A/N- The typos and formatting has been correct in part 12. Sorry about that.

Road to Nowhere

Part 13

Jack stepped out into the hallway and eyed the bags in Rusty's hand. "Gucci? I told you to get her a laptop not a damn purse."

"She had to have something to put it in, didn't she?" Rusty asked calmly between licks of his ice cream cone which was quickly melting.

"Well, what's that other stuff?" he said pointing to the Saks Fifth Avenue bag. "And where's the cake?"

"Relax, Jack. I've got everything taken care of," he said taking a bite out of the cone. "There'll be cake at the restaurant."

"Restaurant? We're not going out. We're fugitives in case you haven't figured it out yet."

"Who knows you in LA? Especially looking like that?"

"Rusty…" Jack began in tone that would make airmen snap to attention, but his friend was no airman.

He just smiled, "C'mon, Jack. It's your wife's birthday. Make it special."

"She's not my wife."

Rusty rolled his eyes and sigh dramatically, "You used to be a lot more fun, Jack."

"I used to be a lot of things." Jack gave him one final disapproving glare and relented holding out his hand. "Hand it over." Rusty gave him the Gucci bag and retained the other one. "What about that one?"

"That's my gift."

"Your gift?"

"Well, you did say she's not your wife, so I thought…"

"You thought what?" Jack demanded and even as he said it he wondered why he had suddenly become so territorial. Sam wasn't anyone's territory. He even knew Rusty was winding him up but he couldn't stop the reaction.

"That she might appreciate-"

"Jack, what's going on?"

Both men turned to see Sam standing in the doorway looking quite perplexed.

"Er…"

"Happy Birthday, Sam!" Rusty handed her the Saks bag and ushered her into the apartment. Jack, scowling, followed. He sat next to her on the couch as she began ripping off the wrapping paper off of one of Rusty's gifts. Gifts? Jack gave him a displeased look and Rusty merely grinned back. Sam opened the box lid and Jack too busy scowling only managed to catch a glimpse of something black and gold. "Oh, wow. This beautiful. Thank you, Rusty. You shouldn't have."

"It's nothing. Just a little something for dinner tonight."

"Dinner?" she asked looking puzzled.

"Yeah, didn't Jack tell you? He's taking you out to dinner for your birthday."

"No, he didn't." Sam turned to Jack. "Is that wise?"

Jack wanted to tell her it wasn't his idea, that dinner was supposed to consist of take out Chinese and cake, but Jack saw the spark of excitement in her eyes and knew Rusty was probably right. Times were likely to be tough ahead so they should have their fun while they had a chance. So he shrugged and smiled, "Probably not, but who knows us in LA?"

She beamed at him and then tore into the next gift, revealing a shoe box. "Oh my God, Manolo Blahniks!"

"Hey!" Jack said recognizing the name. "That's those things on that show Cassie likes to watch."

"You let Cassie watch Sex in the City?" Sam quickly shifted gears and shot him disapproving look.

"Uh, yeah. Was I not supposed to?" he asked deciding to go the dense route.

"Jack, she's fifteen. The name of the show is 'SEX in the City'."

"But all they really ever talk about are shoes," he protested. "This is a shoe, right? How does it work?" Jack picked up one of the shoes and studied it. The so called shoe seemed to be made up entirely of black and gold strings. The heel looked incredibly high and very skinny. "You could kill someone with this heel."

"You'd better watch out then, Jack," Sam snatched the shoe out of his hand and lovingly replaced it in the box.

"What? It's just a shoe, for cyin' out loud. You'd think it was one of you reactor thingies."

She glared at Jack and smiled sweetly at Rusty, "Thank you, Rusty."

"Here," Jack shoved his bag into her hands. He was beginning to think this shoe obsessed creature beside him was somehow an alternate reality Carter and that his offering of a doohickey would not be as appreciated. Maybe she would have appreciated a purse more. Sam tore into his gift with the same enthusiasm she had with the other presents. She pulled the lid off the box to reveal a sleek black leather laptop case. "There should be something inside. Or at least their better be."

She lifted the bag out and unzipped it. She pulled the laptop out and screamed. Yes, screamed. Jack nearly bolted off the couch in shock. "It's a Macross ZX5000! These aren't even on the market yet!" She hugged the laptop to her. "This is the best present ever, Jack! How did you…"

"Well, obviously I have connections," he told her a pleased smile spreading across his face. "I just told them to get the fastest, most powerful laptop on the market, but it seems they did one better." He sent a grateful look to Rusty who was grinning manically as if his plan for world domination was proceeding as planned.

Sam reverently replaced the laptop back in the case and to Jack's shock latched onto him in a huge hug. "Thank you, Jack." Then she kissed his cheek. "Thank you for remembering my birthday."

"How could I forget?"

"Are you going to wear that dinner?"

Jack looked down at himself. He thought he looked fine. It was the suit he had bought in Vegas. "I'm wearing it, aren't I?" he asked Rusty. "What's wrong with it anyway?"

"You look like you're getting married," he replied then tossed a handful of Goldfish snacks into his mouth.

"I did get married in it."

"Why don't you lose the tie? Relax."

"Fine. I hate the thing anyway," Jack pulled the tie off and unbuttoned the shirt. "Better?"

Rusty studied him for a minute before standing, "That shirt's boring. You can borrow one of mine."

Jack followed Rusty into his bedroom and made a face at the iridescent purple shirt offered. "I am not wearing a shiny shirt."

"You have no sense of style, Jack."

"I'd rather not dress like a pimp, thank you very much."

"What about this one?" Rusty held out a plain burgundy dress shirt.

"That's better," Jack snatched it out of his hand.

"You're so ungrateful."

"Tell me that next time I find you locked up in some third world prison."

Jack, now resplendent in his borrowed shirt, sat on the couch impatiently waiting on Sam to make her appearance. He growled at the screen of Sam's new laptop. How could he loose twenty games of solitaire in a row? It was his specialty. He began shutting down the computer and barked impatiently, "Carter, aren't you ready yet?"

"Just a minute, sir!" she called back.

"We're going to be late for our reservations."

"I said just a minute!" Sam flung open the door and strode out.

Jack looked up ready with a sarcastic retort, but it was forgotten. "Oh, I am in so much trouble."

"Why?"

"What?"

"Why are you in trouble?"

Jack cleared his throat, he hadn't meant to say that out loud. "Because I'm going to be fighting the men off of you all night. I'm good but I don't know if I'm that good."

She quirked an eyebrow, "What if I don't want you to?"

"Then I'm gonna to be in even more trouble." He couldn't help but stare. She looked amazing. Her skirt was supple black leather that fell to just above her knees. Her short jacket was also black leather with an upright collar and three quarter length sleeves. Her top underneath the jacket was sparkly gold with a high neck that just barely left the hollow of her collarbone exposed. Jack's eyes tracked back down to the floor thinking that was probably a safer place to look but, no, her feet were there. Her feet in those impossibly high heels, the gold and black straps crisscrossing her feet and lacing midway up her calf, accentuating her long, strong legs. Jack cursed himself for being a leg man.

"If the Colonel is through with his inspection…"

"Oh," Jack guiltily met her amused gaze. "Well, you are out of uniform, Major, but I think this once we'll let it slide. It is your birthday after all."

"Most generous, sir."

Jack rose off the couch and walked over to her. "Geez, you're tall."

"Just noticed that now did you?"

"No, just never thought about until we were nose to nose."

"Well, I guess it's a good thing you're tall, Jack, short men creep me out."

"Thank God for those long legged O'Neill genes."

They had a fun dinner flirting shamelessly over champagne and later over a huge piece of sinfully rich chocolate cake covered in a cognac sauce. Later they walked a block down the street to the club where they were meeting Rusty. She decided she liked the charming side of Jack that was exposed when he didn't have to be the tough and sarcastic Colonel.

Sam clung to Jack's arm, partly because she wasn't quite as steady on her Manolos as she was on her combat boots and partly because she enjoyed the illicit thrill of hanging off Jack's arm. Being considered arm candy wasn't something she enjoyed, but tonight she didn't mind. No one here knew them. She didn't have to be Major Carter or even Dr. Carter. All she had to be was Sam. She didn't have anything to prove except maybe she was capable of holding onto the man on her arm. She didn't fail to notice the admiring glances Jack received from many of the women and a few men, too. From the looks she'd been getting from Jack all night, she didn't think holding onto him would be a problem. The problem was that she probably wouldn't want to let go of him at all tonight.

They were led through the club to Rusty's table where he was surrounded several starlets. Rusty grinned up at them, "Girls, this is Sam and Jack. Today is Sam's birthday."

Sam received a chorus of 'Happy Birthday's and Jack received a chorus of suggestive looks which he seemed oblivious to. Chivalrously, Jack pulled out a chair for Sam and then glanced around the table everyone seemed to have full drinks. "Drink, Sam?" he questioned.

"Please."

He nodded and made his way across to the bar.

Jack returned with their drinks to find the table vacant except for Rusty and another girl who was sitting very close to him. "What happened to, Sam?"

Rusty looked up from his intimate conversation, "Oh, she's dancing."

"With whom?"

"Some guy."

"Gee, thanks, Rusty. You're a big help." Jack surveyed the dance floor and caught sight Sam's bright red hair. It was a slow song but it was nearly over and her partner seemed to be keeping a polite distance. Jack sat down and took a sip of his scotch.

Rusty looked amused and feigned shock. "Jack, aren't you going to cut in ?"

Jack shrugged. After the uncontrolled flirting spanning the night so far, he knew he didn't have anything to worry about. Besides if anyone tried anything with Sam she could kick their asses easily. Fending off these lecherous LA types wasn't difficult after fighting the Goa'uld for five years.

The song ended and Jack watched her. He expected her to head back to their table, but instead she allowed her partner to lead her to the bar. Jack began to reassess their night until he caught her wink and knew she was issuing him a challenge. He took another sip of his drink and decided to make her wait a little. He watched them through the sea of people and once the crowd parted slightly, he realized she had shed her jacket and he was shocked by her completely exposed back. Her top was apparently held in place only by a thin gold chain at her neck and another midway down her back. Her skirt was resting very low on her hips and Jack was even more stunned to see a tattoo adorning the skin just below the small of her back. It looked suspiciously like the Earth point of origin symbol.

Jack, ignoring Rusty's knowing laugh, stood and made his way to the bar. Sam's partner was standing entirely too close to her for his liking. Jack came up on Sam's right side. He lightly traced the line on her shoulders with his left hand until it possessively came to rest on her shoulder, platinum wedding band sparkling on his finger. Sam didn't even move or appear startled in any way. Jack smiled pleasantly at the other man and said, "I'm gonna have to steal my wife back from you now."

The man gave Jack a once over and decided any protest wasn't worth it. He nodded politely to Sam and moved away. "Well, that was disappointing," Jack murmured in her ear. "I was hoping for a bar fight." Sam gave him a mischievous grin and he allowed his hand to leave her shoulder and trail down her back until he came to her tattoo. He covered it with his palm, the tips of his fingers sliding under the waistband of her skirt. "Major, you're exposing top secret information. We're going to have to do something about that."

"Like what?"

"Make sure it's concealed in a more secure location," he answered the challenge in her eyes with a smirk.

"Then, by all means, Colonel, let us proceed to a more secure location."

TBC

Okay, pallies, I know you're probably upset where this part left off, but you got to tell me if this is getting too fluffy or sappy or cheesy. I'm not the best judge at times.