Disclaimer: You wouldn't believe how hard I cried after I learned that I didn't own Inuyasha.
Author Note: I apologize for the slowness of my updating. New semester a shitload of new work. Anyway, here's chapter 22, and it's most likely what the majority of you have been waiting for.
"Get up, moron!" Inuyasha snarled, kicking at Kouga's tanned leg. A moment's previous the wolf-demon, winded from the pursuit of Kagome and Naraku, had slumped down against a tapestry-covered wall, his breath coming out in staccato gasps. Needless to say, this had left Inuyasha much chagrined, and he wasn't going to take it sitting down.
"Naraku's not gonna wait for us to rescue her, ya know!" he snapped at his temporary confederate, kicking out at him again. "We need to get going!'
Kouga glared at the pushy hanyou, his blue eyes looking even icier than usual. "What good am I against Naraku if I don't even have any energy to fight him, you dolt!" he snorted angrily. "That's your main problem, you always rush into everything without even thinking!"
"Oh, and were you thinking when half your tribe was killed off by Naraku and you decided to blame me for it!" Inuyasha snapped, whirling around so that his back was turned towards him. "Though I'm supposing that would have been a perfect excuse just in order to carry Kagome off if you had killed me!"
Fed up, the wolf demon let out a low growl. "Oh, go bite the mailman, you stupid bastard!"
"And why don't you get neutered! Maybe then you won't be trying to jump Kagome every time I turn my back!"
"Oh, are you still on about that! Maybe if ya woulda owned up to her from the start and hadn't played those stupid little games to make her think that you hated her"
"Stop putting your snout into my business, peabrain!" Inuyasha hissed, looking at Kouga disdainfully over his broad shoulder. "Just get rested up so we can get the hell out of here!"
There was a shuffling sound as Kouga slowly got to his feet (as well as some rather offensive swearing), and soon the two were out of the room and into another one, a stony silence dominating the proceedings. Just because they were going for the same goal didn't necessarily make them more civil to one another than before; this was only a front of convenience that would unquestionably disband as soon as they reached it.
"I don't like this," Inuyasha muttered as they turned into a dark, wet corridor. "We haven't seen an enemy ever since we left the battle; are we even going the right way?"
Kouga smiled calmly. "We'll get to where we're going eventually. This castle ain't that big; there're only so many places that we can cover."
There was silence again, silence except for the padding of their bare feet and of the occasional splash as they came upon puddles of stagnant water that had collected at dips in the floor. Even the sounds of the battle somewhere underneath them had faded long ago; all that remained was an eerie stillness that was in a way worse than the sounds of blood being spilt. This stillness ceased only when they came upon a fork in the passage, one leading left and the other leading right, neither giving an indication of where they would possibly lead in the end.
"Well, which way now!" Inuyasha spat irately, kicking at one of the water puddles so that droplets sprayed all over the duo. "We don't have time to make a wrong decision! Kagome could get tortured or raped or-"
"Why don't we just split up?" Kouga suggested through clenched teeth, peering down the lefthand corridor. "We'll cover more ground that way, and besides, I'm sick of the sight of ya."
"Sounds good," Inuyasha replied grudgingly. "What happens if one of us gets into trouble?"
Kouga shrugged. "Yell as loudly as you can. I'll try to locate ya and I'll help out...maybe."
The half-demon grunted. "All right. Just don't be whining too muchor I won't bother saving your sorry ass." He gave Kouga one last glare before going down the righthand corridor. "And if you get ahold of Kagome before I do...and if I hear you've done anything to her, well, I'm not exactly human tonight..." He flexed his claws menacingly at him, eliciting an annoyed growl in response. Then he turned away and stalked off, his nose high in the air (though in retrospect he probably should have watched where he was going, as he bumped straight into the stone wall when he should have turned the corner).
Rubbing his nose and indiscriminately blaming Kouga for the mishap under his breath, he continued down the dark corridor, grimacing every now and then when his bare feet connected with the murky lukewarm puddles scattered around. This was getting to be rather frustrating; he had been traversing these dark halls in the castle for probably something close to an hour, and he had come up with nothing. Was she even here? He didn't really want to think about that; for one thing, he didn't have the scarcest idea of where to search for her next
He jumped as the high-pitched shriek interrupted his thoughts.
Immediately turning back at the sound, he ran through the corridor as fast as his feet would allow him, instinctively knowing through both his hearing and his sixth sense that the shriek was coming from Kouga's location. As much as he would have rather let the wolf-demon go and meet a heinous fate at the moment...well...he still kind of needed his help right now...
A door lay ajar at the opposite end of Kouga's corridor, an orangish glow emanating darkly into the hallway. Slowing his pace down to a cautious walk, he carefully pushed the door inwards and entered the room within, his eyes doubling in size as his brain registered what he saw.
The room itself was richly decorated with tapestries and paintings, as well as partially screened by thick wisps of pinkish incense, made almost orange by the eerie candlelight emanating from sconces set in each corner. In one of these corners Kouga lay slumped, inert and eyes closed. At first glance he would have appeared to most as dead or mortally wounded, but Inuyasha knew better; his laborious breathing showed that the wolf youkai was under some sort of sleep spell. But he knew only a handful of people and demons who could so adeptly cast a spell like that, and one of them was-
"Kikyo," he curtly addressed the undead priestess, who was standing on the opposite side of the room near the door.
"Inuyasha," she replied to him in an equally inert tone, her miko's garb rustling loudly as she swiftly crossed the room to face him.
They stared at one another for a moment, both of them at a loss for words. He had been expecting such a confrontation for days, but now it seemed as if he had nothing to say. As for Kikyo, he didn't know why she was being so silent, as his gut was telling him that she had a definite agenda...
Finally she broke the silence. "I disappear without a trace for almost four years and I don't even get a happy reaction?" she replied to him patronizingly. "What happened to the loving Inuyasha that would have given almost anything to me on that day near the waterfall?"
The hanyou clenched his teeth as her dainty white hand brushed his shoulder. "You did something to me that day and you know it," he growled darkly. "And besides, I already knew what you were up to days ago; who else other than you and Kagome would have been able to locate the Shikkon Jewel shards for Sesshomaru?"
She sniffed rather sardonically. "You are smarter than Naraku gives you credit for," she voiced aloud, smiling as she felt in jump in reaction to her hand massaging his chest, "though you still don't seem to believe that I was taken rather than working for this voluntarily." She looked up at him, his face set taut and grim. "You do realize the amount of danger you will be in if you go on, I hope?"
"Oh, I do," he snarled, his face slowly growing crimson as her other hand joined the first one in caressing his chest. "But Kagome's worth any amount of danger."
She ceased with her ministrations, a peculiar look creeping upon her face. "Kagomemy reincarnation...yes," she said in a barely audible voice, stepping back slightly.
Inuyasha raised an eyebrow but quickly came to his senses, unsheathing Tetsusaiga and starting for the door. "Yes, Kagome! The Kagome that I have to save right now, or - or -"
He was cut short when Kikyo side-stepped him and blocked the way to the door. "Why do you go on caring for a mere shadow of me," she began firmly, "when you can have the one whom casts it! Inuyasha..."
She paused, sighing as she tentatively extended her hand in order to smooth his silky tresses. "Inuyasha, I was the first that you loved. We could have had a long and happy life together, but for the machinations of greedy Naraku. Even the years that have passed could not have eroded the bond that we once hadInuyasha, please...The Shikkon Jewel has the power to make you human and to revive me from the undead...Inuyasha, please defeat Naraku and wish for both of us to become human!"
Inuyasha shook her hands away, tears threatening to erupt from his eyes as he failed to meet those of his former lover. "Kikyo...this isn't the first time we've talked about this...and it's something that I can't and won't do." He looked up, the look on his face a determined one. "I already know what I'm doing with the Shikkon Jewel if I ever get my hands on it, and it doesn't involve you!"
"But Inuyasha, don't you remember?" she pleaded desperately, her face a mirror image of his own as her eyes swelled up with unshed tears. "Don't you remember the passion that we sharedand don't you ever wonder what could have been years ago? Try to remember, Inuyashatry to remember our passion on that day under the waterfall..."
&())(()
He had never felt this way before. Perhaps his off and on lust for Kagome had caused heat to flare up within him every once in a while, but this was different. The sheer exhilaration of it allthe droplets from the waterfall tinkling onto his rosary, the coolness of the water that existed in sheer contrast to his heated chest, the beautiful woman, her raven locks tangled and sticking against his neck, that beautiful woman who was pressed up against him and ready to give him exactly what he wanted...
They were sitting on a warm sunny rock near the spray of the waterfall, she sitting sideways on his lap and he with his arms tightly around her, his chest bare except for the rosary necklace that was cursed forever to be around his neck. They had been like this for some time; he had caught her alluring scent earlier that morning while everyone had been yet asleep, and eventually he had discovered the waterfall. It was there under that waterfall and sitting on that very rock that he had found her, and upon his arrival it seemed that she was now very receptive to his affectionate gestures. This had been a far cry from before, but he immediately took advantage of the change. Whatever was it that had gotten into his head and had told him that she wanted him to die for what he had supposedly done to her?...
He groaned for what must have been the hundredth time as she kissed the nape of his neck, dragging her wet lips all the way down to his equally wet nipple. She knew exactly what she was doingshe knew how to get to him; she always had. First with her elusiveness in those far off days when his only concern was stealing the Shikkon Jewel, then when she had been revived and had vowed to bring him down to hell in that coy way of hers, and now - now this.
It wasn't going to be long now; he could tell by the intensity of their kisses, and of the way she looked at him. It was exhilaratingthe rush of blood pounding through his ears, the whipping of the wind and the spraying of the falls shifting their mingling hair, the heat coursing through both of them that was mere inches away from allowing them to lose their decency right then and there in the pond... He stifled a moan as her hand purposely brushed one of his more tender regions; she seemed to have the same thing in mind as he did, and he was definitely more than ready.
She reached upwards to tweak his ears gently, causing him to give an impatient growl. "You missed me, didn't you?" she murmured to him softly, smiling so that only the edges of her pearly teeth showed.
"Of course I did, Kikyo," he replied quickly, tightening his grip on her tiny hands. "Every day, every secondyou were always right there within my mind." His scarred hand disentangled itself from hers as it slowly reached up to smooth her ebony tendrils.
"As you were in mine," she breathed softly, her hands clumsily fumbling as she tried to untie the string of his pants.
He sighed in anticipation as she finally unfurled the last knot; he had one last thing to say, however, through swollen lips. "Kikyo...it's all over now. You're mine nowforever. And I will protect you from harm always..." Putting his hands around her waist, he then began to push her downwards onto the rock
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
His head snapping up like a gunshot, Inuyasha suddenly let go of Kikyo (who got a nice hit to the head upon the rock), a sense of horrible urgency coming upon him. "Kagome," he breathed softly, the realization of what he was doing suddenly hitting home. "That was Kagome..."
"Why are you saying that awful name?" Kikyo demanded, rubbing her head, a hard quality entering her usually mellow voice. She sat up and looked at Inuyasha, a steely glint apparent in her eyes. When he only stared at her lifelessly, she demanded in an even harder voice, "Forget her! She is nothing to you!"
Inuyasha continued to gape at her for a moment, shock still coursing through his veins as he tried to grasp what was going on. Something felt wrong, very wrong... He looked at the woman before him, noticing a cruel glint in her eye that he had failed to perceive beforehand. What was he doing here...and why was he with HER! For crying out loud, not two months ago she had been out for his blood, pillaging Shikkon Jewel Shards from him and hypnotizing him in order to kill him! Wait a minute, HYPNOTIZING!
He forced himself upwards, almost as if disgusted at Kikyo's touch, disentangling himself from her as he did so. "You fool," she said softly, her voice barely audible over the dull roar of the waterfall. "You're not going to run away at her beck and call, are you?"
This caused him to snap angrily, "A fool, am I! Yeah, I probably am; I took your bait hook, line, and sinker! But I know one thing, even if might be the only thing I know." He paused, grimacing at the sun's rays peeking overhead through the forest canopy. "I love Kagome, alright! I don't just want her for one night, I don't just want her for collecting Jewel Shards, I want HER! Forever! I fell head over heels within the first few days of knowing her! She might be a little young for me to act on right now, but... Settling down...a litter of whiny brats...even giving Naraku every Jewel Shard that I own! I'd do all of that for her in a heartbeat!" He waved his arms carelessly, immediately regretting it when his unknotted pants almost fell down.
"So you love her then?" was the bitter reply. "Then why are you here!"
"I don't know," he said guardedly. "I was hoping that YOU would tell me."
Kikyo laughed sardonically. "It is only the regret and the darkness in your own heart that leads you here, Inuyasha, and nothing else. Perhaps you should think twice before you imply that I no longer am a part of your whole..." She paused brusquely, feeling a wave of satisfaction wash over her as his posture drooped the slightest bit. "And on top of all that, you may be a fool, but I am not! All of this time you have desired for me, yearned for me...and now you're going to throw it all away? You aren't telling yourself the truth, Inuyasha, not in the least."
But the half-demon shook his head, wholly convinced at his own words. "Listen, I - I can't be with you anymore! It's getting to the point where I have to decideand I can't give Kagome up! I can't hurt her anymore! She's managed it all for awhile now, but eventually she'll get fed up with the bullshit and leave me for good!" He kicked at the cold water going up to his knees, watching the droplets splash into the falls.
The former miko clenched her teeth. "But how can you! How can you care for the likes of her when all you see in her is me!"
"She's not you!" he shouted irritably, his face turning crimson. "She might look like you, but I've never seen two more different people!" He turned back around to look at her fully, his eyes shining with frustrated tears. "Was it ever real anyway!" he choked out, fighting to calm himself. "Was it ever real? People change all the time! Different times, different places, different people; hell, I've got all three! And can you seriously say that your feelings for me run as strong as before! I loved you; in fact, I still love you, but…" He trailed off, unable to express the rest of his thought in mere words.
She paused for a moment, looking at him quizzically. The look on his face was passionate, as if he really believed in what he was saying. But still...
"Fifty years have passed," she finally admitted heavily, sitting back down on the rock, "though we've only consciously spent only a fraction of that time..." She stopped momentarily, apparently thinking hard. "Very well," she announced, springing back up. "I will allow you to chase this minx of yours. But remember the consequences of it...foolish demon boy..." She stepped noiselessly out of the pond and walked out of the clearing, winding her way through the trees and out of sight.
Still half-shocked and his head more than a little muddled from the previous proceedings, Inuyasha continued to just stand bare chested in the pond, a multitude of thoughts swirling through his poor mind, the majority of them directly connected with what had just happened. (Did I do the right thing? I mean, I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel anything for her...) He clenched his hands so tightly that his claws drew blood in response. (Then again, part of it was her spell... I don't know if I EVER woulda gotten that hot with Kikyo much less anyone without it!)
Yes, there was the spell...and then his latent attraction for Kikyo...all the way up to his current infatuation with Kagome. (I don't know! I just don't know! I want Kagome too! Arghhh...why can I just have BOTH of them!)
And then he thought about one of the last things Kikyo had said before he had disappeared into the forest. (Very well, I will allow you to chase that minx of yours...) She had meant Kagome, right? And it was Kagome whom had dispersed the spell when she had yelled out...wait a minute...
He literally jumped out of the pond and ran through the forest as if he were on fire. "KAGOME!" he thundered, tearing through the trees at a phenomenal rate, his aim to encounter her and explain before she left him for good. "KAGOME, ANSWER ME! I NEED TO EXPLAIN!"
(Please,) he begged silently as he ran on, finding the camp to be completely deserted. (Please don't go where I think you're going... Then I'll never be able to tell you about the biggest mistake I've ever made...)
It wasn't far now, he reflected as he passed the Sacred Tree, his body nothing more than a red blur to any hypothetical passerby. It wasn't far now to the Bone-Eaters' Well, where he was sure she was heading (or had already headed, depending on whether or not he was too late). Maybe he could catch up with her and try to explain, maybe he wouldn't and forever rue that he had delayed in pursuing her, perhaps he would even catch up to her but she would hear none of it...
It was Miroku and not Kagome who came into view first; propped up against the wall, the young monk stared at him calmly, almost as if he had been expecting the hanyou for hours. Inuyasha skidded to a halt mere inches away from his sandaled feet, too winded to speak at first. When he managed to rasp a rather choked, "Where's Kago-" he got cut off with a flick of the monk's hand.
"She is already gone," Miroku said in a tone of ill-concealed disgust, "and frankly I cannot blame her."
What was left of Inuyasha's ego deflated right then and there. "But- but-"
"Why did you do that!" the monk interrupted frustratedly. "That's something that I would do, you rotten piece of slime! Kagome has been enamoured by you at least ever since I met the two of you, and you - you just -"
"Shut up," Inuyasha cut in sullenly. "Just shut up." At this point he could no longer control himself, and he wheeled upon the monk furiously. "I KNOW it was my fault, all right!" he shouted. "EVERYTHING WAS! I kept myself obcessing over Kikyo, I never showed her any respect, I didn't - I didn't-" Spurred to action by his strong emotions, he tried to hop into the well, only to be driven back by its strong wards. He was tossed fifteen feet into the air, doing a midair backflip before he cannoned into the grassy ground. Miroku looked on, outwardly calm but feeling a huge wave of sympathy for the half demon wash over him.
It was a couple of minutes before Inuyasha stirred, but when he did his face was totally devoid of any emotion. He stood up, brushing stray grass from his garb, cursing the rays of the bright sun as it happily bathed the scene below in pure light.
"Fuck it," he muttered vehemently, marching off into the trees. "Fuck it all." No one but him ever knew about the warm, wet tear that was coursing down his lean, brown face.
&#&&(&))&#
"Yes," Kikyo breathed softly, her warm breath tickling his fine hair. "Yes...you're reliving it, aren't you?" She looked away momentarily, unable to meet his burning gaze. "...Is there anything that you regret about that day, Inuyasha?"
"The only thing I regret is how easily you snared me with that spell!" he snapped in reply, stepping away.
She sniffed coldly. "As I spoke to you before, Inuyasha," she began, suddenly growing icy rather than tearful, "that spell only works if there is a darkness in the victim's heart, and it works only to strengthen that darkness. If your feelings for me hadn't lingered, then it would not have worked." She laughed darkly. "Can you honestly say that you no longer love me?"
"I'll always love you, Kikyo," he admitted grudgingly, "but I'm not in love with you anymore. I had to start over from scratch once I was awakened, my feelings for you included!" He sighed, still unable to look her in the eye. "For all I know, maybe we were just both lonely… I didn't fit in with either the human or demon world, and I remember you telling me about you. You told me you couldn't fall in love, or - or-"
"-Or my spiritual powers would weaken," she finished for him, pushing his chin up with a finger so that he would look at her. "And they did. I DID fall in love with you, Inuyasha," she continued firmly, "and you're only lying to yourself if you say that you didn't do the same."
He gritted his teeth. "I know, but-"
"Please, Inuyasha!" she begged again. "Please do as I ask! We can get out of here, leave this place, start a life of our own… Can't you even consider it?"
"No!" he growled, trying to push his way to the door. "I don't have time for this, Kikyo! I need to save her or I will never ever forgive myself!"
At this the ex-priestess hung her head. "I suppose not," she replied softly, her arms falling limply to her sides. She stood and appeared to think quietly for a moment, saying and doing nothing. When Inuyasha moved to try to grab for the door again, however, she stirred. "Inuyasha," she began again, "by all rights I should be dead, shouldn't I? My hatred led to my undoing…I should have believed in you with all my heart. My weakness was my distrust and doubt in you… You, however, have a long time to live yet; my arrow was intended to merely put you to sleep instead of slaying you. But as for me…" She sighed, putting a hand to her chest in order to feel her beating heart. "My body is cold. Though the old witch who revived me was able to meld my body and soul back into one entity, she was still far from perfecting the secrets of life and death. My heart beats, yet the blood it pumps is ice cold. Instead of regular food I must consume dead souls in order to survive, continuing an endless cycle in which I and the souls receive no solace. Maybe…maybe it would be better off if I return to my eternal slumber, going back to the ashes from whence I came…Inuyasha, slay me!" she commanded suddenly, throwing herself backwards against the door.
The half-demon was shocked. "But - but Kikyo!" he sputtered, scarcely able to believe what he was hearing.
"Inuyasha, please!" she cut in desperately. "It's something that I don't have the strength to do by myself! Slay me, and give the both of us a chance to redeem ourselves!"
Inuyasha was desperate as well. "But Kikyo, I can't!" He gritted his teeth in frustration. "I have a few skeletons in my closet already! Don't make me do something that I'll regret for the rest of my life!"
She closed her eyes, spreading her arms as she leaned even further against the door. "I trust you implicitly, Inuyasha…now deliver me from this living hell! Somehow I feel gladdened, knowing that the last face I shall see is yours…Make haste, or your little minx will be beyond repair!"
Inuyasha froze, knowing what her words possibly implied. It was either now or neverand again he had to make yet another decision that would most definitely affect the remainder of his life.
&((#
Drake Clawfang: Problem is, the manga drags on infinitely. You have to have a lot of patience to read it, especially since the show greatly condenses much of what goes on. I'm not sure if that's good or not...
inuyashaluv0528: He just...is, I guess. I didn't even realize I was doing it until the readers brought it to my attention. He's not under a spell like Inuyasha was or anything...
Catkin Blossom: I looked for the errors that you were talking about, but I couldn't find them. Do you possibly remember so that I could take a look and fix them if I have to? I've got a spring break the second half of the month, so that's probably when I'll update again. Thanks:)
Angel 6582: Nope, Kikyo didn't lie this time. It's to the point where she knows that the truth will hurt Kagome the most of all...
Laura: Beer at a gas station? I don't think I've seen that in Minnesota...if there is, then I'm not looking very closely. About Kohaku...a valid point. He did figure it out when Kohaku said his name, but I'm playing on the fact that it's been three and a half years. Kohaku would have grown into adolescence. I also think that where I diverged from the story, Miroku probably would have seen him only once. I don't know...am I being realistic here?
earthshine411: Yeah, I thought that the 'for Christ's sake' would garner a laugh within a really serious chapter... Besides that, if I'm correct about the time period, then Christianity hadn't quite reached Japanese shores yet.
Also thanks to Mini Nicka, Lost-In-Dark, mirokugirlsadly, VcChick, lover-boy-18, Hanyou-ass, crazedsesshomarufan, x-cleverclaws-x, eveilpriestess345, hentai killer, The-Wolfish-Youkai-One, inu and kag fan till death, and Miyumi-Chan for reviewing. Ya'll rock:)