Okay, I would have made a post about this fiction on pat reon to see if it was worth it, but I have no one there to give me feedback yet. So, here we go.
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=Beginning? =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
Mason (Dipper) Pines was a very intelligent boy. His sister would commonly tease him over his nerdiness, before he would mention the nerd that made one of her favorite things.
Such as Erven H. de Jong inventing sprinkles or Henry Ruschmann inventing glitter. Two people she now knows a bit about and defends. Erven for being a baking master to invent her favorite topping, or Henry being manly because he was a rancher and mechanic, two very manly professions.
The only thing that kept the two from truly being at each other's throats was because the teasing was all in good fun.
Dipper had never mentioned how he got so knowledgeable about so many things however, their parents never really see him doing research on anything. Dipper is usually found with a handheld game, using the most efficient method to complete it.
There are also times that Mabel has friends over and they pester him to show them some magic, which is either one of those magic tricks you can see on tv, which he then tries to explain and help them learn, or an act of science, like when he taught them how to make rock candy, which allowed Mabel to add a new ingredient to her Mabel Juice.
Now some may be wondering, how Dipper got so smart. Well, this isn't his first time through life, or even his third. Dipper has actually lost count over how many times he has gone through his life.
You see, the first time Dipper hit the age of seventy he felt like he was forgetting things, no thanks to a certain sister that teased him over little things. Mabel actually had the memory issue worse, considering she would forget that she had just teased him and tease him again, or forgot why she teased him.
So, Dipper had a plan, he would use his science knowledge, along with his mythological and weirdness knowledge, combine them, and make a machine to cure his and Mabel's issues.
Well, ever since he activated his machine, he had been able to remember everything perfectly. Too bad the Machine had a backlash and electrocuted him to death.
Since then, he has died in a multitude of ways. His second death was even in an insane asylum. Though he was the first to convince every inmate there to do the Addams Family theme at some point and managed to be remembered for it.
Dipper spent that lifetime just keeping himself in there to help the other patients out from within, and actually managed to help more patients than the doctors that worked there.
Until a female patient grew too attached to him and realized that he was sane and only stayed to help everyone. In her defense, she did try to have a relationship with him properly, until she started to feel like he was trying to help her, which caused her to feel like he was trying to get rid of her, which caused her to snap and desire to be with him in the afterlife.
That was when he learned it was not a one-time thing.
Several doctors that received anonymous letters about how to help their patients were so confused the next run through.
With this knowledge, Mason has gone through several lifetimes to accomplish all sorts of dreams.
He became a hero and went Batman on everyone, even managing to keep it from his parents, though Mabel eventually became his Robin.
He would say Batgirl, but after explaining the issues with the sexual tension between the two characters, Mabel agreed to be Robin.
She did not like the thought of people thinking about that stuff happening between her and her brother.
He later did a one-eighty and went full Dr. Evil on the world and won. In his third attempt.
It was rather surprising how often people were willing to drop a bomb on you when you threatened the globe. Lesson learned.
Side note, Dipper can remotely deactivate bombs within mere seconds, and can build tractor beams.
Dipper has lived through so many career options at this point, his resume overtook Mario's with how long it was.
And for a while now, Dipper has been bored. So, he chose to just go along with Mabel's flow once again, which leads us to now, as they exit the bus to a sleepy little town known as Gravity Falls.
Dipper has come back here countless times, some to learn from either, or both his grunkles.
He remembers when he convinced Ford to take Mabel as an apprentice instead of himself, or when he got his grunkles to take them on their boat adventures. Or when he took over the town, and either lead it to be a perfect utopia, or burn it to the ground as a tyrannical overlord.
Yes, he got that bored.
Dipper has gone through so many lifetimes now, he has dated, tortured, and saved every single person here.
Dipper has grown so bored at some point, that he has experienced absolutely every method to die.
Surprisingly, the person to kill him the least has been Pacifica.
Apparently, her parents are so messed up from the get-go in his universe, that the only way for him to get her to kill him, was if he threw her away like a broken toy. She would become so heartbroken; she would go murder suicide on him.
She actually wound up being his favorite person in the end. She has fallen in love with him so many times and in so many ways, he actually referred to her as his soulmate before.
But back to his current run through of his life.
Dipper had kept his head down this time around, mostly doing anonymous work over the internet to make a huge profit.
He has made a name for himself online, creating inventions for people for a large sum of cash.
It started as a challenge for everyone to try and prove his claims of being able to build anything wrong.
He has yet to fail.
He has made some of the most sci-fi ideas real since he was ten years old and has sold them online to turn a profit.
He has even sold some inventions to Northwest, who most likely only bought them so they could attempt to sue him when he didn't deliver the device.
They have obviously failed every time they tried.
And now, Dipper has decided to literally know everything. He remembers this time around when he tore love apart when some popular girl decided to bully Mabel.
She dumped milk on his sister's head, so he revealed truths about her that her boyfriend didn't know. And even mentioned things about her boyfriend, she didn't know.
He still asks why kids their age was even dating, but it was one of those things they saw adults doing, so they did it to prove they were mature.
Parents thought it was cute, but when they boy was too dumb to know you can only date one girl at a time, it got less cute.
Especially when parents found it awkward to explain why you only date one person at a time to their six-year-old children, or why siblings don't date.
Or why Daddy was allowed to date multiple girls.
Yeah, that one escalated way past the intended consequences, though Dipper never admitted that it was an accident that the cheating was exposed.
How was he supposed to learn about that stuff when he was barely allowed outside due to his physical age.
No one every picked on them again after that at least.
Everyone just started calling him a psychic.
He actually can't recall ever being a psychic billionaire inventor before, so it was new at least.
Alright, enough getting sidetracked… maybe.
Dipper sighed over his own wandering thoughts, as he walked over and took the signs from a surprised Stan, who didn't even get out what they were for.
"I will go hang them in the creepy part of the woods."
Stan opened and closed his mouth several times before just staring at Mabel.
"Dipper knows everything. He has never said how, or why. But he is never wrong, no matter who tries what. I have never been able to catch him being wrong."
Wendy chuckled as Soos walked over and asked several questions about things he wanted to know about, only to be reminded that Dipper knew everything, not her.
Dipper sighed as he completed the task quickly, before stepping over and opening a familiar metal tree, and retrieving a familiar journal, and walking back to the shack as he started to go over the info in the book and correct several errors Ford had made when he wrote down his research.
That guy really needs to get off his high horse.
As Dipper returned, he caught Mabel coming out of the shack. Dipper smiled as he greeted her.
"Hey Mabel, can't wait to meet your boyfriend."
Mabel pouted as she crossed her arms and huffed.
"You weren't even here, how could you know I found a boyfriend so quickly?"
"Psychic powers."
Mabel rolled her eyes at him, having gotten tired of his responses. He would on occasion switch it up. Psychic powers, simple deduction, deciphering the universal algorithm, and you just told me, were all answers he has given before. And he never used the last one in context that made sense.
It was literally just a game to him.
Dipper walked in and sat in the lazy man in the living room. Stan walked and asked about the book, looking a bit nervous as he got a good look at the front.
"What 'cha reading there slick?"
"Your brother's third journal, and yes, you can see it. After I am done fixing the calculations he had on the portal."
Stan stood there in shock as his mug slid from his grip, spilling his coffee. Well, he believed Mabel now.
Mabel pulled a boy into the room as she looked super excited to introduce him to at least her grunkles Stan. But froze when Dipper spoke up.
"Have you done what I told you to do before dating any boy at all?"
Mabel groaned.
"But it's such a silly rule you made. It also makes any boy I get a date with look at me like I'm an idiot."
Dipper cleared his throat, as Mabel pouted at him before reaching into her pocket and pulling out a whistle.
The moment Mabel blew into the whistle, 'Norman' fell apart into five short gnomes and began to beg her to stop.
Mabel dropped the whistle from her mouth as she stared at the small group of gnomes.
"I told you that would save you in the future."
Dipper just sat in the chair as he smirked at her, Stan started to chuckle at the gnomes, comparing them to a certain evil ankle biter he hates.
Mabel groaned as she picked the whistle back up and glared at her brother.
"Well, you can't really blame the guy for needing to hide the fact that he is a gnome, what girl wouldn't be cautious of a mythical creature approaching her. Though I can't defend him lying about his name, that is just silly."
Dipper rolled his eyes, letting Jeff, who stood up to stand at the front of his little group, speak up.
"So, you wouldn't mind being our gnome queen and marrying all one thousand of us?"
"Of course I don't want that. Not only am I just twelve with my whole life ahead of me, but I am not looking for a harem."
Mabel blew into the whistle a bit more as she kicked the gnomes out of the shack. Stan blinked as he picked up the mug he dropped.
"Well, that happened."
Stan walked off as he shouted to Soos about cleaning up the drink he spilled.
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=Episode 2=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
Dipper sat at the kitchen table with several magazines sitting about said table, trying his best to find something, anything, he has not read before.
He has gone through several lifetimes reading the same things over and over again, and yes, he has gone insane and went on a rampage already.
It took five tries for him to cause the apocalypse Rambo style, having made the guns he used himself. He at one point was inspired by a show called Rick and Morty when Morty went crazy with a death crystal. So he actually did that ending twice.
Mabel caught site of an ad in the paper and grew excited.
"Human-sized hamster ball? I am human sized. Dipper, bro, can I borrow a bit of cash?"
Stan, having heard her looked a bit confused.
"Why would you ask him for cash?"
Dipper looked at his uncle for all of two seconds before he responded.
"I am an independent inventor with an anonymous website where I sell said inventions to everyone worldwide. I am literally a billionaire."
Stan stared in shock at his nephew. Mabel still poking Dipper and saying please several times.
Dipper sighed as he took the magazine and clipped the order slip so he could send it in. Mabel was thanking him repeatedly as she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed his temple with each saying of thanks.
Stan shook his head to clear the shock.
"Well, mister rich kid. Are you too good to spend a day with your grunkle? For family fun day."
Dipper was actually caught off guard.
"Huh, I have been so bored lately, I completely missed what the day was. Sure grunkle Stan, let's go fishing."
Stan groaned. "Can you at least let me surprise Mabel with what we plan to do?"
Mabel groaned as Dipper smirked at Stan.
"If you would leave the joke book here, then maybe. However, we both know that you wouldn't leave the thing behind."
Stan shrugged and smirked as he put Dipper in a gentle chokehold and gave him a noogie.
They made some good time on the way to the lake, Stan not needing to blindfold them after Dipper revealed he knew already, though Mabel still wore it for fun.
Dipper and Stan pulled Mabel along to the beach as Stan pulled the blindfold off her. She acted surprised rather well, which actually made Stan feel a bit more appreciated.
As Stan and Dipper were setting up the boat to take out, Mabel got distracted by old man Mcgucket, and his story about being attacked by a sea monster called the Gobblewonker.
Everyone laughed at the old man when the police made a crack at him. Dipper just sighed as he walked over and patted the man on the back.
"It's okay, they are just upset they have never seen the beast before."
Officer blubs was the one who called the boy out.
"Oh yeah, city boy? And what makes you so confident in Mcguckit's story?"
Dipper rolled his eyes as he pulled out a device that he tossed into the water. Pulling out a screen with controls on the side, several people actually stepped up behind the boy and looked over his shoulders. And all took a step back as they saw the Gobblewonker sitting at the bottom of the lake.
"See, proof he isn't as insane as you all claim. Congrats on being proven right Mcgucket."
As Dipper walked to the end of the pier, he reached out his left hand as the water drone jumped out into his hand. Dipper proceeded to jump into Stan's boat as he pocketed the drone.
"Well, we going to fish or what?"
Stan just shrugged as he helped Mabel into the boat, leaving behind the shocked and confused crowd of citizens. Who were now questioning, if old man Mcguckit was right about the Gobblewonker, what else was he right about?
Stan got to enjoy an entire day of fishing with his niece and nephew. They wound up taking the Stan o' War back to the docks when Soos offered to let them join him in his larger boat. Which Stan agreed to so they would have more room.
As the day came to an end, Dipper found Fiddleford and Tate waiting to thank him when he was on his way out. Neither having expected someone to prove the old man right, let alone stand up for him.
And so, they returned to the shack, Dipper pulling out a small flip book he has been using to mark off the issues he has been encountering every time he came to Gravity Falls.
The gnomes and the gobblewonker were the two he scribbled out.
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=End=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
Alright, I am posting this as is, mostly to see if you all like it.
This is one of those stories that has been going through my head and has been distracting me from finishing a different chapter in one of my stories.
I also have two ideas for Naruto crossovers, one being a Naruto Total Drama Island crossover, and the second is basically a prologue that could lead into a crossover for anything, which would actually replace my story that traps Naruto in a ring.
Something I would also like to mention, my pat reon is what I have been setting up to use as a way to bounce ideas off of you guys instead of posting things in the author notes.
So, pat reon dot com/supremebandit if any of you wish to help. There isn't much that joining there gets you, but I will be looking there first for any opinions when I have questions about what I should do with some stories.