Making
7th day, 8th month, standard year 24934
When I woke up I knew something was different or wrong somehow. I had to flick back through the journal before I worked out what.
One year ago my Master died.
I meditated. I was hoping, just hoping, that I'd hear him, maybe even see him...it's not unheard of for things like that to happen, even if everyone says it's only in imaginations that dead people are heard. But imagination or not, I just wanted to hear him...
I didn't. I didn't tell my Master that was why I meditated so long. I went to my room and lit a candle, and then went to the star-map room. I found myself looking at Avino for ages.
*****
8th day, 8th month, standard year 24934
This is going to take some explaining.
I went to lightsabre class...According to Tahl, Dilan and Vulna were teasing her and I tried to stop them and that led to me and Dilan having a fight. (Master Kiloxan-our lightsabre teacher- isn't impressed, was another thing she said). And Dilan knocked me out, apparently. I woke up in the healer's.
I was tired but they all said I could go if I wanted, so I went, and I went down the corridor and I passed the star-map room, and in my mind I saw Avino. I saw a woman clutching a child. I saw devastation.
I saw my Master- I suppose I got my wish to hear or see him again after all-holding a bright red lightsabre, and I saw him in a furious rage, murdering and destroying...and it seemed like a nightmare I couldn't wake from, and it had to be a nightmare, it had to be...
It isn't, is it?
Force, it isn't.
*****
It's night time. The thunderstorm Tahl mentioned was raging all day.
After what happened I went straight to Tahl. She listened, probably at first thinking I had lost it, and then slowly I saw horror come into her eyes.
"A red blade," she mused urgently. "That means that blade has been used to kill in anger or cruelty or revenge....Gods...are you completely sure about this?"
"Yes," I said, feeling sick and anxious. The feelings that I felt on Avino, they were coming back with twice their power.
"Maybe I should..." For some reason I thought she was about to turn and abandon me. She didn't.
She tried again. "Do you think...."
"Something's going on," I said. I hoped I wouldn't throw up. Have you noticed I do that a lot? I probably have a weak stomach or something. "You're really good at research, Tahl. I want....I want to know what's happening...what happened on Avino." And then I remembered my Master, desperation all over him, saying to me "Be strong, my little one." and walking away...
...walking away from me...
...walking away to die...
I wanted to take back the words I'd just said,
but nothing would let me. And Tahl nodded. "I'll do my best...."
*****
It's now six hours later. Night-time. Tahl called. "I've found something out. Do you know any people called Mynarta and Ranleo...Mynarta and Ranleo Karshan?"
My heart sank and I whispered "No."
"You'd better sleep. I'll see you in the morning, alright?" She sounded like she'd do anything to not have to tell me what she was going to have to tell me.
Obviously, I'm not asleep.
*****