Spoilers: Shaken…which btw, my favorite SVU episode of all time.

Elliot POV

Look at him, so smug. Even that smile makes my skin crawl. Kathy at least seems to be interested in whatever he's jabbering on about…or pretending to be interested. How polite. Oh, Maureen is absolutely taken by him. Eh, maybe it's love. Kathleen won't even look up at me, fantastic. Dickie's keeping pretty quiet. And Lizzie looks like she's ready to explode. Those eyes, so full of life…..not like that little girl….stop…just go back to what's his face boring us to death….

"So, Mr. Stabler….I hear you're a cop."

Cop. Cop, that word…sounds so condescending. "I'm a detective, with the Special Victims Unit. But you can dumb it down and say cop, sure. Oh and call me Elliot." Play time. Kathy, don't gimmie that look….I love this part.

"Right, Elliot it is. So, you investigate sex crimes, abuse, that sort of sick thing?"

What's he getting at. "You got it. So, what do you wanna know? Not exactly good dinner conversation…"

"Well, I bet you question and, what's the term, collar….lots of innocent people?"

"Jason. Back off. Not wise." Maureen, coming to the rescue. That's right sweetie. Spare him from the slaughter.

"No Maureen. It's fine. And the term is collar. Done your homework. Inspiring really. And I don't collar innocent people. I collar rapists, pedophiles, and abusive boyfriends….girlfriends….husbands….wives….what have you."

"But aren't they all innocent until proven guilty?"

What a scumbag. "No…because I have the evidence to prove their guilt. And if they would just confess, it would make my job a lot easier. But no, they just get a call some scumbag attorney, who tries to get them off on same lame ass excuse, like their parents didn't love them…my daddy hates me. Some crap like that."

"Isn't really crap if a jury buys it? I don't think…"

"See, there's your problem. Right there."

"cough Like I was saying….I don't think it's crap. But really…I know what pisses you of…the fact that someone would buy it. Look, those people have rights too."

Nail his ass to the wall. "Yeah, actually. The right to remain silent. That anything they say can and will be used against them in a court of law. They have the right to an attorney. In the event they cannot afford one, one will be appointed to them. Do you understand these rights as I have read them to you….Jason." Wow, I'm so hateful, but he deserves it. "Innocent people, huh. The only people innocent in all of it, are the victims."

"You say that a lot, don't ya Dad?" Maureen, trying to cut the tension.

"More often than I want to, baby girl. And sometimes, I do feel for the people. I'm not heartless. There was this woman, lost her husband, and her daughter was in a coma. Turns out she, um, had shaken her daughter, Lucy, so hard that….Lucy died from it. sigh I understood her frustration, a screaming child, drives you crazy."

"Amen." Thanks, Kath. You above ALL know.

"But, I had to arrest her. Lucy was only being kept alive because of life support. We, meaning the courts, finally convinced her to let Lucy go. I prayed for the woman. Lord knows she needed."

"I can't say that if I was in her place, my child lying there, I would have an easy time…letting go. I'm sure she appreciated the thought El." Me too Kath, but if you only knew.

"Geez Dad. That's awful. So, she lost her husband, accidentally killed her baby out of frustration, and now she's in jail for the rest of her life. Huh. I just guess I don't get people that hurt their own kids you know?"

She couldn't…nah. It's just guilt Stabler. She was WAY too young. Look at that face, how could I…guess I'll always think that.

"Kids will make you crazy. You, my dear, were a handful."

"I'll say. Maybe it was because you were our first." Thanks, major points for the you tonight, Kathy. Damn, she is amazing. Each time I look at her, I fall in love with her all over again. Wonder if anyone has noticed that smile on my face….

"Ewww, DAD! Quit it! I know what you're thinking." Apparently Kathleen has.

"Oh, so now just looking at your mother means something more?"

"Yeah, it does!" Wow, she really is pissed. Guess it really makes her feel uncomfortable.

"Kathleen, right?"

"Yeah it is turd bucket…what?"

HAH!….Turd bucket…damn…oh, he has something to say.

"Yeah….I'm going to ignore that. But what I was gonna say is that your parents are obviously and hopelessly in love. Love makes you act…different."

First smart thing he's said all night. You know, it's nice to hold her hand and just okay…after what's gone on today. Look at that guy…I see the way he looks at Maureen…keep it up jerk-wad…I'll rip out your eyeballs and feed them to you.

"Oh yeah? Well…."

"Kathleen…that's enough."

"Oh no Dad. Everyone needs to know….Well, we I arrived home from school, I found my obvious in love parents on the couch….together…"

Every eye in the room is on us. Suddenly I don't feel so comfortable myself. Maureen has an evil grin. Uh oh….I have the look…can't be good.

"Nice, Kat. So, you busted Dad and Mom getting "all friendly" on the couch! Hope you kept her quite Dad…I remember this one time when I was about seven or so…"

"Oh Maureen! Stop…I'm trying to keep my food down."

Wasn't that bad Kat. Geez.

"So that's why Daddy had lipstick on his face when I jumped on his lap!" Thanks Lizzie…well Son? Got something to add?

"That's what you meant! Makes sense! Huh, now you know what me and Faith felt like!"

Traitor. But, well, Maureen looks confused…

"His girlfriend, Faith and he were discovered in a closet today."

"Aww, that's so cute. So, is she totally hot? 'Cause I know you said you only wanted to date hot chicks?"

"Can I go now? I don't want to talk about it." And he's off. No words…just marches up stairs. He's got my temper. Could be bad.

"I'll go talk to him. I'll make him laugh." Sweet girl, Lizzie. Always good…loves her brother.

Back to me then. "Well, I guess that leaves us adults to chat then."

"OH! I GET IT!" Kathleen, the drama queen. Not her nickname for nothing.

"Kat, sit down. Your father was including you." Man, another one. She's on a roll. But something else is up with her…I can see it. Something's up….maybe someone will get to it…

"So, Kat, what about Nick? I haven't heard you even mention him." Maureen, nice…forgot about her boyfriend. She changes them about as often as you do…oh, the boyfriend…wait, oh, that one. He's a sleeze…great.

"Nick? Great. He's just freakin' peachy!" Now I know something's going on. She worships that boy. Practically need a bucket to catch the drool.

"He looked REAL happy last I saw him today. But then again he was laughing at me."

Happy? Almost like he was doing something wrong….with someone else…it has to be. Oh well…what's the worst that could happened. "Kat, he was with some other girl wasn't he…and you probably think he has been for awhile now. And it seemed like everyone could see it but you. Only, you found it out the hard way. You saw him with her didn't you?"

Look at her…I must be right. Either that or I'm really losing it.

"With her? Oh yeah. With her in a biblical sense. sniffle And all he could say was "what…had to get it somewhere baby cakes."

"Kat…I'm sorry, but…"

"God, Dad. Way to go uber cop! Why do you have to do that all the time? Put it all together? Ah, you're ruining my life!" And she's off….I know that hurt her. Hurt her more, and now I'm responsible for some of that pain. But on the plus side…got some other idiot to threaten.

"Another dinner, another Kathleen hissy fit. She's always don't that. Don't worry….oh wow, we need to get going. Jason's got some papers to write."

Oh and leave the fun. Papers to write…more like study anatomy. Little bastard probably knows every square inch of her….she's under his spell. I can see it. That scares me. I bet she'd kill for him. Hey…I'd kill him for her…somehow I don't think that would go over well.

"Come on, I'll see you two out." Probably need to steam clean that chair. Better yet…let's burn it. She likes him, but he's still worthless.

"Thanks for being on your best behavior Daddy." Maureen, my sweet baby. You have know idea how good it feels just to have you hug me. Oh, that's a lovely hickey….man, well, I suppose if that's all you got. "Take care of yourself old man, okay?"

Why does everyone keep saying that? "Sure thing." Now…to make my day. "Jason. A word." This is the best part. Oh, look….he's terrified.

"Elliot. Look, I know we got off on the wrong foot, but I just want you to know where I stand. I really care about Maureen. She's a beautiful woman. You and your wife did a great job raising her. She's the greatest woman I've ever met. And just know that I would NEVER do anything to hurt her."

Wow, how about that? Little slime-ball has a heart. "Let's just make this clear. You break her….and, I swear to God, I will rip the heart from your chest and show it to you. Get me?"

"Yes sir. Crystal clear. And I hope to never break anything about Maureen."

As much as I want to hate him, I can't. "See you around Jason. You're always welcome here." Shake hands…close the door. God, I feel like I need a shower…oh well, back to more pleasant things.