Disclaimer: I do not own Saiyuki.

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We were in the jeep I knew I had a sad face on, but wouldn't you be sad after being raped? Gojyo looked at my and poked me in the head, "Hey monkey, what's wrong with you?"

I gave the kappa a small smile, "Nothing, just a little tired."

"Oh, well don't stay out late like last night." The kappa looked at the passing scenery; luckily he did because I started to get teary eyed.

I wiped my eyes and looked at the rearview mirror to see Sanzo looking right at me through it. I looked away immediately being ashamed to what happened, I felt as If it was my fault. Maybe If I fought back it wouldn't have happened! Maybe if I didn't talk to that guy it wouldn't have happened! Maybe If I didn't leave the hotel room to eat it wouldn't have happened! I slammed my fist against my thigh, Gojyo looks over at me confused, "You ok monkey?"

I nodded I didn't want to look at anyone, the kappa puts his arm around my shoulder and pulls me in, "You sure? I mean your not complaining about being hungry. And you just hit yourself? What's up monkey?"

I pushed the kappa away, its nothing..."

The kappa was going to say something but Hakkai slammed the brakes interrupting the kappa.

"We have company guys." Hakkai sighed and we all got out of the Jeep.

I called out my Nyoi-bo and off we went and fought the huge pack of youkai. I saw a youkai charge after me he looked like the guy who raped me. I screamed and down I went being punched in the face. Gojyo ran to me after slicing the youkai up, he sad me up and looked at me worried.

"What the hell was that Goku?" Sanzo had his arms crossed and wanted an answer for my actions.

"What do you mean?" I rubbed my cheek looking at the ground.

The monk grabbed by the hair and brought me to my feet, "Why did you scream and why did you get hit?"

I didn't look at him, I looked at his Sutra and sighed, "I don't know..."

"Goku...are you sure everything is alright?" Hakkai had a concerned tone in his voice.

I nodded, but the monk hit me in the head anyway, "You're not ok stupid monkey!"

"Leave me...alone..."I stared at the ground.

The friendly youkai walked up to me and put a hand on my shoulder, "Goku..."

"For crying out loud! What the hell is wrong stupid?" The monk was impatient.

"Hey ease up Sanzo." Gojyo got up and walked over to me.

"Don't tell me what to do kappa!" The monk was furious; he walked over to me pushes the two away and lifted my head up so I would have to make eye contact.

"Answer me monkey, what the hell is wrong with you?" His eyes showed concern, was he worried that was acting strange?

"Its nothing..." I tried to look away.

"Don't you look away! Come on Goku tell me what's wrong, you've been strange since last night." His voice and words made me break down.

I suddenly started to cry without notice, the three looked at me worried. Sanzo backed away a little as Hakkai put a hand on my shoulder, "Goku...did something happen last night?"

I nodded my head wiping the tears and taking deep breaths. The green-eyed youkai frowns, "What happened?"

Sanzo shook his head, "Tch, probably lost a meat bun that's all."

Gojyo looked at Sanzo as If his was angry with him, I think the kappa knew it wasn't something that stupid. But yet again food is something I get upset about but Sanzo was being a jerk.

I clenched my fist, "It wasn't that..."

"Then what was it? You lost the money for your food and never got food?" The monk smirks, he was being a total ass I couldn't believe I loved him.

I shook my head, "It wasn't that...either..." I sniffed and wiped my eyes again.

"Then what was so bad that is making you cry like a baby?" The monk looked angry he doesn't care much for crybabies.

Cry like a baby made me snap, "I'm not a baby! Wouldn't you cry too If you were raped last night by a man!"

Everyone froze, Hakkai removed his hand from my shoulder he was shocked with the other two. I looked at Sanzo he was shaking his head, "Why did you let yourself get raped Goku?"

"Why! I couldn't fight him! He was huge!" I was yelling now.

"Huge where Goku? In his pants?" You would think Gojyo would say something like that but it was the monk. The kappa and youkai were still shocked.

"No! He was bigger and stronger than me! What am I suppose to do?" I looked at Gojyo he was pale, why is he pale I thought.

"You're supposed to be strong stupid! Why didn't you fight back?" The monk was yelling too.

"How could I fight back when he tied me up!" I looked at Sanzo then back at the kappa who turned around.

"Oh so it was bondage? Did you enjoy that?" The monk was about the break to screaming at me.

"I hated every minute ass-wipe!" I looked at the monk the lines between his eyes were deep.

"Did you at least taste him? And did he taste good?" The monk was breaking me down with these comments.

I was screaming now, "Yes he said suck him!" But I didn't! And he called me a little bitch!"

"Now I know it all! He was right you little bitch!" The monk's angered expression disappeared he looked upset.

I didn't care he did it he called me a little bitch! All hell would have broke loose, but it didn't because Gojyo was on his knees throwing up. Hakkai ran over to him worried, "Gojyo! Are you alight."

The kappa nods, "Yea sorry...these details were too much."

The kappa walked over to me and put a hand on my shoulder, "Goku, it isn't your fault that you were raped by a perverted freak. I'm sure you tried your best to fight back."

I was amazed the kappa didn't say anything perverted or anything. I nodded and looked at Sanzo. He was looking at the ground, I'd bet he thought he said too much and was ashamed at himself. Good I thought, he made it sound like I enjoyed being raped.

That night Sanzo had his own room, and I shared a room with Gojyo and Hakkai.

"Goku you sure you want us with you? I mean aren't you afraid of men?" The kappa never said a thing mean to me today and it was a nice change.

I shook my head, "I can trust you guys, and anyway I might have a nightmare and I need someone to be here with me."

Hakkai nods and smiles, "We're glad you can trust us, but what about Sanzo? Aren't you going to fix things?"

I shrugged, "I'll try tomorrow...but right now I'm tired."

ojyo laid down, "Well goodnight Goku...Hakkai."

"You too Gojyo, and Goku if you need anything just wake us up." Hakkai laid down and I laid in between them.

I fell asleep quickly, not knowing If I would dream of last night.

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Darth Rhi