Interviews with Random People
Black: This is Sirius Black, your reporter for the Gryffindor Oracle. Today, we have with us Mel, who is here to help give us Random Useless Information on Random Subjects! Hey Mel!
Mel: Hey!
Black: Yeah, hey yourself. So Mel, can you tell us exactly how you feel about lightbulbs?
Mel: Lightbulbs are so cool! They rock my socks off! I mean, lightbulbs are just...illuminating!
Black: Faaaaaascinating. Mel, how do you feel about History of Magic? Do you think it's boring?
Mel: Well, yeah! I love that class because all I do is sit around and pass notes...it's great!
Black: And last but not least, the very important issue of: hair color! Which hair color do you think is the sexiest for guys?
Mel: Black, of course *puppy dog eyes at Sirius*
Black: Mel, thanks for being interviewed for the Oracle! This has been Sirius Black with Interviews with Random People! The really weird show where I act like a talk show host and am really sarcastic all the time! And why am I speaking with so many exclimation points!? To find out, come back next week for another edition of Interviews with Random People!
Hogwarts students have problems, from O.W.L.s and N.E.W.T.s to boy/girl relationships to Potions homework. To help Gryffindor students with their problems, you can...
Ask Moony
Dear Moony,
I keep having hallucinations that jelly is coming out my eyes, my nose and my ears! Only, when I wake up, I find there really HAS been jelly coming out my eyes, my nose and my ears! HELP!
-Jelly on the Head
Dear Jelly on the Head,
Um, I think that you really have a problem. Did it ever occur to you that maybe your dormmates are playing pranks on you? Just wondering...
Moony
Dear Moony,
Sirius is still harassing me. He stares at me at meals; follows me around the castle; sends his dog to steal my hair brush and orange socks; has taken to read all of favorite books; attempts to engage me in a conversation about these books while I'm studying; and I caught him attempting to steal from my stash of candy canes in my hollowed out HoM book. Since when does Sirius read over-one-thousand-page epic fantasy novels and Shakespeare. And, I thought he sent his dog to get green socks. Sirius is starting to scare me and I'm getting really confused about his behavior. What is up with him?
-Still Annoyed With Sirius
Dear Still Annoyed With Sirius,
You're not too bright, are you? He likes you, duh...just ask him to Hogsmeade or something...
Moony
Dear Moony,
Is it unhealthy to see a movie three times in theaters with intentions to at least see it four more times?
-Obsessed
Dear Obsessed,
Depends on the movie.
Moony
Dear Moony,
Nobody likes me. Everybody hates me. What should I do?
-Not Emo
Dear Emo,
Just go eat worms!
Moony
Dear Moony,
Do you like fluffy little cats?
-cats
Dear Cats,
With garlic. ...um, I mean sure.
Moony
Dear Moony,
I have never been kissed and I am 12. My best friend has had eight b/fs already. I asked a guy out who was 16 but he said I was too young but he dated my friend over night. Then dumped her.
-Boyfriendless
Dear Boyfriendless,
That wasn't a question!
Moony
Do you want Moony to answer your questions? Send them to room ten, boys dorms, third door on the left, (or purplenicole@msn.com) and YOU might appear in the Gryffindor Oracle!
Wondered what's going on in Gryffindor? Ever wanted to know what's happening? Well, now you can find out from the Queen of Gossip herself...
Lion's Roar
Well, things have been very intersting. This past week, at least five fights have broken out in the Great Hall alone, with dozens more happening that go unreported, even to me, the nosy gossiping reporter! Tensions have been growing this week and it all began with a verbal skirmish in Potions between (who else?) Sirius Black and Severus Snape. Sirius made Snape so mad that Snape pulled out his wand to curse him, right in front of the teacher, and the two were down on the floor fighting, both wands gone, in less than five minutes! What totally immature pricks!
Things have just gotten worse since then. Sirius, as well as all the other Marauders, have been plotting revenge on Snape all week. How will all this turn out? Nobody knows!
This has been Alice Remerta with Lion's Roar, the Gryffindor gossip column. Have any juicy tidbits of gossip? Share it with me--slip it under dorm room 10 and it could appear in Lion's Roar!
Lioness Bad Pick-Up Line of the Day
One hears a great many things when one is in class all day long, including several very bad pick-up lines from the most desperate of subjects. Today's pick up line is:
If you were a booger I'd pick you first.
House Points Currently:
Gryffindor: 328
Hufflepuff: 343
Slytherin: 318
Ravenclaw: 325
All Materials Copyright The Gryffindor Oracle, volume 480, 27th edition--all character copyright JK Rowling. Aladdin Niadra and Alice Remerta copyright Abigail Nicole, as well as any minor characters.
Notes:Poor Random Intervewees! Mel is the next-to-last contest winner, all go congradulate her. Next is Caminna, who has dealings between a MWPP-Slytherin encounter of...interesting...variety. Heh. Anyway, love you all and REVIEW! Review! The pickup line comes from Carrie (north_softball_11@hotmail.com). I emailed Mel for the interview, but she didn't email me back, so I wrote her responses. Sorry Mel!
THE COUNTDOWN Continues... with only five episodes left! As always, check out the Writing of the Oracle (. purpleabigail/writingoforacle.html and take out the spaces) for any Oracle-related info you were always dying to know but never really knew how to get till know.