A/N: This annoying little drabble was running around my head. Most annoyingly, it decided to write itself while I was trying to finish up a chapter for Progeny. Damn ideas.
Disclaimer: Still Angel, season 5. This one has fewer spoilers than the last one. Basically set shortly before Harm's Way.
XXX
The Secretary
Life totally sucks. And not in that, ha ha it's funny because I'm a vampire way either. It used to be good. I was a princess in high school (Cordy was always the queen). I had it all. I had friends, and uh… probably some other stuff too.
Then I find out freako Buffy is even more freakish and wants us to fight a giant snake who wants to eat us, which, y'know, is fine by me. Being made into vamp chow wasn't part of the deal. At first I thought it was great. Fat free diet, eternal good looks, super strength. Only it's not good. What's the point of being beautiful forever if you can't lie in the beach, or fix your hair in a mirror?
My Blondie-bear betrayed me for Buffy or Droodzilla or someone, so I go to Cordy. Cordy, I think. She'll be there for me. After all, she's my best friend. Ha! Best friend. I go to her, I try to learn how to be good, and what's the thanks I get? I get sent in to a vampire den to betray them from the inside. I was ready for guarding the car! And worse, she stopped being my friend just because I couldn't fight my nature one time. One time! And I totally wouldn't have let them kill her.
Then life, or is it unlife? Note to self; find out. Anyways, so life gets a little better. I get a job as a typewriter in a law firm, Wolfram & Hart. It's not a great job, but it's pretty good. It's a steady income and they're understanding about the whole vampire thing. My life had been going good. I'd even been considering turning this cute guy who worked as a clerk. After all, I hadn't had a proper boyfriend since my Blondie-bear.
Then Angel had to go and ruin my life. At first I was worried when I was picked out of the whole office, then I was happy. I'd gotten a promotion to personal secretary of the CEO. Which turned out to be Angel. Wolfram & Hart promised me that he wouldn't kill me.
Then the problems started. First the cute clerk stopped chatting with me. Then, when Angel began his no tolerance policy everyone stopped chatting with me. Angel would get cranky and kill someone, or fire someone, or yell at someone and they all blamed Harmony. I could tell from the way they stared at me.
And even though every one of me friends stopped talking to me and everyone started hating me, I still did my job. Pretty damn well, too. I stopped valuable clients from leaving more than once, and I explained to them about Angel's cranky moods and made sure Angel always knew when his appointments were and where he was supposed to be.
Did that help me? Oh no, Angel could never say thank you. Angel doesn't say that. He doesn't say please, or Hi, Harmony, how are you either. It wasn't enough that he ruined my life over and over again. He had to be angry at me and yell all the time and push me until I just wanted to scream or cry or kill something or kill myself.
"Harmony!" he bellowed, the same as he always did when it was time for his morning blood.
Handing him his perfectly heated mug, I gave a large, artificial smile.
"Hi, Bossy."
XXX
A/N: I'm not sure if that came out as intended. It's late, et cetera, et cetera. REVIEW. If you want to see anybody in particular, let me know.