Luke, I am your Mushroom

Disclaimer: I don't own Star Wars

A/N: Wow! 17 reviews for the last chappa! And thank you all for voting for Ani! Except for those who voted for Obi-Wan, because that doesn't make sense. I wasn't aware that was a choice, myself. The choices were only Ani is hott or Ani isn't hott. Anyway, on with chappa 4!

Chapter 4: This is Torture

"Luke…I am your mushroom," Anakin repeated in a Darth Vader accent.

"Okay…so you're my mushroom," Luke started, backing slowly into his house. "What the hell is that supposed to mean? That the next time I have stir-fry, I should throw you in it?"

"Aaargh! NO!" Anakin cried, throwing his hands up in the air in exasperation. "My shoe's untied! I never learned how to tie them as a child…" he sobbed.

Luke was filled with natural sympathy for Anakin, and bent down and tied Anakin's shoe for him.

"T-thank you…" Anakin sniffled. "On with what I was saying."

"Aaargh! NO!" Anakin cried, throwing his hands in the air like he don't care…okay no.

"Aaargh! NO!" Anakin cried, throwing his hands up in the air in exasperation. "I am your FATHER, you dimwit! I just got married to a mushroom, that's all!"

"I'm the kid of a mushroom?" Luke exclaimed. This was too weird. He'd always wondered who his parents were, but this?

"NO! Remember what I said, Luke…" Anakin used his cool Sith powers to insert this into Luke's mind:

(((((((((Flashback))))))))))

"Aye, it is true. 5 years ago, me was wedded to a fine lassie, a real looker. Coolianna, 'er name was…"

(((((((((End Flashback))))))))))

Luke gasped. "Who is my mother then! Where is she!" Then, realizing for the first time who his father looked like, he cried, "What have you done with her! You wouldn't…"

"No, I wouldn't. And I didn't." Anakin replied simply.

"Then where is she!" Luke demanded.

"Meh. Probably on the same planet I left her. Maybe creating an awesome clone army to destroy me. Who knows?"

"You didn't…hurt her?" Luke wondered.

"Uhm…no? Why would I do that?" Anakin answered, confused.

"Gee, I don't know…LOOK AT YOUSELF!" Luke then proceeded to take out a pink and lime green flowery mirror.

"Well I suppose that the scar over there could be a little frightening but other than that, really I don't look like I could…"

"Aaargh! Are you insane!" Luke cried, throwing his hands in the air like he don't care. And yes, this time I mean it.

"Yes and I do believe you are, too," Anakin stated this as if it were the most natural thing in the world to say. Which it is, if you're only joking. Which Anakin was most definitely not.

"Aaargh!" Luke cried.

A/N: I could have made that a lot longer, but I chose not to. Hope you all found that as humorous as the last chappas!

END OF CHAPPA POLL

For lack of a better topic…

Who's seen Star Wars Episode III: Return of the Sith?

I have! (grins)

REVIEW!

Caralynne—I do, yes. Like Ani, I mean. Thanks for noticing!

Utsuri—Glad you agree with me. And in my opinion, no pic of him is truly creepy. Oh, and the actor's name is actually Hayden Christensen, by the way.

ActChick13—You're going to get married and have 3 kids. Good luck with that, eh? Lol! Keep on reviewing!

Ladylina—I thought you were my cheese sandwich? Ookkaay…nice. And Obi-Wan wasn't one of the choices, but nice to hear your opinion anyway.

Tink664—Oui oui, I agree with you all the way. Keep reviewing, and I'll keep writing.

Naga—Really. And I did change my profile a bit, but I mean, I still like Beyblade so what's your point?

Kuyaga—He said what? Lol! No, really, what did he say…XS

BreathingFlames—Squee? Lol! I LOVE the Llama song! I've typed up the Llama song! Have you typed up the llama song? Lol! Keep reviewing!

Kate Van Helsing—Aliens with Gungan accents and little pink Native American powwow outfits are building advanced civilizations in our governments' brains? Lmao! Very nice review…

PentagonMerlin—Why, thank you! Keep reviewing! ;)

Dancing Pickle—Lmao, that was probably the bst review I've ever read. Keep reviewing so I can laugh my ass off some more! Lol!

Fuzzyone—Well, you were wrong! Me and all my friends know it well, too! Keep reviewing!

Barbossa'sApples—Yay! I'm so happy you got the, 'You're breaking my heart,' thing! And yeah I agree with your opinion 100, hands down!

Rachel 791—Yes, yes, and disturbing, oh yeah! Keep reviewing!

Duelwriter—Yes, Anakin's nick name is Ani. I like it, it's cute. And I torally agree with you (obviously) and I can also say ditto quite easily, lol!