The next morning Ana was at the table on time with a full tray of food. She was terribly excited, for she had never been to see the Bazhir before. Addam Slama, the Bazhir noble, had taken it upon himself to instruct Ana in Bazhir customs.

"You will not get any respect at first because you are not wearing a veil and are dressing in men's clothes, but if you remain respectful hopefully they will not be too offended," Addam said. "Actually, it might be better for you to adopt men's manners of the Bazhir while you are there, but remain submissive to your knight master in their view."

She grinned at Addam. "Thanks. Sir Merric is strict in that, so I don't think it will be a problem. Also, I think they will mistake me for his daughter because we share the same hair color."

"True," Addam said. He had an easy smile that flashed in contrast against his dark skin.

"Good morning, Kimi," Ana greeted her. "Are you well?"

"Well enough," she replied with a sincere smile.

"I thought you weren't a morning person?" Furtan teased her.

"Oh, I'm not," she said cheerfully. "But then it depends on the day. Today looks good, but tomorrow you may want to skip breakfast."

The pages laughed and finished eating. Classes went much better than the day before, and Kimi got full marks on her math problems. There was one disturbing presence throughout the morning, and it was the hostile glares of Frantisek and his friends boring into her back. It unnerved her a little, but she ignored it.

At the stables that afternoon, Frantisek shoved her back into the empty stall, but this time she was ready. She grabbed his arm and flung him over her hip into the stall. She lost her balance briefly and stumbled backwards, only to be steadied by Jonathan. She ripped her arm out of his grasp and faced Frantisek again who had returned to his feet.

"Do you realize how stupid you're being?" she cried and he glared at her. "At least try to get me alone to beat me up, not in broad view of every page here who might step up to beat some sense into you for me, and with the chance my Lord HaMinch might come in and see you. Gods," she cursed and ran a hand through her hair. "I know you hate me and want me gone. I get the message. Now will you leave me alone so we both don't ruin our chances here?"

"Never. You shouldn't be here, half-breed. You don't even look Tortallan. I bet your swine of a mother cheated on your father."

That last phrase was more than Kimi could handle. She jumped on him and began hitting him with all her strength. She heard Jonathan cry, "Kimi, no!" Hands tried to force her off of him. Frantisek had a light of triumph in his eyes as he beat her back, but it was only a few moments before someone grabbed her and successfully dragged her off of him. She was furious and trying to get away from her captor, but he was stubborn. She looked up into the wide and patient face of Furtan and glared hotly at him.

"Let me go!"

"No, you're hurt. You should go to the healers'."

Kimi's eyes grew huge. "No," she cried and struggled harder. Her father would be there, and if he found out she had been fighting… She really wasn't willing to face his wrath.

Furtan dragged her out of the stables to the training master outside. "What is this?" he cried when he saw the bloodied page.

"Kimi fell down," Furtan said calmly. "She needs to go see a healer. May I escort her?"

Lord HaMinch looked perplexed and nodded. Frantisek was also dragged out by Patrik and Theo. He had a black eye, but besides that looked perfectly healthy. Kimi sighed unhappily with her work. True, Frantisek was stronger and heavier than she was, but it was still a disappointment that she got hurt more than he did.

Furtan guided her away from the practice courts to the palace. "Please don't make me go to the healers," Kimi begged. "I'm a healer, just take me to my room and I'll heal myself."

"Kimi, your nose is broken, your lip is swollen and you have a large bruise over the left side of your face. You need a healer. Not to mention all the bruises I can't see."

"But my father is in there!" She began to cry. "He'll kill me if he finds out I've been fighting…"

"He'll probably find out anyway. Fights between pages are often ground work for gossipers in a castle like this. Come on, go inside." Kimi found herself in front of the door with the mark etched on it for healers. Furtan opened the door and pushed her in.

"Kimi!" Neal cried when he saw her. "Mithros, what happened to you?" He led her to a low lying table and sat her down on it. His eyes were filled with worry.

"I fell down," she said thickly. Neal touched her nose and Kimi allowed him to mend it.

"That's code for being in a fight," Neal said as he cleaned the blood off her face. "I wasn't born yesterday, young lady."

"That's for certain." Kimi glared at her father as he looked up sharply into her eyes. She didn't want to appear to be weak, especially to him, and so tried her best to act tough.

"Enough, who were you in a fight with?" He cleaned a scar above her eyebrow more roughly than he intended.

"Ow! I told you, I fell down. Please, leave it at that, Da. I'm already humiliated. My first real fight only lasted a few seconds, I got twice as hurt as he did, and now I have to be treated by my father. The same father who's made me a joke."

He pulled his hand back from her face, green fire still glinting at his fingertips. "What's that supposed to mean?" His face looked astonished.

She looked at him with real tears in her eyes. "You – you asked Jonathan to protect me. You were in correspondence with the training master to think of ideas to protect me. I don't need your protection anymore, Da. I'm trying to learn how to be a knight, and you're still protecting me. How am I supposed to protect people when no one thinks I can protect myself?"

He looked slightly embarrassed. "I am your father and I think I know what's best for my eldest daughter." His green eyes clouded over with anger. "Obviously you need protection, if it's your second day and you're already getting into fights. And don't take that tone with me."

"Fine, then, I'll leave." Kimi jumped up and winced a little as she walked to the door.

"Kimiko, come right back here. I'm not finished yet." Kimi turned slowly, for she knew not to disobey him when he used that voice. She bowed stiffly, Yamani-style and returned to sit on the table.

She remained still faced as she suffered her father's scolding and healing. "I am concerned for you. If you get into too many fights Lord HaMinch might see that as an excuse to make you leave." He pulled back her hair and cleaned the dried blood on her hairline. "Kimi, it really isn't in your nature to start physical fights. An intelligent verbal sparring is more your style, like me." He smiled at her.

"Da, I have to fight, or I won't get any respect."

His face became hard. "You will not fight again, Kimiko. Do you understand me?"

"Her face became as cold as his and her voice was icy. "Yes, sir." When Neal was finished, Kimi walked to the door. She turned and looked at him steadily.

"Do you want to know what he said to provoke me?" she asked. She could feel heat pounding in her head and thoughts calling out warnings to stop, but she continued recklessly. "He said that I didn't even look Tortallan and that my mother must have cheated on my father. How I wish that were true." Silence followed her statement. Neal looked like he had been slapped. Kimi instantly regretted her words when she saw intense hurt spread across his face. Neal tried to school his features but failed.

"Well," he said finally. "You may wish it but you are stuck with me. Now hurry to the training courts."

"Da, I –"

"Now. You've already missed about an hour. Hurry." And he turned away from her.

Kimi knew a dismissal when she heard it, but it didn't make her feel any better to obey. She tried not to think about her father when she practiced blocking Ulric's weak punches and when she returned them. Lord HaMinch informed her that she had an hour's detention every night after dinner for a week.

Frantisek cooled down after their fight and detention, and he no longer cornered her anymore. But the hostile stares and remarks continued and Kimi learned to ignore them. Kimi also found out that the next day after her fight with Frantisek that her father had packed up and went home, relinquishing his role as one of the palace healers. Her mother had stayed for a week with Shinkokami; and on the last day came to visit Kimi.

"Kimi," her mother said with pleasure when she answered the door. "May I come in?" Kimi held the door wider and Yuki entered. "What happened to your Yamani waving cats?" Yuki asked with a very slight frown.

"I thought I was getting too old for them so I put them away."

Yuki settled primly on the chair. "I see," her voice and face revealed nothing.

"Fruit juice?" Kimi offered.

'Do you have green tea?"

Kimi blushed pink. "I – uh – no, drank it all." Truthfully all of her tea and cups were in the box under the bed, but she was too embarrassed to retrieve them.

"Oh? I guess I will have to send you some more then."

"That's all right, mum, you don't have to. Really, I'm fine."

Yuki stared at her daughter thoughtfully. "I see," she said again. "Fruit juice is fine." Kimi nervously poured her a cup, wondering how much her father had told Yuki. "Your father seemed very upset the other day," Yuki said conversationally.

"Oh?" she gulped on her fruit juice.

"Yes, but he wouldn't tell me what was wrong." She stared at Kimi directly. "What did you say to him, Kimi?"

"Kimi blushed. "Was he really that upset?"

"Very," Yuki said calmly.

"Can you tell him I'm sorry, and that I didn't mean it?"

"It depends, what didn't you mean?"

"I said I wish he wasn't my father," Kimi said quietly. She refused to meet Yuki's eyes.

Yuki didn't say anything for a moment. "Kimi, I am leaving tomorrow morning. Take care, and I will visit soon." Yuki got up to leave, and Kimi bowed to her. Kimi could feel the shame burning hot into her skin. She couldn't help but wonder if her father would ever forgive her for her careless words spoken in anger. Yuki hesitated at the door. "Kimi, your father loves you very much, and only wishes to see you happy. He tries his best. Remember that. He will remember it shortly for you."

"Yes, mother." Kimi could feel tears start to gather in her eyes again. "Farewell."

Yuki closed the door behind her and Kimi got ready for bed. Acting on impulse she pulled the box of Yamani objects out from under the bed and pulled out a waving cat. She studied his bright colors and happy face and began to cry. She threw it back into the box and it shattered. "I hate you," she sobbed and grabbed her pillow to hug. She kicked the box back under the bed.

"Kimi?" a voice called through the door. "I heard glass break, are you all right?"

"Yes, Furtan. I just dropped – uh – the teapot."

"Do you need any help?"

"No, I think I got it. Thank you!" She heard him walk away. "This was a mistake," she told the empty room. "I should have never come here."

Unbidden, images came to her. Riding her new mount Sanda, a successful block and blow against her fellow pages, the feeling of her father's sword in her hand when he allowed her to hold it. The faces of Patrik, Furtan, Jonathan, Gary, Theo and Ana floated in her mind and she disagreed with herself. She should be here, and never would she allow herself to think this was a mistake again.