LK: thank you to my reviewers! Luv u all! Not like that, don't worry, sorry I'm in a weird mood today ppl, so just DEAL. Yeah, well, here u go!

Disclaimer: Ya da, ya da, ya da. U know the drill.

Chapter Three: "Oh Yes we're Men in Tights (tight tights.)

~ Diary Entry: George Cooper of Pirate's Swoop, exasperated with the women in his family. ~

Oh dear. Alanna's in a fuss again. She's been muttering in her sleep and it's keeping me awake. She mutters about knives and grand... oh no. he didn't run off... again... (Censor, sorry jay, PG. ^_^) He did. Dang. I pity the boy. I wonder what it will take to get that off of Alanna's mind... I will not allow her to go looking for him... she's getting too old to do that... I'll take her somewhere quiet. It'll be hard, but I can do it. My subjects, all right, fine, household depends on me, whether they admit it or not. Oh well, time to talk to the old girl.

~ Diary Entry: Numair, Master Mage of Tortall, who is COMPLETELY unfazed. ~

Women. They make such a big deal out of everything. So Sarras is gone. She'll come back, no doubt about it. And if she doesn't, well, she's old enough to fend for herself by now; so why not? (Censor. Anyone noticing a trend?) That stupid bird man is here again. What does he want I suppose? Nawat around is one thing, but this guy is just WEIRD. Ah, well, I had better go see what he wants.

~ sorry, but Aly is still teaching Nawat to write, but he is only concerned about Aly, bugs, and Aly at the moment. Yeah. ~