AN: Alright thanks for all the reviews. Once again I'm sorry I couldn't answer them all last time, I was swamped with homework and other fun stuff.
First off I'm just gonna say what did you expect when I even named the chapter How Boring. This one's better I promise.
xx-Tsumi-Chan-xx I'm glad you liked the chapter.
Jubei Himura it was short for my liking as well. I swear the rest of the chapters will be longer though not by much. This isn't the sort of fic where I can spout off ten pages at least not yet.
Vermillion Wolf well I did warn you that it would boring. Hopefully this chapter makes up for it.
Harukakanata, hurrahhurrah, moonlightpath I'm glad you liked it.
Ravenchild89 glad you like the idea. I hope it lives up to your expectations.
starry096 yes yes the elusive bio has been filled in. Check back once in a while you never know what I'll come with for it (have you seen Scenes from a Chinese Restaurant yet?). Oh and I'm glad you liked the chapter as well.
krn-kimbap well that is certainly a very cute and enthusiastic review. I'm glad you liked this story so much (I checked out yours but I haven't had a chance to finish it yet). As far Tsunade's concerned you ain't seen nothing yet! There will be no green spandex in this story (at least not at the end). Ino and Anko are very similar I chose to exploit that so I'm glad you liked it. I'm glad you liked the most recent chapter as well.
Aligrl first off let me say that I love your name (Ali) and secondly thanks for the review and I'm glad you like it so far (or at least find it interesting). Alright now let's talk; I both agree and disagree with you so let me explain my reasoning. I agree that Hinata likes Naruto because he gives her confidence, but the way I see it Hinata has taken that and formed a crush out of it. I think her crush is more idolization then a serious crush and that if she really thought about it she and Naruto would probably never amount to more than friends (just my interpretation). Also my view is that lack of self confidence stems from having fears. In Hinata's case it is her fear of letting people down and not living up to the expectations placed on her. I believe if she stopped worrying about what others expected of her and concentrated on what she wants she would gain that confidence and stop being so shy. Please don't think I'm saying anything against you (I've dealt with some people who are offended easily so I'm being cautious here) I really appreciate such well thought out reviews I'm just trying to justify it relation to this fic. Sorry this is such a long response but I hope it helps you understand where I'm coming from here.
Lizzeny thank you very much I'm glad you like how the story is written.
Possible Pairings: I've gotten a lot of requests for both Neji/TenTen and Ino/Shikamaru. The first one I'll almost definitely use the second one is a possibility. Kiba/Hinata and Lee/Sakura are also possible. And I've decided Kakashi will be paired with Genma; I've already written several scenes that include this last one so don't ask me to change it.
Impossible Pairings: I'm just gonna go ahead and say that I will not use Sakura/Sasuke or Naruto/Hinata in this fic. I'm not a big fan of either of them in general and they just really won't work with what I have planned.
Just keep in mind that I am aiming to make this a humor fic which means pairings will mainly be used in humorous ways. Don't expect anything too deep here, though it will be well thought out (except for a few slight mix ups with ranks and such see my author note at the bottom which could very possibly confuse you even more).
On a slightly related note I'd really like to hear your opinions about this. I've gotten a number of reviews that mention they might stop reading because I'm including a male/male pairing. I have nothing against it personally (actually I'm a bit of a slash fangirl) and I don't have anything against those who don't like it either. My question is this if you don't like slash, why? I'm just curious if it has to with age, religion, or just personal preference. You don't have to respond I'm just curious. (If you don't want to answer in a review feel free to email me separately)
This story is AU (Sasuke's still there) starting after about chapter 177 of the manga that means there will be spoilers if you haven't gotten that far. Information about the past five years will be told throughout the story.
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.
B regular stuff
B internal thoughts and such.
Picture Day
Where the hell is he? Inner Sakura raged while Sakura fought not to voice her counterpart's anger. Although judging by the looks Naruto and Sasuke had just given her she must have failed that particular pursuit. Oh well, she thought turning her back to them and watching the river under their bridge.
Team 7 had grown up nicely. Sakura had kept her hair short and it was particularly messy on that particular day (she had been out a bit too late the night before). She was also quite tall only two inches shorter than Naruto, who just happened to still be an inch shorter than Sasuke, who was an inch taller than Kakashi. Her eyes were green as ever and complemented nicely by the small pink diamond situated on her still overly large forehead. She still dressed like she did when she was fifteen, her red shirt and skirt with black shorts.
Naruto and Sasuke hadn't changed much either. Naruto was still loud, hyper, and…bright. He had grown quite a bit as well. He was now five foot eleven and nicely toned. Sasuke was still quiet, brooding, and…dark. He was six foot tall and pale as hell but just as toned as Naruto. If either of them ever got in their minds to clean up once in a while after a mission they'd look awesome, Inner Sakura thought as Sakura snuck a peak at her teammates. Not that she actually cared; she had given up on Sasuke years ago. Right… Inner Sakura never did believe her.
To be perfectly honest she hadn't seen either of the boys in almost six months. She had declined ANBU duty, but work at the hospital kept her going constantly and when she did get a day or two off she went on missions as one of the few medics to be placed with other Jounin teams. Naruto and Sasuke didn't see much of each other either. They weren't on the same ANBU team so missions done together were rare. On days when they were both in town and not training with either Jiraiya or Kakashi they would spar with each other… of course that hadn't happened in almost seven months. Naruto would speak with Lee and the others that had joined ANBU but other than that he normally didn't see any of the other Rookies in more than passing; Sasuke was even more of a recluse than he was.
Other than their dismal social lives Team 7 had done quite well for themselves. Sasuke and Naruto had become Chuunin six months after the disastrous first exam; Sakura had followed six months later. They remained Chuunin for only a year each before becoming Jounin much to the surprise of the village and the pleasure of their senseis. Naruto and Sasuke had joined ANBU almost immediately and she had begun working at the hospital.
She was currently considering taking on a Genin team like Tsunade had suggested, but she wasn't quite sure she wanted to just yet.
From the looks of it Sasuke (who had become an ANBU captain within a year of joining) would become head of the ANBU department within a year or two.
Naruto (who had become a captain within two years) was currently being pestered to retire and take a team. Tsunade had told him that the sooner he settled down and showed that he wasn't just in it for the excitement and challenge he just might become Hokage – Naruto had flipped her off before sticking out his tongue and walking out of the room (Jiraiya had laughed for days). Personally Sakura believed Tsunade just wanted to retire.
"That inconsiderate bastard!" someone shouted behind her causing Sakura to turn around and blink in surprise at Naruto. He usually didn't show off his growing vocabulary.
A poof above them caused the three Jounin to glance up at they're now grinning sensei. "YOU'RE LATE!" rang through the air with the combined voices not only of Naruto and Sakura but Sasuke as well. Kakashi blinked and then put on a hurt face to crouch on the banister near Sakura. "Now really I haven't seen you all together in almost seven months and this is how you greet me?" he asked pouting. Sakura rolled her eyes before shoving him off the bridge and into the river below (or would have if he hadn't caught himself and landed on the surface). Naruto snickered and walked over next to Sakura to look down at Kakashi; Sasuke joined them a moment later.
"You have better have a damn good excuse, Kakashi-sensei," Sakura growled still looking down at her sensei.
Kakashi nervously scratched the back of his head before jumping off of the river and back onto the banister. After some quick thinking he decided it probably wouldn't be safe to stay there so he jumped over them and landed on the bridge. His three ex-students turned to look at him skeptically. "Well you see Tsunade called a meeting this morning,"
"She finished the meeting with you four hours ago sensei. I met with her ten minutes after you left; we've been waiting for over three hours," Naruto said, causing Sasuke to smirk at his sensei.
"Ahh…" was Kakashi's only response. His students shook their heads and smiled at him.
"Well at least you haven't changed much," Sakura said. Kakashi grinned at her – at least she thought he did.
"Tsunade mentioned she gave you a mission for us," Naruto mentioned curiously.
Kakashi's grin faded and he looked at his students nervously. "You three aren't going to like this," he said. "Well Sakura might but you two won't," he added, pointing to Naruto and Sasuke.
"It better not be another D-class mission," Naruto muttered to himself.
"Another one?" Sasuke questioned his ex-teammate with a smirk.
"Yeah the damn old hag gave me one last week. When I was leaving she shouted that if I had a Genin team I could make them do it for me," Naruto said, glaring at the dark haired boy.
Sakura burst out laughing which made Naruto glare at her and pout at the same time. The combination looked utterly adorable but it wasn't very effective. "She must really be desperate," the pink haired girl managed to choke out while still laughing at her teammate.
"It's not a D-class mission," Kakashi said grinning at Naruto.
The blond breathed a sigh of relief at his sensei's statement. "Thank Kami, that old hag is really starting to have too much fun with this," Naruto stated.
"What does she want us to do?" Sasuke asked.
"Well you see, they have a slight problem in administration," he began while watching them closely. Luckily all three were used to Tsunade's 'problems' and they just grinned and shook their heads.
"As you know your clients pay a great deal for your services. In order to assure them that they are getting their money's worth before the mission is accomplished, Tsunade gives them a file on the shinobi that she/he/they are hiring," Kakashi said drawing blank looks from all three.
"What exactly is the problem?" Sakura asked.
"Well it turns out that these files are a bit outdated and it will take your help to revise them," he added, trying to brace the still confused shinobi in front of him.
"Get to the point sensei," Sasuke said impatiently.
Kakashi chuckled nervously and scratched the back of his head again. "She needs to update your photographs," he said quietly.
"Well that's not a big deal," Naruto said, "We can go take new pictures now."
"It's not quite that easy," Kakashi said sighing.
"How out of date could they be that this assignment is a mission?" Sakura asked interrupting Kakashi.
I hate you Tsunade, Kakashi thought before resigning himself to his fate. "The last time any of you had photos taken for administration was when you became Genin," he said, causing their jaws to drop.
"Are you telling me that my clients are seeing me as a twelve year old before they meet me?" Sakura shouted at him.
"I don't believe it," Sasuke said, looking at his sensei in shock, "How could she let this happen?"
Naruto on the other hand was rolling on the ground laughing. "Oh that's great," he choked out between giggles. "She probably didn't even realize she was supposed to update them or something, our clients probably thought they were hiring the village's geniuses seeing our records with a picture of a twelve year old," he suddenly sat up not realizing that the others were looking at him oddly. "Actually she might have done this on purpose. If the clients who hired us but never met us believed that we were like twelve and Jounin with our records it would have raised Konoha's reputation. Clever old hag," Naruto added grinning.
"Is it possible that Naruto's right?" Sasuke asked incredulously.
"Which part?"
"Either."
"Probably, he's the only one in the village with a brain anything like Tsunade's so he'd be the first to figure out her actions."
"What are you three talking about?" Naruto asked as he finally calmed down and stood up.
"Nothing," they answered simultaneously, causing Naruto to roll his eyes at them.
"So what's the mission then," Naruto asked.
"Ahh… well you see she's decided it would be best to retake team pictures as well for sentimental purposes," he stated.
"Okay, I still don't see how this is turning into a mission," Sasuke asked dubiously.
"We have to go shopping," he said. Sakura's face lit up and Naruto and Sasuke could only look back and forth between their sensei and female teammate in horror.
"Why?" Naruto whined.
"Because Tsunade wants us all to look very good for out clients," Kakashi said in explanation.
"We're shinobi not geisha, why should our clients care what we look like?" Naruto shouted back at him.
If it weren't for Tsunade's threat, Kakashi would have agreed with his former student whole heartedly; not to mention that Naruto was showing more intelligence today then he normally did in a week. "Yes well she also mentioned that our team photo would be placed prominently on her desk so that everyone who went in there would be able to see our best three young shinobi," he said quickly, trying to pacify the youth in front of him.
The compliment worked somewhat, but Naruto and Sasuke still looked miffed about the entire situation. Sakura's smile had grown and was honestly starting to scare him. "We have until Friday to get you three ready for the photos, after that Tsunade will tell us when they'll be taken," he said in explanation.
"Kakashi-sensei," Naruto ventured cautiously, "what exactly do you mean by…
'ready'?"
Kakashi grinned at him and patted the 'boy' on his head. "Tsunade said to do 'whatever you need' and I intend to just that," he said cryptically, causing both boys to back away. Sakura squealed happily and leered slightly at her teammates. Didn't I just say a half hour ago that they would look awesome if they just cleaned up a bit? Sakura thought while Inner Sakura was shouting for joy.
"I'm going to kill that old hag," Naruto whispered, gaining a rigid nod from his black haired teammate.
"If this is another ploy to get you to take her job would you just do it already," he whispered back.
"She stuck us with an insane, multi-minded girl and a gay, tardy sensei," Naruto said, looking at the whispering duo in front of them. "She's not trying to get me to take her job; she's trying to make sure I don't live long enough to do so," he added hoarsely, backing away from Sakura and Kakashi.
All of sudden the two grinned and broke apart to turn on Naruto and Sasuke. Unfortunately for them the two Jounin had decided to preserve their sanity and had taken off.
Uproarious laughter could be heard from the Hokage's office for the rest of the day as Tsunade and Jiraiya watched Naruto and Sasuke try to evade their make-over crazed ex-sensei and teammate.
AN: Oh the joy! That was sooo much fun to write so I hope you all enjoy reading it. We'll see more of Team 7's escapades and check on the other teams for a while so enjoy!
On another note I just read through the past few chapters and realized that some of the info about ranks and placement was a bit confusing (which proves just how worthless last chapter really was).
Jounin-
ANBU: Sasuke (captain), Naruto (captain), Neji, Shikamaru (captain), TenTen, Shino
Sensei: Lee
Other: Sakura (medic
Chuunin –
Chouji, Kiba, Ino
Hinata (academy sensei)
If anyone has any questions feel free to ask. I'm not actually sure if this will help a lot (to be honest all you really need to know is the rank they are at now)