A Second Chance
Chapter 28 – The world is stupid.
DISCLAIMER: Buffy the Vampire Slayer belongs to Joss Whedon, and Harry Potter to J.K. Rowling. I don't own anything.
TIMELINE: AU. Set ten years before (Around 1988) "Harry Potter and the Philosopher's stone", during and after Harry Potter book 5, "Order of the Phoenix"(2003). During and after BTVS season 7, "Chosen". Pretend HP book one happened in 1999 during Buffy season three )
SUMMARY: BTVS/HP crossover. After James and Lily reappears, seemingly alive and well, mysterious things start to happen. New allies are made, prophecies revealed...and people keep rising from the dead. What's going on? And what has Voldemort got to do with it? Are the Scoobies and the Potter's second chance at life enough to stop the Dark Lord from spreading darkness across the country? Or is the world in need of more miracles?
PAIRINGS: Too many to count.
Thanks to my beta: Charmed Chick
Sirius was sitting under the stairs at Grimmauld place, waiting silently for Amy to emerge from upstairs. It was two weeks since the 'bloody annoying woman' had showed up, and every morning he'd been waken up by one nasty surprise after the other. This morning, however, he would not. Sirius had been up since four o'clock, and was now waiting for Amy to come down from his room, where she was expecting him to lay, peacefully sleeping, while she threw some garbage on him to wake him up. But not this time. This time, Sirius was prepared. And he was not going to be the victim for that mad woman again. Ever.
Suddenly, there was a scream from upstairs. Sirius eyes widened – were they under an attack? He raced up the stairs and ran into his room, and where met by…a cold shower…of green stinking seaweed.
"Holy...Merlin…Bollocks!" Sirius coughed, and spat, and swore. He opened his eyes, and found Amy standing there, smirking.
"Morning, Sirius!"
Sirius glared, and gave her a cold stare. Amy, however, burst out laughing. She, had, as normal, been sneaking into Sirius room to throw the seaweed on him, but soon she'd noticed the covers were looking a bit faked. Liked they'd been positioned to look like someone was sleeping under them, even though someone didn't. When she'd checked, she'd had her suspiscions confirmed - the bed was empty. She'd frowned a bit at first, disappointed that Sirius had been a step ahead of her this time, but she was not going to give up.
The seaweed was her best idea on a long time, and it was a waste of it if she didn't get to use it. So she had placed herself in the middle of the room, and started screaming. It had not taken longer than five seconds for Sirius to emerge in the door opening, and…now he was standing there, dripping in water, smelly green seaweed, and looking like he was ready to kill.
"Oh, Sirius," Amy said still laughing, "you look really dirty. And you smell."
Sirius gave her another glare.
"Wonder why…" he muttered. "You shouldn't scream like that! I thought we were under an attack!"
Amy just smiled sweetly.
"You should take a shower," she said. "And clean up in here too. See ya!"
She waved, and went out of Sirius now badly smelling room.
"This. Was. The. Last. Straw. This. Means. War…" Sirius muttered through clenched teeth. "No one messes with a marauder. And especially not with me!"
"Alright, is everybody here and accounted for?" Giles asked, as he made a fast check to see who were there and who wasn't. It was time for the second Research and Documenting Skills lesson with the sixth year Gryffindors.
"Great, now, let's move on. During research, you need to know…"
"…See, this is what I don't get," Andrew suddenly interrupted from where he was sitting by the desk. Giled sighed, and did a disapproving clucking sound with his tongue before turning to Andrew.
"Yes, Andrew?"
"Why are there no register in these books? It is so amateurish. I never really understood how you find anything in these books when you don't know what's in them. If Clark Kent was here, he would…"
"Andrew."
"Yes, Giles?"
"Be quiet."
"Yes, Giles."
The class stared at amazement at Andrew. He had not been there for their first lesson, and so they were not used to his…ways.
"As I was going to say, you need to know what you are looking for during research. If you are looking for a demon, it would help if you knew looks, traits, language...anything can be of help. But today we are not researching about demons. Today we are going to look up facts about different dimensions. Andrew, would you like to have the word?"
"Yes!" Andrew lit up, and got up from his chair to stand beside Giles.
"O-okay, different dimensions are really interesting, and I've always wondered if Star Wars were real. It could have happened a very long time ago in a dimension far, far away, and I've always had this theory, that travelling through hyperspace is like moving through dimensions, and when…"
"…On a second thought, why don't you justsit down again," Giles said, sighing, rubbing his eyes tiredly.
The students jaws where hanging open. Most of them, didn't understand a thing of what Andrew was talking about, but those who were muggleborn did, and they looked at him like he was crazy. (Except for Hermione, who looked impatient, and Dawn, who was doing her best not to laugh out loud)
"But I wasn't done yet!" Andrew protested. "I was going to explain to them about the beauty of shape shifting aliens, and how exactly the radioactive bite could turn Peter Parker into Spiderman, and how the Green Goblin was a psycho - "
"…Remind me again why I'm taking this course," Harry whispered to Dawn, who couldn't help it. A giggle escaped her mouth (although it sounded more like a snort as she was trying to hold it back), and half the students turned to look at her instead of Andrew (or Ron, who was lightly snoring from his place.)
"Pure entertainment," Dawn whispered. "And no homework."
Harry nodded in understanding. "Ah, I thought so."
" - so in Star Trek, episode - "
BANG.
Everybody jumped in their seats, and turned to look at where the sound came from.
Ron hastily got up from the floor, slightly dizzy. (Ron had fallen of his chair as he'd been asleep)
"I-I'm alright! I was listening!"
Hermione was banging her head against her table, and Harry was doing his best not to laugh at his friend (who's face was really red, and his neck was practically burning out of embarrassment – and not even to mention his ears.)
"Ehrm. Thank you, Andrew, I think that was enough. You're making the students fall asleep of boredom, so obviously I should take over now."
Andrew crossed his arms over his chest, and stomped back towards the desk, muttering something about "stupid wizards with no sense of true culture".
"I can't believe we have to take fighting skills with the Slytherins of all people!" Harry moaned after the Research and Documenting Skills lesson was finally over.
"Of all the classes, I've looked forwards to that one the most – except DADA of course," Harry said to Dawn.
"I don't think it will be that bad," Dawn said, thinking. "Buffy will make sure they behave." She smirked. "If not, I'm sure Faith can scare them out of their wits by telling them how she went on a killing spree."
Harry laughed.
"I hope Malfoy is taking the class," Ron suddenly said. Harry turned to stare at him.
"Did you hit your head when you fell of your chair?" He asked. "Because I thought we hated Malfoy?"
"Oh, I do," Ron said. "That's why I hope he'll take it. I can just see it in front of me; a repeat of the beautiful scene in Diagon Alley – Buffy throwing the ferret high up in the air…"
His eyes were slowly glassing over.
Hermione sighed.
"And here I thought you were finally putting your grudges aside, and growing up…"
Ron woke up of his trance.
"I am grown up! I'm very mature!"
"Right," Hermione rolled her eyes. "Tell me again when you're actually doing your homework on your own."
When they came into the classroom, it was already full of excited people. The room was split up in two camps, as usual, Slytherins at one side, and Gryffindors at the others – the unwritten rule. And in the middle of it all stood Draco Malfoy, Slytherin king number one.
"Oh, but what do we have here? Potty, Weasel, Granger and the little new mudblood. Another girl in your fanclub. Like the little Weasel wasn't enough."
Ron started to grow red as Malfoy was insulting his sister, and was just about to jump him, when Dawn spoke up.
"At least Harry has a fanclub," Dawn said. "Where are yours, Malfoy? Those big trolls you hang out with?"
Malfoy narrowed his eyes.
"Watch your mouth, mudblood, or you will - "
" - What? Make you pee your pants again? I heard about that. How the almighty bad boy got scared to death. I hope your teddybear at the bottom of your trunk brought comfort. Fifi, wasn't it?" Dawn smiled sweetly. Malfoy didn't no what to say. How the hell did that mudblood find out about that?
"That's not true…" he finally hissed.
"Right, 'cause I'm sure Spike would have a reason to lie," Dawn snorted.
"Spike made Malfoy pee his pants!" Ron asked, almost rolling at the floor with laughter, and so was Harry, and most of the Gryffindors (except Hermione who tried to scowl, but was failing miserably).
Malfoy grew redder and redder.
"Just wait - I'll get you back for that!" He finally hissed, and stalked back to his seat.
"Alright everybody!" A voice suddenly said, and everybody hastily sat down and grew quiet.
A dark haired woman in black leather pants, a blank tank top, and – yes, you guessed it – a black leather jacket stood in front of the desk.
"Well, I'm Faith – your professor, but if you call me that, you won't live to see tomorrow. Faith will do. Yes, Hermione?"
Hermione had already raised her hand high up in the air.
"Pro…Faith. I thought there were going to be two prof...eh...people teaching this class?"
Faith smirked.
"Oh, yes, there are. B is a bit busy for the moment, that's all. She's trying to make a friend slash used-to-be-enemy volunteer to help for this class. They should be here in…five…four…three…two…one…"
"I bloody won't do it!" A voice was suddenly heard from outside the door.
Running feet.
"Oh, please, Spikey…"
Malfoy stiffened in his seat. He knew that voice…
"…Just this once, please…"
"NO! I am not your 'test subject', pet. You only want me to get a reason to kick my ass!"
Pause.
"Well…will you hurt me if I say yes?"
Growling.
"Fine. But just this once. And you owe me for this."
"Thank you!"
Smacking sound.
The door opened, and two blonde heads went in. Malfoy paled. He was in a nightmare. Professor Summers was the madwoman from Diagon Alley - and the other one was William the Bloody - the reason he was sleeping with the lights on.
"Hi! Sorry we're late, I just had to make Spikey here change his mind about being a victi…ehrm…testsubject...for this class." Buffy smiled chirpily.
"I'm Buffy, or professor Summers, but I hope you'll call me Buffy, 'cause professor makes me feel old. You may only call me professor if you are in big trouble. And if you are, I'll tell you. The bleachblonde vamp over there is Spike, or William the Bloody."
Lots of gasps.
"Alright, so this is your Fighting Skills class, right? Right." Faith said. "Down to business then. Today we though we're gonna do a little demonstration so you'll know what this is all about. Or actually, two demonstrations. B, if you would be so kind…?"
"Of course, 'F'." Buffy started to made a flick with her wand…
"Buffy, no!" Faith screamed, but too late.
"Evanesco!"
POFF.
Desks, chairs, and students disappeared. Buffy blinked. Faith and Spike groaned.
"Oops?" Buffy said sheepishly, and then shrugged.
"Well, no worries, I'll just turn them back…"
"NO!" This time, both Spike and Faith screamed.
Buffy pouted.
"But…"
"Really, no," Faith said. "I'll get someone who can handle it…"
She hurried out of the room.
Spike turned to look at Buffy who was still pouting.
"What exactly were you trying to do, pet?"
"I was gonna make room. For us to fight on."
"Uhu. And what is the point of teaching the kids how to fight if the kids in question doesn't exist?"
"It wasn't my fault! It was only supposed to be the furniture…I can't help it if I'm mega-powerful…"
Spike raised his eyebrows.
"Mega-powerful? You mean without any bloody control?"
Buffy glared. They were interrupted as the door flew open, revealing Faith and Remus.
"Oh, bloody…" Spike sighed. "How exactly is bringing the boyfriend going to help?"
Faith raised her eyebrows and pointed at the now empty room. "Spell went wrong." She pointed at Remus. "Wizard fix it."
Spike blinked.
"Good idea."
Remus looked around the room with a small smile playing at his lips.
"Okay…what happened?"
"Buffy," Faith and Spike chorused.
"Ah," Remus nodded in understanding. "What did she try to do? A vanishing spell? Or an invisibility spell?"
"Vanishing spell," Buffy muttered.
Remus sighed, and scratched his head.
"Well, it takes a damn lot of power to make everybody and everything disappear like this…I'm not sure I can restore it…"
"But…you're a wizard, right!" Buffy started to sound panicked. "So…just…do your magic-mojo and fix it!"
"It's not that easy…It would be best to get the Headmaster, but he's at the ministry in an errand…maybe McGonagall…or Lily…"
"Hey, time's running!" Spike said. "And I don't think it's healthy for the kids to stay…gone."
Remus sighed.
"Good point. I'll try, but if it goes to hell, get McGonagall."
He lifted his wand over the room and a stream of golden sparks flew out, covering the room in a yellow shimmer.
It took ten whole seconds…and then something started to happen. You could see contures of people and furniture…it took another five minutes before everything (and everyone) was completely back and visible. Most of them looked really disoriented.
"Okay…wow…head's spinning…" Dawn muttered. "What happened?"
"B tried to vanish the furniture, and ended up vanishing everyone," Faith explained. Buffy glared.
"Like you could do any better."
"I didn't say I could. But I'm not stupid enough to try," Faith smiled sweetly, and Buffy glared some more.
"Faith…" she said warningly.
"Hey," Spike said. "Not that I don't want to see you two kick eachothers asses, but that could wait 'til it's your turn."
Faith smiled brightly.
"Good idea. B, time for you to fight with Spike. Take out your aggressions."
Spike gulped, as Buffy smiled and moved closer.
"Umm…I just remembered I've got an appointment with...eh...the school-nurse...yeah, the school-nurse…you can fight…I don't mind."
Remus, who'd been vanishing the furniture (and leaving the students as they were) smirked, and leaned against the wall. This should be interesting.
"Oh, this is great!" Someone suddenly interrupted. Everyone turned to look at Malfoy, who'd been the one who opened his big mouth. (Who else?)
"What is, mr…Malfoy?" Faith asked, lifting an eyebrow.
"We've got a magically disabled Slayer as a teacher, and nobody bloody cares!" Malfoy exclaimed. "We could have ended up dead! Or worse! It's clear she has no idea what she's doing. I mean, you seem pretty normal - " Malfoy gave Faith's body an appreciated glance, which made Remus' eyes glaze over with anger. How dared he…?
" - But she's clearly out of her bloody mind!" He exclaimed, as he pointed a finger at Buffy, who pouted a little.
"Draco," Faith said calmly and walked closer to the boy. "I would say Buffy is the most normal of all of us in here." Her face was only inches from his now…
"After all, Spike over there is a vampire, Remus a werewolf, and you a flying slash bouncing ferret." She smirked. "But still, I am the one who's clearly the least normal of all of us."
"What? Because you're a Slayer? So is she! And you didn't try to kill us!"
"No…but I have killed, which is more than you can say about B…and I'm not talking about demons or vampires…I'm talking about humans."
The silence was deafening.
"Yes, Draco," Faith said. "Humans. Living, breathing, laughing, innocent humans. Can you think? Li'l, ol' me. I was known as the 'rogue' Slayer. She-who-went-bad. So you better not piss me off." She turned around and walked back to the desk.
"My father will hear about this," Malfoy said shakily. Faith smirked, but did not turn around.
"I'm sure he will. Say hello from me, will ya? Can't wait until we meet. It was a long time since I killed someone. And he would be a good start."
The class sat in shocked silence, except those who knew Faith wasn't serious. (Dawn, Harry, Ron, Hermione plus Spike, Buffy and Remus.)
"What's with the silence, guys?" Buffy said.
"So…she was joking?" Parvati Patil asked uncertainly, and the class relaxed visibly.
Buffy smirked.
"No." The class tensed again.
"So, Spike, up for a fight?" Spike paled, and Buffy rolled her eyes.
"I'm not gonna hurt you. Much. Faith's display made me feel less murderous. It's weird how watching someone threatening a student can make you feel so much better."
Buffy and Spike took up fighting stances.
"Okay, class, watch and learn. Try to pick up some of our techniques, moves and what we use as our help. And Faith? When you 'did your thing' I was reminded of Snyder."
"Your creepy high school principal who was eaten by that snake at graduation?"
Buffy nodded, and Faith smiled brightly.
"Thanks, B! I'll take that as a compliment!"
And then the fight started. The students watched in awe as Spike and Buffy were going at it. They had to move out of the way on more than one occasion. From time to time their (frightened) looks darted over to were Faith was standing, talking silently to Remus.
"A bit…sloppy, don't cha think?" Faith whispered to Remus as she watched Buffy doing a quite hard move at Spike.
"Nah, I think she's holding back," Remus mused. "Saving herself for her fight with you later."
Faith nodded slowly. "Yeah, that must be it. Maybe it's unfair? Letting her take me on directly after Spike? Maybe I should fight Spike too…?"
"And you really think he'll let you? If he can stand when Buffy's done with him, I'd be impressed."
Faith frowned. "Good point. Maybe we should wait 'til next class…but we really wanted to let the students start fighting then…and use some of them as demonstrations…" She smirked evilly.
"Are you thinking of a certain ferret?" Remus asked, smiling.
"You bet. If he dares showing up for next class."
"You evil girl."
"Don't I know it."
Suddenly, it was over. Buffy had Spike pinned to the ground, stake over his heart. (Although it was a plastic one.)
"You're dead." She smiled brightly.
The class stared in awe as Buffy helped Spike to his feet.
"So, ready Faith?"
"Sure am. Are you? You look a bit tired. Are you sure we shouldn't wait 'til next week?"
Buffy glared.
"Are you kidding me? Bring it on."
"Fine," Faith jumped down from where she'd been sitting at the desk, gave Remus a quick kiss (the students blinked. Did they just see what they thought they saw?), and took up a fighting stance at the floor.
The boys were practically drooling.
"Girl fight…" Dean Thomas hissed, eyes almost bulging out.
"Yeah…" Seamus agreed. He had a very dirty picture in his mind right now… (Naked women. Sweaty women. Lots of mud.)
Dawn rolled her eyes.
"It's like they think they'll be pulling eachothers hair or wrestle or something," she whispered to Harry, who just nodded, his eyes never leaving Buffy and Faith.
"Harry? Harry!" Dawn hissed. When she didn't get an answer, she turned to Hermione who were busy poking Ron in the side, and hitting him in the head with her books, without getting any reaction. Dawn thought she saw a little drool.
They caught eachothers eyes, and sighed. "Boys."
"Alright," Buffy said. "Same rules as for the first fight. Check out our techniques, moves…not our breasts and asses, boys. I know what's going on in your heads right now. This is a lesson, not a game." Most of the boys woke up at this, some looking a bit guilty.
"Ready?" Faith asked Buffy.
"As ready as I'll ever be."
"Try not to stab me this time, 'kay, B?"
"'Kay. Besides, that was only once. And I don't have a boyfriend to save this time. Charlie hasn't been poisoned."
"Oh, but he has. Poisoned by the Buffy-charm," Faith smirked, and made her first move.
"Like Remus is much better. He's like your little puppy dog. All smitten, following you around, doing barking sounds."
"I think it's supposed to be wolf…kid. Um…cub? And he doesn't do barking sounds. More like…moaning."
Buffy stared at Faith until it fully sank in what she was saying.
"Oh, Faith, gross! I so did not need to know that…umph!"
Faith hadn't wasted the opportunity, and Buffy found herself hitting the back wall, quite hard.
"Your own fault, B," Faith answered. "But just so you know…he's a real wolf. I finally understand what Red saw in Oz back in SunnyD. If all werewolves are just as…wolfish as Remus is, I would have hooked up with one a long time ago."
Buffy could only stare, looking slightly sick, and soon found herself kicked across the room. Again. During the meantime, Remus who'd been watching the fight, and heard the conversation, looked like he wanted to sink through the ground out of embarrassment. That Spike looked at him, smirking, and that the students where looking from the fight, to Remus, to Faith, to Remus and back to the fight, and then Remus again, gawking all the time, certainly didn't make it better.
'Merlin…what the Hell did I get myself into starting to dating Faith…?' He thought, and then smirked to himself.
"Well…at least I'll never have to be afraid of getting bored…" he muttered to himself.
The students where now whispering among themselves. "Professor Lupin? Faith? Eeww." "That's so cute!" "I actually never noticed how cute he is…" "Faith is hot…how the hell did he manage to catch her?" "He must be twice her age…" "So sweet…"
"Getting tired, B?" Faith asked, as she gave Buffy a straight uppercut in the jaw.
"Nope. I think you should be worried, Faith."
Kick.
"About what?"
Hit.
"The students will be talking. For weeks after this."
Kick, hit, hit.
"Can't wait. I'm only happy I can bring some pleasure to their miserable lives. Gives them something to do. Except homework."
Hit, kick, kick.
"Sure you can handle it? Some might not approve that you're dating a werewolf. If you haven't noticed, this world is kinda prejudiced."
Kick, hit.
"The world is stupid."
Hit, kick, hit.
"Might be, but it has laws. I think werewolves are considered as 'dangerous creatures who should be executed'. Not that I agree.
Hit.
"Screw the laws. And they're stupid if they think Remus is dangerous."
Kick.
"You're not afraid of what they can do?"
Kick, hit.
"I've never cared about laws before. And it can't be forbidden to love someone, right?"
Hit, kick.
"…"
Kick.
"Right?"
Hit.
"…"
Hit.
"B?"
Kick.
"Love?"
Faith blinked and stopped.
SMACK.
"I win," Buffy smiled brightly as Faith found herself flat on her back.
"That's cheating," Faith hissed.
Buffy just smirked.
"Need a hand?"
"Sure," Faith took Buffy's outstretched hand, and pulled her down with a loud THUNK beside her.
"Oumph."
"Call it a draw," Faith breathed.
A/N: I hope you liked it, I'm actually kind of pleased this time. LOL. It was a funny chap to write. Okay. Anyway, please REVIEW!
/Ida