Elliot and Olivia had been driving for 6 hours, and even though Noah had managed to fall asleep Olivia knew he needed real rest. She looked back at her poor baby. He didn't deserve this life, he didn't choose this life, she gave it to him and now her mom guilt was eating away at her. She put her hand upon his knee while he slept as she tried not to cry. Elliot saw this and felt awful, he never meant to involve her or her son, he fucked up again, but he knows he will do everything in his power to protect them and his children.
"I'm sorry, Liv" Elliot said softly when he saw a tear escape from her eye, "I never should have come back and brought this on you"
"It would've happened somehow, I've put him in so much danger, and some days I wonder why the judge gave him to me"
"Because you were meant to be his mom, Liv. He needed you, and you've given him the best life"
"How would you know, you haven't even been around" She spat, making Elliot sigh as he continued to drive.
"He needs a proper bed to sleep in" Olivia said a few minutes later
"Ok, I think I saw a sign for a motel" Olivia silently nodded.
When they saw the 'Vacancy' sign flashing they pulled into the dingy motel. Olivia waited in the car as Elliot got the rooms.
"Mommy? Are we here?" Noah asked in his sleepy voice as he rubbed sleep from his eyes
"No, sweet boy. We are stopping at a motel for the night, go back to sleep"
"I'm thirsty" Olivia looked around the car, and grabbed Elliots water bottle handing it back to Noah, before taking a sip herself.
"So slight problem" Elliot said as he got back into the car
"Please tell me it's not booked"
"No, well yes. We got a room"
"So whats the problem?"
"There was only one room" Elliot said apologetically
"It's fine, I don't care if we have to share a room, Noah and I will take one bed, you can have the other. He just needs to sleep"
Olivia grabbed Noah into her arms, even though he was older and bigger, he was still her baby, Elliot grabbed their bags and the pillow Olivia was using, he knew the hotel pillows would be disgusting and she would probably appreciate her own.
They walked to room 8 and the door opened to 1 bed, 1 tv, 1 chair and a mini fridge.
"Fuck. I'm sorry. I can take the floor"
"El, yo- what if they have a cot?"
"I'll check, but this isn't the type of place to have a cot" She set Noah on the bed and he woke up again.
"Get your shoes off and get into bed, baby" She told him
"This is a cool place" Noah said making Olivia shudder
"It's different, buddy"
Elliot began to make a small bed for himself with the extra blankets on the floor
"God these pillows are disgusting"
"Here" Elliot said handing her her pillow from home, making her give him a small smile
"Thank you" Elliot smiled back trying to make this as easy as possible, he knew this was going to be a struggle for her.
Olivia crawled into bed with her son who was now wide awake, "Buddy can you please stop moving"
"I can't I'm bored"
"Try to sleep"
"Can you tell me a story?"
"Baby, Elliot is trying to sleep"
"It's ok, Liv, I could use a story" Even in the darkness she could picture him smiling
"Ok, what story?"
"How about the time you and Stabler met" Elliot knew she was now white as a ghost
"Oh, uh are yo-, you want to hear that?"
"Yeah, I've always wanted to know"
"Uhm, ok... It started when I was just a rookie. I was working traffic stops-"
"Like the time we got pulled over?" Noah asked and she just knew Elliot wanted to hear about it, but she pushed past it.
"Yes, but he was doing it under false pretenses, anyways..." She took a deep breath before she continued
"I was working traffic, and I knew I always wanted to be a detective at SVU-"
"Because your mommy was a sexual assault victim and thats why you are here"
"Thats right, sweet boy" Elliot smiled proudly at how well she has informed her son on such uncomfortable topics.
"One day I was working traffic stops and there was a little girl in the backseat who looked scared, I sensed something was off so I created a reason for him to get out of the vehicle while I as running missing persons, I saw the little girl had just been kidnapped from a mall so I called for backup, the man was arrested and I just stayed with the little girl until her parents came to get her. All of this happened and grampa saw it all and offered me a job as a detective in his squad at Manhattan SVU. I walked in super eager and excited that I made it." Elliot was listening to the story remembering it all like it was yesterday. His third partner had just quit, he was an absolute asshole to deal with, but he knew his attitude mixed with the shit they saw everyday it was enough to drive anyone out of there.
"I saw grampa and he explained to me that I would have a partner and his name was Elliot"
"That's you Stabler!" Noah said excitedly making both adults laugh
"Grampa told me this job would be challenging, but I was up for it. As I was going out to meet Elliot face to face, a little girl ran in about 3, she tripped and hit her head. I went over to her and scooped her into my arms and started to sing to her-"
"Itsy Bitsy?" Noah asked knowing that was the song his mom always sang to him when he was hurt or afraid
"Yep, Itsy Bitsy. When she finally calmed down she hugged me tight and reached for Elliot and said 'daddy' and that's when Elliot said-
"You're going to be good here" They said in unison. The emotion in the room was thick as they both remembered that day.
"Was he a good partner?" Noah asked curiously
"The best" Olivia said softly
"Better than uncle Fin?"
"Oh I don't know, uncle Fin is so good!" Olivia started to tickle Noah making him giggle which made both adults smile at the sweet sound.
"Okay sweet boy, bedtime"
"Okay, night mama. Love you. Night Elliot"
"Night bud, night Liv"
"Goodnight, El"
3 hours later
Olivia woke up shaking
"Why is it so cold?" She asked once she saw Elliot up at the thermostat
"The storm knocked out the power, including the heat"
"Fuck, Noah is freezing"
"Here, take my sweater and this blanket"
"El, you need it too"
"Olivia, if you think I'm ever going to put my needs over a childs, especially you're childs, you a-"
"I know, I know I just-"
"Do you want to see if I can call for more blankets?" Olivia shook her head yes as Elliot called the front desk repeatedly.
"No answer"
Olivia huffed wondering how much worse this night could get.
"I uhm- do you maybe, I just was thinking, if you got into the bed, maybe the body heat will help plus your blankets and ours might help"
"Liv, I don't want to make you or Noah uncomfortable"
"I know, I just- I'm not going to let my child suffer either, so I'll put my issues aside if it means he stays warm and safe the-"
"Okay. Let's put him in the middle ok?" Olivia nodded as she moved over a bit and pulled Noah close to her as Elliot covered them in the blankets he had on the floor and scooted into the bed. Olivia wasn't worried about Elliot being inappropriate, that thought never even crossed her mind.
"Just put your arm over him if you can, he's already freezing cold" Olivia told him and he got in closer draping an arm over the small boy as his hand fell upon Olivias waist and Olivia did the same. The two locked eyes as this was incredibly intimate. Family like.
Olivia wouldn't sleep she kept checking to see if Noah was warming up and thankfully he was. The thunder was loud and made her jump slightly
"You ok?"
"Yeah, just loud thunder" Elliot always knew she was sometimes scared of thunder, but he never pushed her to open up about it. The two laid in silence once more with a common goal. Keep Noah warm and safe.
"Hey Liv?"
"Yeah?"
"I'm sorry"
"I know"
"No, for everything. I am so sorry. I don't have an excuse. I hurt you and I'm sorry"
"Thanks El"
"I missed you" He sniffled and so did she
"I missed you too. And I'm sorry I've been hard on you, I just don't want to get hurt again. I do want you in my life, please don't think I don't because I do, it's just hard for me"
"Liv, I don't have a right to be mad. I did this, I hurt you and I have to deal with that and accept the fact that it may take you years or forever to forgive me, but that's my fault"
"I want to forgive you, and in a way I have, I'm just trying to protect my heart, and his"
"you're a good mom, Liv. You're also an amazing woman" Thank god the lights were out of Elliot would have seen the blush cover her cheeks
"Get some sleep, Liv"
"Night El"
"Night, Liv"