Authors Notes: A Tykai fic I first started writing sometime last year. Contains an angsty/suicidal Kai.

Disclaimer: I do not own Beyblade.

My only Reason

Chapter 1: To Escape the Emptiness

The blue haired young man let out a soft sigh as he sat at his desk placing his signature on what seemed like an endless amount of paper that meant perfectly nothing to him. Now sixteen, he had inherited his family's business – or rather his Grandfathers. He was a hard worker and made the company large sums of money each day. But he didn't care. In fact he didn't want anything to do with running the Company whatsoever. The only reason he had accepted the task was because he had nothing better to do.

After the world championships he had given up on Beyblading. Beyblading had been the entire basis of his life since he was small child, his reason for being alive. Now that he had abandoned it, what else was there to do? Without Beyblading he had nothing; no important task to complete, no ultimate goal to strive towards. Really running the company was his only purpose and even then he wasn't particularly needed for that seeing that if anything was ever to happen to him he could easily be replaced.

Once again he sighed wishing that the documents in front of him would miraculously take care of themselves allowing him to leave and return home. Although why he wanted to go he wasn't sure as at home he did nothing with the exception of reading and even that had lost its appeal. Basically he was trapped in a vicious cycle of working six days a week, having one day off then back to work for six days straight with no real will or desire to escape.

Suddenly he was awoken from his thoughts by the beep of his intercom.

"What is it?" He asked, monotonously.

"Sorry to interrupt you sir, but there is a Mr. Granger on the line." stated a female voice on the other end. "Shall I tell him you are busy?"

Kai blinked in surprise. Tyson? Why would his ex-team mate be calling him? "No put him through."

"Yes sir."

Kai picked up the phone and was greeted by a loud cheerful voice. "Heya Kai! How are ya?"

He remained silent for a moment, allowing the familiar voice to register in his mind. "Tyson, it's been a long time."

"Yep, that's why I'm calling. I'm having a get together with the others and it'd be great if you'd come," He gave small laugh. "The Blade breakers reunited!"

Kai bit his lip. "Um I don't know if…"

"Aw come on! It's this weekend at mines. Please come, Kai!" pleaded the boy on the other line.

"This weekend? Sorry I don't think I can make it, I have a lot of work to do and…"

"You said that last time!" cried Tyson interrupting him.

He frowned. It was true. However he did have his reasons.

"Come on, the others and I haven't seen you for ages!"

"I know and I'm sorry, but running a company requires a great amount of time and I have a mountain worth of work to do." he replied trying to sound as apologetic as possible.

"Couldn't you get someone to cover for you? I mean how many guys do you have working there?"

He frowned. "This is something… only I can deal with."

He heard Tyson sigh on the other line. "Yeah sure. Well if you change your mind…"

"Yeah… Well I better get back to work." he replied, feeling slightly guilty.

"Oh. Okay. Well it was nice talking to you," said the other boy sounding quite disappointed. "Ja ne."

"Bye."

He placed down the phone and continued his exciting task of reading over and writing his name on the many documents.

He felt annoyed that Tyson had called him. Why had he wanted him to come? If they wanted to relive their old glory days as a team they could easily do it without him. After all it wasn't like he was a loud and happy person who talked about things long past with great enthusiasm. It wasn't like they missed him. Wasn't like Tyson missed him…

His team-mates were something of the past and like most things they meant nothing to him. Didn't they? He let out a small moan, feeling a headache coming on.

Damnit, I really don't want to deal with this right now. I don't even care what's written on these pieces of crap. I'm just going to sign all of them and get the hell out of here as fast as I can.

By the time he returned home, his headache had increased making him curse this wretched day.

"Sir your dinner is ready. Shall I have someone serve it to you now?" asked one of the butlers as he took his master's coat.

"No I'm not hungry. I'm going to retire to my chambers for the night. Inform me if anything comes up." he said making his way up the staircase.

"Of course, Sir."

He knew starving himself wouldn't do his head any good and that he should take some aspirin to dim the pain, but at that moment he wanted nothing more than to retreat to his room and escape from the world.

Kai let himself fall back on the bed, and groaned. He stared helplessly at the ceiling while many a thoughts rushed through his mind. He had no idea where all these thoughts had came from in the slightest. He had once been so good at clearing his mind, not thinking of anything, spending the majority of his time perfecting his Beyblading skills.

Slowly he pulled himself up right and walked over to the drawer chest across the other side of the room. He opened the drawer and rummaged through it until he came across what he was looking for – a photograph of himself with his team-mates. It felt so long since then. Tyson had been right. It had been along while since they had all been together. He had no intention of seeing them again however. Beyblading was a thing of the past. He no longer needed them and they sure as hell didn't need him. But still, now that he had given up Beyblading he felt something missing. What it had been he did not know. What he did know however was that it had once been there and now it was gone. But why should he care? He was empty. Always had been, always would be.

He snickered bitterly at himself. It bothered him that his life was so meaningless, yet he was supposedly empty. Stupidity. How the hell was that supposed to work. His company didn't matter to him. His ex-teammates didn't matter to him. Nothing matter. Really, what was the point in even living anymore? It wasn't even living. It was basically a case of going through each day with no real purpose until the day that he died. And being the healthy young man that he was, unless he died in some sort of accident it was likely to be a long time before his body decided to keel over, and waiting until that time wasn't something that particularly appealed to him. In fact only one thing appealed to him at the moment and time and the thought had only just entered him mind. Life was meaningless and he no longer wished to spend the rest of his days like this…

Yes! Why hadn't he ever thought of it before? He read about it all the time in the papers, and heard about it on the news all the time. Suicide – were a person willing took his or her own life. Granted a lot of the stories he read were sad, especially when friends and family of the person voiced out their grief over the death, but he of course had no one to miss him, no one to cry over his death. There was nothing to keep him in this world with perhaps the exception of his own emptiness, if that was even a reason at all.

For the first time in what seemed like years, Kai smiled. It was the perfect solution and why he hadn't thought of it sooner was beyond him. Sure he wasn't one of those depressed kids who seemed to be complete experts on the subject but he imagined taking ones life wouldn't prove too much difficulty. In fact the very thought enticed the detached young man.

Quickly he rushed to the bathroom within his chambers deciding that it was now or never. Calmly he searched through the cupboard till he came across the sharpest razorblade he could find. Satisfied with the one he had chosen, he took a deep breath and sat himself on the edge of the bathtub, slowly pulling up his left shirt sleeve to his elbow.

After sitting there for a few moments he found that it wasn't as easy as he had thought. He bit his lip, conflicting emotions rising within him. It was if something were holding him back. He stared down at his pale arm, tracing the small tinted lines of blue. Supposedly there was a correct way from slitting ones wrists. Which way it was of course he did not know. He would just force the blade deeply into his skin and hope for the best – the best being slicing opened an artery and bleeding himself to death.

Again he smiled as he picked up the blade, holding no fear. He disliked showing fear. He wouldn't fear death, he would embrace it. He placed the blade gently against his arm and slid it across his skin. He leaned back, his breathing deepening. So maybe being completely unafraid had been a lie… When he looked back down his eyes widened at how deep a gash he had made. He was sure he hadn't he cut that hard. He dug it in again, this time harder and this time causing him pain. It looked down at the razor he was holding, its blade covered in blood. It sure was sharp…

He smiled, satisfied with his choice and watched as the liquid the same colour as his eyes leak out of his arm. He now grasped the blade quite tightly and slid it against his skin a lot more forcefully. He gave aloud gasp, his wrist stinging painfully. He tried to ignore the pain and focus on the fact that soon all the emptiness he felt would disappear.

His body slid down and he used the side of the bathtub to support his weight. He gave a small chuckle, his shirt and trousers now covered in blood. Guess that will leave a stain.

He had never realised how beautiful the crimson liquid was, never bothered to think about it yet it had been flowing through his veins all these years. He was surprised at just how much was leaking from his wounds, like a never-ending flowing river.

The light of the room started to dim quite a bit. It would all be over soon…

"Kai! Hey, Kai, are you here?" yelled a voice. His eyes shot open, instantly recognising who the voice belonged to.

There was a knock on the bathroom door. "Kai, are you in there? Your butler dude said you where in your room."

Fuck. What the hell was Tyson doing here! How the hell was he supposed to explain this to him? Maybe he could say he was having a bath, and Tyson would just go home. Or even if he did decide to wait, he would be dead before Tyson would see him and what he'd done.

He heard Tyson grab on the door knob and instantly panic swept over him. He hadn't locked the door!

"Kai, I'm coming in." Before he even got the chance to yell at him not to come in, the door had already been opened.

Just as Tyson was about to venture into the bathroom he stopped abruptly at the door way, horrified by the bloody sight he saw lying on the floor. "Ka-Kai?" he asked his voice quavering.

Shit! Shit! Shit! This wasn't supposed to happen. No one was supposed to find him until he was actually dead! Especially not Tyson!

T-Tyson, I…"

The other boy could barely utter a response, unable to believe what he was seeing. "Ka-Kai, wha-what happened?"

He opened his mouth to speak, but no sound came out. How could he possibly answer that question?

Tyson's eyes flickered to the small puddle of blood on the floor where the crimson soaked razor lay. "Kai… You-you didn't…" Kai started down at the floor, unable to look Tyson in the face.

Still not looking up he could hear Tyson staggering out of the bathroom. It seemed like he had scared the boy off. Did that mean he could die here alone like he wanted?

The answer was no; as Tyson came rushing straight back in. "Ha-hang on, Kai," He said, his voice trembling. "The ambulance will be here soon."

"Why the hell did you call an ambulance?" growled Kai, weakly.

"What are you talking about?"

"Why can't you just leave me here? Why can't you just let me die?"

The words struck Tyson hard, his eyes widening even more. How-how could he possibly be saying such a thing? His face screwed up and suddenly he erupted into tears, unable to comprehend what was going on. Kai remained silent, not knowing what to say. There was nothing he could say…

The navy hair boy was grasped on to the sink, trying to maintain his balance. He was sobbing heavily.

"Why… How can you say such thing? What could possibly be so horrible that you want to die?"

Kai still could bring himself to look at the boy, his eyes staring lifelessly at the ceiling. "Because there is no reason for me to continue on living."

"What? What the hell are you talking about! You have hundreds of reasons to live. What about your friends? What about me…?"

But there was no reply, the sliver haired boy already unconscious.

Authors Notes: I hope that was alright and not too bad. Any reviews or advice upon how I could improve my writing would be greatly appreciated. Arigato for reading!