Yay! My exams are finally over, and I'm happy to say that I made them. I still have to study kanji this summer though. But the point is I don't have any school until the end of August, and lot of time to write fanfic and read for that matter.

It has been some time since I updated one new thing is that I've decided to write the characters thoughts in cursive in this fashion: "But just a kiss might be alright?"

Thanks to everybody who has taken the trouble to review.

"What it is this place, why are we here?" She demanded to know.

"I want to know what you meant earlier."

"What do you mean?"

"I want to know what you meant when you called me a liar and said that I despise you."

Inner Struggles

He hadn't really meant anything suspicious by taking her here, it was just that he wanted to make sure that this stayed private. When Cagalli's had launched those accusations against him he had gone cold inside. What did she really think about him? What kind of jerk did she think he was?

"Eh?" Cagalli was startled, was that the reason he had taken her to this place? Feeling a little hesitant she continued, "Well don't you?"

"Don't avoid the subject, I want to know where the hell you got that idea from."

"But yesterday well I… you know. And I'm engaged so. And then you said those things."

She didn't make much sense. But he stiffened when he heard the last thing she said. Oh, how he wished that he could take back those words. He didn't understand what she meant about yesterday but it was true she was engaged and that he didn't like it. But the reason for that was obviously that he loved her. Was it possible that she thought that he despised her for being engaged? But that was ridiculous, of course he despised that wingless canary posing as a human being who she was engaged to but the sweet, cute Cagalli, who could despise her? Anyway it wasn't something that she had had any say in, it was Cagalli's father who had set up the arrangement and as much as he respected Uzumi-Sama he had to question his judgment on this matter.

"I said I was sorry before, I shouldn't have said those things. I really, really didn't mean them. I don't exactly understand what you mean, but if you think that I despise you for being engaged you're wrong. Of course I don't despise you, how can you think that?" Athrun said and in his mind he thought, "It's just that I really, really hate your current fiancée. I love you."

Cagalli felt somewhat relieved but still not fully convinced, and what if he saw her as just a friend? Somehow that would hurt almost as much she thought.

"But I'm still engaged and still, yesterday I, you know I was a bit drunk."

A bit drunk? That was an understatement if he ever heard one. "Have you heard of l-o-a-d-e-d" he wanted to ask but of course thought better of it. But still he started to get an idea what she was bothered about: It was yesterday after all, she had kissed himSometimes he wondered how her mind worked she always seemed to take all responsibility herself, maybe she should blame someone else for a change. Athrun felt guilty about what happened yesterday and it hadn't crossed his mind that she might too.

"Don't feel bad about what happened it is just as much my responsibility even more so… But the truth is I felt really happy."

"Eh, but…" Cagalli was surprised.

"Do you really think I would put up with having to be around Yuna for six months if I despised you? Cagalli, it's quite the opposite."

"Ehhh?" Cagalli was even more surprised, and confused. Her heart started beating faster and she could feel each heartbeat pumping. What was he saying? She didn't dare to jump into conclusions, she just waited for him to continue.

Why was this so hard to say it? This was an opportunity to tell her. It was true he still wasn't sure about her feelings she had said that she liked him but to what extent? But he couldn't wait any longer, if his feelings were rejected he honestly didn't know what to do, but anything would be better that to live in this limbo state. His heart was beating fast and he sweated an unusual amount. He swallowed.

"Cagalli, I love you. That's why."

Cagalli was chocked again, first her mind went all blank then all the emotions came flowing like a tidal wave. All the stress that had been piling was released and she started crying, really crying her heart out.

"Cagalli, what's wrong?" This wasn't exactly the reaction he was hoping for, he felt his spirit sink.

"Nothing's wrong, I don't know why I'm crying." She said and laughed a little between the sobs." I love you too Athrun."

It took a moment but when he realized what she just had said Athrun hugged Cagalli hard, he really didn't want her to cry. "Don't cry, don't cry." He tried to comfort her, but inside he really felt like he was walking on clouds. It was very hard to look concerned and not to grin. So until he could fix his expression he hugged her which wasn't an unpleasant way to hide.

After a little while it seemed that she had calmed down a little and the crying had stopped so he released his grip around her and held her shoulders, her eyes were a little red and she was snuffling. They looked at each other and laughed, "I think there is some tissues in the glove compartment" He reached over for it and pulled out a packet opened it and handed one to Cagalli.

"Here."

"Thanks."

"You're welcome."

He smiled lovingly as he watched her pad her eyes and then blow her nose.

"I think I need another one."

"As many as you like." Still gently watching her and smiling.

Cagalli looked up as she just had blown her nose the second time, "What are you looking at? What's so funny?"

"Nothing… I was just thinking of how incredibly cute you are."

Cagalli's cheeks instantly took a deep red colour. Really not sure how she was supposed to react, "S- stupid what are you saying? Don't go say such embarrassing thing suddenly."

"But it's true."

"I'm red eyed and blowing my nose, how can that be cute?"

"Cagalli is always pretty. No matter what."

"Idiot." she said but a shy smile contradicted it. "…Anyway what is this place, I haven't seen it before."

"Ah, it's no place special, I go here sometimes when I want to think. Let's get out of the car, I think I need some fresh air." They got out and started walking towards the opening and you could hear the subtle roar of the sea nearby.

"Hmm, still going off brooding alone as much as ever I hear." Cagalli spoke again.

"It couldn't be helped, could it? I wanted to be with you but things came in between."

"Yeah… but I want to help you, I want you to speak with me when you're feeling down. Brooding alone usually doesn't solve anything", she laughed a little, "Chances are that it leads to misunderstandings, right?" And that was certainly true, they had both misunderstood each other. And it had hurt the both of them.

"Yeah, you're right."

"I usually I'm not good at brooding, I want to get it out you know. But I've been so insecure about leading Orb and about you and me. It's a totally new situation for me and I guess I haven't been acting like my self because I didn't know how to handle it but… I have decided! From now I will quit brooding."

She looked happy and excited like a little puppy and he couldn't help smiling again, "Ahh, it doesn't suit you." Even if it was a little naïve because problems would always come and especially if you were in the position Cagalli was in. But if she could confide in him when troubles came it would make him happy because he wanted Cagalli to trust him fully.

They had reached the shore it was a cliff and below the waves were beating against it. A gentle breeze played with their hair and their faces bathed in orange light from the sun that was setting. It was almost like a cheap painting.

"It is a nice place." Cagalli said.

"Yeah, it's calming don't you think?" He paused as though he was thinking of something, then put his arms around her waist and pulled her closer, "I don't think I can resist doing this." He said and bent down and kissed her lightly on the lips.

Cagalli's looked confused and her cheeks turned red. "W- what are you doing? What if someone sees us?" she tried to hide her embarrassment with harsh words. That was just like Cagalli, unbearably cute and it only triggered him to continue.

"I don't really care if someone sees us. Just let them." he chuckled at her indignation and kissed her again but this time it was deeper and his tongue found its way into her mouth.

She tried to push him away, he tightened the grip around her and broke the kiss and whispered in her ear, "Cagalli, don't push me away." With that she stopped resisting, she felt that it would hurt him if she did and she didn't want to hurt him anymore than she had.

xX xX x

"So, Seiran I guess that concludes this, is everything fine on your part? I hope that princess of yours won't cause any trouble. That would be a problem…"

"H- hahaha," Yuna laughed nervously and dried the sweat off his forehead with white lace napkin. "Of course not, I have Cagalli right were I want her. As the daughter of Uzumi-sama she has the people's trust plus she is a "war hero", and I think it would be foolish not to use that."

"Well you know your country best so I guess I will have to take your word for it. Just don't screw this up." With that owner of the voice, a man in his 50ties wearing a dark business suit rose to his feet.

"We're counting on you Seiran."

"Leave it to me." Yuna also got up from his chair, they shook hands and the guest with his entourage took their leave.

Yuna on the other hand walked straight to his father's office.

"Father, I have finished the negotiations."

"Excellent, if we play this right it wont be long until we have taken control of this country. What about Cagalli-Sama, is everything under control?" Unato asked.

"Leave it to me father, Cagalli is still a child and she is so insecure so isn't difficult to get her to do what I want. The problem is her friends, especially that blue-haired bodyguard of hers.

One thing's for certain that is not his real name, who in the world would be called "Alex Dino", it's so obviously fake. I'm going to find out their real identities, I'm certain that it will prove to be valuable."

xX xX x

"So, what do you want to do now?"

"Hmm, I think I want to go home. For one thing I'm starving."

"Alright let's go home." He took her hand and they started walking back to the car. Holding hands like a real couple, was it the first time? It was a warm feeling of intimacy but at the same time a somewhat awkward. Their eyes didn't meet because Cagalli stared steadily at the ground before them and Athrun looked at the surroundings. They had just made out and now they were going home. To Athrun it definitely wasn't enough to just kiss but at the same time he was afraid to rush things with Cagalli. On the other hand he had waited six months already and he wasn't sure how much longer he could persevere.

To Cagalli this was a new situation, she had never kissed like that that before (in a sober state) and she felt that something strange was hanging in the air, so they kissed now what? She didn't know what Athrun felt about it but normally you would do more than that if you are …a couple… it was embarrassing just to think about it. They had only just confessed their feelings to each other but she wasn't sure she was ready to take it to the next level because everything had happened so fast.

Later that evening, they had had dinner just the two of them. It had been an exhausting day in many ways, Athrun saw that Cagalli was tired.

"You look tired maybe you should get to bed?"

"Mm, I'm tired but I don't want the day to end just yet. I don't get a day off so often."

Athrun hesitated a second but asked, "So what do you want do?" He knew what he wanted to do but he didn't know if he dared to make that move. He looked at Cagalli and she seemed totally unaware of his inner struggles. She looked so innocent when she was thinking of an answer to his question while fingering with her hair, ah cute! His eyes wandered a bit and stopped at her chest. She really had surprisingly big… stop, stop! "What are you thinking? If you're planning to keep your hands off her you had better stop doing that! You're playing with fire here. Maybe I should just go to bed and maybe take a shower to, eh, release some pressure… but I don't want to disappoint Cagalli. It's true that she doesn't get much free time. But just a kiss might be alright? He shook his head, that wouldn't do. "If I kiss her now I don't know if I can stop myself." He decided it was better not to look at Cagalli for a while and engrossed himself with playing with the coffee spoon.

Cagalli was thinking, did she imagine things or did Athrun seem a little tense? She remembered the kiss they shared by the sea and she felt she must be blushing. She looked quickly at Athrun but he seemed deeply fascinated by the coffee spoon so he wouldn't notice which was a good thing, probably. But things had been a little strained ever since the (you know) she wondered what he was thinking about. He didn't seem embarrassed like she was, damn it why was he always so hard figure out?

"Maybe we could take a walk?" Cagalli finally proposed.

Athrun turned his eyes at Cagalli again looking a little confused, "Eh? Um, yeah, that sounds good."

When they were in the hallway Cagalli suddenly said, "Can we go to my room before we go out? I want to change clothes."

"Eh? I'll wait here." "I wonder if it really is a good idea for me to follow her to her room?"

"Come on, it won't take long!" She took Athrun's hand and started walking towards her destination. Athrun made a deep sigh and led her lead him, he just had to wait outside then there wouldn't be a problem, he swallowed hard. However it seemed that that Cagalli had other plans, she dragged him into the room. "Shouldn't I wait outside?"

"What are you talking about, sit down and wait for me."

Athrun's mind: Cagalli + room + bed equals XXX. For Cagalli didn't seem to be a problem to bring him in here, normally her innocent unawareness was a cute side of her but sometimes it could be troubling. Granted she didn't change clothes in front of him, but in a little room that was part of Cagalli's private rooms. But still in his current condition did she know what she was doing to him? Without doubt, no.

""Sit down" She said. Alright." He sighed once again and sat down on the couch. To keep himself busy he looked around the room; bed, table, bed, closed door to room where Cagalli is changing clothes, bed, she's probably half-naked now, bed. "Argh, this is driving me crazy! Stop it, stop it."

"What is taking her?" Athrun was getting impatient, he wanted out of there. In reality not little more than a minute had passed and just then Cagalli opened the door which flung up violently.

"Sorry to keep you waiting. Let's go!" She said smiling with her whole face.

At this moment timed stopped for Athrun, what was he thinking? He didn't want to go for no walk. He had been patient and had waited for six bloody months, no one could blame him for wanting to do this… except Cagalli and maybe Kira and definitely Kisaka if he ever found out. But now it seemed like trivialities and if Cagalli really loved him she would want to do this too. Yuna would definitely not like this, hehehe…

"Athrun?" He had a weird look on his face. "H- hey, what…" She couldn't say anything more because she had Athrun's tongue in her mouth. He had pulled her to him and was steadily leading her towards the bed. She landed on the bed with Athrun over her.

"Eh, Athrun?"

"I've changed my mind, I think I rather stay indoors." He said with a mischievous grin looking down at her.

Her mind was racing, "What do you mean?"

"Come on Cagalli, even you can't be that slow?"

"Eh? That's rude!" But inside she was screaming, "He really means that, doesn't he!"

"Please forgive me Attha-Sama, if you don't understand I guess I'll have to show you." He started to kissing her again first on the mouth but soon he started moving towards the neck, he chewed lightly at her ear.

"…?" "He's playing with me! It's really starting to piss me off."

"What am I doing? Why do I tease her so much? It will ruin everything. I bet she's starting to get angry, this isn't good."

He stopped and looked her in the eyes, "I'm sorry Cagalli."

Cagalli's anger melted away, when Athrun looked at her with those beautiful green eyes like that she couldn't resist. She wasn't sure she was ready for this or if she would ever be but she didn't want to hurt him and she was sure he would feel rejected if she said no now. But still it was extremely embarrassing.

"…Alright."

"What did she just say?"

"Cagalli?"

"I said "Alright" don't make me say it again!" "Because it's embarrassing."

This time he smiled a genuinely happy smile, "Thank you."

"Don't thank me!"

"…Sorry."

"!"

Not wanting to make her angry again he kissed her gently on the lips without saying anything. Though soon the craving for more returned and the kiss became more intense. He slowly started to take of Cagalli's shirt, she froze for a moment but relaxed again and helped him by holding up her arms. He stopped and looked at her, different from that day on the uninhabited island she was wearing a bra. He wanted to touch but he wasn't sure if it was allowed, Cagalli might get angry. But still, but still he was ready to take that risk and he started to unhook her bra…

xX xX x

"Ahhh, if this is a dream please don't wake me up." He looked to his side and there was Cagalli breathing heavy with sleep looking totally peaceful. They had fallen asleep afterwards and when he had woke up again it was already dawn. It had been a little clumsy and awkward and more embarrassing than he had imagined but at the same time it had felt better than he ever had fantasized. Though he could tell that it had been painful for Cagalli even if she had done her best to pretend that it was nothing, he felt a tinge of guilt because it was he who had caused that pain.

It wasn't a dream, Cagalli was laying there beside him and as if to confirm that she really was there he reached out his arm and stroke her hair gently. Suddenly she stirred and groaned a little, "Athrun?"

"Yes?"

She opened her eyes and looked at him smiling, "You're here."

"Yes I'm here." He said smiling back at her. "And if I don't get back to my room soon, there will be trouble" Not that he would care, but it would mean trouble for Cagalli and that he did care about.

"Are you really OK? I mean it hurt didn't it?"

"Mm, it hurt but… but it didn't only hurt… I'm glad we did it." She felt a little awkward and hid her face in her pillow.

"Cagalli…" He said somewhat surprised but above all happy. Looking at her current behaviour made him smile a little teasingly. "Cagalli, you're too cute. If you're doing that I'm not going to be able to keep my hands away."

"Eh, Athrun, what are you doing?"

…

It is hard not making it too fluffy if you know what I mean.

I hope I didn't write anything too explicit, I think it is harmless but everybody might not agree though I hope they do (because I don't want to get into trouble). I actually would have taken it further but you know, rules.

Assignment for next chapter: Writing it without using the word "really", hmm it will be difficult. I'm not sure I will be able to do it.