My Brother's Best Friend

Summary: AU. Botan, younger sister to Youko Kurama, has a crush on his best friend, Kuronue. Why does he always torment her? Does he feel the same? Will it work out in the end?

A/N: Okay, I was on total sugar high making this, and it's not as fluffy as the other chapters, but it's funny. It has Botan playing a sick joke on Kuronue for taking her bra at strip poker.

Shoujo Bat: I swear I have no clue why in the hell I thought of this. I hope you guys think it's funny. This is just pure, random, sick, humor.

Botan: -reading through chapter- No way in hell!

Kuronue: What?

Botan: -takes only copy of chapter- Nothing. Any who, Shoujo Bat doesn't own YYH but she does own her own fact that Kuronue doesn't like milk.

Chapter 4-One Sick Lady

Kuronue awoke to a gentle shaking sensation. His best friend was standing over him, trying to wake up the log that was himself. The fox demon stopped as Kuronue sat up, stretching his arms out and yawning hugely. Idly scratching the back of his head, Kuronue said,

"What is it, Youko? It's six in the damn morning..." The chimera's eyes were still half closed, and he looked ready to drop off again at any moment. "You know I was up late yesterday..."

"I know and I don't care, but Botan wants to see you," Youko said, scratching his head. "She said she had something to discuss, but she wouldn't tell me what it was."

Kuronue snorted. "Trust Botan to wake me up at six in the goddamn morning..." he muttered. He shook his head, arched his back, stretched his wings, and got up, heading into the bathroom. "Tell her I'll be there by seven," he said, then closed the door. Youko sighed and went to deliver the message to a grinning Botan.

At Seven

Botan resisted the urge to look up as a considerably more awake Kuronue, dressed in his signature black outfit and black buckle hat, pushed open the door to her office and walked in. Kuronue stopped in front of her desk and stood there with his arms crossed, tapping his foot impatiently. Two, five, ten minutes passed, as Kuronue's temper smoldered like a slow fire and Botan pretended to be engrossed in a her paperwork. In a battle of patience, Kuronue was doomed to lose.

"Well?" he finally said, as Botan showed no sign of acknowledging his presence at all.

Botan looked up at last in an utterly insincere show of surprise. "Kuro-kun, there you are," she said, looking about as unsurprised as it was possible for anyone to get. Kuronue just fumed and waited for her to talk. He was wasting precious sleeping time!

Botan grinned, cleared her throat, and said, "Anyway, Kuro-kun... I have heard from a reliable inside source that you refuse to drink milk, I believe brother told me that." Kuronue twitched guiltily.

"As the only female here who cares about your well-being at all, it is my responsibility to see to it that you take your calcium. So..." Botan looked around, as if making sure there was nobody within earshot.

"Seeing as you don't like normal milk, how would you like to try some of mine?"

"What?" Kuronue said, taken aback.

"My milk," repeated Botan. "In my opinion, it's creamier, tastier, and more nutritious than normal milk."

An ugly thought reared its head, and Kuronue colored abruptly. "Botan-"

"And moreover," the fire demon continued, as if Kuronue hadn't said anything, "it doesn't come from cows."

"But... but..." Kuronue sputtered, his brain trying and failing to make sense of the situation. All he could think clearly about the situation was 'Botan, milk, not from cows, hers…'

"So what do you say, Kuro-kun?" Botan said, "Why don't you come with me right now and I'll give you some." To Kuronue, it seemed that Botan's grin was far too wide for its own good.

Youko, who had been waiting outside, looked up as the door to his sister's paper work office slammed open and Kuronue burst out, his face a remarkable shade of red. His nose was bleeding, but it seemed he didn't care at the moment. Before Youko could do more than stand up, Kuronue whipped around and shouted into the door,

"You are one sick lady Botan! SICK!"

"Kuronue-" Youko started to say, then yelped in surprise as Kuronue wordlessly grabbed his hand and dragged him off, narrowly avoiding full frontal collision with the cat demon Rina. Youko's faint protests faded quickly as the best friend's disappeared around a corner. Rina entered Botan's office and set the mug she'd been carrying down on her desk.

"Your daily mug of goat's milk, Botan-chan," she said, then paused for a moment. "Pardon my asking, Botan-chan, but why was Kuronue so upset on his way out?"

Botan grinned innocently, bringing the mug to her lips. "I don't have the faintest idea," she said. "Perhaps he misunderstood what I was saying?" 'That's for taking my bra yesterday'

A/N: My best friend was reading this over my should, and she laughed so hard. Anyway I hope you reviewers enjoyed my weird, perverted humor. Please forgive my extreme shortness, it's only 920 words, but I'll make the next chapter longer and have some fluff.

Quote of the chapter

So..." Botan looked around, as if making sure there was nobody within earshot. "Seeing as you don't like normal milk, how would you like to try some of mine?"