DAY 1

The president watched as Olimar and Louie's ship flew off, back in the planet of the Pikmin. The ship was now out of Hocotate's atmosphere, out of sight. The president slowly walked off to his building. He walked in and climbed up the stairs, as the elevator was broken. His floor was the highest one in the building, the 23rd. There was nobody else in there, everyone had been fired so that he would not have to pay them. Its was very silent, and the only noise was the one of his footsteps echoing as he climbed. He was also muttering something to himself.

"Hmm... Will I ever get out of this pure crap alive? Well, luckily the debt I owe is to Happy Hocotate Savings & Loan... There's nothing left to repossess... Yeah. And those buggers I sent to that big planet will probably get out of there with my money... If I don't, I'm just in deep shit... And so will they."

He finally arrived to his floor after climbing about 2000 steps. The floors were full of garbage and dust, as there was nobody to clean it. He opened the door to his office and slowly walked in. He sat down on his broken chair and started arranging his messy desk. He made two piles of paper. A very small one saying, 'Fan Mail', and the very big one saying 'Hate Mail'. His life was really bad. Well, at least his computer worked. He turned it on and opened a file that let him know what Olimar and Louie are ding right now. These words appeared on the black screen:

Arrived at the planet. Louie lost. Pikmin found.

The president sighted. That was a good start all right. He was anxiously waiting for more words to appear on the screen, but nothing happened. He waited, and at last the words, 'Louie found' appeared on the screen. Well, at least they did something. The president turned his chair and looked through the window. Some time ago, he would have checked the progress on everybody from this window. It was a real good sight. But now there was nothing left. Trash littered the place and there was there was nothing there except for some broken machines that nobody would buy. It was like a big trash can. A very big one.

The president turned back again and kept on staring at the screen. It was still saying the same thing, no news. He was looking at the blank screen of his broken TV. He used to own a big-ass plasma screen to watch the channels, but he sold that and now all that was left was thing snail-sized thing that nobody would buy. Could his life be any worse? He kept staring at his screen. He was getting sleepy and in five minutes he fell asleep.

He woke up hours later. He looked up and at the screen. These words appeared there:

Arrived at the planet. Louie lost. Pikmin found. Louie found. Treasure found. Treasure being carried back... progress- 100. Worth 250 Pokos. 9750 Pokos to go. Notes:

The president felt a little bit better. It was going fine, and 250 Pokos were already enough to buy a small TV show. He started writing down notes. This is what he wrote:

u found j00r 1st bit o treashur, took u long enough. mai futoor depends on ur effords so chek ur treashur hord regularly. ill chek in often keep up da pace r ill kill u via a bug ill send thru email so mov it mov it.

Yeah, that's how he wrote, chat-style. It was getting night and the P was getting hungry. He got up and walked down the unlimited stairs. He had a brown coat on and his hands were in his pockets. He walked out the broken door and noticed that it was an unusually cold and silent night. He walked to his old car and noticed something strange. Graffiti were all over it. He walked around it, reading the notes. 'Shyacho SUXXX!', 'U poor faggit', 'U hobo u don't deserve 2 liv in a building'. That's what he read. He ignored everything and jumped in. He turned on the engine. At least that worked. He slowly drove to his favorite restaurant. At least he had friends there... As he was driving, everybody was looking at his car. P ignored all of them. 'They can't understand', he thought to himself.

He got there, and he opened the door. Inside was nice and warm. He was the only costumer. A waiter was cleaning the dishes and looked up.

"Hey Shyacho!"

"Hey, Bob."

P closed the door and walked inside. He took off his coat and set in on an empty seat. He sat next to it. Bob walked over to his table.

"Shyacho, didn't you read the sign outside? It said, 'CLOSED'. And you know we're closed on Wednesdays, anyways. Are you OK? You look so depressed..."

"Oh. It's closed?"

"Yeah, but we can still serve you. What do you want?"

"Can you bring me that steak? The juicy one with fried potatoes around it, you know... And some red wine. It's cold outside, I need something strong."

"Coming!"

Bob walked away and into the kitchen. P was very bored. He grabbed his coat and checked the pockets. He found a picture of his family. He grabbed it and took a look at it. Him, his wife, and his two grandchildren. His two grandchildren. P had lost them a couple of years ago, when a car hit the three of them while they were out on a little walk. He made it alive but the two kids died. P wiped off some tears and put the picture back in the coat's pockets. He was now anxiously waiting for his steak to come. And at last it arrived.

"There you go, a nice 'Shyacho-style' steak with some fried potatoes. Red wine of the house. Enjoy."

And Bob walked off. Shyacho took a bite from his steak. It was his favorite dish. He was really happy, for no reason. He kept on eating and drinking.

He was done. He paid the price of 16 Pokos and thanked Bob and the cook. He grabbed his coat and went outside. He hopped in the 'decorated' car and drove all the way back to the building. He climbed those damned stairs and into his office. He took off his shoes and coat and sat down on a comfortable sofa. He eventually fell asleep a couple of minutes later.

My first non-humor, please review. NO FLAMES. If you don't like this just send a review saying what I should improve on. Please R&R.