Everything he Is

by:

SilentConfession

AKA

Zana

Summary: Its Hemione's seventh year, Fred and George are the new flying instructors what happens when Hogwarts biggest prankster comes face to face with Hogwarts bookworm?

Hermione bit hard down onto her lip to keep from screaming. She picked up what had once been her green sweater and stared at it in horror. She fingered the fabric carefully before throwing it onto her
bed violently.

Hermione closed her eyes and took a deep breath in, hoping with all her heart that when she opened them again her wardrobe would be back to normal. She slowly peeked at her distorted wardrobe and sighed,

"Oh Hermione what are you moaning about now? You forgot to finish an assignment?" Lavender snorted, and sat up in her bed, Hermione forcefully grabbed her uniform and shoved it in Lavender's face,

"You see this?" Hermione jabbed her finger into the uniform, "This is something to moan about!" Hermione shrieked, "Oh I'm going to be in soo much trouble!" She ended up in a soft whimper; Hermione shrank back to her own bed and collapsed on it.

"Who did that?" Lavender asked a small smile playing on her lips,

"The same person who has made my life miserable this year, the same person who turned my bed to spiders! Who attacked this friggen blanket to my back, who else could it be!" Hermione ranted angrily,

"Why don't you just change it back? I mean you aren't a witch for nothing."

"Oh…right." Hermione blushed and grabbed her wand that was sitting by her bedside table and muttered an enlargement charm. The wand exploded into a puff of foul smelling smoke and some bright fireworks. Hermione screamed in surprise and dropped her purple doll-sized uniform stepping back from the disaster.

"Shut up!" Pavarti groaned into her pillow, Hermione seethed angrily and glared at her now empty hand.

Hermione pulled the blanket around herself tightly trying to get rid of the feeling of coldness, but she was still shivering mercilessly. She huffed in frustration, and clamored out of the girl's dorm to find Harry.

"Geez Herms you forget to take a shower!" Ron complained loudly waving his hand over his nose when Hermione reached the common room. She glared at Ron before turning to Harry.

"Harry can you do something for me? Since my wand erm… exploded."

"Perhaps," Hermione stood on her tiptoes and whispered her problem into Harry's ear. A wide grin spread across Harry's face and he began to laugh.

"Har-ry!" Hermione whined, "It's not funny." Harry just laughed harder, Hermione scowled at him, and Ron was looking between the two of them with a suspicious look. "Harry please this is mortifying!" Hermione pleaded, tugging on Harry's arm,

"Herms if you're so sick of them pranking you why don't you just go to the heads dorm?" Harry asked between gasps of laughter.

"Have you ever met Gavin Moon? He is such a conceited egocentric big head I'm surprised he can get his head through a door! And personally he makes me sick and I want to spend as much time away from him as possible! Now get this blanket off me and this… smell!" Hermione demanded glaring at the passing Gryffindor's who were plugging their noses. Hermione reluctantly let the blanket fall around her, Ron gapped at her and grabbed a handful of the blanket before she could protest and yanked on it… hard.

"Ron!" Hermione bellowed falling to the floor, "What did you do that for?"

"I though it would come off." Ron said blushing,

"Idiot." Harry coughed into his hand,

"Oh Harry do you need to go get a potion for that cough?" Hermione asked stifling her giggles,

"No, no I think I'm fine now." Harry smirked, Ron was fuming and her ears were bright red, Hermione started to giggle,

"Okay, okay jokes on me can we go now!" Ron said loudly,

"No, Harry please?" Harry grabbed his wand from his robes and muttered the unsticking charm, nothing happened, Hermione sighed, Harry tried a few more other charms but nothing happened,

"Bloody Hell Harry, stop your making the stench worse!" Ron said this time putting part of his robe to his nose; Hermione had to agree with him, the stench was getting stronger every time Harry tried a new spell. Hermione groaned and muttered something about how the twins were going to die a very painful death.

"I cannot do this! I can't leave this common room!" Hermione wailed,

"Hey Hermione what's the long face for?" Ginny said cheerfully coming down the steps.

"Your blasted brothers!" Hermione said sharply,

"Ew! Hermione is that you?" Ginny said her nose scrunching up; Hermione glared at Ginny,

"Yes Gin it is! Not my fault either!"

"So tell me what exactly did they do?" Ginny asked her face showing interest,

"They destroyed everything! I have nothing to wear but my pyjama's, they shrunk all my clothes, some won't even fit a small doll! Oh that's not even all, some are flashing different colors and my wand exploded and made me smell like this!" Hermione screeched, "And this blasted blanket is attached to me and every time someone tries to fix it doesn't work and the smell gets worse." Hermione whimpered.

"Well Hermione don't forget what I told you, I'm here if you ever need some help." Ginny said smirking it wasn't often you see a completely powerless Hermione, one that was a complete damsel in distress. Hermione's eyes widened and a small smile graced her lips for a second before a scowl replaced it again.

"Sure Ginny, so Harry do you have a sweater I'm really cold!" Ron snorted; Ginny skipped away humming a small tune.

"Somehow I'm getting the feeling that today is going to be a very odd day indeed." Harry said before running up to his dorm to get a sweater. Ron took a step away from Hermione giving her an odd look.

"Oh… honestly Ronald grow up!" Hermione snapped, he made a face but didn't move toward her, Hermione rolled her eyes and pulled the blanket around herself once again shivering slightly,

"Here 'Mione." Harry threw his sweater at her, she caught it, but didn't put it one right away, she stared at it for a second before shrugging and muttering,

"I can't look worse." She pulled the sweater over her head and over the blanket with some difficulty. Ron's eyes widened,

"And here I thought the oddness of the situation was at its oddest I got proven wrong." He muttered to himself, Harry smirked,

"Oh for goodness sake!" Hermione grumbled, looking down at herself, "I look like a giant bloated hippo!"

"You know you have to hand it to them though, I mean they're brilliant," Harry commented seriously, Hermione groaned and buried her face in her hands,

"Harry can I just stay here, I can't go out like this,"

"I mean seriously I wouldn't thought of that, its complete brilliance, I wonder how they made you look so erm… bloated from a mere sweater? It was my sweater and wasn't charmed or anything…"
Harry trailed off muttering nonsense to himself, seemingly not hearing Hermione's statement. Hermione glared at him,

"Oh please, its complete rubbish! And for your information it isn't that hard to figure out, they obviosly charmed me Harry. Though i'm not sure how..." Hermione growled, "and whose side are
you on anyway?"

"Yours" Harry answered quickly flushing slightly. "I'm just commenting on a prank well done, not that I like the prank being on you, mind you." Harry quickly added. Hermione let out a frustrated hrmf. "So Hermione you are just going to stay here, skip breakfast, and dare I say it… class?" Hermione bristled,

"Oh of course not Harry." Harry chuckled, "Lets go then I'm absolutely famished I can feel my stomach eating itself." Ron gave her an odd look,

"That's odd, we've always had to almost drag you to breakfast." Hermione shrugged her shoulders and with dread Hermione left the common room to face the rest of the school with her new 'look.'

Just before Hermione walked into the Great Hall she squared her shoulders and held her head high, hoping that showing a lot of confidence would throw everyone off and they wouldn't see her attire, or smell her either for that matter. The trio walked in and a steady hush fell over the Great Hall as they walked past the Slytherin table, Malfoy grabbed his nose and fell backward over his seat gagging. They walked on and found a seat at the Gryffindor table, some of the student moved away from them, Hermione rolled her eyes and muttered something around the lines of 'immature students.' Soon all was forgotten and Hermione piled her plate full of food and started to eat.

"Bloody Hell Hermione slow down, and you call me a pig!" Ron said after watching her gobble the food up.

"Honestly Ronald can't someone else be hungry other then you?" Hermione snapped glaring at him.

"Hungry? More like she's trying to erm... eat enough for an entire army." Ron muttered to Harry ending ratehr lamely, and snorted. Harry rolled his eyes and continued eating.

Twenty minuets later Ron and Harry watched Hermione fill her third plate full of food with something akin to disgust.

"Herms you done yet? We going to be late for potions if you don't stop soon." Harry said hopefully.

"No I'm not does it look like I am?" Hermione said before putting a forkful of pancakes into her mouth.

"But you've been eating non-stop for hours!" Ron whined,

"Oh honestly Ron stop being such a drama king." Harry snorted and looked at a blushing Ron.

"I'm not, but you've been eating as if their will soon be a famine!" Ron complained, Harry smirked, slightly and looked up at the staff table he noticed the twins were wearing there usual identical smirks
usually reserved for seeing the aftermath of a prank they pulled. Harry narrowed his eyes and glanced at Hermione,

"Erm… Hermione?"

"What?" Hermione snapped, "Oh sorry Harry," her eyes apologetic immediately, "I'm just not having a good day."

"S'okay, anyway I was thinking,"

"Mate you know that's not a good thing right?" Ron said smirking,

"Oh be quite Ron." Hermione glared at him,

"Anyway I was thinking maybe the twins has something to do with your, erm… changed eating habits." Harry finished, grinned broadly at his brilliance.

"Of course not Harry how could they do something like that." But you could tell Hermione didn't believe what she said and she looked up at the staff table, there sat Fred and George this time they were leaning against the table for support because they were laughing so hard. Hermione put down her fork and got up from the table her eyes narrowed to slits. She tried pulling the blanket around her tightly but with the sweater inflated to a huge extent it just didn't work. She marched up to the staff table angrily her mouth curved to a narrow line. "Fred, George what have you done to me?" Hermione asked coldly placing her hands on the table locking their eyes into her piercing gaze.

"Nothing my dear Hermit," One of them said as innocently as he could, which for the twins, wasn't saying very much. Hermione eyed the two dangerously.

"Oh really?" Hermione said trying to fight back an urge to start screaming at them and in doing so her voice came out in a high sqeek "You call this nothing?" She said grabbing the blanket,

"Why Hermione I thought that was just a fashion crisis you were having,"

"A very bad crisis at that." The other added snickering,

"Turn me back! I want my bloody wardrobe back, I want this blanket gone I want to be normal again!" Hermione ended up screeching very loudly, the whole hall went silent and watched Hermione with the twins.

"And you don't want to... smell?" One of the twins supplied a wide grin spreading across his face. If looks could kill that twin would have been dead in a matter of seconds.

"You know what Hermit, we rather enjoy this so I don't think we'll do anything." Hermione's eyes widened in despair and her lower lip trembled, she though she seen one of the twins give her a sympathetic look but as soon as it came it was gone and he was laughing along with his brother.

"Then well could you give me back my wand that you erm… exploded?" Hermione pleaded, something she thought she would never give the twins the pleasure of hearing, her plead. She noticed how they looked at each other, smirked and nodded, one of them grabbed her wand and handed it to her, Hermione looked at them in surprise, she hadn't really expected them to give it back. She took it giving them both distrustful looks.

"Miss. Granger I do believe its time for you to take you seat," Dumbledore said with a twinkle in his eye, Hermione blushed,

"Sorry headmaster." Hermione mumbled, she gave the twins, who where both smirking, one final glare before turning around and faced the Great Hall. Everyone started to laugh at once, Hermione blushed again and hurried to her seat, Ron and Harry were both laughing so hard it looked like they would wet themselves soon. Hermione scowled at them and then looked at the food and scowled again.

"Let's go to class." Hermione said grabbing Harry and Ron's wrist and pulling them out of the Great Hall, "great friends you are." Hermione grumbled when they had gotten to the entrance hall,

"Sorry." Harry gasped out,

"You really should try keep you voice down everyone could hear you."

"Wow I never though you, Herms, had such a loud temper." Harry said after his laughter had subsided.

"Well I haven't been pranked for absolutely no reason either." Hermione said distastefully. She pulled her book-bag higher on her shoulder and stormed down toward the dungeons with Harry and Ron
trailing after her.

"Wow we made it." Ron said as he entered the potion's room.

"10 points from Gryffindor for almost being late." Snape said smirking, Ron glowered but knew better then to argue it would only get him more points off and a detention. The Slytherin's snickered and banged their hands on the desk cheering. The trio went and found seats, Hermione and Harry went and sat by Seamus and Ron reluctantly went and say by a giggling Pavarti and Lavender.

"Oh and Miss Granger 20 points for your dressing attire." Laughter was heard from the Slytherin side of the room, the Gryffindor's booed at getting more points taken away. Hermione huffed and pulled the blanket closer to herself. "Turn to page 197 and do the potion on that page hand it in, in a small flask at the end of class." Hermione quickly grabbed her book and flipped to the right page,

"Snape you batty grease-ball." A voice identical to Hermione's sneered, Hermione slammed the book shut and her face went pale. The rest of the Gryffindor's let out a collective gasp,

"Another 10 points, and a weeks worth of detentions for Miss Granger. My, my, my, aren't we getting a little imprudent. I don't want to say this again; page 197." Hermione cast a worried glance at Harry who gave her a knowing smile. She carefully opened the book to page 197 and nothing happened, she let out the breath she had been holding. Beside her Harry chuckled, Hermione hit him playfully on his arm and got up to get her supplies.

The class worked in silence for the next thirty minuets,

"Pssst Granger," Hermione looked over at Malfoy with a bored expression. "Nice perfume, where did you get it, the dump?" he sneered, Hermione rolled her eyes and ignored the laughter from the Slytherins. She turned back to the textbook and read the next instruction, while putting her finger under the line she was reading. Before she knew it a very familiar voice filled the air.

"Oy Snivillus vampire breath just like the old times eh?"

Authors Note: Wow, so sorry for the long wait. tries to duck the thousand tomatoes thrown, but fails miserably and is now covered with yucky tomatoy goopy stuff wow you guys are violent!

Please, review i really appreiate your CC, and anything else you add. lol

Okay i'm really sorry for taking so long to post, i really am, hopefully this chapter makes up for it...

i do have some excuses if you want to hear them.

1. i was working most of the weekends,

2. i had major brain shut down time

3. i was busyish

4. i was on a school trip for a week in May.

5. i was having troubles with motivation and writing this. Its coming to the end of the school year and i'm becoming real lazy its not even funny.

6. thats all, lol not very good, i am really sorry about the wait though, i'll try to get the next chapter up sooner but there is no promises, exams comming up, and well, my brain is still shutting down.

If you want to know when my fics are going to be updated, or how many pages are done, then just check out my bio, regular updates there. :)

Okay now on to the thanks to all my wonderful reviewers:)

Sennica01: Thanks fo the ideas, i might just use them, she'll be doing more then one. Thanks for your review. yes i agree they really do deserve it!

StAlKaHoLiC: Thank you so much:)

jesus4ever: lol, sorry it wasn't hurried, but hte chapter is here! thanks for your review.

hermionepotter4ever: its here!... Finally

PleaseExcuseTheOrneryPenguins: I've actaully never read any fics with pranks with feathers in them...Thanks you much.

KrazieChikadee: When you say slow down do you mean the Herm/Twin realshinship or the whole fic in general? wither way it is slowing down, i jsut need this part done.

thamker: why? cuz i can, lol jokes thanks for your review.

FlairVerona: Thanks, yes i do believe he does...

EponineWeasley: Thank you!

SileverGlitterSprite: Thanks for the review, sorry thats now exactly what happened but it was pretty close,

mm4ever2gether: Thank you:)

rachelne: yes it has to be big, i'm still thinking about it, thanks for the review and idea.

 yes it has to be big, i'm thinking about it, thanks for the review and idea.

Wow that took a long time you don't even know how long it told me to get this uploaded, curse this computer and freezing up! and this chapter was beta'd by GoldenGirl, lol thanks to her.