Author's Notes: Well, I guess I've been bullied into it. The first part
of a TWO PART story. Don't worry, They're going to be pretty long parts.
So no complaining about sequels and stuff when this is over. It is done
when I say it is, so shalt it be. Anyways, on with part one.
Will of the Gods
Part One-Will of the Gods
How had it come to this? Why now after she finally knew the truth did her heart have to be ripped from her chest? Why couldn't they be together? In three short days, her happiness had fled her. Disappeared. Faded like waking from a dream.
Inuyasha was gone.
She clasped the finished Shikon no Tama in her hand, looking back on the events which had stolen away the only man she could ever love as tears poured down her face.
* * *
It was a day like any other day. They had been trekking through the mud, dirt and grime for hours, now. Inuyasha was being Inuyasha as usual, grumpy and cynical. Miroku was being a pervert, and Sango was bludgeoning him. Shippou was doing his best to annoy Inuyasha, and Kirara was just being cute.
Kagome looked at the faces of her dearest friends, smiling and laughing along with them.
Yes, the day was ordinary. No demon attacks (yet, for what day would be complete without one?), no pleas for help.
Just...moving.
Kagome sighed, setting her gaze to the unusually bright, cloud-free sky. How long since she'd first traveled through the well, coming to this time? It felt like forever. In reality it'd only been a little over a year. The jewel was complete, in spite of many battles with Naraku, and Inuyasha hadn't asked for it, or tried to steal it yet.
Things were still going as they once did, however.
He fought her mercilessly over going home, and insisted that he come with her to protect the jewel. She was so used to this by now, she'd just roll her eyes and gesture for him to come along, rather than put up a fight as she'd once done.
Things were much more mellow between them now, as if they'd finally accepted the fact that they'd always argue, there would always be a demon to fight, and there would always be a test for Kagome to go home for. Things had relaxed till they were comfortable.
The stress from Kikyou's betrayal was gone, along with the finally resting Miko, who'd disappeared when Naraku had been defeated. Inuyasha had finally accepted the idea that she was DEAD. He had continued living. He was needed on earth.
Miroku and Sango had grown a little closer as well. Miroku still groped her now and again, but Kagome had noticed Sango didn't hit him as hard as she used too. Their arguments were not as heated as before. Now and then, she'd see Miroku treat Sango with a surprising amount of tenderness that he'd rarely displayed before.
Shippou was getting older. He was beginning to notice the differences between boys and girls, and no longer slept with Kagome in her sleeping bag. This made Kagome a bit sad, but she understood.
Things were changing.
She was in second year of High school now, and her family was encouraging her to go off to college in Tokyo. She hadn't said yes, yet, but she hadn't said no either. She especially hadn't told Inuyasha. She kept quiet about her plans from her parents and the eternally disgruntled hanyou. What they didn't know wouldn't hurt them.
Most of all, she was confused.
She was torn between her life at home, and her secret life here. She loved it in this time, but she knew that this wasn't her home. Or at least, not her only home. She sighed again, and it caught Inuyasha's attention.
"What's wrong?" He asked quietly, glancing over at her.
"Betsuni..." She said, stretching and yawning loudly. "I'm just a bit tired, that's all." She shrugged, slapping her cheeks.
"You've been sighing a lot lately."
She blushed, looking away. "I just got a lot on my mind, okay?"
He shrugged. "Whatever." He glanced towards the sky. "It's going to rain soon." He said, sniffing the air. "We should make camp now."
She nodded, setting down her things, then beginning to put up a tent. Inuyasha set about starting a fire, while Miroku and Sango set out to find water to drink. When they were gone, and the fire was lit, Inuyasha spent a good deal of time examining Kagome from beside it.
Things between them seemed so relaxed now. As if it had become natural to live amongst mortals. Or at least, natural to live near her. He examined her profile, trying to determine what between them had changed so much. She had always seemed at ease with his presence, whereas he took awhile before he had learned to trust her. That trust wavered often, especially early on. It was worst when Kouga came around, or whenever she insisted on going home.
She, on the other hand, seemed only to doubt him when Kikyou came around.
A deep sigh escaped him.
Kagome looked over at him, a gentle smile spreading across her lips. "Who's sighing, now?"
He blushed, looking away. "Ch', I was just thinking."
"About what?" She asked, leaning back and looking up at the rapidly darkening sky. The storm would have crept up on them, had it not been for Inuyasha's impeccable sense of smell.
He looked at her in surprise. She wanted to know what he was thinking? "About..." He stopped. Why did she care, all of a sudden? "Stuff..."
She arched an eyebrow. "Stuff?" She moved over, sitting beside him. "What kinda stuff?"
"Like you care." He grumbled. Glaring into the fire.
She frowned. "I DO care, Inuyasha." She said quietly. "You're my friend."
He looked away. Friends? How long had it been since that had been decided? It was starting to feel different than friendship. He looked at her, a fond smile playing over his lips. "Things were never easy for us, huh..." He shook his head. "I even had trouble trusting you."
"You had your reasons." She smiled. "You were betrayed a lot..."
"You don't doubt me anymore, do you?" He returned his gaze to the fire, staring into it, contently. "Now that Kikyou's gone..."
She arched an eyebrow. "Dummy..." She laughed softly. "You've always been my friend. I never doubted you. How could I?"
"I know you doubted I cared for you."
She flushed darkly, looking away. His statement rang true to her ears. There had been a period of time. Rather than comment, she just shrugged. "Inuyasha, I don't doubt you. I know you're the one person I can count on to always protect me. You're the one thing that is constant, no matter which time I am in, you've always been there..."
He looked towards her, seeing a distant sadness in her eyes. Gently, he turned her face to look at her and examined her whole face closely.
She blushed under his scrutiny, seeing an unfathomable emotion in his beautiful golden eyes. She loved those eyes. She would miss them terribly if she went to college. All she could do, was enjoy the brief time she had left with them.
Inuyasha leaned towards her slowly, gently caressing her cheek, his eyes searching her soul. "Kagome...I..."
She closed her eyes, turning her face up towards him. Please, just one. Just this once, let me imagine we can be more than just friends. Make me forget that I have a life apart from you.
They were a hair's breath away from their first kiss when they heard a twig snap. The pair jerked apart just in time. Miroku and Sango came out, Shippou in tow.
"We...found water?"
The pairs stared at each other, and Miroku noticed a new tension between the hanyou and Kagome. "Did you two...do anything while we were gone?"
Inuyasha flushed, picking up a rock and throwing it. It hit the bozu's head with a loud thunk, and he collapsed on the ground.
Kagome stared into the fire, her eyes saddening yet again. "I'm going to bed..." She said quietly.
"You haven't eaten yet..." Inuyasha objected softly.
She sighed. "I'm not hungry." She went into the tent, just as the rain began to patter down. It fit her suddenly bad mood. WHY?! Why whenever they start to get close, someone has to interrupt?! It had been so close to coming true! Her only wish...
Sango came in a short time later, followed by the others. Inuyasha was the last in. When he entered, everyone else was asleep, except Kagome, who appeared to be lost in thought.
"Kagome?" He asked quietly. He felt a little guilty about his instant panic reaction when Miroku and Sango arrived. He saw her look up at him, a melancholy expression on her face, her eyes twinged with an indescribable sadness.
He sat down beside her, pulling her into a gentle embrace. "I'm sorry." He whispered.
She sighed, pulling back. "It's okay, Inuyasha." She wasn't sure what he was sorry for, but it didn't matter. She felt his hand against her cheek and looked up at him. Before one coherent thought could race through her speeding brain, his lips were against hers. Her heart skipped several beats, then, it began beating again, twice as fast. She put her hands on his shoulders, giving herself to him. Her heart, soul, everything she was. Silently, she prayed it would never end.
Unfortunately, all things must end. Inuyasha pulled back slowly, his eyes opening. He saw tears on her face, and misinterpreted them completely. Oh, god...I upset her. I made her cry. Oh, god...He jumped to his feet. "Oh, god, Kagome, I'm so sorry!" He whispered, then ran from the tent.
Kagome felt her joy vanish in an instant as Inuyasha apologized, and ran from her. She looked around, suddenly lost. Then, she reached up, brushing her once happy tears away. She still loved him. The feelings had never gone away. She had just suppressed them till now.
A sigh escaped her. She'd have to clear this up tomorrow. Right now, she was so exhausted, she just had to sleep...
So she lay down and did just that.
* * *
Inuyasha sat in the forest, tearing up pieces of grass. That had been SO stupid of him! What on EARTH had he been THINKING?! Now he'd made her cry, and she'd hate him FOREVER!
"I'm such an idiot..." He whispered.
"Indeed." A quiet voice responded.
He jerked his head upwards, shocked to see a boy with brown hair and green eyes. The age difference between them looked next to nothing. "Go away. Leave me alone."
"Sorry, kid, that's not part of my job description." It said, sitting down next to him. "The names Earth. Water and Air are kinda annoyed with you right now. Fire's laughing his ass off. That girl is a trip." He shook his head, grinning. "Quite a dramatic encounter you had today. 'What on EARTH was I THINKING? Now she's crying and she's going to hate me FOREVER!'"
Inuyasha back-pedaled, staring at the...THING in damn near sheer terror. "How do you know what I thought?!"
"Because I'm a GOD, DUH!" He rolled his eyes. "Really, Inuyasha, for someone with your powers, you sure are a few crayons short of a box." He sat down. "But at least your stupidity gave me an opportunity to tell you of your new situation."
"What new situation?!" Inuyasha snarled. "You leave me and Kagome alone!"
"I would, but we need your power." He pointed at Inuyasha. "You're the son of a great demon, but not the inheriting son. People in your position don't get to run rampant forever, ya know. We've been trying to wait for you to reach you peak, but time is running short. We need you now, for a war in heaven. We're short one. Lightening."
The dog demon scoffed. "Gimme a break. All I want to do is live life in peace with Kagome." He blushed at stating that out loud.
"Sorry, bub, you ain't got a choice." The god frowned. "Look, ya got three days. Use them how you want. But at midnight on the third day, we're gonna take you. Kicking and screaming if we gotta. I'd be easier if you just came quietly."
Inuyasha shook his head. "No! Please, don't do this to me!"
The god started fading out of sight. "Take my advice, Inuyasha. Say your goodbyes, this is a burden you might get released from, but if you are, you're the first who has. You're going to be a god." Then, he vanished in a shower of green sparkles.
Inuyasha collapsed. "I don't want this!" He cried in anger. "I'd help you if you didn't force me into this!" He slammed his fist into the ground, tears threatening. He was a demon, he couldn't cry. He had to calm down, get a grip...
He didn't want to loose her.
A tear finally fell, splashing onto his hand. He gave up, giving into his tears, thanking the rain for hiding them from the world.
* * *
"Why didn't you tell the poor guy that it's only temporary?"
"Look, Water, if I'd told him, he wouldn't try to clear up all his loose ends before joining us. He needs to be free of guilt, free of pain, free of sadness. If he isn't he's just another pawn. Not a god." Earth sighed, looking down at him. "When he gets here. It'll give him hope."
"Crack-head." Fire muttered, glaring over at Earth. "But it does make sense."
Air shook his head. "I feel worse for the girl than I do that mutt..." He murmured.
Earth sighed, looking down at the sleeping girl. "Sou desu ne..."
* * *
Day One...
Inuyasha approached the camp, feeling oddly alone. He saw that everyone was up, and packing and his eyes saddened a bit as they fell upon Kagome's lithe figure. There was a sudden ache in his heart, and he looked at the ground as he walked up.
"So, the invisible demon returns." Miroku joked, dodging a half-hearted punch. That was when he knew something was wrong with the half-demon. Inuyasha never missed when he intended to hit someone.
Kagome looked up, smiling brightly at him. "Welcome back, Inuyasha."
He moved his hand in something that might have been a wave, moving on to pick up Kagome's novelty oversized backpack. He looked so sad, that Kagome almost cried for him.
Kagome walked towards him, putting her hand on his arm and giving it an encouraging squeeze. "Inuyasha?" She asked softly, seeing an unusual amount of grief on her friends face. He looked so lonely! Gently, she brushed the hair from his face as Miroku ushered Sango and Shippou away from the camp.
"I..." He lifted his eyes to hers. "I'm sorry about...I never should have-"
She shook her head fiercely. "Don't you dare apologize about that, you big dummy."
He looked at her, confused. "B-but I made you cry..."
Kagome smiled tenderly. "Inuyasha, you dork." She whispered, resting her head against his chest, gently stroking his shoulder. "I wasn't upset with you. I was happy." She slipped her arms around him, glancing up at his face. "It was the happiest moment of my life..."
He stared down into her deep blue eyes, his heart pounding in his chest. "I don't want to ever see you cry again." He said, his eyes narrow. "But...I know that I'll make you cry again, someday."
She cocked her head, confused. Finally, she gave up trying to understand. "Inuyasha, what do you want to do today?"
He looked at her. "Something I've never done..." He said, his eyes suddenly shining. "I want to...live life..." He smiled. "Can we?" He asked, jumping up, pulling her up with him. "Can we just...be free for today?"
Her eyes lit up and she nodded. "What have you never done..." She asked quietly.
He looked at the ground. "I've never...run wild...for no reason at all. I've never forgiven someone before...I've never...told my friends how I really feel..."
"Let's take them one day at a time." She said, smiling brilliantly.
He looked at her in shock. Silently, he counted out on his fingers. Three things. Three days.
His eyes moved towards Kagome and he nodded. "Let's do it." He whispered.
Her eyes shone and she smiled.
* * *
They returned to Kaede's village briefly, then Inuyasha and Kagome disappeared for a while.
Inuyasha stood under Goshinboku, waiting for her to return to him. He stared up at the ancient tree, his heart aching. It was where the ties between two people had broken, then, between two strangers were formed. Perhaps that was why he and Kagome were the only one's who could travel through the well. They'd always be able to reach each other...just maybe...somehow...
"Inuyasha?"
Hurriedly, he wiped the tears from his eyes, turning towards her with a smile. "Kagome..." He knelt, offering to let her climb up onto his back, his heart pounding. When she climbed up onto his back, her arms winding around his neck, it stood still.
He straightened and took off at a dead sprint. For no reason at all. It felt good.
Kagome rested her ear against his back, listening to the sound of his heart beating. It was an oddly comforting sound. She closed her eyes, smiling happily. It felt to be so close to him. It had been so long since she'd been able to be with only him, and now, here they were, together. She looked at his face, then smiled. "I missed this, Inuyasha..." She whispered to him, as she felt the wind brushing her cheeks gently.
He glanced back at her, his lips turning up in a sad smile. "Me too..." He whispered, his breathing suddenly labored due to his rapidly tightening chest. He pulled her around in front of him, turning and landing on his back, looking up into her eyes. "Kagome..." He whispered, cupping her face.
She blushed, staring down at him, uncertain all of a sudden. "I-Inuyasha?" She asked, resting her hand against his cheek. "What's wrong?"
He smiled brilliantly up at her, pulling her down to him, embracing him tightly. "Kagome, thank you." He whispered, fighting tears. "You've done so much for me..."
She thought that her face couldn't get any more red, then she felt his lips tenderly feathering against her face. "I-Inuyasha..." She murmured. "Wh- why?" She felt them brush constantly against her lips, eyes, cheeks, and forehead, her heart pounding in her chest. She lifted her face, looking down at him. "You've changed." She whispered. "You've changed so much since I first met you..." She cupped his face. "You have every one worried right now. You're so withdrawn from everyone. You're hiding yourself from me especially..."
He gently rolled her under him, looking down into her beautiful blue eyes. "Kagome, don't ask questions yet. I'll explain everything soon, okay? I promise. I'll tell everyone everything very soon..."
She nodded, her eyes sad.
He smiled at her, then gently kissed her lips. "Arigatou..."
* * *
Day Two...
Inuyasha left early that morning, running towards his destination. Today would be mostly without Kagome. He hated being without her, but he needed to do this alone...
He stopped in front of the great manor, and looked up at it, moderately frightened. He walked in quietly, and called out to the person he had come to see.
"Sesshoumaru!"
The demon appeared as if from nowhere. "What are you doing here? You know you're not allowed here..." His claws cracked ominously.
"I have not come to fight, Onii-sama..." He said quietly. He lowered his head, his hands fisting in annoyance. He heard Sesshoumaru relax audibly. He knew it had been ages since he had called his older brother such a name.
"Why are you here, Inuyasha?" Sesshoumaru asked quietly, his eyes calming. The words 'onii-sama'...how long had it been since his brother had called him that? It must have been over a hundred years.
"I've come to say good-bye..." He looked up at his brother, his eyes miserable. "A god came to me, two days ago, and said that at midnight tomorrow night, I...will vanish..."
Sesshoumaru lowered his head. "Sou desu ka?" He asked quietly. "So they have finally sought you out." A tired sigh escaped him. "What are you doing with your last days on earth?"
"Living..." Inuyasha looked at his brother, completely serious. "I've never really lived before, and so I'm doing things I've never done..."
"Are you going to mate the human?"
Inuyasha flushed. "She's not ready for that..." He muttered. "I'm just going to tell her my feelings..."
Sesshoumaru sighed. "Indeed. One thing I want to say, little brother. I...I will watch over them."
The younger demon fell to his knees. "Arigatou...Onii-sama..."
Sesshoumaru put his hand on Inuyasha's head, gently petting his head. "Otoutou-chan..." He whispered. "You are still my brother, remember? I will take care of them, as if they were family as well..."
"Thank you..."
* * *
"KOUGA!"
Deep growls filled the cave. "Inu-kuro, what are you doing here?!?!" The wolf-demon walked out, looking furiously angry with Inuyasha.
"Look, Kouga, I didn't come here to fight." Inuyasha growled quietly. "I find it distasteful enough that I'm here as it is."
"Where's my woman!?" Kouga growled.
"Kagome is in Kaede's village." He said evenly, his voice suddenly smoothing, calming. He looked at the wolf-demon seriously. "I've come here...to..." He swallowed his pride and spat the words out. "Ask you for a favor..."
Kouga laughed harshly. "Why should I help you?! Stupid puppy! You're my rival!"
"I WANT YOU TO TAKE CARE OF KAGOME!" Inuyasha yelled. Then, his voice dropped. "Because soon, I wont be able to take care of her myself..."
"Are you going to die, puppy?!" Kouga laughed. "This is excellent news."
"I'm not going to die...I think. I'm going to war..." Inuyasha looked at the ground. "I don't care if you hate me. I just want...I just want Kagome to live to grow old. I want her to be happy. Do you understand that?!" He looked furiously at Kouga. "As of midnight tomorrow, I'll be gone from the planet. I wont EXIST here anymore."
Kouga was silenced. "Why are you asking me to?"
"Because...you're the only one I know will make sure Kagome is okay..."
The wolf-demon walked towards Inuyasha, offering his clawed hand. "I promise..." He said quietly.
Inuyasha shook it, his head lowered. He didn't want to see that wimpy wolf to see the tears in his eyes.
Without another word, the dog demon left. It was getting late.
* * *
Inuyasha knelt in front of the shrine, his eyes solemn and sad. "Kikyou...I'm sorry." He whispered. He lit some incense, and prayed silently to the gods for her to be at peace, finally.
When he was done, he sat cross-legged, to talk. "I love you. Part of me always will." He touched the cold stone. Cold, as her lips had been. "But you have to share me now, you know? Because someone else is asking for my love, too. I have to let you go, Kikyou. My heart was healed because of her. She takes care of it, and protects it. She cares about it's happiness." He kissed his fingers and gently trailed them down the cold marble.
"I forgive you for what you've done to me, and to her. Please, may your spirit protect her from wherever it is. Goodbye, Kikyou..." He stood silently, walking down the many stairs, leading away from the shrine.
* * *
Kagome watched as the sun dipped below the horizon, her worry clutching her chest as it had since early that morning. When she saw the pale sillouete walking towards the hut, her heart lodged into her throat. She darted through the cover over the door and ran towards it. "Inuyasha!!" She cried, stopping just in front of him. "Where have you been?! We've been worried sick!"
He looked at her, and his lips turned up into a gentle smile. "Were you really worried?" He asked, his hand gently cupping her face. He searched her face and saw her eyes were really red, and there were tracks from tears on her face.
His heart throbbed.
"Of course I was worried you jerk!" She cried, hitting him lightly. "You disappeared this morning! You left off on your own! I thought-I..." She blushed. "I thought you were going to take me with you..."
He tilted her face up, smiling. "Kagome, what can I do...to make up for making you cry again?" He whispered, his thumb gently caressing her lips.
She blushed, looking down. "Anything?" She asked.
"Anything."
At his confirmation, she wrapped her arms around his chest, pressing her face against his shoulder. "Just hold me."
"Such a simple request." He whispered, wrapping his arms around her slender form.
"But it's all I want." She felt tears begin to fall down her face again, but remained silent. "I want to be like this with you forever..."
Inuyasha tightened his grip on her, burying his face into her hair, the tears he'd been fighting for so long finally sliding down his face.
Neither knew the other was crying. They made no sound, crying silent tears.
* * *
Day Three...
Inuyasha woke up, and immediately set about his plans for that day. It was going to be a day for Kagome. But this morning, he had a few other things to do.
He sat out by the fire as Kaede-babaa cooked breakfast for the others. He pulled out a piece of paper and began to write a long letter to the others in their band.
He heard the others beginning to stir as the scents from Kaede's cauldron lulled them from their deep sleep. Silently, he folded the paper, slipping it into Kagome's 'math book'.
* * *
"Inuyasha, where are we going?" Kagome asked, as he led her out in the hot midday sun, her silent companion, seeming reserved, and very sad. He had her worried. "Is something wrong, Inuyasha?"
He glanced towards her, giving her a gentle smile. "You ask a lot of questions." He teased.
She flushed. "Well...I'm worried about you...These past three days you haven't been your normal self...usually you tease me and insult me a little bit...and you haven't hit Shippou since we returned. And...Inuyasha, it's not just me, everyone's noticed."
He sighed. "Kagome, what is the one thing you've never done?" He asked quietly.
She flushed darkly. "I've never..." She hid her face. "Laid in your arms..." She tried to hide the color rising to her cheeks, and saw sweet, gentle eyes looking at her.
He smiled tenderly. "Kagome, you'll get the answers to your questions soon, but I can't tell you yet. You'll understand soon. I'll explain soon." He caressed her face, kissing her lips gently. "Today is for you, just you. I don't want you to ever forget how much you mean to me. So anything you want I'll do it."
She tilted her head to the side, her worry growing. What was wrong with her Inuya-
When his lips sealed over hers again, she forgot what she was thinking.
* * *
Inuyasha lay against the ground, staring up at the stars, Kagome beside him, her warm body warming his. He glanced towards her, his eyes saddening. The third day was almost over, too. Soon he'd never see the smiling face before him ever again.
Kagome played with the jewel, then took it off, looking up at him, her eyes shining at him. "I want you to have this..." She said quietly. "You can have your wish now..." She didn't want to see him as a full demon, but he'd wanted it for so long.
He stared at the jewel with a certain longing. He could wish to be beside her forever, but would the gods give him that much happiness? They seemed content to take him away from her as it was. Could he take another heartbreak like the one he'd received only three days ago? "No, Kagome." He said quietly, firmly.
She frowned. "Inuyasha?"
He stood, pulling her to her feet then he closed her hands around he jewel. "I wish...I wish I could make this easier for you...for both of us...but I can't." He put his arms around her. "I'm going to disappear soon, Kagome." He said sadly. "I only have a few moments left."
She pulled back enough to stare up at him. "What are you talking about?" She asked, fear grasping her chest.
He lifted his hand to cup her face, unable to express the grief he was feeling in words. Never to see this face again? It didn't seem fair he couldn't hold her anymore. He leaned forward, kissing her very gently on her lips. He could feel her shaking and genuinely regretted the pain he would bring her. He broke the kiss and continued to hold her.
He was fading away as she watched. A tear wound down her face. "Inuyasha...don't leave me." She begged softly. "I don't want to be alone."
A sad smile turned up his lips. "Kagome, don't ever forget my promise, our bond. I will always protect you, even when you've forgotten me. And I'll never forget you."
She could see through him now. "Don't go, please! Please!"
He stepped back from her, his eyes sad, yet he was smiling tenderly at her. "I love you, Kagome." With those words, he disappeared in an explosion of iridescent sparkles.
Kagome fell to her knees, a keening wail escaping her. Grief unlike any other tore at her chest, and ripped free in a resounding cry.
"INUYASHA!"
* * *
End Part One
* * *
Author's Notes: Well, there ya go. I made a few distinct changes because I lost the original copy of the plan. The original was going to be eight chapters long, but I didn't have enough stuff to put into the chapters to make em long enough. So, you'll have to deal with just two parts. Anyways, hope you liked the first installment of 'Will of the Gods'. ~DemonLovin~
DemonSaya
Will of the Gods
Part One-Will of the Gods
How had it come to this? Why now after she finally knew the truth did her heart have to be ripped from her chest? Why couldn't they be together? In three short days, her happiness had fled her. Disappeared. Faded like waking from a dream.
Inuyasha was gone.
She clasped the finished Shikon no Tama in her hand, looking back on the events which had stolen away the only man she could ever love as tears poured down her face.
* * *
It was a day like any other day. They had been trekking through the mud, dirt and grime for hours, now. Inuyasha was being Inuyasha as usual, grumpy and cynical. Miroku was being a pervert, and Sango was bludgeoning him. Shippou was doing his best to annoy Inuyasha, and Kirara was just being cute.
Kagome looked at the faces of her dearest friends, smiling and laughing along with them.
Yes, the day was ordinary. No demon attacks (yet, for what day would be complete without one?), no pleas for help.
Just...moving.
Kagome sighed, setting her gaze to the unusually bright, cloud-free sky. How long since she'd first traveled through the well, coming to this time? It felt like forever. In reality it'd only been a little over a year. The jewel was complete, in spite of many battles with Naraku, and Inuyasha hadn't asked for it, or tried to steal it yet.
Things were still going as they once did, however.
He fought her mercilessly over going home, and insisted that he come with her to protect the jewel. She was so used to this by now, she'd just roll her eyes and gesture for him to come along, rather than put up a fight as she'd once done.
Things were much more mellow between them now, as if they'd finally accepted the fact that they'd always argue, there would always be a demon to fight, and there would always be a test for Kagome to go home for. Things had relaxed till they were comfortable.
The stress from Kikyou's betrayal was gone, along with the finally resting Miko, who'd disappeared when Naraku had been defeated. Inuyasha had finally accepted the idea that she was DEAD. He had continued living. He was needed on earth.
Miroku and Sango had grown a little closer as well. Miroku still groped her now and again, but Kagome had noticed Sango didn't hit him as hard as she used too. Their arguments were not as heated as before. Now and then, she'd see Miroku treat Sango with a surprising amount of tenderness that he'd rarely displayed before.
Shippou was getting older. He was beginning to notice the differences between boys and girls, and no longer slept with Kagome in her sleeping bag. This made Kagome a bit sad, but she understood.
Things were changing.
She was in second year of High school now, and her family was encouraging her to go off to college in Tokyo. She hadn't said yes, yet, but she hadn't said no either. She especially hadn't told Inuyasha. She kept quiet about her plans from her parents and the eternally disgruntled hanyou. What they didn't know wouldn't hurt them.
Most of all, she was confused.
She was torn between her life at home, and her secret life here. She loved it in this time, but she knew that this wasn't her home. Or at least, not her only home. She sighed again, and it caught Inuyasha's attention.
"What's wrong?" He asked quietly, glancing over at her.
"Betsuni..." She said, stretching and yawning loudly. "I'm just a bit tired, that's all." She shrugged, slapping her cheeks.
"You've been sighing a lot lately."
She blushed, looking away. "I just got a lot on my mind, okay?"
He shrugged. "Whatever." He glanced towards the sky. "It's going to rain soon." He said, sniffing the air. "We should make camp now."
She nodded, setting down her things, then beginning to put up a tent. Inuyasha set about starting a fire, while Miroku and Sango set out to find water to drink. When they were gone, and the fire was lit, Inuyasha spent a good deal of time examining Kagome from beside it.
Things between them seemed so relaxed now. As if it had become natural to live amongst mortals. Or at least, natural to live near her. He examined her profile, trying to determine what between them had changed so much. She had always seemed at ease with his presence, whereas he took awhile before he had learned to trust her. That trust wavered often, especially early on. It was worst when Kouga came around, or whenever she insisted on going home.
She, on the other hand, seemed only to doubt him when Kikyou came around.
A deep sigh escaped him.
Kagome looked over at him, a gentle smile spreading across her lips. "Who's sighing, now?"
He blushed, looking away. "Ch', I was just thinking."
"About what?" She asked, leaning back and looking up at the rapidly darkening sky. The storm would have crept up on them, had it not been for Inuyasha's impeccable sense of smell.
He looked at her in surprise. She wanted to know what he was thinking? "About..." He stopped. Why did she care, all of a sudden? "Stuff..."
She arched an eyebrow. "Stuff?" She moved over, sitting beside him. "What kinda stuff?"
"Like you care." He grumbled. Glaring into the fire.
She frowned. "I DO care, Inuyasha." She said quietly. "You're my friend."
He looked away. Friends? How long had it been since that had been decided? It was starting to feel different than friendship. He looked at her, a fond smile playing over his lips. "Things were never easy for us, huh..." He shook his head. "I even had trouble trusting you."
"You had your reasons." She smiled. "You were betrayed a lot..."
"You don't doubt me anymore, do you?" He returned his gaze to the fire, staring into it, contently. "Now that Kikyou's gone..."
She arched an eyebrow. "Dummy..." She laughed softly. "You've always been my friend. I never doubted you. How could I?"
"I know you doubted I cared for you."
She flushed darkly, looking away. His statement rang true to her ears. There had been a period of time. Rather than comment, she just shrugged. "Inuyasha, I don't doubt you. I know you're the one person I can count on to always protect me. You're the one thing that is constant, no matter which time I am in, you've always been there..."
He looked towards her, seeing a distant sadness in her eyes. Gently, he turned her face to look at her and examined her whole face closely.
She blushed under his scrutiny, seeing an unfathomable emotion in his beautiful golden eyes. She loved those eyes. She would miss them terribly if she went to college. All she could do, was enjoy the brief time she had left with them.
Inuyasha leaned towards her slowly, gently caressing her cheek, his eyes searching her soul. "Kagome...I..."
She closed her eyes, turning her face up towards him. Please, just one. Just this once, let me imagine we can be more than just friends. Make me forget that I have a life apart from you.
They were a hair's breath away from their first kiss when they heard a twig snap. The pair jerked apart just in time. Miroku and Sango came out, Shippou in tow.
"We...found water?"
The pairs stared at each other, and Miroku noticed a new tension between the hanyou and Kagome. "Did you two...do anything while we were gone?"
Inuyasha flushed, picking up a rock and throwing it. It hit the bozu's head with a loud thunk, and he collapsed on the ground.
Kagome stared into the fire, her eyes saddening yet again. "I'm going to bed..." She said quietly.
"You haven't eaten yet..." Inuyasha objected softly.
She sighed. "I'm not hungry." She went into the tent, just as the rain began to patter down. It fit her suddenly bad mood. WHY?! Why whenever they start to get close, someone has to interrupt?! It had been so close to coming true! Her only wish...
Sango came in a short time later, followed by the others. Inuyasha was the last in. When he entered, everyone else was asleep, except Kagome, who appeared to be lost in thought.
"Kagome?" He asked quietly. He felt a little guilty about his instant panic reaction when Miroku and Sango arrived. He saw her look up at him, a melancholy expression on her face, her eyes twinged with an indescribable sadness.
He sat down beside her, pulling her into a gentle embrace. "I'm sorry." He whispered.
She sighed, pulling back. "It's okay, Inuyasha." She wasn't sure what he was sorry for, but it didn't matter. She felt his hand against her cheek and looked up at him. Before one coherent thought could race through her speeding brain, his lips were against hers. Her heart skipped several beats, then, it began beating again, twice as fast. She put her hands on his shoulders, giving herself to him. Her heart, soul, everything she was. Silently, she prayed it would never end.
Unfortunately, all things must end. Inuyasha pulled back slowly, his eyes opening. He saw tears on her face, and misinterpreted them completely. Oh, god...I upset her. I made her cry. Oh, god...He jumped to his feet. "Oh, god, Kagome, I'm so sorry!" He whispered, then ran from the tent.
Kagome felt her joy vanish in an instant as Inuyasha apologized, and ran from her. She looked around, suddenly lost. Then, she reached up, brushing her once happy tears away. She still loved him. The feelings had never gone away. She had just suppressed them till now.
A sigh escaped her. She'd have to clear this up tomorrow. Right now, she was so exhausted, she just had to sleep...
So she lay down and did just that.
* * *
Inuyasha sat in the forest, tearing up pieces of grass. That had been SO stupid of him! What on EARTH had he been THINKING?! Now he'd made her cry, and she'd hate him FOREVER!
"I'm such an idiot..." He whispered.
"Indeed." A quiet voice responded.
He jerked his head upwards, shocked to see a boy with brown hair and green eyes. The age difference between them looked next to nothing. "Go away. Leave me alone."
"Sorry, kid, that's not part of my job description." It said, sitting down next to him. "The names Earth. Water and Air are kinda annoyed with you right now. Fire's laughing his ass off. That girl is a trip." He shook his head, grinning. "Quite a dramatic encounter you had today. 'What on EARTH was I THINKING? Now she's crying and she's going to hate me FOREVER!'"
Inuyasha back-pedaled, staring at the...THING in damn near sheer terror. "How do you know what I thought?!"
"Because I'm a GOD, DUH!" He rolled his eyes. "Really, Inuyasha, for someone with your powers, you sure are a few crayons short of a box." He sat down. "But at least your stupidity gave me an opportunity to tell you of your new situation."
"What new situation?!" Inuyasha snarled. "You leave me and Kagome alone!"
"I would, but we need your power." He pointed at Inuyasha. "You're the son of a great demon, but not the inheriting son. People in your position don't get to run rampant forever, ya know. We've been trying to wait for you to reach you peak, but time is running short. We need you now, for a war in heaven. We're short one. Lightening."
The dog demon scoffed. "Gimme a break. All I want to do is live life in peace with Kagome." He blushed at stating that out loud.
"Sorry, bub, you ain't got a choice." The god frowned. "Look, ya got three days. Use them how you want. But at midnight on the third day, we're gonna take you. Kicking and screaming if we gotta. I'd be easier if you just came quietly."
Inuyasha shook his head. "No! Please, don't do this to me!"
The god started fading out of sight. "Take my advice, Inuyasha. Say your goodbyes, this is a burden you might get released from, but if you are, you're the first who has. You're going to be a god." Then, he vanished in a shower of green sparkles.
Inuyasha collapsed. "I don't want this!" He cried in anger. "I'd help you if you didn't force me into this!" He slammed his fist into the ground, tears threatening. He was a demon, he couldn't cry. He had to calm down, get a grip...
He didn't want to loose her.
A tear finally fell, splashing onto his hand. He gave up, giving into his tears, thanking the rain for hiding them from the world.
* * *
"Why didn't you tell the poor guy that it's only temporary?"
"Look, Water, if I'd told him, he wouldn't try to clear up all his loose ends before joining us. He needs to be free of guilt, free of pain, free of sadness. If he isn't he's just another pawn. Not a god." Earth sighed, looking down at him. "When he gets here. It'll give him hope."
"Crack-head." Fire muttered, glaring over at Earth. "But it does make sense."
Air shook his head. "I feel worse for the girl than I do that mutt..." He murmured.
Earth sighed, looking down at the sleeping girl. "Sou desu ne..."
* * *
Day One...
Inuyasha approached the camp, feeling oddly alone. He saw that everyone was up, and packing and his eyes saddened a bit as they fell upon Kagome's lithe figure. There was a sudden ache in his heart, and he looked at the ground as he walked up.
"So, the invisible demon returns." Miroku joked, dodging a half-hearted punch. That was when he knew something was wrong with the half-demon. Inuyasha never missed when he intended to hit someone.
Kagome looked up, smiling brightly at him. "Welcome back, Inuyasha."
He moved his hand in something that might have been a wave, moving on to pick up Kagome's novelty oversized backpack. He looked so sad, that Kagome almost cried for him.
Kagome walked towards him, putting her hand on his arm and giving it an encouraging squeeze. "Inuyasha?" She asked softly, seeing an unusual amount of grief on her friends face. He looked so lonely! Gently, she brushed the hair from his face as Miroku ushered Sango and Shippou away from the camp.
"I..." He lifted his eyes to hers. "I'm sorry about...I never should have-"
She shook her head fiercely. "Don't you dare apologize about that, you big dummy."
He looked at her, confused. "B-but I made you cry..."
Kagome smiled tenderly. "Inuyasha, you dork." She whispered, resting her head against his chest, gently stroking his shoulder. "I wasn't upset with you. I was happy." She slipped her arms around him, glancing up at his face. "It was the happiest moment of my life..."
He stared down into her deep blue eyes, his heart pounding in his chest. "I don't want to ever see you cry again." He said, his eyes narrow. "But...I know that I'll make you cry again, someday."
She cocked her head, confused. Finally, she gave up trying to understand. "Inuyasha, what do you want to do today?"
He looked at her. "Something I've never done..." He said, his eyes suddenly shining. "I want to...live life..." He smiled. "Can we?" He asked, jumping up, pulling her up with him. "Can we just...be free for today?"
Her eyes lit up and she nodded. "What have you never done..." She asked quietly.
He looked at the ground. "I've never...run wild...for no reason at all. I've never forgiven someone before...I've never...told my friends how I really feel..."
"Let's take them one day at a time." She said, smiling brilliantly.
He looked at her in shock. Silently, he counted out on his fingers. Three things. Three days.
His eyes moved towards Kagome and he nodded. "Let's do it." He whispered.
Her eyes shone and she smiled.
* * *
They returned to Kaede's village briefly, then Inuyasha and Kagome disappeared for a while.
Inuyasha stood under Goshinboku, waiting for her to return to him. He stared up at the ancient tree, his heart aching. It was where the ties between two people had broken, then, between two strangers were formed. Perhaps that was why he and Kagome were the only one's who could travel through the well. They'd always be able to reach each other...just maybe...somehow...
"Inuyasha?"
Hurriedly, he wiped the tears from his eyes, turning towards her with a smile. "Kagome..." He knelt, offering to let her climb up onto his back, his heart pounding. When she climbed up onto his back, her arms winding around his neck, it stood still.
He straightened and took off at a dead sprint. For no reason at all. It felt good.
Kagome rested her ear against his back, listening to the sound of his heart beating. It was an oddly comforting sound. She closed her eyes, smiling happily. It felt to be so close to him. It had been so long since she'd been able to be with only him, and now, here they were, together. She looked at his face, then smiled. "I missed this, Inuyasha..." She whispered to him, as she felt the wind brushing her cheeks gently.
He glanced back at her, his lips turning up in a sad smile. "Me too..." He whispered, his breathing suddenly labored due to his rapidly tightening chest. He pulled her around in front of him, turning and landing on his back, looking up into her eyes. "Kagome..." He whispered, cupping her face.
She blushed, staring down at him, uncertain all of a sudden. "I-Inuyasha?" She asked, resting her hand against his cheek. "What's wrong?"
He smiled brilliantly up at her, pulling her down to him, embracing him tightly. "Kagome, thank you." He whispered, fighting tears. "You've done so much for me..."
She thought that her face couldn't get any more red, then she felt his lips tenderly feathering against her face. "I-Inuyasha..." She murmured. "Wh- why?" She felt them brush constantly against her lips, eyes, cheeks, and forehead, her heart pounding in her chest. She lifted her face, looking down at him. "You've changed." She whispered. "You've changed so much since I first met you..." She cupped his face. "You have every one worried right now. You're so withdrawn from everyone. You're hiding yourself from me especially..."
He gently rolled her under him, looking down into her beautiful blue eyes. "Kagome, don't ask questions yet. I'll explain everything soon, okay? I promise. I'll tell everyone everything very soon..."
She nodded, her eyes sad.
He smiled at her, then gently kissed her lips. "Arigatou..."
* * *
Day Two...
Inuyasha left early that morning, running towards his destination. Today would be mostly without Kagome. He hated being without her, but he needed to do this alone...
He stopped in front of the great manor, and looked up at it, moderately frightened. He walked in quietly, and called out to the person he had come to see.
"Sesshoumaru!"
The demon appeared as if from nowhere. "What are you doing here? You know you're not allowed here..." His claws cracked ominously.
"I have not come to fight, Onii-sama..." He said quietly. He lowered his head, his hands fisting in annoyance. He heard Sesshoumaru relax audibly. He knew it had been ages since he had called his older brother such a name.
"Why are you here, Inuyasha?" Sesshoumaru asked quietly, his eyes calming. The words 'onii-sama'...how long had it been since his brother had called him that? It must have been over a hundred years.
"I've come to say good-bye..." He looked up at his brother, his eyes miserable. "A god came to me, two days ago, and said that at midnight tomorrow night, I...will vanish..."
Sesshoumaru lowered his head. "Sou desu ka?" He asked quietly. "So they have finally sought you out." A tired sigh escaped him. "What are you doing with your last days on earth?"
"Living..." Inuyasha looked at his brother, completely serious. "I've never really lived before, and so I'm doing things I've never done..."
"Are you going to mate the human?"
Inuyasha flushed. "She's not ready for that..." He muttered. "I'm just going to tell her my feelings..."
Sesshoumaru sighed. "Indeed. One thing I want to say, little brother. I...I will watch over them."
The younger demon fell to his knees. "Arigatou...Onii-sama..."
Sesshoumaru put his hand on Inuyasha's head, gently petting his head. "Otoutou-chan..." He whispered. "You are still my brother, remember? I will take care of them, as if they were family as well..."
"Thank you..."
* * *
"KOUGA!"
Deep growls filled the cave. "Inu-kuro, what are you doing here?!?!" The wolf-demon walked out, looking furiously angry with Inuyasha.
"Look, Kouga, I didn't come here to fight." Inuyasha growled quietly. "I find it distasteful enough that I'm here as it is."
"Where's my woman!?" Kouga growled.
"Kagome is in Kaede's village." He said evenly, his voice suddenly smoothing, calming. He looked at the wolf-demon seriously. "I've come here...to..." He swallowed his pride and spat the words out. "Ask you for a favor..."
Kouga laughed harshly. "Why should I help you?! Stupid puppy! You're my rival!"
"I WANT YOU TO TAKE CARE OF KAGOME!" Inuyasha yelled. Then, his voice dropped. "Because soon, I wont be able to take care of her myself..."
"Are you going to die, puppy?!" Kouga laughed. "This is excellent news."
"I'm not going to die...I think. I'm going to war..." Inuyasha looked at the ground. "I don't care if you hate me. I just want...I just want Kagome to live to grow old. I want her to be happy. Do you understand that?!" He looked furiously at Kouga. "As of midnight tomorrow, I'll be gone from the planet. I wont EXIST here anymore."
Kouga was silenced. "Why are you asking me to?"
"Because...you're the only one I know will make sure Kagome is okay..."
The wolf-demon walked towards Inuyasha, offering his clawed hand. "I promise..." He said quietly.
Inuyasha shook it, his head lowered. He didn't want to see that wimpy wolf to see the tears in his eyes.
Without another word, the dog demon left. It was getting late.
* * *
Inuyasha knelt in front of the shrine, his eyes solemn and sad. "Kikyou...I'm sorry." He whispered. He lit some incense, and prayed silently to the gods for her to be at peace, finally.
When he was done, he sat cross-legged, to talk. "I love you. Part of me always will." He touched the cold stone. Cold, as her lips had been. "But you have to share me now, you know? Because someone else is asking for my love, too. I have to let you go, Kikyou. My heart was healed because of her. She takes care of it, and protects it. She cares about it's happiness." He kissed his fingers and gently trailed them down the cold marble.
"I forgive you for what you've done to me, and to her. Please, may your spirit protect her from wherever it is. Goodbye, Kikyou..." He stood silently, walking down the many stairs, leading away from the shrine.
* * *
Kagome watched as the sun dipped below the horizon, her worry clutching her chest as it had since early that morning. When she saw the pale sillouete walking towards the hut, her heart lodged into her throat. She darted through the cover over the door and ran towards it. "Inuyasha!!" She cried, stopping just in front of him. "Where have you been?! We've been worried sick!"
He looked at her, and his lips turned up into a gentle smile. "Were you really worried?" He asked, his hand gently cupping her face. He searched her face and saw her eyes were really red, and there were tracks from tears on her face.
His heart throbbed.
"Of course I was worried you jerk!" She cried, hitting him lightly. "You disappeared this morning! You left off on your own! I thought-I..." She blushed. "I thought you were going to take me with you..."
He tilted her face up, smiling. "Kagome, what can I do...to make up for making you cry again?" He whispered, his thumb gently caressing her lips.
She blushed, looking down. "Anything?" She asked.
"Anything."
At his confirmation, she wrapped her arms around his chest, pressing her face against his shoulder. "Just hold me."
"Such a simple request." He whispered, wrapping his arms around her slender form.
"But it's all I want." She felt tears begin to fall down her face again, but remained silent. "I want to be like this with you forever..."
Inuyasha tightened his grip on her, burying his face into her hair, the tears he'd been fighting for so long finally sliding down his face.
Neither knew the other was crying. They made no sound, crying silent tears.
* * *
Day Three...
Inuyasha woke up, and immediately set about his plans for that day. It was going to be a day for Kagome. But this morning, he had a few other things to do.
He sat out by the fire as Kaede-babaa cooked breakfast for the others. He pulled out a piece of paper and began to write a long letter to the others in their band.
He heard the others beginning to stir as the scents from Kaede's cauldron lulled them from their deep sleep. Silently, he folded the paper, slipping it into Kagome's 'math book'.
* * *
"Inuyasha, where are we going?" Kagome asked, as he led her out in the hot midday sun, her silent companion, seeming reserved, and very sad. He had her worried. "Is something wrong, Inuyasha?"
He glanced towards her, giving her a gentle smile. "You ask a lot of questions." He teased.
She flushed. "Well...I'm worried about you...These past three days you haven't been your normal self...usually you tease me and insult me a little bit...and you haven't hit Shippou since we returned. And...Inuyasha, it's not just me, everyone's noticed."
He sighed. "Kagome, what is the one thing you've never done?" He asked quietly.
She flushed darkly. "I've never..." She hid her face. "Laid in your arms..." She tried to hide the color rising to her cheeks, and saw sweet, gentle eyes looking at her.
He smiled tenderly. "Kagome, you'll get the answers to your questions soon, but I can't tell you yet. You'll understand soon. I'll explain soon." He caressed her face, kissing her lips gently. "Today is for you, just you. I don't want you to ever forget how much you mean to me. So anything you want I'll do it."
She tilted her head to the side, her worry growing. What was wrong with her Inuya-
When his lips sealed over hers again, she forgot what she was thinking.
* * *
Inuyasha lay against the ground, staring up at the stars, Kagome beside him, her warm body warming his. He glanced towards her, his eyes saddening. The third day was almost over, too. Soon he'd never see the smiling face before him ever again.
Kagome played with the jewel, then took it off, looking up at him, her eyes shining at him. "I want you to have this..." She said quietly. "You can have your wish now..." She didn't want to see him as a full demon, but he'd wanted it for so long.
He stared at the jewel with a certain longing. He could wish to be beside her forever, but would the gods give him that much happiness? They seemed content to take him away from her as it was. Could he take another heartbreak like the one he'd received only three days ago? "No, Kagome." He said quietly, firmly.
She frowned. "Inuyasha?"
He stood, pulling her to her feet then he closed her hands around he jewel. "I wish...I wish I could make this easier for you...for both of us...but I can't." He put his arms around her. "I'm going to disappear soon, Kagome." He said sadly. "I only have a few moments left."
She pulled back enough to stare up at him. "What are you talking about?" She asked, fear grasping her chest.
He lifted his hand to cup her face, unable to express the grief he was feeling in words. Never to see this face again? It didn't seem fair he couldn't hold her anymore. He leaned forward, kissing her very gently on her lips. He could feel her shaking and genuinely regretted the pain he would bring her. He broke the kiss and continued to hold her.
He was fading away as she watched. A tear wound down her face. "Inuyasha...don't leave me." She begged softly. "I don't want to be alone."
A sad smile turned up his lips. "Kagome, don't ever forget my promise, our bond. I will always protect you, even when you've forgotten me. And I'll never forget you."
She could see through him now. "Don't go, please! Please!"
He stepped back from her, his eyes sad, yet he was smiling tenderly at her. "I love you, Kagome." With those words, he disappeared in an explosion of iridescent sparkles.
Kagome fell to her knees, a keening wail escaping her. Grief unlike any other tore at her chest, and ripped free in a resounding cry.
"INUYASHA!"
* * *
End Part One
* * *
Author's Notes: Well, there ya go. I made a few distinct changes because I lost the original copy of the plan. The original was going to be eight chapters long, but I didn't have enough stuff to put into the chapters to make em long enough. So, you'll have to deal with just two parts. Anyways, hope you liked the first installment of 'Will of the Gods'. ~DemonLovin~
DemonSaya