Chapter 8—(Kyp)

Women.

I'd never understand them.

Ever.

Jaina Solo was the most contrary, frustrating female in the entire galaxy. I stared at the door of the cabin on board the Jedi Sabre and tried to untangle the intricate web of her actions over the past couple of months. I was happy to have her back in my life. She was the closest friend I had and had been for years. I know she looked upon me the same way…a close friend. I was like a comfortable old shoe to her, someone she could depend on to always be there for her no matter what.

But sometimes she confused me. If I didn't know better, I would maybe think she wanted more from me than friendship. But that was wishful thinking. Surely, it was simply like Li'andra had explained to me that night on my ship.

Jaina and I had kissed that night, although it had been only a brief brush of our lips. When she left me standing there with Li'andra, I wrote it off as what she surely saw it as…a big mistake. Too much brandy and a cozy, romantic atmosphere led us both to do things we wouldn't do normally. I was embarrassed I let it get that far, that I made such a silly presumption as to think she wanted me to kiss her in the first place. She was just lonely for some company…stressed out from work…homesick for something familiar. If I tried to pursue those thoughts about Jaina, I would only end up getting hurt like I had all those years ago.

And I refused to let that happen.

I would not put myself, or Jaina, in a position where she had to choose between me and someone else. That would always be a losing battle for me. And I was too old for those kinds of feelings and desires. I needed to content myself with what I had… my position on the Council and Jaina…as a friend.

But friend or not I wasn't going to take her treatment of me lying down. We both had responsibilities now, regardless of how she felt about Li'andra. I knew the two did not like one another, but I guess I never banked on such intense loathing. True, Jaina had, for some crazy reason, believed I was marrying Li'andra, but what was she thinking shooting me and hauling me off to Force only knew where?

Good question. Where was I going? And what was she going to do with me when we got there? And what about that kiss? Once could be called a mistake, but since I'd been on board her ship, it had happened again two or was it three times? I was losing count.

Something strange was going on and I wanted more answers. This time she wouldn't have a choice.

I shrugged on my shirt, hastily buttoning it up halfway. Then, with a quick wave of my hand, the door slid open and I tromped toward the cockpit with purposeful strides. It didn't take long to get there. I paused in the doorway and glared at the back of her head as she pretended to be busy at the instrument panel. She refused to look at me, but she did speak.

"I'm not talking to you," she stated flatly, still not acknowledging my presence with a glance.

"Oh, yes…you are," I replied firmly, stomping inside to stop right in front of her. I towered over her seated form and she couldn't help but look at me then.

"You're in my way," she said. "And besides, I have nothing to say to you."

This was the Jaina I remembered…stubborn as a Menos mule and fiery as a Mustafar sunset. "I think you do," I said, crossing my arms across my chest.

She stood up, the top of her head barely coming to my chin. Even though she was still just a little slip of a thing, she managed to look halfway intimidating.

"No, really, I don't," she answered, her nostrils flaring in defiance. "Look," she said, poking a finger into my chest, "if you want to ruin your life by hooking up in whatever twisted, disgusting, little way with Miss-Kiss-the-Ground-I-Walk-On, then go right ahead. I was only trying to be a good friend since I lo-lo--," she stopped herself to recover from whatever she was about to say. Her finger dropped and she clenched her jaw. "If you want to go back, that's fine." Now she was talking sense. We didn't have time to be wasting. "When I stop to refuel, you can hitch a ride back to Denon and your beloved Li'andra. There now. Happy? Conversation over."

Then she pushed past me to check on another set of controls, and once again it was as if I didn't exist. Oh, the memories. Visions of a rooftop picnic with her and Jag Fel flashed through my mind. Never had I been so humiliated as when Jaina, upstart teenager, made it painfully clear that she was off-limits, in front of her upstart young boyfriend.

Hitch a ride? Conversation over? Not quite! Suddenly, it all became clear to me. I plopped down into the co-pilot's chair and propped my long legs up onto the console.

"I think Li' was right about you," I ventured, refusing to be ignored. And it worked. I noticed her hands cease immediately and her back stiffen.

"Oh, yeah?" she said, not turning to face me.

"Yes. You, Jaina Solo, are selfish and spoiled."

That got her attention. Not only was she now facing me, but she was mere inches from my face. I could see the flames dancing in her dark eyes.

"She said that about me!" she yelled.

I slid my legs off of the panel and stood. It was about time all of this came out into the open. When Li'andra had explained her observations to me about Jaina that night on my ship, I hadn't wanted to listen, probably because deep down, I knew it was true.

"Sure did," I continued, anger now fueling me. "And I can see it now. You were so afraid that someone else was going to take my attention away from you that you decided to kidnap me. I've just always been there for you, loyal and dependable…your whipping boy. You didn't want me as anything more, yet you couldn't stand the thought of not having me around lavishing you with attention. Jag was out of the picture and you were feeling the need to lead someone else around by the nose. So you thought, 'Hey! There's always Kyp. He'll always be around. He doesn't have anyone else, so I'll just go hang out with him for a while…or at least until something better comes along.' Right?" I asked, almost enjoying the astonished look on her face. Why hadn't I realized it before? It was so obvious, just like Li'andra said. It had only taken Li' a few weeks to figure Jaina out. In my case, it had taken years.

Jaina was just using me.

Sith, the truth hurt!

After a few moments of silence, Jaina finally responded…and surprisingly she was rather calm. "She said all those things about me?"

I nodded an affirmative.

"And you believe her?" she asked, an unfamiliar expression changing her face. She almost looked…sad, as I stared at her in silence.

"Do you believe those things about me, Kyp?" she repeated.

My confidence was wavering, but I didn't want her to know it. "I said them, didn't I?" I answered.

She stared deeply into my eyes, sizing me up, searching for something, though I didn't know what.

"Then you're not the man I thought you were."

Suddenly, an alert sounded and she turned to locate the source. It was an incoming message from Denon. She pushed a few buttons, and, in a moment, Kenth Hamner's voice sounded in the cockpit.

"Jaina, I'm glad I got a hold of you. Do you by chance know where Kyp is? I've been trying to reach you both all day."

"I'm here, Kenth," I chimed in.

"Kyp?" he replied, the surprise evident in his voice. "You two are… together?"

"Yeah, well, long story," I added. Jaina looked at me curiously, wondering, I'm sure, if I would reveal how exactly we had ended up together. And I did…from a certain point of view. "We, uh, heard a rumor about the Alpha Red case and decided to check it out," I explained, hoping the Force wouldn't strike me down for stretching the truth a little.

Kenth seemed satisfied and continued.

"Well, good, because that's exactly why I'm calling. We have had a major breakthrough in the Alpha Red case. Dif Scaur has been located on Nar Shaddaa and our information tells us he's negotiating a deal to sell the plans for the formula. I don't need to tell you how devastating it could be if Alha Red is produced again and released into any world's environment. We already witnessed the consequences during the latter years of the war, if you recall. However, despite the proven negative effects, many people see it as a last resort to rid their worlds of those lingering pockets of hostile Yuuzhan Vong. And still others hope to modify Alpha Red so it can be used on their race of choice…the ultimate weapon.

"We've been tracking Scaur since he was removed from his position with intelligence, assuming he would eventually try something like this. I suppose he thinks it's been long enough since the war ended that it's safe now to sell his secrets. I'm sure you'll both agree, he has to be stopped. So, Kyp, as head of the Council, our next move is your call."

How was that for snapping you back to reality? I took a deep breath and looked at Jaina. All the animosity of only minutes before was pushed aside as we both focused solely on the objective at hand. With a quick nod from her, I knew that she would do whatever needed to be done to stop Dif Scaur from selling Alpha Red.

"You're right, Kenth," I said. "He does have to be stopped. Since Jaina and I are already on the move, we'll take this one. Just send the coordinates of his location and the necessary details to Jaina's ship's computer. I'll contact you when we get there."

"You got it," Kenth replied, "and may the Force be with you both. Hamner out."

Jaina flipped off the communicator and sank back into the pilot's chair. "Wow. The thought of what could happen…it's frightening."

"You're not kidding," I added.

Another beep sounded alerting us that the information Kenth promised had arrived. She checked the readout and I noticed the amused arch of her eyebrows. "How original. They're meeting on Nar Shaddaa, the Smuggler's Moon. I've never been there, but Dad has told me plenty of stories."

"Yeah, well, I've been there and you're not missing anything. It's the armpit of the galaxy. But I suppose it makes sense that Scaur would go there. Their motto is 'What happens on Nar Shaddaa, stays on Nar Shaddaa.'"

"Nice," she added with a chuckle.

"The people who go there aren't sightseeing. You only go there if you have illegal business to conduct or you want to get lost for a while," I explained, staring off into space.

Jaina looked at me with a smirk. "So, which was it for you?"

The question caught me totally off-guard. I had not talked about that dark period of my life with anyone and I didn't want to now. Knowing Jaina, if I didn't answer, she'd find out somehow anyway. I decided to give her enough to quench her curiosity for now and hope she dropped the subject.

"I did a bit of soul searching after I…after my brother died. I needed to get away for a while, somewhere I wouldn't be judged every time I walked outside."

She glanced away uncomfortably. Yeah, I had made some pretty bad mistakes in my life.

"That was a rough time for you, wasn't it?" she asked. "I remember Dad trying to explain it all to me."

I stared at her. "You couldn't have been more than three or four, and you remember that?" I was surprised.

"Well, you have to remember, I was advanced for my age." Then she smiled, that gorgeous, lopsided Solo type of grin, and I suddenly regretted our earlier argument. Maybe I had been wrong to believe Li'andra.

Yes, I was once again confused by Jaina Solo. One minute she's yelling at me, then she's near tears, and now she was joking around. My head hurt from trying to figure her out.

I'd do it later.

"So, you better get this ship turned around and head for Nar Shaddaa," I suggested, perusing the readout of information she passed to me. "We've got four days to get there and set up operations." I waited for her to agree, and, when she didn't, I put down the flimsiplast printout and glanced over at her. She had this odd expression on her face… as if she were guilty or embarrassed. "You are going to Nar Shaddaa, right?"

"Well, yeah," she said, "just not right now. We've got to refuel first or we'll never make it that far. I kind of forgot to fill up before we left. I was under a lot of stress," she explained sheepishly.

"You have got to be kidding," I laughed, as I began to massage my throbbing temples. "What? You could remember to bring a blaster to stun me with, but you couldn't remember to fill up! Typical female," I mumbled shaking my head in disbelief. Guess I shouldn't have said that.

The look she shot me could have killed and reminded me that she wasn't very happy with me to begin with. She opened her mouth to let me have it, but then closed it, took a deep breath and calmed herself. Finally, she spoke.

"Get out of my cockpit," she demanded quietly. "No, let me rephrase that. It would really be to your benefit and mine if you would go back to the cabin and stay out of my way. We'll be stopping to refuel in about two hours. Once we're finished, we'll be on our merry way to Nar Shaddaa. In the meantime, you could make yourself useful and go over those readouts from Kenth. Come up with a game plan for us. But for now, I really need to be away from you."

Wow. She said all that without raising her voice. Impressive.

Part of me wanted to argue. I was the higher up, here…for a change. She had no right to order me around, but something told me that I'd better leave. We were, after all, on her ship, even though, in my case, it was not by choice. So, I made a smart move for once.

I left.