Chapter five
Okay, for this chapter I dredged up everything I know about love. I don't know much, I've never been in love. But I have read a lot of romances. Here's what I know:
Love is blind.
It's also deaf, dumb, and very, very stupid.
But it's very pleasant.
And, one other thing. There is no pain like loving someone you know you cannot have. (THAT I know about.)
Message to everyone reading, about the fluffy: IT IS NOT A TAIL. I have proof! Next time you get a chance, watch the episode where Rin (the real Rin) is introduced. He's leaning against a tree, and it's spread out behind him, and you can clearly see both sides of it. Go look if you don't believe me.
Chapter warning: More physical contact. This is not my shining moment, and actually, I don't like this chapter much. Muddle through it, the next will be better, I promise.
The next morning Rin ate and then hurried to the border of the village to look for Sesshoumaru. She had no idea where he had gone, and knew it would be useless to look for him. If he wanted to be found, he would come to her. She made her way to the outskirts of the rice paddies, then to the edge of the forest, and then into the forest itself.
But he didn't come.
Sesshoumaru, through pure force of will, didn't move.
He was better off without her.
Hell, she was better off without him.
She was fine on her own.
She had been before, right?
Well, wrong actually.
She was better off with her own kind.
She has none of her kind.
Don't be stupid, all humans are alike, every one of them.
She's the same as the marauders who destroyed her village?
Yes. No. I don't know.
See? Better off without all of this indecision.
But she'd be waiting. She'd wait for him...
She'd get over it. Humans were quick to forget.
She probably wouldn't even wait. When he didn't come, she'd leave on her own.
It's not like she asked him to come with her. It's not like she needed him.
Needed him like he needed her.
His eyes widened. Had he really thought that?
He had.
"Rin!"
He wasn't coming.
The priest was right. The word of a youkai was nothing.
He had left her.
But it's not like she cared. They'd only been a few days since she met him.
And, yeah, he'd saved her life, but not through any particular good-naturedness on his part.
Right?
That's what he said, at least.
No problem. She'd go off on her own.
That's what she'd been planning from the start.
It's not like he cared.
It's not like he missed her.
It's not like he needed her.
Needed her like she needed him.
Her eyes widened. Had she really thought that?
She had.
And she was right. She needed him, and he hadn't cared enough to even say goodbye.
She sunk to the ground, looking back through the trees at the village. Maybe that was where she belonged after all. With her own kind.
A voice popped up in the back of her head, squeaking that they were not her kind, but she ignored it.
Humans were humans, youkai were youkai. They did not mix.
And then he was there, next to her.
And he was holding her, and telling her that he was wrong. He needed her.
And didn't she need him back?
"Yes. I do."
"I'm glad."
She held him back, and they stayed that way for a long time.
"Where to now?"
"Wherever we want."
Sesshoumaru smiled, a real smile. The town was long, far behind them, and they weren't going back. Rin showed him a flower she had found with three extra petals. She added it to the bouquet she was working on.
Rin watched the ground for grasshoppers, or pretty flowers, or whatever caught her eye.
What she saw were three gravestones, set into the ground. She walked over to them, reading the worn names carved on the surface. She laid her flowers on top of one of them.
"Sesshoumaru?"
"Yeah?"
"Someday, when I die, will you promise not to forget about me?"
"I promise."
Like she needed to ask. Whether he wanted to or not, Sesshoumaru would never forget her.
Ahead of them, plains and forests spread before beautiful purple mountains.
For all the cliched horror of it, she took his hand in her own, and they started toward the mountains. More and more often they passed villages that weren't destroyed, and soon the destruction of what was behind them seemed more like a story than a real thing.
"There's so many people."
"They're probably being protected by some lord. It's more common in remote areas like this."
Sesshoumaru looked down at Rin.
"If you want to go back to one of them, I will wait for you again."
"No. I'll stay with you. I've found my kind."
"In me?"
"Mm- hmm."
By nightfall they had reached the mountains. They sat on a cliff and watched the sun go down, disappearing behind the huge panorama of Japan. Rin sat leaning against Sesshoumaru, one of his arms around her shoulder. Idly he twisted a lock of hair around one of his claws.
He knew what her scent was, now. It was human, but had something embedded in it, like a precious jewel in a brass mold. He smelled it, and it made him think of being a child again, of music, of his mother before she died, or his father. It made him think of long nights spent catching fireflies, or playing games.
Rin smelled of happiness.
But he didn't need her smell to feel that way now. Rin made him happy, just because she was... her.
He looked down at her face, to find she was looking up at him. As the sun disappeared beneath the horizon, he kissed her, and she kissed him back, and they both knew joy.
High above them, a solitary figure turned from the sight, disappearing back into the mountains.
Yes, that sucked. But it had to be done. (Kicks self in head)
Oww.
Oh, just one more little intellectual nugget. Your parents will tell you that the grass always looks greener on the other side. This is true. It's not an illusion, the grass really is greener on the other side of the fence, however, the pesticides are giving everyone over there cancer.
So while your grass might be kinda brown and straggly, at least it won't kill you.
Weiver sdrawkcab dna s'tel ees ohw yllautca sdaer eseht sgniht! .