48. Quiet Days
6th day, 9th month, standard year 29436
A conversation:
"So...did Yoda speak to you again?"
"Yes."
"What did he have to say? About the Sith and Lorian and....all?"
He paused for a very long moment, and finally said:
"It isn't your business to know, Padawan Learner."
And so it wasn't.
*****
8th day, 9th month, standard year 29436
Master Karshan was just here.
Or perhaps he wasn't. It had to have been another nightmare. But it was real...so insanely real. I was standing in a wassteland...a blazing hot wasteland....and I remember thinking that it must be a nightmare, and trying in vain to wake myself up. I remember the fear when I realised everything was real. I didn't know where I was, and I didn't think I'd be able to escape. There were no buildings and no lights. I could see an infinity of stars and planets....and felt nothing. No connection of either hope or despair. Then I realized something else...the Force was gone. There was no more light inside me. No more feeling. Something inside of me had gone.
Then Master Karshan was there, with a white aura
all around him. He smiled at me. I smiled back...and then we were both
in my room, which seemed twisted and different, as if it was someone else's
room now. He looked at me, looked around the room, and started to fade
away slowly.
Then he was gone and I awoke with a yell. Master
Dooku did not hear me yelling.
*****
1st day, winter fete, standard year 24937
Today was one of the first relaxing days we've had for ages. We'd had a mission...a long and, as my Master says, slightly dull one...(although...it took us to a beautiful forest moon where we got to spend several days sleeping underneath trees...I enjoyed it, but I'm not so sure if Master did)..and there was a lightsabre tournament, which I didn't win. I came fifth instead.
Anyway, Master was in a strange mood today. He had stolen a huge pile of paper from somewhere and was busy writing...poetry and all sorts of things that Master Yoda might have declared to be nonsense, but I thought were pretty good. I mentioned that to him.
"You can have a go," he told me. "I ought to use up all the paper anyway."
So I did.
Actually, I wrote two. And I read them out to him...I was nervous about it too, strangely enough.
the night is over, here's the sun
there is an all inside the one
i am yours, and you are mine
til friendships start to die with time...
the sun goes in, it starts to rain
perhaps we could begin again
night falls, but there is not a star
everything has gone too far...
but after night there is another day
let it come soon
and show us the way.
He was surprised. His eyes widened. "Not bad, not bad..." he said. "I must be honest, I didn't know you had it in you."
Encouraged, I read the other one:
you haven't smiled for so long
i'm sorry, friend, but i am gone
i see you walking in the rain
you want us to be two again...
you think that no-one hears you cry
you think we've said our last goodbye
you hope and pray that you are wrong
listen, child, hear my song...
for through i am no longer here
i watch over you
i'm always near
His lips moved along with the words I read. "I like it. I like them both. I fear you may have more talent than me, in fact." He crumpled up the piece of paper he was writing on and threw it towards the waste disposal at the other side of the room. It missed.
"I'm sure that's not true." I said.
"Oh, it is. Yoda always discouraged expressing onself."
I nodded. Then he went off to the refresher, and I pulled some of the papers towards me, hoping that he wouldn't mind.
Most of them only had one line on them (What a waste of paper...) One of those lines, however, caught my eye:
If not a Jedi
?????
I wondered what it meant, but then he came back and I never asked him.
*****