Disclaimer: We don't own any of the animes/games or characters, savvy?

Author's Note: Sorry about the length of this chapter...but the next one will be longer. We promise! -grins- Oh, and don't forget that some of these characters are horribly OOC...if you're going to be offended, I suggest you don't read it.

Reviews from people:
evilchik: Two reviews! Thanks a lot! We're glad you find the story hysterical. please keep your awesome reviews comin!
nightchild00: Thanks so much! We're continuing! Are you happy? -grins-
Zenjin: We appreciate your comments! We agree, the 'sit boy' gag would've been hysterical, but we want to refrain from bashing on Kagome, since Akuhei has a little something against her. o.O We are glad you suggested it though, because it may help us in future stories. -wink-
xsnowboarderx: You're awesome! You reviewed both of the chapters! Again, with the Kagome/Kikyou dispute. Please read above. What were Ed and Winry doing in the closet? Well, we'll leave that up to you...
Bubbles: We're glad you like most of the pairings! Thank you for being understanding about the InuKik pairing! That really makes Akuhei feel a lot better knowing that not everyone wants to bash Kikyou. -yay!- Sorry about the OOCness. We're going for the humor theme here. Btw, we are obsessive over those shows. hehe!

Chapter Three…Authoresses' REBELLION!

As everyone filed in an orderly fashion, as Al decided it would be fit, they couldn't help but gasp in horror. The whole room was full of sheep guts and green goo!

"Roy, clean it up," Riza commanded, pointing her gun at him.

"Me? Why me!" he asked disapprovingly. It was then that Riza fired at the ceiling, proving that she wasn't out of bullets. Roy got to work after that, afraid his brains would be blasted out.

While Roy and Riza were having their little fun…actually Riza was having the fun since she was the one possessing the gun, the others wandered around the suite.

"Uhhh…guys. We have a little problem here..." Ayame started, but was cut off by Kouga.

"Shit! There's only one f--kin' bed in this whole damn suite!" All the girls gasped in horror…while the guys grinned maliciously. They knew they were in for the time of their lives. "And just our luck…" he grinned, "it's King-sized." He winked…while the girls started approaching him with murderous looks in their eyes.

"What? If you girls wanna, go ahead and become lesbians, whatever! The more fun we'll have watching." Envy exclaimed.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE!" Ed screamed.

"Shuddup, squeakie," Envy replied, smirking, "the goddamn authoresses couldn't put me anywhere during the first three chapters, so they stuck me here. F--king bitches…"

"Huh? After those damn authoresses finish writing this story, we are sooo bailing." Cloud smirked.

"Umm…yeah, we'll be leaving because they'll make us leave…it's their story…" Mimori stated the obvious.

"Uh-oh! ….the hell! That means they can do anything they want with us too! They'll murder us, one by one! NOOOOOOOOOO! I want my mommy!" Ed fell to the ground twitching.

"We don't have mommies, YOU IDIOT! THEY DIED!" Winry screamed bursting into tears…yet again.

"What is with these women and hormones?" asked Kazuma, shaking his head.

"SHUT UP YOU IDIOTS AND GET BACK TO THE MAIN PLOT. YES, WE CAN DO WHATEVER THE HELL WE WANT WITH YOU. NOW DEAL WITH IT DAMMIT!" Kawaii Fantasy screamed at the little people, tired of their arguing.

"Hmmm…Kawaii, I think we should go with Ed's idea and kill them off, one by one…mwahahahaha! But, since they won't shut-up about us having control over their lives…we can do something even worse! But everyone must read on to find that out. Heehee!" Akuhei no Kyouwa laughed evilly (as her name states she is…). All the characters in the suite twitched and shut their mouths, returning to the main plot.

"Ummm…Envy? Where exactly did you come from!" Aeris asked him, rather lost at the thought of it.

"Well…when a mommy and a daddy decide to have some fun…"

"BUT YOU'RE HOMUNCULI YOU PERVERT!" screamed Riza.

"STOP RUINING IT FOR THE PEOPLE!" Envy shouted back…"Fine! I jumped out of the mini-fridge, okay bitch? Now, could we go back to the real matter at hand? Who wants to f--k? I mean, er…sleep…in the bed…later…"

"I DO!" Tidus yelled eagerly. Everyone backed away rather quickly. And so the straw drawings began!

Author's Note: Keep reviewing if you want to know what happens next!