Author's Note: Well! I never expected the incredible response I received for the previous two chapters! Thank you for reading and sending me so many messages. If I neglect to respond to your review, please forgive me? I have tried to keep up... We are now solidly in the getting-to-know-you stage so I hope all the interactions are believable! Enjoy! Eilie

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Chapter Eighty-one

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Anticipation

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Awakened by his alarm clock in the darkness, Nathan turned to quickly stop the noise, then rolled back and slowly opened his eyes. Much as he loved every season, this time of year was a daily challenge to face the dark and the cold first thing in the morning.

As was his usual ritual, Nathan thanked the Lord for the day, committed it to God, prayed for Allie, his parents, Zach, Peter and Carol, and then it hit him, causing his heart to skip a beat… Elizabeth was here! His prayer took on an urgency, mixed with a dose of anxiety.

'Oh Lord, only you know what this day will bring. Please prepare my heart and mind and give me words for each moment. Guide Elizabeth and I through these unchartered waters. Help us avoid obstacles, yet be honest to face what we need to face together. I cannot tell her yet, but seeing her yesterday awakened my love for her, in spite of the difficult words we exchanged. Thank you for her honest confessions and that vow…? It was a promise I want to believe, a promise I want to see her prove to me is real, a promise I want to hold onto.'

'Bless her today as she spends time with her mother and Carol, and then with Allie. Have your way in their renewed relationship, and guard Allie's tender heart. May she be careful, yet forgiving. And guide Lisbeth with Allie. May she be sensitive to Allie at all times, so they only move forward, albeit slowly. Help mature Allie as you have been doing these past months. I am amazed! May the time working in the kitchen be specia…' Suddenly, Nathan realized Elizabeth had not taken stock of their pantry or icebox. He would have to drop off a house key for her to use while Allie and he were at school. That thought made Nathan rise quickly with a hint of excitement.

Nathan shivered as his feet hit the cold floor and, in the darkness, he moved his feet to find his slippers. Grabbing his robe, he shuffled out to turn on a light, begin a small fire, then start some coffee to percolate while he quickly took care of shaving and dressing. Realizing Elizabeth would be in the house, he took extra care that his bed was made neatly, his dresser was arranged and his serge laid out on the bed, ready for after breakfast. He threw on a sweater over his Henley until the house warmed sufficiently, then returned to the kitchen.

Washing the dishes from the previous evening, Nathan surveyed the room. It was neat, clean and simply furnished with the only decorations being the decorative key to Hope Valley that hung between the two back windows and Colleen's paintings of a bowl of fruit that hung over the small table. Heavy white homespun curtains hung on either side of the windows, tied back with navy blue ribbons. He straightened Allie's recipe book on the counter and decided to get out the dishes and ingredients for breakfast porridge, then grabbed his mug of hot coffee and returned to the front room.

As he sat on the sofa, Nathan remembered Elizabeth's visit, amazed at her beauty. She had been seated near the glow of the fire, with the firelight making her eyes sparkle and shine. Reliving some of their conversation, Nathan startled. Elizabeth had handed him an envelope and requested he read it later last night. Quickly setting his coffee on the table Nathan retrieved the small envelope and turned it in his hand. On the back flap was a numeral one. Maybe that meant more would be coming? Before pulling out the pages, he closed his eyes and prayed for God's will to be done. Opening the pages, Nathan began to read.

'Dear Nathan,

I am writing this while in Hope Valley with every intention of hand-delivering this to you soon. I am anticipating seeing you with joy, and some trepidation, but I am learning to trust and turn everything over to God for his will to be done.

Throughout these months of counseling and recovery I have been given many assignments to work through. That meant journaling, pondering and praying. Now, I am not certain whether some thoughts were God-given directly to me or through the Pastor or Doctor, but this is one I have felt compelled to face: What I did that I shouldn't have done and what I didn't do that I should have done.

I have written many of the answers to those questions in my previous missive (Sorry it was so lengthy!) but need to add a few things now.

I should not have ignored your pain as you shared the loss of your sister and Allie's mother. We were discussing Allie and the subject of loss was close to my heart, yet I shouldn't have stopped our conversation from including your experience. I should have asked and listened to you talk about you. Also, I admired your willingness to take on the responsibility of raising Allie, but should have told you that in words. I am sorry I never have done so.

At our first after-school conference on helping Allie, I shouldn't have mentioned the need for children to have stability. You turned to leave and I can only assume you had heard that before? In light of recent events and how I selfishly ignored my own son, I was hypocritical to make it seem as though you were not providing that to the best of your ability. Your job has many uncertainties but I could see that you were Allie's dependable rock and safe shelter and that you directed her to find God as her rock and shelter as well. Her prayers were always earnest and trusting and her childlike faith was convicting to me as an adult, to be honest. I should have told you these things and supported the good parenting you were doing over those many years. (Far longer than I have done.) You can be proud of Allie, Nathan. You are a wonderful father.

I wish I could take it back, but to do so would mean I would have to relive these past years and that is an unbearable thought. So, let me admit that I shouldn't have spoken of you so freely with others, mostly with Rosemary and then some with Lucas. In my youthful excitement to be falling in love with Jack, I acted like a giggling teenager confiding everything to my sisters and to Rosemary. As our relationship progressed and Jack was away so much, there was less to tell, but it was only as we married and he died that I stopped sharing so much. Still, I didn't learn my lesson and discussed way too much about you. I realize now I didn't share much about Lucas with Rosemary because we didn't know each other very well. Our conversations were superficial compared with you. I was not drawn to Lucas. That should have been a wakeup call, but in my blindness I ignored that! Wow.

I should have kept my own counsel. Rosemary never shared conversations or intimate details of her relationship with Lee and I should have recognized the importance of that within every friendship. I gossiped too much and that caused me to negate the importance of one relationship over another. I hope you understand what I mean? If you do not, please let's discuss it?

Looking back, I see that I used you too, Nathan. I used you as though you were there just for me. I didn't offer a reciprocal friendship to you. I barraged you (for there is no other word to describe how I hit you with my torrents of words) with my opinions and thoughts, then left. Maybe I could say I vented to you? Yet, in your gentlemanly manner, you just took it blow-by-blow. Had I acted like that to Lucas he wouldn't have given me the time of day. That is another revelation…

I know I shouldn't have ignored your kindnesses, your service, your protection or your attentiveness to Jack and me. You were always there for me yet I wasn't for you. I should have done this long ago, but let me say now how grateful I am for your rescue in the Saloon and for finding us in the wind storm. Both times, and maybe more of which I am unaware, you put yourself at risk for me. Thank you, Nathan. Also, I remember you ran in to the Library when the bookcase collapsed, worried for my safety. I have been blessed to have you in my life.

I have more to write, but will end this now as these admissions are foundational to how I mistreated you over these past years. It is too late to go back, so I apologize and ask for your forgiveness once again?

It is my hope and prayer that we can begin anew, to establish a friendship that includes both of our lives, sharing both of our thoughts and opening our hearts to each other. For I believe God has a plan for us, Nathan. I am trusting Him every day and holding on to Proverbs three verses five and six.

Thank you for all you done for me, not the least of which is reading this letter!
With my hope and my prayers,
Elizabeth'

Still holding the pages in his hand, Nathan looked into the dancing flames in the fireplace. With a combination of thoughts and prayers, Nathan whispered softly. 'Elizabeth is speaking freely about her faith. I never saw or heard that from her before, so thank you, Lord.' He re-read her acknowledgements about raising Allie and how Nathan was both Allie's safe place and he was instructing her well in her faith in God. 'Thank you, Lord, for that too. The woman that Allie is becoming is because of you, Lord. But, thank you for guiding me in my part of that.'

'I am so sorry that it has taken so long for Elizabeth to recognize the need for privacy and boundaries around relationships, but if this is true, that goes a long way in me trusting her. Help me to see examples of that, so I know it is true? Indeed that is an enormous realization and I am actually relieved to hear that she was aware of the differences between Lucas and me in how we treated her.'

He read further down. Knowing that the job of a Mountie was rarely recognized, Nathan was grateful that Elizabeth saw his watchfulness as a positive in her life. 'This is so different from her attitude when she found out I was in Hope Valley to protect her and Jack. There is no anger in these words.' Nathan read her hopes. 'I join her, Lord, in praying for a relationship where we both give to the other. Actually, that we each would give one-hundred-percent to each other. That is what is required of a marriage and, Lord? Between us right now, I do hope that is your plan? I ask for that once we have established a deep and abiding friendship.'

Nathan heard Allie go into the bathroom and he looked up at the clock. Folding the letter, he rose and placed it in his journal on his desk. He didn't want to carry it on his person, for fear of losing it. Patting the journal cover, Nathan whispered his final prayer for the moment. "Heavenly Father, your will be done in us, in earth as it is in heaven. Amen."

Nathan went to the kitchen to prepare breakfast. It was time to get ready for the day.

"Dad? Anything special you want to suggest for Mrs. Thornton and me to make for dinner?"

"Yeah. We have those pork chops we should use. I have to give her the house key, so can suggest that this morning. Would you mind making a cake or some type of dessert we can have for a couple days? We will probably join Gramma Carol and Grampa Pete for a meal this week and maybe go out over the weekend after your visit to the Home for the Aged. Does that sound good? Oh, and maybe you could bake cookies with Mrs. Thornton for that visit?" Nathan and Allie were finishing their porridge as they planned for the week ahead.

Allie was already reaching for a scone and cutting it open to make her favorite sandwich, butter on one half and jam on the other. "Dad? Are you okay with Mrs. Thornton being here?"

"You mean in the house? Sure. I have no problem with that." Nathan chuckled. "It's clean!"

"No, I didn't mean that. I mean visiting us here in Regina?"

"Well, I have to admit it was a shock. But after we talked for a while, I felt comfortable with her presence. We have a long way to go, but we are beginning again." Nathan prepared his scone and looked up at Allie. "How do you feel about her being here?"

"I was probably as shocked as you were, but it feels so good to see her and talk again. I really have missed her. I'm just a little nervous about you, Dad. I don't want to see you get hurt again."

"You don't have to worry, Honey. I intend to take things slowly and step-by-step. If God has a plan for us we are not in any hurry. We'll pray for God's will every day, eh?"

"Okay." Assured her dad seemed alright, Allie nodded. "Shall I bake brownies for tonight?"

"I will not say no to that, but maybe ask Mrs. Thornton if she likes brownies before you bake them? We want to offer something she will like!"

Allie stood at the car door watching as her father knocked on the back door of the Collins's home.

"Oh! Nathan! Good morning. Elizabeth? Nathan is here." Carol pulled him inside the entryway.

Coming from the dining room, Elizabeth's eyes went wide. Nathan had a different overcoat and hat and she could see he wore a dark blue uniform. "Oh!" She exclaimed as she placed her hand on her heart. "My goodness, Staff Sergeant Major! You look so different… but so handsome!"

Glancing down, Nathan realized she hadn't seen him in his blue serge and forager cap. He removed his cap and coughed as his cheeks reddened with her praise. "Ah, Good morning, Lisbeth. I brought you our house key! We never surveyed the pantry or icebox, so you may need to do that. We do have pork shops to use, so that is a starting point, okay? You may keep this key for the week, just in case you need to get in when we aren't home." He extended his hand with the key, tied with a blue ribbon. Again, the brush of her fingertips in his palm, sent a spark into his hand. Raising his eyes to meet hers, he quickly admitted. "Ah, we need to get to school, so I'll see you later, okay?"

"Oh yes. I am looking forward to it! See you later, Nathan." Elizabeth moved towards the door to close it and silently watched as Nathan opened the door for Allie then circled the vehicle. She lifted her hand to wave to them both, grateful they had both waved back. Well, Allie waved. Nathan gave her his hat-tip salute. Elizabeth caught her breath, smiling.

Interrupting the kitchen clean-up from breakfast, Carol answered the ringing telephone. "Hello? Collins residence."

"Aunt Carol! It's Claire. How are you today?"

"Well hello, Sweetheart! I am well, thank you. And you?"

"Well, though cold. Be prepared with an extra layer if you venture out today! Winter is here, I think! Listen, I am calling to invite you to attend Allie's Grant's concert on Friday evening with Dan and me. The other ladies will be going early, so we have room to drive you and save you the walk from your car to the entrance, especially in this cold weather. Shall we pick you up?"

"That sounds lovely, Claire. Just let me ask Nathan his plans?" Carol explained. "We have house guests who will most likely be attending and I need to know if everyone will be taken care of."

"Oh? Who is visiting this time, Auntie?" Claire laughed. "You have been operating an Inn this autumn!"

"It's Grace Thatcher and her daughter, Elizabeth Thornton. You know the woman who was Allie's teacher back in Hope Valley?"

"Elizabeth Thatcher, I mean Thornton?" Claire inhaled quickly. "Allie's teacher is here?"

"Yes, you'll have to meet her. Actually, at breakfast she mentioned that Allie would like to give her a tour of the Academy. Do you think that could be arranged? Should Nathan call the school office?"

Distracted, Claire took a moment to respond. "Ah. Yes, just call the office and they'll suggest a good time for that. Wow. Was this a planned visit?"

"No!" Carol laughed. "Your uncle and I knew a few days in advance, but it was a surprise to Nathan and Allie! I think a pleasant one though."

"Uh Hhh. Well I better get to class. Please call me when you know about Friday? I love you, Aunt Carol."

"I will. Love you too, Sweetheart."

As Claire Collins walked from the school office to her classroom, she pondered this news. 'I will have to find a way to deliver those journal pages to this woman, this Elizabeth. But what about Ardis? She just had a dinner date with Nathan and now this woman has shown up? Should I mention something to Ardis to forewarn her? But how can I even do that without revealing that this woman loves Nathan Grant and reveal the journal pages exist, and are in my possession?'

Entering her classroom, Claire set her thoughts aside to begin the school day. As she straightened her stack of notebooks and opened to the attendance list, Claire listened carefully as Allie Grant excitedly shared with her friends about her former teacher surprising her father and her for a visit.

"And she will be here for ten days, so that means we can spend a lot of time together!" Allie grinned, shifting eagerly in her chair. "She can come to our chorus concert and we can cook together and make cookies too! I hope you all can meet her. Mrs. Thornton is so beautiful."

"Ahem. Class let's come to order and I will pass the attendance list for you to sign? Thank you. Would anyone like to volunteer to read the Bible passage this morning and someone else to lead our morning prayer?"

"Okay. Sally? The reading. Allie? The prayer. Good. The passage for this morning is from the twelfth chapter of Romans. Sally? Verse three, and verses nine through sixteen." Miss Collins handed a book-marked Bible to Sally.

"'For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God has dealt to every man the measure of faith.' And verses nine and following. 'Let love be without dissimulation. Abhor that which is evil; cleave to that which is good. Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honour preferring one another; Not slothful in business; fervent in spirit; serving the Lord; Rejoicing in hope; patient in tribulation; continuing instant in prayer; Distributing to the necessity of saints; given to hospitality.'" (*28)

"Thank you, Sally. Now Allie?"

"Let us pray," spoke Allie as she stood beside her desk and closed her eyes. "Dear God, thank you for this day, for this school, for our teachers and friends. But most of all today, I want to thank you for family. Thank you for the ones who show us what it means not to think highly of himself, but to put others first. Thank you for those who show us what love is and how to serve, to be honorable, hopeful, patient and prayerful. Help all of us to be that way today. We pray in your Holy Name, Amen."

Claire Collins wiped a tear from the corner of her eye. How could she ever want anything but God's best for dear Allie Grant and her father? Aloud she thanked Allie and invited the students to open to page two hundred and three in their literature book.

Wes Murphy entered his office to find Nathan engrossed in reading. "Hey, Nathan!"

"Oh, good morning, Wes." Motioning to a precariously balanced mug on Wes's desk, Nathan explained. "I don't know if it's still hot or not, but I tried to use my coaster as a cover for your coffee. It might have kept some of the heat in!"

"Oh, that's great." Wes gingerly removed the coaster to reveal the steaming brew. "Look at that. Hot enough to burn my tongue." He took a careful sip. "We should do this all the time! Say, guess what?"

Nathan looked up, giving Wes his full attention.

"Thom just corralled me into his office. He has offered me the position of on-call Chaplain! How about that?"

"I think that is wonderful, Wes. Are you going to take it?" Nathan inquired. "For what it's worth, I think you would fit well in that capacity."

"I am inclined to take it, but want to mull it over and pray for a couple days first." Wes took another sip. "What's the smile for? Oh! How was the dinner and concert date?"

"Oh, that? Very nice. All three of us enjoyed the meal and the music. It was lovely." Nathan looked down as warmth crept up his neck. Lifting his face to look at Wes again, he chuckled. "Guess what?"

"What? You fell in love?"

"Uh, close, but not with Allie's Art teacher. Elizabeth Thatcher Thornton is here in Regina. She has come to visit Allie and me!"

"Wait! The teacher from Hope Valley? The one who loves you and who William Thatcher says you love? That woman?"

"That's the one. Out of the blue too. She and her mother are in town and staying with Peter and Carol! Can you believe this?" Nathan shook his head, still amazed.

"Not sure I can! Will you be bringing her to Depot for a tour? Will I get to meet this special lady?"

"Haven't really thought about that, but if you attend the St. Anne's and Boy's Academy concert on Friday evening, you will at least see her then." Nathan grinned.

"Well, I'll be!" Wes shook his head. "You look happy, Nathan. How is she after her collapse?"

"Her recovery is amazing and definitely proof of God at work. I see her as more mature, deeper, more at peace. It is beautiful to see." Nathan chuckled and spoke low. "She is beautiful."

"Ah, ha." Wes watched Nathan over the rim of his coffee mug. "How can I be praying for you, my friend?"

Looking out the window, Nathan responded quietly. "For God to guide our conversations, to help us face the hard parts with forgiving hearts and for God's will to be done. Oh, and for God to protect Allie's heart as well. Thank you."

"I can certainly do that, my friend."

Once the breakfast dishes had been washed and dried, Elizabeth excused herself to go to the Cottage to assess the food supplies. Holding her breath, she slowly opened the door and stepped inside. Inhaling, the lingering fragrance of coffee greeted her and she made her way to the kitchen. Elizabeth noted everything was clean, organized, and seemed to have its' place on the counter, open shelves and Hoosier cabinet. She doubted most men would be this organized, but realized it was probably part of Nathan's Mountie training, plus Allie was always neat as well.

Elizabeth opened the icebox, found the pork chops and for a moment was surprised to find three thick-cut chops. She would ask about that! Why three? Folding up the paper, she returned them to the shelf, and rummaging around found butter, eggs and celery stalks. Opening various cabinet doors, Elizabeth took note of cinnamon, pepper, and a loaf of bread that was slightly crusty. On the table below a lovely painting of yellow and green pears, and red apples in a blue ceramic bowl, was that exact bowl filled with the same fruit. Perfect! Stuffed pork chops and cinnamon apples for dinner! Pausing to look around again, Elizabeth leaned on the sink and searched the view of the yard behind the building, then remembered to check the flour and sugar canisters. The kitchen was well-stocked and if they could use some of the jars of canned vegetables on the shelf they wouldn't have to shop for any extra foods for tonight's meal.

Tempted to peek into the bedrooms, Elizabeth resisted and decided she would ask Allie to give her the tour about which Elizabeth's father had reported. It would be worth waiting for!

Walking to the mantelpiece, Elizabeth examined some photographs. One drew her attention more than the others. Well, two actually. There was an older and very striking woman who was photographed standing behind a seated Archie Grant with her hands resting on his shoulders. This must be Nathan's mother and it looked recent because Archie looked very much as he had when he visited Hope Valley. Nathan's parents must be reconciled!

It was the next photograph that amazed Elizabeth though. Although a sepia toned photograph, you could see that Nathan's serge was darker that the serge of the young man standing beside him.

'Except for a small difference in height, Nathan and this younger man looked like twins! They were undoubtedly related, but how?' Elizabeth thought Nathan had only mentioned his deceased sister. Maybe she had missed more than she thought. Elizabeth lightly traced the back of her finger over Nathan's image, letting out a deep sigh. That would be another getting-to-know-you question for tonight.

Returning to the main house, Elizabeth entered to find an older couple chatting with her mother in the hallway.

"Elizabeth, Honey, come meet Irma and Jake Cook. Irma? Jake? My daughter, Mrs. Elizabeth Thornton." Grace made the introductions then explained that Jake would be glad to take them to the grocery store if they needed anything. "I explained that David would be coming for us at ten o'clock and would give us his tour of Regina! We can stop for supplies if we need to do so." Grace turned to the Cook's. "Thank you though for your kind offer!"

(*28) Romans 12:3, 9-13, King James Version, Public Domain

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