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48
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Ed did not pry into Howard's life further, and he half-regretted telling Kathy one night that week over dinner that Nadia had left him (although, she would have found out sooner or later when she would wonder why they were not being invited to the Brinkleys for dinner anymore).
The filming of his and Howard's movie ended right on Ed's scheduled time. And all the while, feeling happy that it was finally over, he still felt the sadness which usually came with the finishing of a movie; there would be no more days of going into the studio and working with the people he had been working so closely with and had grown to love.
Now Ed found himself one afternoon sitting in the viewing room with the changed Howard who, ever since the day Nadia had walked out on him, had taken on a depressed quality into his life. He was no longer the same, but now affected by the grievance of losing a loved one. It was as though Nadia had not left, but had died instead. The only difference was if she had died, Howard would know perfectly well where she was. But when you disappear from a person's life without death, but still vital, there is no way to know where they are and if you will ever see them again. And that is the worst possible case. Howard had every right to take on a sorrowful demeanor, as he would forever be without closure.
So as Ed glanced over at Howard from his seat in the viewing room, he felt a grievance of his own. Not for Nadia, but for Howard, this broken man to receive not one, but two heartbreaking matters in the same day.
But Howard did not notice Ed observing him, nor was he thinking about his life problems for once. He was too occupied with the viewing of the film he had created and now finished with Ed. After this viewing, if everything was alright and all in proper order, their work on the film would be entirely over and it would be sent away for processing and then releasing on the public level. Howard crossed his fingers, hoping that everything would be fine. They had already been into the editing room with the film perhaps about thirty times already, and he desperately did not want to visit a thirty-first time.
Ed suddenly leaned over to Howard. "Say, I was wondering if... well maybe... well you've had Kathy and I over for dinners so much already and you've never been to my house... and seeing as how you must be very lone-- Umm... I mean, would you like to come to dinner sometime this week? Just name the day and it's yours." Ed looked over at Howard, eagerly awaiting an answer.
Howard nodded slowly to himself, then looked at Ed with despair-filled eyes. "Ed... I know I should have told you this sooner, because I just know this is going to break your heart, but well... I'm only in Hollywood to make this movie. I was going to stay but now with the recent events and uh... well, once everything's all in order I'm heading back to my hometown in Kansas."
Ed looked at Howard, not wanting to comprehend the presented idea even though he did. He began to sniff and felt tears beginning to well up in the corners of his eyes. He was feeling like a fool for crying like a child in front of his idol and the man he respected, but couldn't help it. He was an extremely emotional man and the thought of Howard leaving him now was extraordinary to his mind. He had grown to love the man, just as he had grown to love Bela. And now, like Bela Lugosi, he was losing Howard. Just as Howard had lost Nadia. It seemed to Ed that so much departing in such a small period of time was somehow unlawful.
The beginning tears in his eyes only grew and grew until they began overflowing in the openings of his eyes and then streamed down his cheeks. He sniffed some more, then lifted his hand, trying to dry away the lamentation.
"Aww, Ed. Come here," Howard said, then embraced Ed.
It was the first time, in the short period he had known Howard that they had embraced. And all the years Ed had spent, admiring Howard from his own dwellings and wondering what it would be like to embrace his idol, he had never imagined that it would feel like this. He was not only embracing an idol, he was embracing a friend.