51. Slowly Fading Stars
32rd day,2nd month, standard year 29437
I wonder about Vulna sometimes. I really do. Maybe it's even more worrying than wondering. He was caught cheating on a test today, by Master Mapru no less. So outside in the corridor, just now, a loud arguement between Mapru, Vulna, and Amiri just took place. With my Master joining in. Actually, he joined in the loudest, come to think of it. As soon as he heard them, he stormed out of the door and told me to stay here and not get involved. So I didn't. But Amiri...I think she's crying. I can't stay in here no matter what he says. I'm going out to see her.
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She was upset. But - here's the thing...she didn't even mention to Vulna that he shouldn't have been cheating...she didn't say anything about it at all. Vulna did look guilty and he was trying to comfort her...but it's just, if she doesn't say a word to him about it, he might do it again. Maybe she was going to talk to him after we had gone, but I don't know.
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Master came in here just now and sat down on a chair.
"They worry me," he said, echoed my own thoughts.
"Amiri and Vulna?"
"Of course. Who else?" He adjusted his tunic. "Master Mapru...I use the term Master loosly...will undoubtably tell the rest of the Council about this, especially because of Vulna's past record...and what will Amiri do then?" He sighed. "It's not unheard of for the Council to part Padawans from their Masters...rare, but not unheard of. And what will Amiri do then? She loves that boy," Something clicked in me then.
"She really does, doesn't she?"
"Yes."
We were both silent, wondering.
"Master...don't take this as a criticism towards Amiri, because I don't mean it in the way you...might think I do, but...why is she a Jedi? She seems...unsuited for it, Master."
He shook his head slowly. "It's my fault, Padawan. She was ready to go to the Agricorps...she wanted to. But I convinced her otherwise. I wanted her to stay...with Lorian gone I had so few friends. She took pity on me and stayed, bound to a life where she sees things she should never see and does things she should never do. I destroyed her innocence."
He rose from the chair and stood by the door, obviously wondering what course of action he should take.
"The Council wouldn't really seperate them, would they?" I asked. "The Force..."
"How do you know they listen to the Force?" he said, in a voice both fearful and bitter. "How do you know they haven't decided, somewhere along the way, that they know better?"
I didn't want to believe that. "Master, nothing has happened yet. No-one's been seperated from anyone. And it's possible that nothing will happen...we'll just have to be patient."
I wondered what his reaction to that would be, but after a few seconds he smiled and sat back down again.
"Wise you are becoming, Padawan," he said. Then
he looked immensely annoyed. "I mean...you are becoming wise. Very
wise indeed."
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5th day, 3rd month, standard year 24937
Birthday celebrations were more subdued than usual, mostly because of Vulna's sullenness. Yoda spoke to him. So did Vione. So did the whole Council, in fact. I can just see Mapru's gloating face from here.
Master tells me I'm getting too old for birthday celebrations anyway. Perhaps he's right.
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15th day, 4th month, standard year 29437
I think Vulna's up to something. I just can't work out what. He's acting all strange and sulky...more than usual, I mean. I've heard the Masters speak about him...'behaviour unbecoming of a Jedi' 'what are we doing to do about him?' and so on. I'm worried. Master says I shouldn't be, that all this is just a phrase he's going through and he's going to stop soon enough...and he added that Vulna would never be consumed by the Darkside anyway.
"What makes you say that?"
"Because he doesn't seem to care enough. Not about light...and not about dark."
He had a point there. A very good point. A Jedi didn't just listen to the Force, he or she loved it...and by default loved everything that was. Vulna did not. I also realised in the moment that maybe a lot of people did not. I remembered what Master had said about the Council. It was a strange thought. It didn't seem to scare me or anything, it was just...strange.
I went to the star-map room eventually, to meditate. There was no-one else there...just me and a load of stars. I watched them and wondered, and my mind kept drifting. Towards Nert's Cafe. I didn't know what it could mean. Would Dilan be there? Would something have happened to Didi or Nert? Either way, it seemed the Force was...is...asking me to go there. So that's where I'm going.
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Dilan was there. I saw him. I don't know what to do....
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