Chapter 24
"Kendall, are you sure this is a good idea? I am fully aware of how much the stuff that happened last winter affected you. Now you plan to go out with him on your last night here in Paris?" Kendall gave her sister an exasperated look. "I'm marrying JR in three days, Bianca. Do I look like someone who only does things based on whether or not they are a good idea?" She went back to putting on her lipstick, and Bianca just shook her head. Miranda sat on the floor, playing with Kendall's shoes. The doorbell rang. Maggie called out that she would get it. Fluffing out her hair, Kendall stood up and did a little twirl. Miranda shrieked in delight. Kendall ruffled her hair, and went out to the living room, Miranda running ahead of her. Maggie and Zach were sitting in silence. Zach stood up. He was wearing a black sports jacket and slacks, and a grey silk shirt. He looked dangerous in so many ways.
Zach gave Miranda a big hug. When he had set her down, he looked at Kendall. She was wearing a simple black sheath dress that fell to the knee. The bodice draped softly and the straps were beaded. He sighed inwardly. The kind of dress that was made for taking off. Stifling that thought, he produced a red rose and handed it to Kendall. She gave him an amused smile, and took it. "I knew there was something missing from my ensemble." She took some scissors from a drawer, and snipped the stem down. Then she tucked it over her left ear. "Perfect."
Kendall turned to Bianca. "Could I have the key to the apartment?" Bianca smiled and waved her hand. "Oh, I'm sure one of us will be up when you get home." Kendall raised one eyebrow. Bianca sighed and handed her a spare key. Kendall air kissed Bianca, then rubbed noses with Miranda. She grabbed a shawl, and preceded Zach out the door. When they had gone downstairs into the foyer, Zach pulled Kendall to him and kissed her. The scent of his aftershave had her reeling. For several moments he drank deeply of her, then finally pulled away. Breathing heavily, she looked at him with questioning eyes. "I figured we should get the goodnight kiss out of the way now, so that we avoid any possibility of it leading to something else." She shook her head at his arrogance, refusing to acknowledge that he was probably right.
They rode in a taxi to an elegant looking restaurant. Zach escorted her into the building. "I've heard very good things about this place. I've never been here." Kendall raised her eyebrows slightly. "There wasn't a favorite place of yours that you thought I might like?" The hostess came and led the way to their table. As they sat down, Zach stared out the window at the gorgeous view of the twinkling lights of Paris. "If I took you to one of my favorite places, then any time I went there again after this, it would make me think of you."
She picked up her menu and started to peruse it. "I forgot. You came to Paris to start fresh…cleanse yourself of all things Pine Valley. Then I come barging into your nice new life, six months later. That must really be annoying." Zach tapped his finger on the table. "Kendall, if I really didn't want you intruding on my new life, I would have simply walked out of the café the moment I heard your voice." She gripped the menu tighter. "You never explained why you left Pine Valley. Was it really so…oppressive that you had to escape it like before with your father?"
Zach shook his head. "I wasn't oppressed. Most of the people in town hated my guts, but that never bothered me since I didn't like them, either. Anyway, I had the approval of the most important person in town – Myrtle Fargate. I did go to see her a day before I left. She's an amazing woman." Zach privately reminisced about the conversation he had with the town matriarch. When he told her that he was leaving, she pressed him for the details on what had happened in that past week. He told her everything. When he was finished, she looked at him with those sharp eyes of hers. "So are you planning to take her with you to Paris?" He stared at her in bewilderment. "Maria? I just told you that she's staying with Edmund." Myrtle gave him an enigmatic smile. "No, I guess now isn't the time. You have some things to work out in your head. Someday the time will be right." She nodded and chuckled, while Zach shook his head and wondered if she was a hopeless romantic or just senile. Looking back on the conversation, Zach wondered if she had been talking about someone else besides Maria.
Zach looked up at Kendall and realized he hadn't answered the question. "I came to Pine Valley to win back the love of my life and to prove to everyone that my brother was not a monster. I failed miserably on both counts. Then Ethan came along and I tried to protect his identity. Failed with that too. Pretty much every good deed I tried to do ended up causing more heartache. That night at SOS I came to the realization that nothing I did was going to win Maria back to me. And nothing I did was going to turn Ethan from the Cambias path. The only option, really, was for me to leave. If I removed myself from the equation, then Maria and Edmund could get on with their marriage and Ethan could focus on something other than revenge."
Kendall looked at him, her eyes hooded and thoughtful. "Three months ago, Edmund and Maria flew to Vegas for a quickie divorce. Maria lives in New York City now and shares custody of the kids with Edmund. Since she left, he's been trying to convince Brooke to take him back." Having lobbed that grenade in his lap, she took a sip of water. In the ensuing silence, the waiter came over to take their order. Zach asked Kendall what she wanted, then placed the order for both of them in French. When the waiter left, he looked at Kendall and she raised one eyebrow. "I bet there are flights to New York every hour on the hour." She did not give her usual smirk.
Zach sipped his water. "I really hoped that my leaving would have made things better. I feel sad for her, but I'm not going to her. The other thing I realized that night was that Maria and I never belonged together. Maureen was just as much an illusion as Zach. Our romance was a fantasy. I needed so badly to be loved that I convinced myself that what we shared would last forever, and nobody – certainly not Edmund Grey – could get in the way of that." Tears sprang to Kendall's eyes as she listened to his voice get more and more gravelly. It had been that way with Ryan. Her cravings for love and justification had been so deep that Ryan had been unable to fulfill that need. It was why she had behaved so desperately a year ago. Zach's eyes told her that he understood.
They received their first course, and spent the rest of the meal talking about generalities. Kendall explained how Babe's criminal trial and media circus had contributed to Bianca's need to get away and final decision to go to Paris. Zach and Kendall left the restaurant and took a walk through the streets of Paris. She told him about how her mother wanted her to become executive producer for her new television show. Kendall opened up about how Ryan and Greenlee's renewed desire to have a child made her feel. They eventually stopped in front of a nightclub. "Gervaise made me promise to come in and play one set for him. He said that normally he would give me the night off completely, but his sister was visiting tonight and he wanted me to play a special song for her." Kendall smiled. "Its fine with me."
They went in. A man walked rapidly up to Zach, his face full of relief. He spoke rapid French. Zach introduced Kendall to Gervaise. Gervaise bowed, then with an apologetic look, swept Zach away. Kendall ambled to the bar. "What can I get you, madamoiselle?" She looked at the bartender, startled that he spoke English. Then she realized that he probably saw her come in with Zach. "You must be Michel." The bartender beamed. "Zach has told you about me?" She smiled. "Enough to know to keep my mouth shut around you." Michel roared with laughter. When he had recovered, she requested some white wine. He poured it for her, and gave her a piercing look. "I can tell right away that you are not the one who emptied out Zach's heart." She shook her head. "You're right. I'm not." He raised one eyebrow. She gave him a hard smile. "I'm not going to be the one to fill it up, either. He's just going to have to make do with the saxophone." Michel leaned on the bar, assessing her with narrowed eyes. "So what is going to fill your empty heart, madamoiselle?" Her smile disappeared completely. She lifted her wine glass. "Down the hatch." She took a long swallow, and turned around to face the stage. Zach was just beginning a saxophone solo, much to the delight of a matronly woman at a table in front.
Kendall watched as Zach played a slow, mournful melody. A few couples got up and danced, their arms wrapped tight around each other. The cigarette smoke made the air hazy, giving Zach a dreamlike appearance. His eyes were closed, his lips wrapped around the mouthpiece, his fingers softly squeezing the buttons on the sax. Kendall took another long swallow of wine. Her head started to spin, but she suspected that it wasn't the alcohol. Not even Ryan had made her feel longing this incredible. Usually the men were piled up at her feet. Zach was across the room, not even looking at her, and she wanted him so badly. She turned around and set the wine flute on the bartop. "Michel, could I have some ice water, please." The bartender chuckled. "Do you want it in a glass or poured on top of your head?" She glared daggers at him, and he walked away, laughing, to fill her request. She put her head in her hands. It was worse than she had feared. Zach wasn't even touching her and she was close to surrendering. It was a good thing that when it came time for him to walk her home, her family would be waiting for her inside the apartment.