This chapter may come as a bit of a surprise!

Just to warn you, next Sunday (not tomorrow), I'm going on holiday for 2 weeks! (I hate holidays!) So I can't update during this time. But I'll work really hard so I can get another update posted before I leave! Maybe two if I have the time…

But moving on- I hope you enjoy this chapter and I'd be very happy to hear feedback from you- so please review! Thanks.

……………………………………………………………………………………………

Tala turned over and let his hand fall across my chest. I tried not to think about it and just get back to sleep, but I couldn't.

Yesterday, I'd told both Bryan and Kai that me and Tala weren't a couple. I guess looking at us from the outside, we must seem like an item; but we're not. We're just close friends…

At least I think we are…

…………………………………………………………………………………………..

Thursday – 3 DAYS TILL X-DAY

"You're going to school!" Tala yelled when he saw me in my uniform. "What the fuck?"

"Look, I wouldn't bother, but I need to see Kai." I sighed and buttoned my blazer. "I don't want to leave things as they are between us!" Tala flashed me a look of pure disgust, and got back into bed. "Tala, I don't want the next time we speak to by my confession!"

I swung my school bag over my shoulder and slipped on my shoes.

"Don't you hate him? Not even just a little- for what he's done?" Tala said sitting up.

"He got over excited. He's just upset that I made him believe something was wrong with me." I sat back down on the bed next to Tala. "He's just worried about me I guess…"

"That blazer really doesn't suit you." Tala smiled.

"What's that got to do with anything?" I snapped.

"You should stick to Chinese clothes. Western clothes make you look like someone you're not."

"Funny you should say that!" I laughed briefly. "Once Kai told me that this blazer suited me. Made me look like I had some 'dignity'."

"What a bastard!" Tala growled.

"Yep. He's a bastard all right." I giggled.

"Then how could you love him?" Tala begged. I spun my head round in shock at the way Tala said this. He sounded hurt and desperate, even though his face was smiling.

"I saw Bryan yesterday."

"Really! Where? How was he? Did he mention me?" Tala asked quickly.

"He's fine. He misses you." I thought for a while. "In fact, he was really cut up that you left."

"Oh…"

………………………………………………………………………………………….

Kai wasn't in his form room, the toilets, on the field, in a club or anywhere!

I sat in my empty form room- with my head on my empty desk- and had pointless day-dreams, wishing everything was better.

I wanted Kai to hold me. I wanted him to press his chest up against my own, tight enough so I could feel his heart beating. To feel his arms resting gently across my shoulders, and his hands clutching my back firmly. I wanted to feel his hot breath dance across my neck-line, and hold the back of his head gingerly as he did so. To be pushed up against walls and desks, thrown around, and yet never leaving Kai's embrace…

…There's something unfulfilling about loving someone with the same gender as yourself,…

"Having a good dream, Kon?" I bolted up-right coming face to face with Kai again. "I didn't think people could actually smile in their sleep."

"I was just…" I started in vain.

"Tala's really that good, is he?" He smiled, and sat on the desk in front of mine. Our gaze locked, with caused me to blush. "Blushing now? Well I'm so sorry for interrupting your…"

"Shut up, Kai! Just for once in your life shut up and listen to someone!" I yelled.

Kai sat in a stunned silence and waited for what I had to say.

"There's nothing between Tala and I. We're just good friends which live together. Lots of friends do live together, Kai!"

"What bull shit!" He said, calmly facing away from me. "Even if you claim to be 'just friends', I'm sure Tala doesn't see it that way." He turned to face me again and actually smiled. "You're an easy person to like, Kon."

What the Hell is going on, and where is Kai?

…because at the end of the day, unless they are gay…

"Err…thanks, I think." I stumbled, slowly turning red again.

"No one would run to you like Tala did, if they didn't love you."

I think Kai's right, even though it don't want him to be. That would explain why Tala wanted to run away with me and become my lover. I'm so blind sometimes! Seeing how Bryan was yesterday, he would never reject Tala, so why would he want to run?

"Silence upsets me, Kon."

Kai launched himself forward and sent us both crashing though many desks, till we hit the wall at the back of the room. My back was pressed against the wall, with Kai sprawled on top of me- his head resting against my own.

…you know that you are the one who's gonna end up getting hurt….

"That hurt like shit, you bastard! Why the f…"

With our foreheads already touching, Kai slowly moved in closer. My hands automatically tried to grasp the floor beneath them in shock, but couldn't.

Our noses slid in opposite directions, and a warm hand held the back of my head firmly. I could feel his musky breath on my lips, which opened in reaction to this titillation.

I waited for contact, but it never came.

…And you know something?...

"You really would have kissed me, Kon?" Kai stood up and sorted out his dislodged blazer.

"Well, I…"

"I know you're gay, I'm not a fool. Most people can tell by looking at you. But to be desperate enough to except a kiss from me! What the fuck?"

"I'm not desperate! I wouldn't just let anyone kiss me!" I shouted in my defense. Kai just snorted.

"So why me then? It's not like…"

…That day always comes sooner than you'd like to hope….

Sorry Tala…

"I love you."

"What?" Kai took steps back and tripped on a desk, sending him crashing to the floor.

"I love you, not Tala. I've always loved you!" I said surprisingly calmly.

"Why?"

So under all that 'alpha male', ego bull-shit- Kai's actually got shit self-esteem.

"Because I do." We sat in an awkward silence, which was broken when Kai suddenly clasped his hands over his mouth, and ran out.

You don't actually have to throw up over it, Kai.

I let myself go limp, and slid down the wall.

It's fucked. Everything's fucked.

I couldn't even wait till Sunday… X-day.

…The continuous looming dread, of X-day….

…………………………………………………………………………………………..

Thanks for reading and please tell me what you think about this!