faded when he said 'much' and the bye was nothing more than an echo left behind.

Then it hit me, Jesse's gone. Rico, de Silva, Héctor. He was gone. "Good bye, Jesse. I'll miss ya, bud." I called into the air, even though he wouldn't hear me. Not anymore. If there is such a thing as heaven and hell, I can only wish he is heaven, where he belongs, hopefully reuniting with his family.

I grabbed my car keys off my desk, and set off for de Silva's apartment, where I knew his jacket would be. Probably still hanging on the back of his dining room chair, where he always left it. It will be weird to walk into his apartment to not find him there. Ever again.

I shed silent tears after Jesse left. His words still rang over and over in my head. He said he was going to take care of his business, and he said bye. His parting words. There are so many things now that I would do differently, but it is too late, he is gone. I don't know how I'd missed this… but he had said to tell my sister about him someday? What could it mean? No one knew the gender of my mother's baby, and how would he know the due date? March 16th, that's when my mom's due. Those were his parting words?

At that moment, a shriek snapped me out of m reverie. My head jerked up from its position in my hands. It was my mom. I ran out the room, down the stairs to my mother. All I saw was commotion and chaos. And a puddle underneath my mother. Andy scurried around, grabbing my mother's bag from the closet for when the baby came. My baby sister is going to be born today; I smiled to myself, remembering Jesse's words.

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Well, that's it. Suze is having a sister and…. Gasp! Jesse is no more… :( :( :( Please, don't kill me… I'm already crying enough as it is

Chapter six will be up sometime soon