Marie's note: Hey! I wrote this chappie! Credit goes to Rochelle for inspiration, but I actually wrote it! Thank you very much, Rochelle, my muse, for posting this for me!

"Okay, so what am I supposed to do again, Bingaling?" Spam was practically dying from all the walking they did…all the way down to the road from Dodo's house. Yeesh!

Bingaling sighed. "You're to look after Dodo, you hear me? You're to accompany Dodo to the village of Debris and keep your eye on him."

"So, I'm supposed to go to Debris and leave Dodo here?"

"NO! You and Dodo go to Debris. Meet me at the Inn of the Stampeding Elephant."

Spam sorted through this for a second then said, "Right. So go to Debris without Dodo and be sure to stay away from the Inn of the Stampeding Elephant."

"Argh! NO! Both of you go to Debris…"

"Both of us go to Debris…"

Bingaling continued. "And meet me at the Inn of the Stampeding Elephant, not to be confused with the Prancing Pony."

"Meet you at the Inn of the Prancing Pony."

Bingaling was nearly at the point of strangling the little bobbit when Dodo said, "Spam, just follow me, okay?"

Spam smiled brightly, "Oh, okay, Mr. Dodo!"

The two set out for Debris. They passed through beautiful country and farmland, all the with a lovely soundtrack playing in the background. Soon, while passing through a cornfield, they chanced upon a very unfortunate pile of obviously placed thorny sticks. I suppose they weren't that obviously placed though, since both Dodo and Spam tripped over them.

Apparently, they weren't the only ones since also upon the ground in the pile were Sad Scotchbuck and Mitten Look, both with bundles in their hands.

"Dodo!" exclaimed Mitten. "Look, Sad, it's Dodo Flaggins!"

The foursome picked their poked and punctured bodies out of the pile of sticks.

"Hello, Dodo!" said Sad, brushing off his coat and pulling out large and obnoxious thorns.

Suddenly they heard a high, squeaky and non-threatening voice yelling, "Come back here, you young hooligans!"

Spam at this point in time finally notices their bundles. "You've been stealing from Farmer Caterpillar's crop haven't you?"

Dodo looked curiously at the shiny food they were carrying and said, "Um…those look plastic."

"Mitten, where did you get that fruit?" asked Sad, intrigued, also looking at the somewhat fake looking apples.

"Well, I went into their cellar since I figured I might find some ale there and I found this nice little box labeled 'table settings'."

They all continued to look at him, wondering how this explained the wax fruit.

"Oh, and so I looked inside and found this food. It looked really good so I took it."

They sat there for a second, still staring at him wondering how such a large head could contain so few brain cells, until they heard more shouting and decided that the scythe that had appeared above the tops of the crops was probably a sign that they should start running.

Of course, they didn't expect that cliff to be there, although you'd think that the big billboard saying 'Drop Off Ahead' would be something of a clue, but you never know…

After falling down the rather rocky and painful precipice and landing in an extremely uncomfortable, not to mention dirty and embarrassing pile, the foursome picked themselves up…again…

"This is what you get for trusting a Brandybuck and a Took."

"Who's a Brandybuck and a Took?" asked Sad.

"No, you moron, he said 'must trust sandy, muck, and tooth,'" said Mitten, looking at all of them as if they were completely dense.

Dodo, ignoring the fact that the rest of his friends were complete idiots, said, "This is what you get for trusting a Scotchbuck and a Look."

"Scotch? Where? Does it come in pints?" Mitten looked around excitedly.

"Hey, are those…?" Spam pointed to a pile underneath a tree.

"Anchovies!" Mitten offered this comment, much to the annoyance of his counter part, Sad.

"No, your other favorite pizza topping!"

Mitten thought about this for a moment then asked, "Pineapple?"

"Mushrooms!"

"Hey, I love mushrooms! They're really good on pizza!"

Three of the bobbits rushed over to the pile of mushrooms, leaving Dodo to stare down the road with a concerned look on his face.

Suddenly Dodo realized that he had a concerned look on his face for a reason. "Get off the road!"

After hiding themselves in a conveniently hollowed out hiding place off the side of the road, a terrible and fearsome creature came prancing, er, stalking up the road.

The hideous beast was covered in a Barbie sheet, its revolting facial features covered up by a bright purple book cover. The faint aroma of a bed of spring flowers floated to the bobbit's nostrils.

Dodo suddenly felt this urge to put the mood ring on, but was stopped by Spam.

Sad quickly tossed their bag labeled 'Spare contacts' off into the woods, causing the creature to turn and ride after it.

The four bobbits raced off in the opposite direction not so sneakily.

"What was that?" asked Sad when they stopped to rest.

"Why did you throw Mr. Dodo's bag of spare contacts away? I think that was rather important," whispered Spam. He knew that this could turn ugly.

"I must get to the village of Debris." Dodo suddenly realized what Spam had said and screamed, "Wait, that was my bag? I thought that was Spam's bag of taters! I need those! If I don't have them my eyes could lose their shockingly glaring blueness and…wait, not that I wear any contacts or anything…"

Once again, an awkward silence ensues.

Finally Sad said, "Right." He thought for a moment about how to escape the strange sweet smelling creatures. Suddenly he had an epiphany. "Good Golly Trolley! Follow me!"

The bobbits ran frantically toward the trolley, thinking they were being followed. coughcoughparanoidcoughcough

They jumped onto the trolley, gasping breathlessly.

"How far to the nearest stop?" panted Dodo.

"Flavored Water Bridge, 200 miles," replied Sad sadly.

"Well, this should take a while," replied Mitten.

Marie's post note: Heyy! Well I hope you liked it! Please review! We're very lonely over here! Mitten is Pippin in case you didn't catch that. I figured you would, but just verifying.

Rochelle's note: THX Marie for thinking up all of this! For all ur peeps info Sad is the opposite of Merry. Merryhappy, sad opposite of happy! Get it? Got it. Good. Luv ya all!