Chapter 10 – Gordo's mind and heart (Oh wow I swear I never get to write anything anymore. Just when I think my life can't get anymore stressful...it does. I have so many money issues its not even funny and I'm in fear of losing my job. My best friend got laid off today and he has money issues as well. As soon as one thing passes 5 more things get dumped into my lap. My grandmother has moved into a rehab program where she is getting treated better and looks to be close to getting to go home. Emily's friends recovered from the accident and are doing well now. Emily and I are no longer involved however. She is a great person and I have no ill will towards her. I wish her nothing but well wishes in life and I hope that no matter where life takes her I hope she finds happiness. I honestly don't know if this chapter is very good or not. I wrote it simply as a way to get my mind off everything. As always any and all well wishes and prayers would be greatly appreciated as well as any reviews you would like to post. Anything to lift my spirits right now. You guys are always so great and I appreciate it so much.

Love, faith and understanding will save us all,

James)

Lizzie cautiously opened her back porch door. She was weary of flying objects as her eyes searched for Gordo. She spotted him sitting on the grass with his back and head resting against the tool shed. Lizzie noticed him shaking and mumbling too himself as she approached him. The blonde girl said nothing but took a seat next to the stressed young man.

"Hey," she greeted him softly.

"Hey," he responded meekly.

"So what's up?" Lizzie questioned.

"Nothing," he responded flatly.

"Well umm ok," the teen sighed frustrated by his quick answers.

"What do you want Lizzie?" he asked.

"I just wanna make sure you are ok," she admitted.

"I'm fine," the curly haired boy snapped.

"No your not! Look at you, you're shaking," she pointed out to him.

Gordo turn his head away from her and responded, "I'm cold."

"No you're not. Gordo its 80 degrees out here and you are wearing 2 shirts," Lizzie corrected Gordo.

"So," the boy barely voiced as he was still suffering from the yelling match.

The young beauty would not be denied. She reached out and took his hand. When he didn't face her she squeezed it and pulled him closer to her. When he gave in and looked into her eyes she told him, "don't think you can get out of this by being a jerk. I don't scare so easy. We need to talk about this Gordo."

"No we don't and you can save the saint Lizzie act McGuire. I don't need a guardian angel," he responded as the pain showed in his voice and in his eyes.

"Gordo, I'm your friend and I care about you, a lot. Look I know right now you like everyone is just out to hurt you. This has to be so hard on you. I can't pretend to know what you are going through but there is something I can do, something I can give you." She informed him.

"What's that?" the blued eyed young man wondered.

Lizzie smiled and answered, "me."

Gordo raised an eyebrow and inquired, "You? Lizzie I don't see what you are getting at."

"Yes me, you can vent at me...you can cry on my shoulder...you can ask me for advice. Gordo if you just need me to listen then I can do that. If you need a hug then I can do that. If you need me to be your pillar of strength to lean on emotionally or literally then I can do that too. I'm not going to leave you like he did. I'm gonna be right here beside you, always." Lizzie explained.

"Lizzie...I can't talk to you about what just happened because I don't know what just happened. I don't know what Miranda was so mad about and I don't know how I made it worse. I don't know why she started yelling at me and I don't know why she has decided to blame me for all this. It hurts, She and I aren't as close as you and me are but I still think of her as a sister and it just hurts for her to blame me like this." He answered. Up until now he had not noticed that she was still holding onto his hand. Gordo repositioned their hands by holding her hand in the traditional interlocked position. Lizzie placed her side against his and he allowed his weight to rest against her.

"What are you doing?" she questioned. Not that she really minded, she enjoyed him being this comfortable with her.

"I'm letting you be my pillar of strength," he voiced.

"That doesn't mean leaning on me, you're heavy," she joked.

"No more than you are," the boy jabbed back.

"Gordo this is taking a lot out of you. I can see it in your eyes." Lizzie stated getting back to why she was there.

"Yeah Lizzie it is. With all this going on at the same time...I'm so stressed out...and it's like every time I think it can't get any worse, it does. I just feel so helpless. I'm so used to always being level headed and in control and there is nothing about this I can control. I don't know what to do and it's driving me crazy. I wanna just go crawl under a rock and hide but I can't. I have to keep going, move on. It's just so hard to start and Miranda isn't helping anything. There is a part of me that wants to go hug her and tell her that it's all gonna be ok and we are gonna make it through this but I can't because I'm so mad at her right now. Can't anything go right and be good for me right now?" Gordo vented, as small tears rolled down his cheeks.

Lizzie reached out with her free hand and wiped away the tears that were now around his chin. She then placed it against his cheek and reminded him that, "I'm good for you."

Gordo acted on instinct and kissed the hand resting on his cheek. His heart jumped as his oldest friend responded by smiling at him.

"I know Lizzie, I know." Gordo answered simply. He stood and released her hand.

"Well, I better go check on Miranda," Lizzie concluded as she stood herself. She had started walking towards the house when Gordo's hand stopped her.

"Lizzie wait," he requested not really sure of what he was doing.

"Yes?" she replied as she turned to face him. Before he could stop himself, the curly headed young man kissed the blonde beauty's lips.

"Thank you," Gordo voiced honestly and gratefully. Lizzie began to blush and gave a nod that meant you're welcome. She continued her walk into the house as he followed her a few steps behind. As Lizzie went upstairs Gordo joined Matt and Sam on the couch watching TV.