AN: I'm sorry this took such a long time to come out! LOL I hope you like this chapter, too. The next one is already written and on the way. Probably will come up in a couple of days' time.
…
"But man, this village is pathetic." Imposter Gojyo commented as soon as they calmed down and were onto more pressing matters. Like themselves, for example, and how long they should stay here.
"I think we'd better split soon before things fall apart and we're found out," Imposter Hakkai spoke. They'd been discovered a couple of times before, and the results had not been pleasant, to say the least. And besides, he didn't think he could stand another day of measly vegetarian hamster food.
"I know." Imposter Sanzo replied, almost half-asleep.
"Oh no you won't," a new voice called from the darkened area in the corner of the room.
They all immediately stiffened at that, all thoughts of sleeping gone for the moment. "Who's there!"
A pale-skinned, vaguely handsome demon emerged from the shadows. Upon seeing him, Imposter Qing screamed and fainted, dropping heavily to the floor. "I've got something I want you guys to do."
"W-who the hell are you?" Imposter Goku demanded, feeling a chill of apprehension slide down his spine.
"You're a youkai?" Imposter Hakkai asked, trembling slightly.
The demon laughed derisively. "What do you think? Stupid humans."
His eyes flashed red, and all of them collapsed, caught under the spell. Lightly, the demon landed on the table and chuckled darkly to himself. Now, it was time to deal with the other Sanzo-ikkou. And he had just the thing to do the job.
…
Hakkai's eyes widened as he inhaled sharply. That's…!
Sanzo was already wide-awake as he sat up on the straw bed. "Looks like another ambush has arrived." He commented boredly.
Qing's quiver of arrows were already strapped to her back—it was very rapidly becoming a habit for her—and she was toying with her bow, not quite knowing what to expect. "Well, at least I had a full eight hours this time."
Waiting for a demon thingy to attack was not the best way to wake up, but hey. If there was one thing she learned in the past couple of months, it was that a full eight hours of sleep in a night were few and far between.
She'd already scrambled to her feet at the first sign of danger. What with having nowhere to run, she primed herself for an attack. This was definitely one of the times when she was glad that the guys were around her; they kick more ass than she ever could—though she would rather be afflicted with a severe case of leprosy than ever, ever admit it.
A woman had her pride, you know.
"Hey, wake up, Goku." A terse Gojyo slapped lightly at the sleeping monkey's face. He was pretty much still dead to the world. It took a little more prodding to rouse him.
"Eh?" he opened one eye and grinned drowsily. "Breakfast time already?"
"Here it comes." Sanzo said quietly, his steady gaze never wavering from the place where the doorway to the dungeons should be. Qing took a few steps back, her arrow already in her bow and ready to shoot.
"What? They took our order already?" A sleepy Goku asked happily.
Gojyo stood up and stepped towards the gap in the bars. Not too long after, the jailer was thrown into the room with an entirely too spineless scream. He stared ahead, then turned to them, eyes wide in terror as he ran in the opposite direction. "Help! Help me!"
"Wimp." Qing rolled her eyes. For a guy he sure lacked a distinct manliness. How could that guy be a guard when he screamed like a girl whenever he was afraid?
There was a chorus of half-dead moaning that chilled to their bone, and the sounds of shuffling. A few seconds later, a strangely pale, blue-skinned Imposter Hakkai shuffled into the room, followed by the rest of the imposter group, similarly coloured.
"Hey," Gojyo stared. "What kind of a joke is this?"
In response to his question, all five of them turned to face them, their eyes pupil-less.
Qing recoiled in horror and disgust. "Eww!"
"Chill, baby. I'm here." The cocky kappa winked at her. His initial lust for her had already faded to one of friendship; though he flirted outrageously with her sometimes just for the heck of it, her caustic wit and inherent conceitedness was altogether too much to take sometimes. Personally, he liked his women to be lacking in those particular attributes.
"Down, boy." She rolled her eyes. "Leash your hormones for awhile, will you?"
They growled and started towards them.
Sanzo summed up the situation perfectly, not bothering to move from his makeshift bed although his eyes betrayed his tension. "It looks like they're after us."
Hakkai sighed pleasantly, still pretty much undisturbed even after seeing them. "How unfortunate."
Goku exhaled noisily and closed his eyes to go back to sleep. An incensed Gojyo smacked him. "Don't sleep, damn it!"
…
The walls of the dungeon was blown apart effortlessly by Hakkai as the gang leapt out, followed closely by the zombified imposters, who suddenly seemed to be loaded to the gills with weapons. Sanzo was glad that they took the fight to the open field; there was a lot more space to maneuver. And besides, he had an idea as to who was behind this and where the bugger would be. For all intents and purposes, he was a very intelligent man, his only problem was that he knew it.
"Their movements aren't normal, are they?" he commented as he watched them. Goku, by now, was already wide awake and watching them with an expression of interest.
"It appears that they're controlled by someone." Hakkai responded, frowning at the group. It was obvious that they weren't dead yet, only mere puppets for someone—or something—more insidious.
"Controlled by someone, huh?" Gojyo remarked. "Well, we can't let a greeting like that go to waste, can we?" He'd been itching for a fight for a while now, to see if they were any good or if they were as pathetic as they looked.
"Just when I thought she couldn't get any uglier, she surprises me." Qing observed her imposter with no small amount of contempt, her disgust for all things/people less than absolutely stunning apparent in her body language.
"Now what?" Goku asked innocently.
"Even if they're being controlled, our opponents are human. We should be careful to restrain ourselves and…" a sudden thought occurred to him. "Oh."
Sanzo flicked a glance at Goku, getting the point immediately. The monkey was notorious for seriously kicking ass in battle and not really knowing his strength. And if he got pissed and decided to bash some heads in, those heads stayed bashed. And the last time they checked, people with broken heads didn't really make for prime living human specimens, because they became kind of dead.
"What?" Said monkey asked blankly, obviously having forgotten the murderous rampage he had been on when Sanzo had been pierced through the belly by that crazed Rikudou, beating said psychopath in the homicidal maniac category.
"Goku, sit this one out," Gojyo decided to fill him in.
"How come?"
"You can't restrain yourself, can you?"
It was an obvious reference to something Qing knew nothing about. And—upon further reflection—she decided that didn't want to know. He bristled, narrowing his eyes at the amused redhead. "Jerk."
Hakkai turned expectantly to Qing, who was still aiming her arrow at Imposter Qing and looking like she was about to let her arrow fly any instant. "Miss Qing?"
"What?"
"Did you hear what I just said?" he enquired. If she could not be reasoned with, drastic measures would have to be taken.
She made a face and reluctantly slipped her arrow back into her quiver. "Drat."
Imposter Hakkai, though green in the face and zombified, could apparently still talk. "You don't have time to just idly stand around and chat!"
Imposter Goku was primed and ready for battle, as were the rest of the imposters. And the Sanzo gang, for one. "We're taking your lives!" Following that sentence, he pounced.
"Nyoyi staff!" As Goku's weapon materialized in his hand, he leapt eagerly into battle. And all around them, individual battles were erupting.
The townspeople had already gathered at the periphery of the field and were watching the scene, utterly dumbfounded.
The village chief, for one, simply stared. "That's—"
With a war cry, Imposter Sanzo charged at the real one, a spear in hand and ready to stab through flesh. Sadly, the man was as pathetic as he looked, because Sanzo dodged every thrust and jab with annoying ease.
"That Lord Sanzo is fighting the other Lord Sanzo…!" One of the villagers stared, amazed.
"What on earth is going on here!"
Imposter Gojyo emitted a similar battle cry and did ran at Gojyo with his shakujou.
"Hey, he ain't half bad!" Gojyo noted, impressed.
As Imposter Hakkai charged towards the real one with two broadswords, Hakkai took note of the situation. "It looks like they've been fortified with demon magic. It's probably quite a strain on their bodies."
Qing, being captain of the cheerleading team for two years running—and quite happy to tell anyone and everyone about it—had put her reflexes to good use as she jumped away from the giant ball of fat careening towards her. Imposter Qing's battle cry sounded like a banshee in pain, and Qing cringed. "Strain? On fake Sanzo guy, Goku guy and Gojyo guy, maybe. My imposter looks like she can power a small island for a whole year. Yours, too."
"I don't think size will matter, Miss Qing. Whatever it is, they will not be able to stand it for long periods of time. What are we going to do about it?"
Gojyo stopped his imposter's downward stab with his own shakujou easily. "Ain't it obvious?"
Goku landed easily on the ground, revved up from the fight. "Simple! We just hit 'em hard enough to knock them out and not kill 'em." He leapt up again and slammed his Nyoyi staff hard into Imposter Goku's stomach, sending him keeling over, unconscious.
Qing nodded, wide-eyed. "That works."
"Of course!" Gojyo jumped up and landed behind his imposter. Before Imposter Gojyo could turn around, an expeditious blow to the head rendered him senseless.
Hakkai flipped his imposter over in an impressive display of martial arts precision and said happily. "Everything's okay on my end, too!"
Imposter Qing erupted with another banshee-in-grievous-pain cry and charged yet again, having no weapons and therefore obviously trying to use her bulk to crush the other woman to death, or something.
For someone who was pretty much relatively new to fighting, Qing simply reared back this time and landed a square punch right in the centre of her imposter's pudgy face. The woman fell like a ton of bricks, and Qing swore that she felt the earth shake upon impact.
"I've been wanting to do that for awhile now," she snapped, very much liking her current status as kickass chick—then gave a pained yelp as she shook out her hand. "Owww. Ow!"
Imposter Sanzo was the last to go. He tried once again to run Sanzo through with the spear, but this time, Sanzo was more than ready. In a swift move, he'd disarmed the man and gave him a rockin' roundhouse punch that sent him flying.
"Right." Sanzo looked back at his teammates. "All that's left would be—"
Goku cheered. "Five for five!"
"Nice workout, eh?" Gojyo smirked.
"What's her face made of, metal?" Qing demanded hotly as she examined her hand.
Hakkai peered back at the unconscious woman. "You did give her a good one there." Then he smiled. "Let's let Sanzo handle the rest, then."
…
The demon, who was currently squatting on the roof of the village jail, stared down at the victorious group, arms crossed over his chest. Well, that had been a less entertaining show than he thought it would be, but hey. At least one group was down for the count. "They sure didn't last very long," he sighed to himself. "Ah well. It's not like I care about either side."
"Because they're both your enemies, right?" Came a new voice.
It should be said that this particular demon was either used to having long rambling conversations with himself or was pretty much slow on the uptake, because he simply shrugged. "Yeah, plus it's much easier if they kill each other," he said agreeably, then stiffened and turned when he realized that it was not his brain talking to him. "W-who's there!"
Standing behind him, swathed in moonlight, stood Sanzo, a hand on his hip.
"S-S-Sanzo! How the hell did you find me here?"
Sanzo rolled his eyes. Some demons were just too dimwitted to allow to live. "Are you stupid or something? You had to emit your psyche to control those humans. How could I not notice that demon stench?"
The demon smirked, apparently having regained his wits. "Nothing less from the esteemed Sanzo. But can you dodge this!" Sanzo leapt out of the way just as a fireball whizzed past him.
From their vantage point on the ground, Goku grinned. "Hey, it's pretty flashy there, Sanzo!"
"You go, dude." Gojyo called cheerily as fireball after fireball erupted from the demon.
"You're an idiot after all." Sanzo muttered to himself, ignoring his teammate's comment and raising an eyebrow at the demon. Which normal person would just blindly keep blasting fireballs without even strategizing? Oh well, this was going to be a relatively simple task.
"Now you've really pissed me off!" the offended demon growled as another large fireball arced at him. "Sanzo, your life is mine!"
Sanzo ducked, already bored.
Undeterred, the demon kept firing, getting angrier and angrier by the minute. At least one of them had to hit!
"Why, you…Hit him, damn it!" And again with the not very intelligent behavior. Talking to one's own fireballs was definitely not a sign of smarts.
Beyond them, the night had already faded away, and the sun was beginning to rise. Clasping his hands together in the secure knowledge that the moron could not hit him even if his entire family tried, Sanzo started to chant.
As the sun began it's upward trek, the blond priest's prayer grew more intense, until finally—
"MAKAYI TENJYO!"His sutra exploded from him in a mass of tentacles, trapping the demon.
Below them, the villagers gasped in shock and amazement. "That's—!"
The village wise man, who had told countless stories of the Sanzo who had protected their village, gasped. "That's exactly what happened in the stories!"
"Then that's—"
"Yes, that's the real High Priest Sanzo!"
Said High Priest cocked his S&W and blasted the demon to kingdom come. The battle was over.
"Hmph."
…
Below him, the imposters were already struggling to get to their feet, which was no mean feat considering the beating they'd taken.
Groaning, Imposter Hakkai clutched his head. "Man, I hurt all over…"
"My head hurts…" Imposter Sanzo whined. He was about to keep on complaining when he realized the sudden silence of his gang. He turned to see what was it that had stunned them, and yelped.
"So you guys are finally awake, you fake pieces of crap." Gojyo drawled, standing over them with his arms crossed.
"But man, you guys don't even look like us!" Goku said indignantly.
"That was the point I've been trying to put through all along!" Qing told him peevishly. "But did anyone listen? Nooo." She glared down at the bruised and beaten 'Qing'. "And YOU. Mixing purple and green just makes you look like a demented dinosaur, okay? God, who does your Dumpster-like fashions? Barney?"
Imposter 'Qing' growled.
Hakkai was still very much amused with the entire thing. "Imitating us is dangerous, so I recommend that you do not do so anymore."
They cowered. Somehow, this man scared them all more than the others combined.
"Oi."
Or not.
Imposter Sanzo looked like he was on the verge of wetting his pants at the sight of Sanzo. "Y-y-yes sir?"
"Get out of my sight."
With terrified whimpers and half-shrieks, the five imposters hauled ass and strived to disappear from there as fast as humanly possible.
…
"Damn it!" Imposter Sanzo—having already regained his wits—swore as they trudged towards the setting sun. Now that he was safely away from those monsters, he was free to express his anger. "We got driven away like common trash!"
"It's all because of those bastards!" Imposter Goku agreed angrily.
"And that bitch!" Imposter Qing snapped, her face already purple with fury. "How dare the girl talk to me like that? Oh, I am going to get her…"
It was then that they noticed four people heading their way.
"Who the hell are you people?" Imposter Gojyo asked rudely. He was not in the mood to be polite after what just happened.
The two groups stopped. Kougaiji looked them over, a look of vague amusement on his face. Was it him, or did they resemble the blasted Sanzo-ikkou?
"I should be the one asking that question."
"Quit screwing around, man!" Imposter Goku crowed, puffing his chest out importantly. "Do you know who he is? He's the great Genjo Sanzo! And I'm the powerful Goku!"
"I'm Hakkai! You're going to regret messing with me!"
"My name is Qing, and you'd better make way for us before we pound you into the dirt! Now move it!"
Kougaiji looked even more amused as he looked the last speaker over. She looked like the typical overfed housewife and obviously had tried to dress like a hooker. Briefly, he wondered what that girl's reaction would be if she saw this woman now. The results would be nothing less than absolutely hilarious.
"Well?" 'Qing' crossed her arms in front of her entirely too generous bosom.
…
"Let's go," Kougaiji tossed to his henchmen ten minutes later, feeling very much gratified. "They're wasting our time."
As the Kougaiji team went merrily on their way, the downed imposter Sanzo group were groaning on the floor, beaten up and bruised beyond recognition.
All's well that ends well, indeed.
…
Pretty Stupid Girl: Heh, I'm not quite sure who busted them out of there because they didn't show it in the anime, but I'm pretty sure Hakkai was the one who did the honors… LOL the imposters are pretty weird, aren't they?
Risikah Tziporah: Thanks! I hope you enjoyed this chapter too! Though it's a little short…
SukiLovesAnimeLOL I hope you like this chapter!
Sanzo-sama's lover: Ooh, you liked that line, huh? LOL I thought that was pretty funny, too. Thank God you don't think Qing is a Mary-Sue. She's got a mean streak like the river Nile or something. I guess this story is where she grows up and learns how to be nicer, although it's going to be a very slow process, since I'm trying to make sure she doesn't hog the limelight. Hmm, Kougaiji and Yaone, huh? I think I could do that. I always thought they made a pretty cute couple, since Kougaiji is predisposed to being more of a good guy than Sanzo will be. Weird, but that's what I think.
Koumyou Sanzo and Qing's ancestor, huh? I guess you're going to have to find out in the later chapters, then… LOL, it's a secret! But I suppose you could glean quite a lot from those couple of sentences, though…