Okay well Iam updating again , and I really like this story a lot , because I draw a lot of themes from the sister story : Fisrt Cut is the Deepest. Well in this chapter Spike and Faye have there first romantic encounter.

Hope you enjoy. \SO FUCKING SORRY THIS CHAPPIE CAME SO LATE.

888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888

Spike washed his ship vigorously , wasting the energy he didn't have, despite the hotness the seemed to encase the bebop . His normally yellow shirt was drenched with the warm mixture of water and sweat. Spike just couldn't risk wearing his normally burgundy top and having Jet notice or even worst another Faye accident.

The day was been stretched with tension between , Himself and Spike. All through breakfast Faye had been looking at him with wide green wondrous eyes, questioning him in thick silence. Even Jet had picked up on it , and question him. But Spike has easily brushed him off without second thought.

"Damnit "

Spike mumbled has thoughts of Faye ransacked through his mind. Her crimson lips , her body blessed with curves in all the right places….

Spike shook his head with disgust , he was betraying Julia, the one he truly love , the one he was truly meant to be with. Julia was his true angel , his true delight , the one thing in his life worth living for, now she was gone and it all entirely and completely Spike's Fault.

Spike felt the hose in his left hand go limp , a sure signal the water pressure was gone , but he did not move to enthrall by the depth of his own thought. The impending choice between loving death with Julia or throbbing passion with Faye.

"Spike?"

In his deep trance Spike had missed Faye creep into the room. Her cat like face beautiful and tainted with a emotion of concern.

"Huh?"

His voice escaped his throat before he could add it's now normal heavy dose of venom. Instead of sounding harsh and surly as he had meant it to be, instead it came out slowly and as though that spoke volume.

Then there was a tiny silence that felt as thought it had lengthened into the heart of forever. Spike's eyes locked with Faye's. Between the two of them there was a silent conflict raging on. Their eyes question each other , wanting explanations for last nights events.

In Faye's eyes lay a quiet concern that was soon turn to a yell.

In Spike's eyes stood a unmistaken look of withdrawal and guilt.

Faye looked at Spike in questioning, he wasn't wearing his normal ' clean the Swordfish ' , no instead he wore his normal outfit minus the jacket, and Faye knew actually why. The cuts, the deep bloody cuts.

She had to help him.

"Spike the hose?"

Faye's voice was clear as a bell in Spike's ears, as he finally noticed that he was standing there like an idiot holding a dead hose. Spike dropped the lifeless tool to the hard metal floor.

Spike noticed his mistake of being civil and instantly let the walls back up again , he gave Faye an icy look that could freeze all of hell over.

"Thanks."

His words were cold.

Faye's eyebrows were furrowed but she took another brave step from where she stood in the only convenient doorway out of the garage.

"Spike, what's happening to you."

She gave him the once over , examining his wet shirt and both arms , his right was hidden discreetly behind his back the other was hidden underneath Spike's blue jacket. He stepped closer to Faye to make his escape.

" Faye move out the doorway."

Faye contained a shudder at how calm his voice was.

"No. Spike Just tell me what's going on ."

On her eyes were watering , she breathed out slowly trying to maintain cool , she couldn't believe this was Spike anymore.

Calm , Collected , The Fighter , in control.

The Spike wasn't here anymore . This new Spike had a death wish so badly , he couldn't wait for it to come to him.

"Faye , Move."

His voice came out from gritted teeth. His eyes studied Faye , the only thing that stood between he and Death , him and his precious blood stained blade.

The only thing standing between him and Julia.

"No , Spike , I won't let you kill yourself."

Spike bristled as he took a threatening step forward , he was almost on top of Faye. Faye could smell his body drenched with sweet sweat and the faint smell of water.

" Faye , just fucking move ."

Faye quivered a how controlled he sounded.

" No , I can't ."

Spike clenched his fist into balls of steel and he felt his jaw lock.

"You are not responsible for me. "

"Who is then Julia ?"

Faye gasped at how quickly Spike reacted to her words. Instead of smacking her clear across the face as Faye had excepted he slammed his body past her , almost knocking her to the ground , but Faye spun and follow knowing she had caught a nerve.

"FUCK OFF FAYE"

Spike stride pickup into a light jog as he powered himself down the Bebop's dark hallways.

"Spike , Why can't you just let her go !"

Faye barked at his bark , as he spun once again on his heel to face her , as though daring her to repeat herself.

Never Dare Faye Valentine.

" Julia , would want you to live , not fuck yourself over for her.! She is GONE ! She is Just a memory! JUST A FUCKING FANASTY THAT YOU HAD OF TRUE LOVE ! WHY DO YOU KEEP FOOLING YOURSELF THAT SHE LOVED YOU! SHE WAS A WHO-"

Faye's mouth had ran away with her as she screamed and preached at Spike with all the volume her lithe little body could muster. Yet Spike wouldn't dare to let her finish as he charged her body and brought her roughly to the ground , his amber eyes burning like the fires of hell in Faye's eyes.

He body was shaking with a fury so great Spike was losing control of himself. His face was beginning to flush with red hot blood and his teeth were bared like venomous fangs .

" JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP FAYE ! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU KNOW ABOUT LOVE ! I LOVED JULIA AND SHE LOVED ME ! SO FUCKING WHAT IF I CUT MYSELF ! DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO LOVE SOMEONE SO FUCKING MUCH AND YOU CANN'T EVEN BE NEAR THEM! HUH BICTH ! WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU KNOW ABOUT LOVE !

Faye shuddered from where she was pinned between the floor and Spike's body. His hands press hers to the ground in a horizontal fashion. She had never seen Spike so enraged with fury. His amber eyes were like infernos in his skull. Everything in Faye commanded her to look away but she was caught like a helpless doe in his gaze. She couldn't be helpless like this so she allowed the anger in her to take hold .

" I KNOW I LOVE YOU SPIKE! BUT WHAT THE FUCK DOES THSAT MATTER TO AN ARRAGAONT BASTRAD LIKE YOU ! YOU STUPID SON OF A BICTH YOUR SO BUSY CHASING THAT DEAD WHORE THAT YOU CAN'T SEE WHATS RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU! I HATE YOU , I HATE YOU SPIKE , I FUCKING HATE –"

Faye's voice lead off into a whimper. Partly because Spike's gripp had tightened into a pain lock , draining the feeling from her hands and partly because she had told Spike that very deepest feelings to her heart.

Spike's mind was everywhere at once. He wanted to smack Faye across the face for what she had said about Julia. Yet some small part of him wanted so badly to acknowledge she was right and make himself a better man for Faye. Spike's mind was racing and speaking to him in the whispers of 1,000 voices all at voice. And Spike found himself screaming back in reality.

"SHUT UP , SHUT UP , SHUT UP, SHUT UP , SHUT UP ! SHUT UP!"

He was cradled in Faye's arms and his fragile arms were clutching her tightly to his chest , like a child protecting his teddy bear. Somewhere in his mind , Spike could hear Faye crying on his shoulder. Somewhere in his mind Spike knew this was so right , here with Faye when it seemed as though he entire universe had come crashing down around like a falling glass. The Spike gripped onto her tighter and screamed as loud as his voice would allow , letting out all the inner pain he had ever known. Spike was still in a trance when Faye pulled back from his embrace to look in into his blurry eyes. Her soft hands were gently entangled in his hair , caressing like scalp.

" Let me Help you."

Spike didn't respond for in Faye he searching desperately for Julia , trying so hard to find the woman he loved , his face was lifeless and his eyes barely glowing with life. He bowed his face away from Faye's eyes and realized he was never be able to be with Faye without trying to find Julia . Faye didn't deserve that.

No one deserved that.

So Spike concluded he had to die.

"No."

With that the enigma of Spike Spiegel got up and left Faye cold and weeping in the dark halls of Bebop.

888888888888888888

I KNOW THAT ENDING IS REALLY CLIFFY ANFD ALL THAT JAZZ BUT I HAVE TO GO SCHOOL NOW SO MUCH LOVE BYE BYE , AND PUTN IN A REVIEW.

888888888888888888888