On the Inside
Revan walked swiftly towards the great walkway and entered the area leading to the basket that would allow her access down to the Shadowlands below the tall wronksyr trees that the wookiees lived in.
She did not stop as the Wookiee guard challenged her, merely raising a gloved hand and erasing the memory of her ever being there.
In the refuge of her hood, Revan's face was pale, paler than usual as she started the basket machinery and began the long descent to the forest floor. Revan sat back and closed her eyes; it was going to be a long and tiring evening when she finished what had started because of her.
Carth twisted in his bonds, screaming death threats to the people who had done this to him as he strained to get free. His face was flecked with froth and blood, the eyes bloodshot and bronze, the color of dull flames.
He was no longer Carth Onasi worshipped hero of the Republic; he was no longer the man who had once loved a broken woman.
He was a Sith now, a servant of the dark side, all because of Revan…
Revan opened her eyes at the gentle jar of the basket touching the ground and stood up, her entrance breaking the momentary silence of the jungle before the creatures left her alone.
She had no need of fighting them off with her power through the Force, the pain in her soul enough to warn the animals away from her now as she traveled to Jolee's hut, where she had found Carth hiding in.
Revan paused before the door as she listened to the screams and threats from inside the hut. They were hoarse and low, punctured by the occasional hissing and anger that sounded in the voice.
But that wasn't Carth…
Researcher L'lawa had pushed Carth's Force aura to the max, somehow managing to corrupt his …soul as a Sith spirit would have similar done if it had inhabited Carth's body, slowly corrupting his actual soul in return for her life. She shuddered and entered the suddenly silent room.
"Carth," Revan pulled up a stool and sat down besides the bounded man lying on the bed, "I see that you don't like it here."
"I hate it! When I am free of this place, I am going to feed and kill them all! All of the responsible for this!" Carth snarled as he tried to get free once again, froth bubbling at his mouth.
"Carth… Carth listen to me!" Revan bent besides her husband and grasped his face in gentle hands, "if you want out of here, you must listen to me! Carth suddenly stopped struggling and stared at her, the wild look on his face fading slowly.
"Can you do that for me?" She asked softly, the fear in her eyes and face, calming the raving man down somewhat.
Carth seemed to consider it for a moment before he replied; "Yes… love."
"Good."
Revan knelt closer to him and placed her hands on either side of his face, "I'll help you then Carth, before I leave…"
She closed her eyes and suddenly Carth screamed as he was pulled out of his body and into her mind. She pulled his Force form away from his body, though not killing him.
It was an old technique she had learned from Master Kreia at one point and it had served her well in the past and now.
Carth stopped screaming as the pain subsided, suddenly finding himself in a dark chamber; dropped roughly to the floor. He grunted and stood up, his hand reaching automatically for the blaster that would have been strapped to his side; instead he found a single lightsaber there.
Carth unclipped the Jedi weapon and inspected it curiously; it was a simple crafted style, silver casting and the mark of the Onasi family stencilled into it.
He touched the activation button and a blade of brilliant red flared to life. He turned it off and on again, this time the blade flaring to a brilliant white-blue blade.
"I see you found a path to choose from, no?"
Carth whirled at the voice to find Revan sitting on a stone, watching him with grave intent. He had automatically brought the lightsaber up to slice through the intruder and now the blade shone both red and blue, the white licking the two colors like flames.
"What do you mean, Revan? What path are you talking about?" Carth demanded furiously, the blade pulsing red in time with his anger and frustration.
"Look at the lightsaber you hold in your hand, Carth." Revan motioned to the blade as Carth held it up to look at it. "Every aggressive action, any thoughts of murder or harm to another and when your anger flares it pulses brighter, the blade turning red."
"What does that mean, Revan?" Carth asked looking fearfully at the blade in his hands now; he tried to drop it, but the lightsaber was stuck to his hands. No matter how hard he tried, he could not release it.
"It means you must choose whether you will become a follower of the dark side or the light…" Revan smiled bitterly, "I walked the edge, but you cannot do what I did, you're not strong enough. Not like I was… like I am."
"I can pro…" Carth began but Revan silenced him with a look.
"What?" She asked bitterly, "You can lead armies and fight a war and save the galaxy? You'll go and kill their leader, finding out later that he was your father that you never knew? That after all of this you must sacrifice yourself to betrayal and hate, letting those you thought you could love, and trust destroy you?"
Revan trembled with suppressed anger as she stood glaring at Carth. "No," she said staring at Carth, "I am the reason the dark side was able to take hold of you in the first place. I shouldn't have opened you up to the Force on Rakatan in the first place."
Carth shook his head, "you may have opened me to the Force, but I was the one, whose anger caused me to fall." He reached forward and grabbed Revan's cold hands, falling down to his knees as she cried. "Help me, Revan;" he sobbed pathetically, "please help me…"
Revan knelt down in front of him, "I will repair the damage, Carth and then I will betray you…" She lifted his tearstained face and looked deep into the brown eyes, as she watched the flames in them flare once and wither away in front of her soul.
There was no dark side…
There was no light side…
There was only the Force and herself,
And there was Carth, this time…
There was Revan
…and Christina as well…
No one else was there and nothing else mattered.
It was late at night, when Revan returned to her ship, Carth walking beside her. She shook her head and smiled at her lover sadly.
"You can't come with me, Carth… It's just not safe anymore."
Carth shook his head stubbornly, "the Star Forge wasn't safe… Malak wasn't safe, the banquets weren't safe. Nothing's safe anymore, Revan… I'm going to come with you on this new quest to save our home again."
"I love you too." She said and then Carth dragged her into their room, ignoring the startled look from the guard at the check-in-point who hurried away.
Carth grinned at his wife, "it's only going to get better," he whispered carried her to their bed and pinned her onto it, "trust me."
Revan rolled out of Carth's loose embrace and smiled softly down at her sleeping husband as she looked closely at him.
He showed the few remaining signs of the dark side's toll on his body, paler skin, the sunken eyes, but it wasn't as bad as she had feared when she had pushed him into her mind and out again.
She stood and dressed quickly, tucking the piece of flimsy in Carth's hand before she planted a kiss on his lips softly and left the room. Her hand touched her stomach and Revan closed her eyes as the tears threatened to fall again.
She was betraying him again, taking herself and his daughter away from him.
But he couldn't follow her where she was going and Revan wasn't able to wait until Christina was born.
Abortion was her third option, but that was not an option ever that she could make.
Revan's shoulders shook as she made her way to the Ebon Hawk where Canderous greeted her quietly.
"You said goodbye?" He asked gruffly and Revan nodded, the tears running down her face as the big mandalorian embraced her in a huge hug and led her into the Hawk's interior.
They took off five minutes later, just as Bastila, Jolee, and Juhani arrived at the docks.
"We've got to go to Deralia and pick up this package; you and HK can go and retrieve it for me, please?" Revan asked her friend who nodded to her and went wit the killer droid to retrieve the package.
Revan's face suddenly went cold and hard as she turned on the comlink and activated it on a secret frequency.
"I know you two are out there, and that Trag and Kettrag can hear me perfectly well." Revan said out loud, "I'll be waiting for you."
Canderous re-entered the ship with the package that Revan had requested him and HK to pick up.
"Where to, Revan?" He asked and she looked at him, her mask pulled over her face, the mask she had worn as the Lady Revan and Darth Revan during the Wars.
"Dxun..." She said, "I have need of an army, Canderous and I intend to start one."
They arrived on Dxun two days later, during mid-afternoon, as they trudged through the jungle paths to the seemingly abandoned camp of the Mandalorians.
Revan carried the package she had gotten from Canderous and HK. She wouldn't let Canderous carry it no matter what he tried to say or convince her.
She stood in the center of the camp and raised her voice, her double lightsaber staff blazing to life. "I, the Lady Revan who defeated your leader Mandalore stand before you to pass judgment on the Mandalorians."
Suddenly warriors from everywhere flashed into existence, as they closed their stealth fields down and one warrior stepped out of their large groups.
"And the so called Lady Revan stands before us?" He laughed, "Revan died in the Jedi Civil Wars with the destruction of the Star Forge."
Revan smiled dangerous at the foolish man, "you only wish I had died, dear Uncle…"
He snarled in reply, "aye, after you killed your father I was robbed of my rightful title."
"Jonas, you are stripped of any rank you shall ever have again!" Revan spoke quietly and tossed the package to Canderous who caught it startled, "I hereby name Canderous Ordo, Mandalore of the Mandalorians!"
There was a startled silence and then thunderous cheers applauded Revan's statement as Canderous donned the mandalorian armour. She turned to the new Mandalore and jerked her head to what was just Jonas' office.
Her uncle met them there as HK intercepted him, stopping short when HK threatened him.
"Threatening Statement: Halt jungle meatbag goo! Gleeful statement: One step closer and I will make you dance the meatbag death dance."
A smile tugged at Revan's face as she turned to look at her shocked uncle who was seething and Revan laughed out loud.
"Jungle meatbag goo...?" She gasped as she started to feel the laughter trying to attack her, "that's different than usual, HK…"
HK stood up straighter if at all possible and replied that it was a fitting category to place her uncle in and oh please could he eliminate the annoying jungle meatbag goo?
Revan shook her head as Canderous laughed shortly at the droid's behaviour. "No, I need him alive… for various reasons." She paused and turned to her uncle. "Get out of here and don't come back, or I'll kill you sooner."
Revan sat back in her chair as the flashback ended with a sigh and groan. She had left Canderous on Dxun after a few days when Jonas had left, searching the Sith Tomb near the settlement. It had revealed to her what she had expected and was looking for as well.
She couldn't forget Canderous' hurt face when she had refused his help or anything except for supplies for that matter. He had taken the armour off and spoken to her, face to face as they once had back on Taris in a dingy cantina.
He had even begged her to reconsider at one point, trying everything to convince her not to go, to take help.
Revan had refused sadly and she left heartbroken, leaving behind a man who was suddenly lost to the world.
Canderous stared incredulously at Revan, "you're going to do what!" He shouted and Revan grabbed his arm as she hissed back; "keep your voice down, people are looking!"
Canderous shook off her arm and hauled her into his office, the second one in the main room. "Why are you running away again Revan?" He asked seriously and not calmly either.
Revan shook her hooded and masked head, "I'm not running away, Canderous, I'm going to stop the major forces and then I'm coming back. I need you to train an army, Canderous, an army that will follow me and protect the galaxy when I return before they come."
Canderous hauled off his helm and threw it on the floor, "I don't want this gift then; Revan. You can't expect me to take it, just so you can run."
He took off the rest of the armour, and stood there in his old plain clothes, minus the big rifle that would have being slung at his hip or on his back.
"Yes I can, Canderous." Revan replied and she tilted her head up to look at him. "You have to, if you want Bastila and Char to stay safe, Mission… all the others. I know you play the tough act, but we both know you really care for us all."
Canderous snorted; "don't you start going all mushy on me now, Rev and take off that damn mask and hood!"
Revan raised her hands and removed the mask, but not the hood as she stared at Canderous with an assurance that he would do as she had asked. He may have been named Mandalore, but Revan was still and always would be the true Mandalore in his eyes.
"I leave tomorrow, Canderous." She stood on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek, goodbye, Cousin – I'll be back one day …just wait, for me."
Another flashback ended yet once again for Revan as she jerked awake, jolted by T3 as he jabbered at her insistently. She couldn't exactly make out what he was saying, but she got the gist of it.
"All right, all right... I'll go to bed and let you fly the Hawk."
Revan lay down on her bunk and closed her eyes. She wanted to scream and cry, rage and rant. But it wasn't going to help any and she knew it.
The Ebon Hawk's engines flared and she was gone, just like that into the Unknown Regions.
She also knew what had to be stopped and why she had done all of what she had done in the past.
"It was necessary…" she whispered, "It was necessary to destroy an entire culture and the galaxy to save it. Necessary…"
No one heard her. No one, expect for one person... and that person was dead. Dead to the Force at anyrate.
Okay, I'm very aware that I left the last chapter as a cliff-hanger and it was evil, but here is chapter six - or at least it's the final redraft of it that I'm willing to do. One treat, we are going to meet new and more characters in the next few chapters, so make sure you've read all the chapters for hints or re-read some of them.