Author's Note: The song I am using is Show Me the Way, by Styx. If you haven't heard of it, you can go to Amazon and hear a clip from the greatest hits album.

Chapter 9

Zach and Kendall made up the sofa bed in silence. While she had been upstairs getting the linens, he had stripped down to his tank and boxers. He noticed that she was looking at him under her eyelashes and debated whether he should make a sarcastic comment. He decided against it. It would probably lead to an argument, and he knew that fury was one flip of the coin away from passion.

As soon as the bed was made, Zach got into it and lay on his side facing the wall. "Goodnight." There was a long pause. "I'm not very sleepy. Would it disturb you if I went over to the reading nook and read for a while?" Without turning to look at her, he said, "That's fine. I'm too tired for it to bother me." He heard her walk a few steps and stop. "Um…I like to listen to music at night. Sometimes silence makes me feel edgy. Do you mind?" Zach shook his head. It wasn't like her to be so diffident. "I said it was fine. Do what you want."

Kendall switched on the soft lamp in the reading nook, and then turned off the main light. After a moment, he heard the radio come on. She had it on low volume, but he could still hear it. Thankfully it wasn't holiday tunes anymore. He heard the beginning strains of one of his favorite songs, Show Me The Way.

As Zach fell into a deep sleep, he began to dream in full technicolor Styx-vision:

"Every night I say a prayer in the hope that there's a heaven
And every day I'm more confused as the saints turn into sinners
All the heroes and legends I knew as a child have fallen to idols of clay
And I feel this empty place inside so afraid that I've lost my faith "

Alex Jr. was standing in his father's study. He was a boy, wearing his baseball uniform. The oversized desk chair was facing the window, so he couldn't see his father. "Father? Will you be coming to my baseball game?" The chair swiveled around, and he saw that instead of Alex Sr., the chair was occupied by Ethan. "Tell me, son. How good are you at baseball?" Alex Jr. shrugged. "I'm pretty good." Ethan nodded. "Do you have aspirations to play professionally?" Alex Jr. frowned. "Um…no." Ethan laced his hands together. "So why should I waste time that is valuable to Cambias Industries on a simple hobby?" There was a terrible silence. Then, Alex Jr heard a voice from behind him. "You bastard! Its bad enough that you aren't going to his game. Do you have to be such an ass about it?" The boy turned around and saw Erica Kane standing there, wearing her blonde wig from Vegas and a tumbler of Scotch in her shaking hand. He turned back to Ethan, who was laughing. "Your mother is quite the drama queen. Tell you what, my darling. Why don't you sober up and go to his game yourself?" Alex Jr. turned back to his "mother," but this time, instead of Erica, Kendall was standing there. She didn't have a wig on, but she was holding a glass of Scotch. Tears rolled down her cheeks and she hung her head. More horrifying than the idea of Ethan verbally abusing his wife the way his grandfather had, was the fact that this was Kendall. She should have been delivering him a punch in the nose, not standing there in abject defeat. Was this what his son would become when he took over the reigns at Cambias? Little Alex Jr. closed his eyes and whispered. "I want to go to the safe place. Take me to the safe place." This was a coping mechanism he learned as a boy from a friend who was seeing a child psychologist.

"Show me the way, show me the way
Take me tonight to the river
And wash my illusions away
Show me the way

And as I slowly drift to sleep, for a moment dreams are sacred
I close my eyes and know there's peace in a world so filled with hatred
That I wake up each morning and turn on the news to find we've so far to go
And I keep on hoping for a sign, so afraid that I just won't know"

In his dream, Zach continued to chant, "Take me to the safe place." When he finally opened his eyes, he was in the casita. He breathed a deep sigh of relief. He sat down on the sofa, and stared contentedly into the fireplace. He could hear the crackling of the fire, feel the warmth of it flow over his body. "You look happy." He turned his head and saw Maureen standing there. He smiled and held out his hand to her. She didn't move. "All is right with the world when you're in your little casita." Zach frowned. Her voice seemed to grow a little bit deeper with each word. "The only reason that's true is because this is not reality. When we met, you claimed to be Zach Slater. Not true. I claimed to be Maureen Gorman. Not true. This house is made of brick and mortar, but the home we created was as fragile as gossamer. No love can sustain such an illusion. And it didn't. I found my way back to who I was, and you were forced to come to terms with who you are." Her voice continued to get deeper and deeper until it sounded demonic.

The casita faded away and became Wildwind. "This, Zach, is my home. Just as solid as the brick and mortar that holds it together. Our fantasy ended, Zach. I've made my choice. I chose the man with whom I built a foundation based on real memories, real heartache, real love. You need to accept yourself, Zach, if you truly want to be loved. Otherwise you'll just have to go out and find another memory-impaired drifter you can mold into the perfect woman and imprison in your perfect casita." Zach closed his eyes again. He didn't want to hear this, didn't want to endure this pain and rejection. He opened his mouth to whisper "Take me to that special place." But he froze when he realized there was no special place. "No! No! NO!"

"Show me the way, show me the way
Take me tonight to the river
And wash my illusions away
Show me the way, show me the way
Give me the strength and the courage
To believe that I'll get there someday
Show me the way"

Zach felt a hand on his shoulder, shaking him. "Zach! Wake up!" He bolted upright, gasping for breath. He gazed into the fire, briefly wondering if he was back at the casita. Then he realized that he had been dreaming. He stared up at Kendall, who looked concerned. In his dream, she had been broken. She had placed her loyalty and trust in Ethan, and he had broken her as surely as Alex Sr had broken Zach's mother. Zach had plotted to seduce Kendall so that she wouldn't keep Ethan in town and make it more possible that he would find out his real identity. However, it was too late. Ethan had taken the DNA test and now knew he was a Cambias. It was only a matter of time before he took over Cambias Industries and became corrupted by power. Would Kendall become a casualty of the curse, like in his dream? Or would she tell Ethan to go to hell? Why would he suddenly become more concerned about what happened to Kendall than his own son?

"Zach, are you okay? You were thrashing around, mumbling something about a safe place. What the hell were you dreaming about?" Zach took a deep breath. "Kendall…" His voice sounded even more gravelly than usual. He reached up and gripped her arm. Conflicting emotions rocketed through him. He wanted pull her down to him, make her forget about Ethan. Make him forget about Maria. She was so beautiful. She knew who he was, in fact she hated him. Or she did until they had been thrown together up here on this mountain. How did she feel about him now? Had it come to this? Was he so starved for someone to love him that he was prepared to lay his soul bare to a woman who had a reputation for grinding men up and using them to mulch her plants? Where was the control he once had? Where was his confidence? He had swaggered into Pine Valley full of both. Now they were in shreds, and this woman could possibly be the vulture who would finish him off.

Zach whispered, "Am I real, or am I an illusion?" Kendall frowned and lowered her head to look in his eyes. "You don't look like you're still dreaming." Her long flowing hair brushed against his shoulders. He took a deep, shuddering breath and handed the reigns completely over to his little personal demon. He took hold of her other arm and prepared to gently pull her down to him, hoping she wouldn't resist. He never got the opportunity to find out.

Someone was banging on the door. "Open the damn door! Hurry up! She's coming! Open up, dammit!" Zach quickly bounded out of bed, grabbed a fireplace poker, and swept open the door. Standing in the doorway, wearing nothing but a robe, a shaggy beard, and eyes full of savagry, was Todd Manning.