Beginnings

Shinara's POV

"Finally Minia has found her way back. What did you go shopping for Minia? I mean its only four of us. Why six bags?" I exclaimed.

"Better too much than not enough," She said. She looked around and saw all of our expressions, then she began again, "whatever we don't use and won't use we can sell it! And look," She said while reaching in her pocket, "I didn't spend all of your money either. I spent like . . . half of it! See I did do well!" She added with her bright smile.

It was almost impossible not to laugh or smile at her, for we all did a combination of both when she was finished. She could be so sweet and innocent seeming sometimes.

"All right let's go then." I said. And we began walking toward the exit of the town so we could start home.

"Hey! Will you guys help me with the bags or something? I can't carry them all!" She yelled. We turned around and walked back to where she was standing looking like a lost child. Each of us took a bag leaving her with three.

"Why do I have to take three? There are two guys here!" She complained.

"Because neither of these two guys asked you to go and buy all these . . . things." Hannan stated.

"Hannan," She whined, "please? For me?"

He looked for just a moment that he was going to take them for her. Then he gave her the biggest smile in the world.

"Let me think for one second," He paused and Minia began to glow, "no." He finally said. I burst out laughing and Dali cracked a small smile, I guess he was trying to be nice. Minia gave me this evil glare. I tried to stifle my laughter.

"I'm sorry Minia. I couldn't help it. Well now that we have that covered . . ."

"We don't have anything covered! I still have three bags!" she whined.

"Now that we have that covered," I continued, "we can make our way home." I concluded.

"I have a suggestion." Dali stated and I paused. And I guessed I looked surprised because Hannan elbowed me, so I fixed my face.

"Go on." Hannan said.

"Why don't we go to a shop or somewhere and get some burlap sacks or something so we won't have to carry these bags around in case we get encountered by some fiends or something? I mean, I'm just saying . . ." He added when no one responded.

I cleared my throat and then I began, "No Dali that's a great idea. We could also use them for the journey and stuff."

"Yeah, I was thinking that but I didn't say it." He replied. I wish I knew why he was so shy and unsure of himself. I mean he was a great kid. He only really talked when we first met, I guess it was the whole getting acquainted thing.

So we turned around and quickly ran into a store and just grabbed five sacks just to be safe. Afterwards we almost ran to the exit of the town. It was really getting late. I kept looking back at Minia to make sure she was all right. Her burlap was a little bigger than ours since it was holding more than ours. But otherwise she was fine.

After we got a little while away from the town we slowed down and stayed together. And dreadfully we encountered a few fiends. All of us took our fighting stances. Dali began with a Flurry of Styx to the chest of a Salamander who fell down but quickly arose and swiped him with its tail knocking him down and the wind out fo his chest. Minia quickly ran up and gave him a Hammer Spin with the mallet none of us knew she had brought with her, but it luckily killed the Salamander.

Hannan hit the Canbria Dayfly with a powerful Madness Hero that was almost countered but Hannan caught him and smacked him with the back of his sword. I ran up and attacked him trying to pull off a Hard Blade which was countered and I was sent flying off in the field. I quickly dusted myself and began to run back over to the battle. Being knocked down kind of pissed me off. I was fuming. Dali quickly followed up with a Double Punch and killed the Dayfly before I could hit it again. We picked up two Healing Potions and continued on our way.

"You okay Shinara?" Minia asked. She looked a little afraid.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I replied hastily.

"You don't seem it. I mean everyone's attacks gets countered sometimes. You can't be too angry." She offered.

"Well I didn't see yours or Dali or even Hannan get countered and get sent flying halfway across the field! So you don't know!" I yelled and turned my head. I didn't mean to yell at her. I was just a little angry. I was almost ready to stop fighting. I hate fighting with my right arm. I will never be good enough.

I took my Raiper out of the sheath and began hacking away at a nearby tree.

"I will never be fucking good enough! I . . hate . . . my . . . life! Why me?" I dropped my sword and fell to the ground. How can my father expect me to do whatever it is that they want me to do when I can't even successfully try to attack a simple Dayfly. I looked up and everything was blurry and only then did I realize I was crying. I wiped my eyes and caught Hannan's gaze. He looked at me with this look . . . was it disgust? I don't understand. I thought. Was he disappointed in me? Of course he was. I can't fight anymore. I'm a failure. We continued the rest of the way in silence and interrupted by fiends.

When we finally got there, everyone was still up, I guess waiting for us to return. It's understandable. We are kind of young. I was still angry, but attempting to hide it until I got into my room.

"How did everything go? Did you get everything that you need?" My mother asked us.

We all mumbled our response and I guess she caught that it went as good as expected for them. I put my bag down at the door and walked into my room. It was dark because no light was on. The only source or light was the gentle glow of the moon. Why does it look . . . is it red? I walked to my window and again, the moon was turning a steady red, as if it was being dipped in blood once again.

I sat down on my bed and sighed. I felt so defeated. I took off my clothes and put my night clothes on. I stretched out across my bed and just laid down. I got tired of laying there after a few minutes so I went back to the window, where the moon was now yellow again.

"Shinara?" My father called from the door.

"Come in." I replied.

"What happened today? I can't get a straight answer out of anyone. Meru seems sad, Dali is confused, and Hannan, if I am correct on my observation is angry." My father speculated. Hannan? Angry? Was I that disappointing to him?

"Well, we encountered a fiend on the way home and everyone was able to execute their attacks except for me. Mine was countered and it sent me flying halfway across nowhere. After Dali finished him off, I was just brooding around as we walked and I kind of snapped on Minia. And I went to a tree and started hacking at it until I felt so worthless that I just slid to the floor and sat there and I didn't realize until I looked up that I was crying. And when I looked at Hannan he gave me this look of disgust that really hurt me because I know they were disappointed that I didn't finish my attack but I mean I was sorry it wasn't my fault I mean everyone makes mistakes! I just feel so bad and I feel worthless as a fighter. I knew I couldn't ever be successful with my right hand. I should just quit this journey thing before it ever stars." I finally finished. I just poured out everything I felt to my dad. He was the only one who understood me.

"Now Shinara, as I listened to you, you totally contradicted yourself." He said calmly.

"I did. How?" I asked genuinely puzzled.

"At first you said it wasn't your fault, you're sorry and everyone makes mistakes. Then you said you're worthless and all of this other stuff. Your right, everyone makes mistakes and they will have to understand that. You are all young people you will all make your share of mistakes. And you are also right about the worthless thing. You will be worthless if you let this one, mistake stop you from fighting again. You can't expect to be as good with your right arm as your left. It isn't your left arm, you haven't been fighting with it as long as you have with your left arm. So tomorrow morning I expect you to be up and practicing before we all get up and make your right arm as good as your left arm. You can't let this defeat you. If you do, you can't be my daughter. I never gave and neither will you." He said this and kissed me on my cheek and left me with my thoughts. Soon to be my dreams because soon afterwards I fell into a deep slumber, exhausted from the days events . . .