Chapter 46
The Judgment of Joshua Graham
The day to follow the decrucifixion took a very long time to come to a conclusion.
Sandra was forced to explain everything to Joshua—all while urging him to hurry and escort Vulpes to safety—and with all this difficulty, somehow, she managed to convince her old friend to play along, and they requested the assistance of the Sorrows to transport all of them back to Joshua's home. Sandra, Vulpes, and even the horse she's left outside of the ravine—all of them were safely secure in Joshua's home encampment by the time the sun began to set over Zion, and now, Sandra was inside Joshua's quarters, the very same cave-like room where she'd first met him long ago.
Vulpes lay on a pelt spread out in a cozy nook in the cave wall, and Sandra remained by his side for a long while, raising his head and giving him sips from her canteen as often as she could. While she did—Joshua stood across the room from her, his arms crossed, leaning on the front of his desk and eyeing the two of them thoughtfully.
He'd gone silent for a long while after Sandra explained everything to him—and he remained so even now, still mulling over all the new information and finding much of it unbelievable. Yet still, perhaps out of loyalty or obligation, he made no move to torment Vulpes any further, or even to imprison him somewhere. He simply stood, allowing the courier to tend to him instead.
Sandra sighed, stroking along Vulpes's forehead before turning to Joshua.
"Did he even… try to tell you?" she wondered. "When he got here, did he…?"
"Well… no," Joshua mumbled, scratching along his bandaged cheek. "But he… didn't have the opportunity to. The moment he appeared in my sight, I recognized him right off… and I set out and captured him. He had no clue I was there… and he didn't have the chance to fight or speak. He was simply subdued… rendered unconscious… and taken for judgment."
Sandra stared at him, feeling somewhat stunned.
It was so very rare to encounter anyone who was capable of getting the jump on Vulpes Inculta. She'd forgotten just how formidable Joshua Graham truly was…
Joshua read her expression, giving her a coy squint. "I taught that boy much of what he knows, Courier. Even accounting for all the cruelty."
"He's not like that anymore," Sandra sighed, observing Vulpes again.
"Truly," Joshua murmured, studying her closely. "I find that very… very hard to believe."
"Well—it's true," Sandra stated. "I just told you everything—"
"I didn't say you were lying," Joshua cut her off. "I said it's hard to believe. It's rather difficult for anyone to believe that I'm not longer the Malpais Legate. And, yet, here I am. God works in mysterious ways."
"Well… then you should know," Sandra mumbled. "You should know what he's… going through. Hell, you should know better than anyone…"
"I do." Joshua's eyes ventured down to Vulpes. "But… my areas of expertise resided in the realms of power and wrath. His, however… resided in the areas of cunning and lies. I imagine it would be much harder to determine his true colors than it would be mine."
Sandra turned to him, her eyes sparkling as if she'd been challenged somehow.
She reached her feet, facing Joshua and inhaling deeply.
"Do you know why he came here?" she breathed.
Joshua folded his arms again, merely staring at her.
"I went to north Utah to take down a freak who likes terrorizing people—and I went there alone," Sandra explained. "Vulpes found out, and he decided to follow me up there. I've told him you were here—I've told him what you do to the frumentarii—and he still risked walking through Zion just to get to me. I think that, if nothing else, makes his true colors pretty damn clear now."
"Very much so," Joshua agreed, his tone lowering. "Yet still… very hard to believe."
"Why?" Sandra grumped. "Why's it hard to believe…?"
"You've never been a Legionnaire," Joshua told her seriously. "It takes a very, very long time for their steep and primal brainwashing to begin washing away with the tides… and very, very few Legionnaires are even granted that opportunity. To think that it's happened to someone else, other than me, is unbelievable enough… but to think it's happened to Vulpes Inculta sounds like the stuff of fairytales."
Sandra huffed out a breath, frustrated and at a loss.
Joshua sighed. "And, yet… here it is. Undeniable proof that someone other than Caesar has taken his priority. One might call it a fairytale… but I'd sooner call it a miracle. If it's true."
"Well… you'll know," Sandra murmured distantly, staring down at Vulpes again. "You'll know when I take over Vegas, and he's right there by my side when I do."
"I hope so… for your sake," Joshua uttered. "Being betrayed by the fox is probably the cruelest fate one might meet at the end of a Legionnaire's wrath."
"Yeah. It was." Sandra knelt beside Vulpes again, opening her vault 13 canteen. "Not anymore."
Joshua simply watched her, observing as she gently administered more water.
"If you've been with him all this time… since Caesar's passing," he muttered. "Have you… noticed any change?"
Sandra placed the canteen down and gave him a questioning look. "Whaddo you mean?"
"I mean… from the way he was when you first met him, compared to now," Joshua explained, nodding at Vulpes. "If his Legion ways truly are a thing of the past for him… then you would have noticed. His demeanor will change over time. His temper will change over time. And… more than anything, his priorities will. There are many things that come with the Legion… the fear of chems, the terror at the idea of becoming crippled or deemed useless… or, ever since my banishment… the fear of my very name. These fears are instilled in the Legionaries deeply, and if any of them break these rules, they're met with merciless punishment. He will avoid those things out of instinct, just based on the fear of Legion punishment. But… if he truly has drifted far from the Legion way… then you will have noticed him showing less and less fear for these things by now."
Sandra pondered on this for a moment.
"I don't know… most of that stuff doesn't really come up a whole lot," she said. "I know he doesn't like chems… but he doesn't hate them, either. He knows I have to give him a stimpack whenever he's hurt, and he doesn't mind me doing that anymore like he used to. But the rest of that stuff just… never came up."
Joshua slowly nodded, his gaze resting thoughtfully on Vulpes Inculta.
"I wonder if he could," he murmured curiously. "I wonder if he could speak my name…"
Sandra stared down at Vulpes as well, wondering the very same thing. She knew that all Legionaries were banned from speaking the true name of the burned man—and breaking this rule would land them on a cross.
Nowadays, Vulpes seemed fairly detached from the Legion ways of doing things—but she'd never outright asked him to say Joshua Graham's name before. She had no clue if that fear still resided in him or not.
"Northern Utah," Joshua murmured, squinting at her. "That's… rumored to be the runaway spot for the Demon of the West."
Sandra slowly turned toward him, meeting his eyes with intensity.
Joshua surveyed her stare, seeming to find the answer before he ever asked the question.
"You're going after him," he knew. "Why?"
Sandra let out a breath, inhaling and explaining even more of her and Vulpes's story thus far—this time, focusing solely on their experiences bounty hunting, her friendship with Steven Randall, and all the bad blood that existed between Randall and Marko. She told him of the Judge, Red Bear, Zimmer and Sergio—and when she finished, there was a heavy silence, Joshua staring at her and mulling deeply over his thoughts again.
Sandra returned her attention to Vulpes—but Joshua's remained on her.
"You swayed me from revenge," he said in a soft, severe voice. "But is that not what you're seeking now?"
"No… not really. Not me," Sandra mumbled. "Randall's after revenge. I'm just after… an… ending. A resolution."
"I see. And… you cannot obtain that while Marko lives and breathes," Joshua surmised. "Why is that? He isn't a player in the Mojave. It sounds to me like you've exterminated most of their crime lords now."
"He could become one… especially with all the friends he had there," Sandra grumbled darkly. "And I'm not taking that chance. He's gone. Everyone… everyone who keeps backing me into a fucking corner like this is gonna disappear. Any of them being alive means we're not safe. And…"
Her gaze landed on Vulpes once again.
"I'm not having that shit anymore," she growled.
"Ah. So… you're wiping the slate entirely clean," Joshua understood. "Starting with Caesar… and ending on the Demon of the West."
"Maybe. Unless Lanius wants a fight," Sandra mumbled. "Then he's gonna be the finisher… but I have a way of dealing with the whole Legion in one fell swoop, and I'm not talking about securitrons, either."
Joshua examined her.
Sandra faced him. "I met Ulysses. And… he has a way to wipe them off the map. All of them."
Joshua continued to stare, appearing to be deep in thought.
"Something's changed inside you," he observed.
"Yeah. Well… yeah," Sandra sighed, turning back to Vulpes and wiping a spot of sweat from his brow. "I talked him down from using it… but… I don't know. The longer this all goes on… the more I think we're gonna have to use it. The Legion are gonna come at us in droves eventually… and I could just… bomb them… all off the face of the earth."
Joshua leaned on the desk, eyeing her. "What you're referring to now is genocide."
Sandra kept her focus on Vulpes without replying.
"Genocide… of Legion, of Legion slaves, of Legion wives, of Legion children," Joshua continued. "And of all possible defectors of the Legion as well… people like me. And people like that man before you."
Sandra gazed into Vulpes almost trancelike, her mind a million miles away.
"That's why I didn't do it the first time," she exhaled.
"Then why," Joshua asked. "Why consider doing it now?"
Sandra let out a disdainful cloud of breath. "Because it's… the only sure way."
Joshua was silent for nearly a full minute. Then, he straightened up and prepared to leave the room—but first, he moved closer to her, bending down and placing a hand on her shoulder before speaking softly into her ear.
"Even our Lord in Heaven regretted committing genocide," he told her intensely. "How do you think you would carry the weight of that burden thereafter?"
He patted her shoulder once, then turned and ventured out of the room.
Sandra sat on her knees alone, stroking along Vulpes's hand and wearing a deadpan visage.
She'd never run this idea by her friends before, and Joshua Graham was the first person she'd told about it. She knew Arcade and Niner would hate the idea—and even Vulpes wouldn't like it—but, in all her time alone these past three months, the realization slowly came to her.
Trying to do everything the right way may not accomplish their goal at the end.
And if they didn't accomplish that goal—then the Mojave would fall into chaos at the hands of the Legion, and the entire project of cleaning up the region for the future and securing a safe home for herself and her friends would have all been for absolutely nothing.
Exterminating all enemies of the Mojave was the only sure way.
She wasn't sure if she wanted to use Ulysses's method or not—but as of now, it didn't yet matter. For the time being, she simply had to focus on bringing down Marko—and on mending Vulpes back to health.
As her thoughts wandered back to Vulpes, she found herself lost in him, noting his every feature as her chest began to ache.
Joshua had informed her that Vulpes was on the cross for three and a half days with no food or water, and being left to starve and dehydrate in the sun for so long had landed him in this comatose sleep. She'd been forcing water into him since she first arrived here—but he hadn't yet stirred, and the longer she waited, the more she felt that deep knot of anxiety squirming and festering restlessly in the pit of her stomach.
A soft rhythm of footsteps caught her ear, and Sandra turned, seeing Follows-Chalk entering the room from the other side. He was carrying a folded suit, a hat to match, a displacer glove, and a plate of food.
"Joshua… told me to give you this," he said, approaching her and placing the items on the ground beside her. "Squirrel bits… tender and seasoned how you like."
Sandra tried to smile. "Thank you. I'm surprised you remember."
Follows-Chalk let out a laugh. "I'm surprised you're here."
Sandra's smile faded. "I'm sorry… if I came off kinda crazy…"
"No… I understand now," Follows-Chalk replied, swatting the air. "It's okay. And Joshua says you can rest here for as long as you like, so… if you need anything, I'm down below."
"Thanks," Sandra said with a wave.
Just when he turned to leave, she called out to him again.
"Chalk—I thought you were going out to see civilization?"
Follows-Chalk paused at the exit, turning and giving her a half-smile. "I did. Turns out civilization isn't so civilized."
Sandra paused, then laughed, nodding in agreement. "Ye'ap, okay, got me there…"
Follows-Chalk chuckled and walked out of the room.
Sandra faced Vulpes again, staring at him for a while longer.
And then—he slightly turned his head, releasing the faintest hint of a groan.
Sandra's brows raised, and she hunched closer, hovering over him and flashing a smirk.
"Hey," she said, gingerly cupping his cheek and leaning steadily nearer.
His eyes barely made a flutter, then began to ease open, gazing into her in a daze, looking both lost and fatigued.
"Are you here…?" he breathed in a wispy, weakened rasp.
"Yeah… I'm here," Sandra smiled, feeling rushed with joy and relief, her thumb softly stroking along his face. "I'm really here."
Vulpes felt her, lost in her eyes, his expression strangely devoid of its usual hard severity—now simply at ease, exhausted, yet relieved, his eyes drifting shut as he let out a deep, sated breath. He remained there, quietly lying atop the pelt and simply savoring her touch for as long as time would allow.
"Lashed… to a cross," he rasped in a dying whisper. "I s… suppose I… had that coming…"
Sandra gently lay beside him, nestled into his side and lying on his shoulder, her arm outstretched over him, still warmly stroking his cheek.
Vulpes released a heavy exhalation. "Retribution…"
Sandra stared into him, her heart aching for him and her expression painted with empathy.
"I can't believe you," she murmured. "Freaking lunatic… I can't believe you'd come here…"
"Had to," Vulpes breathed softly.
"No you didn't," Sandra replied with a pained little laugh, a tear crawling down her face. "No… you really didn't…"
Vulpes's eyes stayed closed, and he let out another heavy breath, his arm beginning to move, sliding up and grabbing ahold of hers—his hand tightening firmly around her wrist, remaining there.
"Yes," he exhaled. "I really did."
Sandra nearly choked, swallowing a sob and smiling, snuggling even closer.
And—around the corner, in the darkness, the pathway leading into Joshua's sleeping area—Joshua stood there, arms folded, back against the cave wall, and listening to the two of them from the shadows, making a thoughtful expression beneath his bandages as he did.
"Foxxy," Sandra uttered, her voice lighter than ever now. "Lis… listen… I'm not… ever gonna leave you again. Okay…?"
Vulpes's eyes drifted open again, his head rolling to the side, his gaze meeting hers.
"You scared me," Sandra breathed, shaking her head and fighting back more tears, burying her face in his shoulder. "Fuck, you scared me…"
Vulpes continued to stare at her, tired, dazed, and looking more softened and genuine than he probably ever had before.
"Y'know, the whole… the whole point was… to just deal with this shit so you'd be safe now," Sandra croaked into him, sniffing and waging a war with her emotions, three months' worth of them trying to flood out all at once. "And it just… fucking did the opposite somehow…"
Vulpes merely observed her, his visage calm and serene, perhaps even empathetic now.
"Well, we can't… do this anymore," Sandra resolved, raising her head and meeting his eyes again, hers fiery with determination behind watery lenses. "Neither one of us can pull any crazy lone-wolf BS anymore. Okay?"
Vulpes kept on staring, his eyes venturing across every inch of her face, landing on her head.
"You look different," he exhaled. "Your hair is… what did you do to it…?"
Sandra scoffed out a choking sort of laugh. "Seriously? Did you not listen to a single word I—?"
"Sandra," Vulpes said, his dry rasp seeming to strengthen, as well as his hold on her. "I never planned to go it alone. Never."
Sandra took slightly back, her heart palpitating. The sound of her name on his tongue always felt surprising somehow, though now, it felt strangely inviting, warm and almost loving in a way.
"I know," she uttered in a trembling whisper. "I know, it… it was my fault, just… you just can't do stuff like this anymore. You can't walk straight into a place that crucifies frumentarii. Don't do that."
Vulpes managed to crack a smirk.
"It's not funny," Sandra croaked with a broken laugh, another tear running down her cheek, and she shook her head at him. "You're crazy…"
Vulpes released a few mild chuckles, his other arm sliding beneath her and wrapping snugly around her.
"Then we're a match," he determined.
The two simply held one another for a moment—and then, Vulpes's eyes opened again, and he glanced to the side, staring past her and examining the cave-like room around him, only just realizing that the two of them were most assuredly still in Zion.
"Graham," Vulpes mumbled. "Where is he now…?"
Sandra blinked, slowly pushing herself up and meeting his eyes again, thinking she might've misheard him.
"What…?" she exhaled.
Joshua—still standing around the corner in the darkness—also perked up the slightest bit, his eyes narrowing with intrigue.
Vulpes slowly began to sit upright alongside her, grasping his head for a moment and waiting for the brief lightheadedness to pass him by. Then, he faced her and spoke again.
"Where is Joshua Graham?" Vulpes asked her.
Sandra stared at him, grinning and letting out a laugh.
It seemed he had no fear of the burned man's name at all anymore.
Joshua unfolded his arms, resting his head back to the cave wall and releasing a long, definitive breath, gazing up at nothing in particular. After a moment, he gave himself a nod, judging Vulpes's situation to be—just as the courier said—truly a repeat of his own.
Thus, Joshua straightened up and turned, retreating into his sleeping area for the evening and leaving his two guests alone.
"He's here," Sandra told Vulpes. "And… he knows the whole story now."
Then, she gently nudged him down, urging him to return to his lying position before scooting the plate of food closer. The two of them ate squirrel bits one by one, cuddled close together until Sandra's exhaustion finally began to catch up with her, and they both drifted off to sleep, curled closely to one another throughout the entirety of the night.
The next day—a warm, sunny day in Zion—Sandra and Vulpes prepared for their leave.
Vulpes dressed in his suit, hat, and displacer glove, still feeling somewhat dazed, but fairly well recovered compared to the day before. He and Sandra strolled out of the caves, stopping by the water's edge and giving Joshua their final goodbyes before their departure.
"I truly hope you stay the course you're on," Joshua told Vulpes intensely. "The peace obtained at the end is well worth it."
Vulpes managed a nod, thinking of nothing to say in response.
"And you," Joshua added, facing Sandra and releasing a solemn sigh. "I just hope you stay on a course you won't lose yourself on. Do not seek out Courier Six again unless all your other options fall through."
"That's the plan," Sandra told him, waving him off. "Seeya, Joshua."
"Goodbye."
At that—Sandra and Vulpes strolled off, marching down the water's edge and following the river far away from the camp.
The two walked in silence for a long while, and they eventually arrived alongside the main body of the river, wading across the shallow waters and approaching the vast clearing on the other side, where Sandra's animal resided. The horse was in the general area, having wandered up and down the river a few times, and it appeared to be eating a mouthful of long dry grass that it had pulled from behind a nearby boulder.
Sandra sauntered over to the horse and strapped her bag onto its saddle, then turned to Vulpes, laughing at the bizarre look on his face. He was staring at the animal as if it was an alien species.
"What in God's name is that?" Vulpes uttered, narrowing his eyes at it in befuddlement.
"No idea," Sandra smirked, patting the horse's side. "I call it Long-Face."
"Is it a mutant?"
"Iunno, maybe. I've seen pictures of it on the mountains around the Dead Horses campsites, though. I forgot to ask them about it…"
"Horses," Vulpes mumbled. "This must be the animal they're named after. It's a horse."
Sandra blinked, turning to the horse and surveying it. "Huh. Well—I'm still gonna call it Long-Face. Least until I take it back to its home."
"Back to its…" Vulpes paused, narrowing his eyes at her. "Where did it come from?"
"North," Sandra replied. "Up in Frosthill."
Vulpes fell silent, standing by the water's edge and saying nothing, merely staring at her with an oddly somber look about him.
Sandra stared, studying him and feeling that something was amiss—though, not anything particularly bad. No, it was simply unusual—almost as if she could feel that some barrier had been removed, as if the many layers of violence and discipline on Vulpes Inculta had suddenly faded away overnight.
In fact—if she wasn't imagining it, he almost looked like an ordinary person right now, merely staring at her with hesitant concern.
"What?" she uttered. "What's wrong…?"
Vulpes remained quiet for a second, glimpsing to the side, then back at her.
"I thought we were going back home," he muttered.
Sandra gave him an odd look. "I can't yet. Randall's waiting for me in Frosthill—and now Niner and Arcade are there, too. I'm gonna do the job up there. I still plan to."
"Why?" Vulpes breathed, stepping forward and eyeing her intently. "Haven't you done enough by now?"
"No," Sandra stated. "Almost—but no. The door's wide open for Marko to start taking over all the bad games in the Mojave if he wants to, and he's the last threat left. He's the last one before the endgame. That box has gotta be checked off before we can be done."
The two fell silent again, Vulpes staring into the water while Sandra's eyes remained on him.
"I thought you'd want to," Sandra said honestly, giving him another look of intrigue. "I really thought you'd like the idea of us… coming together… and doing this again."
Vulpes gazed into the shimmering waters profoundly for a moment. Then, his gaze shifted back to hers, his eyes seeming deeper in their stark cerulean than they ever had.
"I've never been that close to dying before," he murmured.
Sandra swallowed, observing him and feeling a pinch of empathy.
Honestly, for all the violent close calls that Vulpes had experienced—she knew for certain he was right. This latest encounter, with starvation and crucifixion, was the most drastic endeavor he'd ever endured—in fact, she could see and practically feel it all now, as it seemed to have left some lasting impression on him, as if it had somehow changed him in ways neither of them expected or understood.
And—she only just realized it now—Vulpes must've been tailing her and searching for her for quite a long time before finally managing to track her up to Utah. He probably had a plan in mind, a plan of taking her home and finally returning to their old lives, a plan that was not coming to fruition here and now.
Of course he didn't want to chase demons any longer.
And—quite honestly—neither did she.
It was just something that had to be done.
"I wanna go home, too," Sandra told him sincerely. "But I have to finish this one last thing… okay? Just this. Just this job in Frosthill… then we all go home."
Vulpes gazed into her, expression troubled, yet softer than before. He released a deep cloud of breath, seeming to read every inch of her visage through his solemn, reflective stare.
"I think you wanted to change me," he mumbled breathlessly. "And I think… you have."
Sandra returned his stare, saying nothing.
"Because I… don't," Vulpes said in a wispy exhalation, sounding somewhat surprised by himself. "I… don't… want this anymore."
Sandra continued to stare, still speechless, feeling another gentle pain in her chest.
"I'd fight any day. I'd fight for us until the end," Vulpes told her. "But living your life always looking for that fight… it's just… exhausting."
"I know," Sandra understood. "Y'know, this… none of this… is actually what I want to do. It's just what I have to. Hell, I can think of fifty other people who'd be better at this than me… but just… they just… won't. Nobody else is gonna do it. But… it has to get done. So… y'know… here I am."
"We all would," Vulpes reminded her. "If you would've told us, or let us help you—we all would have. Not just you."
"Yeah… yeah, you would. But that's just not fair," Sandra replied with a pained, breathless laugh. "The only other people willing to take this on are the ones I wanna keep safe from it. That's just not fair of God to do."
"No worthwhile conquests have ever been established on grounds that were fair," Vulpes stated.
Sandra flashed a half-smile. "Now that sounds more like you…"
"I just—I want the same thing," Vulpes told her. "I want the same thing you do. I want them all gone so it can all be over."
Sandra slowly nodded, thinking of Ulysses again and revealing another smirk. "Well… I have a way of doing that. We take care of Frosthill, and I got the rest covered from there."
She turned, adjusting the saddle and preparing to mount it, Vulpes examining her curiously now.
"Joshua Graham spoke of Courier Six," Vulpes recalled. "But he spoke as if it was someone other than you."
Sandra tightened the straps on the horse, staring down and acting as if she didn't hear him.
"And I can only think of one other Courier Six," Vulpes added, squinting at her skeptically. "A Legion defector like me… who has an entire missile silo at his disposal now."
Sandra placed a hand on the horse, facing him again and looking suddenly expressionless.
Vulpes read her, noting every detail of her and seeming to draw the right conclusion.
"You know a genocide of the Legion wouldn't only kill the Legion," he informed, his tone darkening. "It will kill anyone even remotely near the Legion as well—along with all the captives they have. Entire droves of innocent people will perish alongside them if you choose to take that path."
"I'm surprised you care," Sandra uttered.
"So am I," Vulpes admitted.
The two merely stared at one another for a moment.
"Is that really what you want to do?" he asked her.
Sandra sighed heavily.
"No," she mumbled. "But… like I said… none of this is what I wanna do. I just have to."
They both hesitated again.
Sandra then faced him, trying to smile and sauntering over to him.
"Frosthill is nice," she assured. "It's really chill and peaceful. And trust me… I took out a lot of hard bounties by myself. If I can do that, then… all four of us back together can take out a few more bounties real easy. It's not gonna be as crazy and hellish as you think. It's almost like a vacation up there."
Vulpes stared at her.
Sandra maintained her smile. "Just Frosthill… then we all go back home for good."
Vulpes paused, biting his lip for a moment, then making a nod. "I go where you go."
Sandra's smile grew, and she started toward the horse again—then Vulpes marched forward and grabbed her, snapping a hand around her wrist and halting her mid-step.
Sandra stopped, staring at him expectantly.
Vulpes glared at the ground, his grasp on her tightening, seeming to be very deep in thought.
Then, his gaze ventured up to hers, and their eyes of blue met yet again.
"I can't think why… you always seem to see something worth… saving… in me," he murmured with some difficulty. "But I…"
He paused several times, trying to find the words and losing them entirely—but, Sandra watched, a coy smirk emerging as she studied him closely, knowing for certain what he thought and felt now.
"You know what's crazy," she said, facing him fully and placing her hand over his, giving it a single pat. "The day I first met you… I never would've imagined you acting grateful about anything. You've come a hell of a long way since then."
Vulpes was silent, returning her stare with a deep, quizzical look about him.
"You saved me even back then," he uttered moments later. "Long before I was ever… the way I am now…"
"I always knew you could change. I've seen it before," Sandra said knowingly. "Not giving you a chance would've been a waste of a powerful person. You'd be surprised how powerful it is to show some compassion to someone who's never seen it before."
Vulpes squinted at her. "And you knew that back then? While you were lost and tottering on the brink of insanity?"
Sandra scoffed out a laugh, clutching his hand tighter.
"I knew that before I ever left home," she told him definitively.
Vulpes stared at her interestingly.
"Charon taught me," Sandra said solemnly. "And, y'know… I always wondered why. I always wondered why God put me in that situation with him, where I could show him some compassion… and finally give him someone who gives a damn about him… just to have him get ripped away. I always wondered why it had to be that way. But now… I don't know… now…"
Her thumb gingerly stroked along his hand.
"Now I get it," Sandra knew. "He was the happiest he'd ever been at the end of his life… and that whole thing taught me everything I needed to know… before I'd go west, and meet you."
She gently raised his hand from her wrist, intertwining her fingers with his.
"I had to learn all that with him… so I could do it all with you," Sandra told him genuinely. "If not for Charon, I probably wouldn't see you the way I do. Besides… I'm not any more a saint than you are. I've done a lot of messed-up things just like you have. If I hated you for that, then I'd have to hate me, too. But… I don't see it that way. I just see us both as being strong and screwed-up people… and we're capable of being better than we ever were before. And… well… we are. We are better now."
Vulpes gazed into her. "Are we…?"
Sandra tilted her head, giving him a look. "Foxxy… you've wiped out entire droves of people before. You excelled at it back in the day. But right here, right now, you just stood here, and looked me in the eye, and tried to talk me out of doing that exact same thing… because you apparently give a damn about all the innocent people it would kill. Have you ever cared about that before?"
Vulpes glimpsed down, pondering on this and remaining silent.
"You're like a regular human being now," Sandra said with a laugh, swinging his hand to and fro. "Charon got there. Joshua got there. Now you're getting there… and I always knew you could. I don't know how, but I did. So… there you go."
"Oh… don't put any stock in my humanity yet," Vulpes replied, cracking a slight smile. "I've yet to deal with any of your little bounties up north."
Sandra snickered, patting his hand once more before releasing it. She then turned and prepared to mount the horse, waving for him to join her.
"You don't need to steer the creature," Vulpes remarked. "I can do that."
"No—I'm gonna drive the horse," Sandra snarked in response, leaping swiftly upright and draping her leg over the animal, sitting perfectly on its large saddle. "You still need to recover some more. Get up here and just rest for a while. We got a long ride ahead."
She reached down, taking his hand and pulling him upright.
Vulpes settled on the saddle just behind her, pressed against her as his arms curled warmly around her.
"Heeyah!" Sandra yelled—flicking the ropes and urging the horse to move.
Long-Face began a brisk stride over the terrain, and Sandra guided it for a long while—Vulpes lying softly and cozily against her back, resting his head, and feeling as if he could sleep here for all eternity.
The horse carried them out of Zion, trekking back north and escorting them to the place of their final endgame beyond the Mojave—where many long games and many grudges unresolved would finally come to a definite end.