Two funerals, two days.
The thorn was piercing her flesh and the blood dripping down her finger began to match the color of the rose's dark, red petals. Padme was watching close by.
"Guil, Guil don't hurt yourself anymore. This wasn't your fault, and you just need to move on…I did."
Guil flung the rose at Padme's feet in an unexpected burst of anger. This was atypical, for Guil's emotions were usually that of quietness, as if in a daydream, as if all the events that occurred the day before weren't real, had never happened.
"You moved on? You never even loved him! How can you stand there and put on the act that you ever cared for Wengo the way that I did? Do you understand the torment I had to go through, the torment of seeing you with him, using him? Don't stand there and act as if you're the saint, I know you Padme. Yesterday you cared nothing for Wengo as he lied there dead, just Anakin!"
Padme said nothing as she picked up the now bruised rose, colored with the blood of Guil's finger. She looked straight at Guil, and after a brief pause, handed her the rose.
"You're right. I never loved Wengo, but I didn't use him. When I was with him I finally realized that I cared for Anakin, and Guil, I'm sorry, I'm sorry for all the agony my actions have caused you."
Guil looked unrelenting, her swollen eyes studying the woman in front of her, her hand outstretched with the rose.
She accepted it. As she did so she erupted with a stream of tears…
They said nothing, for there was an understanding bond between the two women. Truthfully, they had both lost the men they loved, just in different ways. Guil lost Wengo physically, and Padme lost Anakin emotionally. This wasn't Anakin, this was Darth Vader. She remembered when she first heard that name spoken…
"Guil do you have any idea where we might be able to find Anakin and Darth Sidious? Had they given any clue, any plan to you that might be used to our advantage?" said Master Windu.
Guil sat there thinking. Her mind was still jumbled up; Wengo was just killed moments earlier. It took her a great deal of concentration to even listen and interpret what the Jedi was asking her. After a few moments she answered with a shake of the head.
"He's dead."
The council looked at each other uncomfortably.
"Yes, we understand that Master Jeywill's Padawan Wengo Eetlai has—"
"No. Not him. Not Wengo. Anakin's dead."
Padme was confused when she heard this. She knew that Anakin wasn't dead, she saw with her own two eyes him leaving the corridor and board a ship. She even saw the ship leave the planet until it was just a tiny spec in the sky.
"What do you mean, Guil? Anakin was killed?"
She sat there, dewy eyed.
"There is no Anakin, not the Anakin we knew. Just…Darth Vader."
Padme hated that name. It brought chills up her spine at the mere thought of it. It felt hard, metallicy when you spoke it, like steel, shiny black steel.
She slipped her arm through Guil's whose tears had stopped pouring out. The warm sun was shining on them, drying up their hair whose tears had made them damp. The grass was soft and green, just like the grass in Naboo, and the animals were singing away gaily. It was the opposite of what they felt inside, and their surroundings put no drop of happiness in their hearts.
Padme held the rose with Guil and together they threw it on Wengo's pyre. She kissed Guil's cheek and hugged her gently. Still, no words were spoken. None were needed.
As they watched the fire touch the sky, Guil felt a tap on her shoulder. She turned to see a young girl, about the age of 8, who went by the name of Chrisamine Moorin. She was born a slave on Tatooine like Anakin, but she had never known her parents for they had died before she was born. Her Master had died, making her free, but being only at the tender age of 6, she did not know what to do. An anonymous family found her and brought her to the temple, hoping she would be Force-sensitive. She wasn't, but she begged to stay. The council agreed to let her live with the helpers around the temple and she learned to do the jobs of helping with the cooking and tidying up.
As she looked up at the blue haired Jedi, she began to speak, "Excuse me miss, I was told to give this to you." She held up a bulky letter and continued, "Mr. Wengo is a friend of mine," She pointed at the pyre with sad eyes, a tear sliding down her cheek. Her voice began to break as she continued speaking, "And he talked to me a lot about you. Every time we talked, really all he'd talk about is you. I think he liked you a lot." This made Guil smile. "He was really serious to me one day and he told me that if anything ever happened to him, if he was ever killed or if he died not married to you, that I should give you this here letter." She handed it over to her.
"Thank you, Chrisamine," and gave her a genuine smile, one that hadn't been used in a very long while, on that reached her eyes.
"What is it, Guil?"
It was a curious thing, the letter. It was crinkled, as if opened many times before. The sides were ripped but the name on the front was written perfectly, and just as the girl had said was the name 'Guil Joba'.
She opened it with inquisitive fingers.
Inside was a small piece of parchment, wrinkled as much as the envelope was. Guil unfolded it and as she read the first line, her face contorted into a mix of pure happiness and surprise. It read-
Guil, Guil, how I miss you. I always have, and now that I'm gone, I know that I could never have the courage to tell you this in my living form, and since I have lost that chance, this is all that's left: a measly letter. It's the most I can tell you how much I love you, I'm sorry I never told you in person, never made the attempt to take you back.
You're the sweet dreams that soothe me when I can't fall asleep. You're the field in the middle of the city, rushing by the speed of life. You're the strong resolution when I find no peace…When all is quiet you whisper comfort that lifts my heart and gets so weak.
Guil, you're the center of my universe.
A million ways cannot explain. You're the soft words that touch me when I just can't speak, the breeze from the ocean in the morning, minding near to keep the day. I understand there may be grace and there may be pain, but I'm aware you blind the darkness. It's who you are.
If ever you wondered if you touched my soul, you do. Since I met you I'm not the same, a day hasn't gone by when I haven't thought of you, your hair, your smile, your laugh. You bring life to everything I do. Just the way you say hello brings me over the edge. The thought of not being with you makes my stomach turn over - my mouth goes dry. I feel dizzy. I can't breathe. The closer I get to you, the worse it gets. Because of you, my life has changed. Thank you for the love and joy you have brought me. Thank you so much. Sometimes I get lonely and all I have to do is think of you. You captured something inside of me. You reached inside and touched me eternally. 'I love you' best explains how I feel for you...but all I have now are memories, memories that are so worn out for I think about them too much…
Often I asked myself how I could unravel my latest mistake, the mistake of losing you, not taking you back after you said no to my proposal. Life's an hour glass, and I can't find the rewind button, I can't change the outcome of what has already happened. All I can do is hold my head in my hands and just breathe. I tried to move on, but God, it's so beautiful when you smile, I just want to hold you, but I can't. I'm too much of a coward, too afraid that you don't love me back, because then, I'd have nothing left to keep me here, no reason to live. At least now, if you don't love me, I've passed into the force with the fact that now you know how I feel. When we meet again, maybe I'll find out if you feel the same way, but for now, I'm satisfied.
There's a light at each end of this tunnel, if I only I could just turn around and come back to you, but that's impossible.
If I get this all down on paper, it's no longer inside of me, threatening the life it belongs to. And I feel like I'm naked in front of the crowd cause these words are my emotions, screaming.
No one can find the rewind button now. Sing it if you understand.
I never stopped loving you, and I never will. Always remember that. I hope you feel the same way about me, but I can't force you to feel things you don't.
This pen can't convey what I'm trying to express. I'm doing the best that I can do, but all that's happening is a big jumble of sentences.
Just know that I love you.
-Wengo
Then, out fell something shiny, something dark orange and small. It had fallen into the grass and as she picked it up, she realized what exactly it was. It was her wedding ring, the ring Wengo had asked her to wear the day he proposed. It was an onyx stone, for Guil was never fond of diamonds.
The tears were flowing and her smile was from ear to ear. She picked up the ring and slipped it on her finger and kissed it to the sky.
I love you, Wengo.
Even on this sad occasion she couldn't help but feel happy. Wengo loved her, and she loved him. Her body was tingling with happiness; words could not express the feeling. She wanted to jump for joy, she wanted to scream with happiness, she wanted to cry, she wanted to do everything.
'Sing it if you understand.'
She sang, she sang for her, she sang for Wengo, she sang for their love. She didn't care about anything else; they were all that mattered right now, at this second. At this second, everything was perfect.
If ever you wondered
If you touched my soul, yes you do
Since I met you I'm not the same
You bring life to everything I do
Just the way you say hello
With one touch I can't let go
Never thought I'd fall in love with you...
Because of you, my life has changed,
Thank you for the love and joy you bring
Because of you, I feel no shame,
I'll tell the world it's because of you
Sometimes I get lonely
And all I got to do is think of you
You captured something inside of me
You make all of my dreams come true
It's not enough that you love me for me
You reached inside and touched me eternally
I love you best explains how I feel for you...
Because of you, my life has changed,
Thank you for the love and joy you bring
Because of you, I feel no shame,
I'll tell the world it's because of you
The magic in your eyes
True love I can't deny
When you hold me I just lose control
I want you to know that I'm never letting go
You mean so much to me I want the world to see,
It's because of you.
It was a song she remembered as a little girl. Her father used to sing it for her mother. Now it was for Wengo; for them.
She felt reborn, reborn into something pure. She was water, clear and white; she was the soaring birds above. She didn't hurt anymore, she just felt happy, serene, and at peace with herself.
She was the sweet dreams that soothed him when he couldn't fall asleep, the field in the middle of the city, rushing by the speed of life. She was the strong resolution when he found no peace…
Wengo, you're the center of my universe.
Author: Sorry but this story needed some fluff...forreal. What's a romance story without some? I like this chapter the best because of all that fluff...im a loser for it. Be honest if you didn't like, i'm sorry if it didn't deliver. But it makes me sad how Wengo's dead...this sucks. Why did i have to kill him off dammit? hits myself with keyboard.
I also realized that my writing style keeps changing...my appologies. Well i just hope your enjoying this more and more, otherwhys i'll be angry with myself. I hope i didn't make Wengo look too cheesy sounding Also, Wengo's letter is kinda artsy, this whole thing is really, because i used the lyrics to songs for it. The songswere Because of You by Kyla, Lovely by Trish, and Breathe (2 AM) by Anna Nalick. Those three songs are really awesome, so if some of those lines sounded really really familiar, its because they were the lyrics of those songs. lol. I hope you enjoyed this fluffchapter...if you didn't like it tell me, i'll do that stuff less in this story.
Also, if you play Lovely by Trish while reading ch. 12, it makes the whole thing feel alot different.